Brandi nodded. She looked at Gareth. “Get Lars or Fallon to come wrap Diane Crane’s wounds. I wouldn’t want her to bleed out and go too quietly. No one tells Sheldon about her capture until we decide what to do with her. I’d rather see her dead than get returned to him as insane as ever.”
Nodding, but saying nothing to his mate’s demands, Gareth got on the phone right away to call the cats.
Brandi motioned to the hallway and Heidi went to follow, halting her exit only when she saw Ryan leaning against the doorframe. Her mate was beaten badly, and was healing slowly, but he was alive. It really was all that mattered.
Heidi walked to the man who loved her, forgetting everything else as she ran her hands over his face and his body assessing the damage. She whispered an order to his body. Ryan bit his lip at what she set in motion inside him.
Afraid to hug him in his current condition, Heidi instead leaned her forehead on his chest and let the first tears of relief fall. His lips against her hair made her eyes burn hotly.
“Travis told me you were dead. I refused to believe him. Thank you for surviving,” she whispered.
“Travis was gutted by a Healer—the one kind of werewolf capable of feeling true empathy. Seems an appropriate punishment for all the harm he’s done to our kind,” Ryan said, brokenly.
Heidi nodded as she ran her hands gently over him. “Speaking of my true calling… When you feel capable, shift three times with ten minute breaks in between. That will heal the broken bones and stop the internal bleeding. He really did a number on your kidneys. We’ll work on the rest when we get home.”
“Home sounds good. Think you’re going to boss me around for the rest of our lives?” Ryan asked, his voice broken by the pain he was in.
“Only in bed… and I expect you to return the favor about the bossing around stuff,” Heidi said, patting his chest as she followed her Beta down the hallway.
18
They walked in silence for a while, which was fine by Heidi. She was still reeling from what she’d done.
“Let’s find a room where we can talk privately,” Brandi said.
Feeling braver about facing things now that Travis was dead and Diane Crane was captured, Heidi stepped into the room where she’d had her mental meltdown. She flicked on the lights, illuminating the horror. Turning to Brandi, she watched her Beta’s gaze sweep around, unaffected by what she saw… or so it seemed.
“Have you seen this kind of atrocity before?” Heidi asked.
Brandi nodded, her gaze on the containers of preserved fetuses. “Yes. More than once, unfortunately. The bears Gareth and I rescued had been experimented on the same way. Growing an artificial shifter from scratch was Diane Crane’s evil specialty, though I don’t think she got far in her studies. However, I’ve never seen this many before.”
Heidi looked once more at the multiple shelves, then fixed her gaze on her Beta. Counting them would only make her angrier. Wanting to destroy this whole building might bring the nightmare version out again. She didn’t have complete control of that form yet.
“She saw werewolves as expendable. Diane Crane didn’t say that specifically, but I got the impression she was only working on them to fund the rest of what she was doing. She was trying to make super soldiers so she could sell them. All she genuinely cared about were the bears she created. Her intention was to round them up and she told me so several times. I believe she knows where they are.”
“Shit,” Brandi said, rubbing her forehead. “They’re probably chipped then. I didn’t think of that. I guess Gareth and I have some follow-up work to do.”
Heidi put a bloodstained hand on her Beta’s arm. “Before your agent mind takes off with its plotting and planning, I need to know the truth. Are there other scientists in the world like Diane Crane? She said there were lots of her.”
Brandi reluctantly nodded. “There are, but none are as far along in their research, or at least that’s what our intel shows. The other good news is that none are quite as brilliant as the Crane triplets. Two-thirds of those geniuses are now taken out of the game. Ariel took out one. You just stopped a second. The third is living on borrowed time.”
“Is the guy you call Shitty Sheldon like his evil siblings?”
Brandi laughed and ran a hand through her hair. “I don’t know for sure. I change my mind about him every other day. That said… I took the kids to stay with him when I came after you because I believe they’re only really safe with someone like him. Sheldon spends all his time trying to reverse engineer the work other scientists are doing. Gareth’s mate before me ended up with him after she’d been experimented on. Sheldon couldn’t save her life, but he did extend it for a few years. If you want, I’m sure Sheldon would love to take a look at your new problem.”
Heidi laughed wryly and crossed her arms. “Diane Crane isn’t responsible for that even though she thinks she is. The nanos did it to me, Brandi. They recognize the danger I’m in before I do. They were what modified my human form in that strange way, but I know with absolute certainty that every alteration was done to save my life. What you saw… well, now I can bring on the partially shifted form with only a few thoughts.”
An uncomfortable silence fell between them. Heidi wasn’t sure what to fill it with, but there was one question on her mind. “How ugly was I like that? Go ahead. You can tell me. I promise I won’t be offended by anything you say.”
Brandi laughed at the inane vanity question. She rubbed her forehead again. “I didn’t see much of your body, but your hands were like something out of an old horror movie. Damn, girl.”
“So you didn’t see the nightmare with her full ugly in place?” When Brandi shook her head, Heidi laughed. “Well, I scare people. I scared both Yana and Ryan. Diane Crane nearly wet herself. I haven’t seen myself at all, but I think a partial shift must look pretty bad if extreme fear is the net effect on everyone.”
Brandi grinned. “Bad? You mean that shifted state must look pretty bad-ass. However, I never want to see you gut someone again with your super long fingernails. It was all I could do to maintain and not start retching. You have a brutal streak when you kill that’s startling to watch, even for someone like me.”
Heidi tried to keep her mouth from twitching. It was hard. “Fine, but I can’t make any promises about the gory stuff. That version of myself seems to think that sort of violence is normal. I still don’t feel any remorse. Travis had to die. He was working for more than one mad scientist. His hate for his own kind ruled him.”
Brandi nodded. She studied her shoes a moment. “Let’s talk about something we can’t put off any longer. What do you want to do to Danger Brain Diane? I really hate that bitch. I want her dead, so I’m not capable of any rationality about her.”
Heidi opened the door, suddenly needing to leave the room full of dead babies. They were starting to make her feel ill. She couldn’t think of being merciful to Diane Crane while she thought of what those poor women who’d carried those fetuses had gone through.
Back in the hallway and walking to where they’d left everyone, she finally met Brandi’s solemn gaze. “I want fifteen minutes alone with Diane Crane and I need her awake and not on drugs. I want to see if I can change her genius mind about some things. Nothing can reverse the past, but if my influence works, perhaps she can use her genius more productively in the future. Maybe she can make a few amends for what she’s done. Travis said several countries want to kill her. Her brother is going to have to keep her close to keep her safe.”
“You can have a shot, but if it doesn’t work, Diane Crane gets a quiet bullet in that brain of hers. It’s quick and a little less messy than being gutted, so long as you use the proper caliber of ammunition. I purposely didn’t promise Sheldon her life would be spared. I want her dead.”
Heidi shook her head. “How do you think so violently and go home to your children? I’ve seen you parent. You’re a good mother.”
“Still figuring that one out myself,” Brandi a
nswered, being honest again. “Let’s look at the positive side of your suggestion. If your influence works, Sheldon’s going to be thrilled his sister is still alive. He’s going to owe you—owe us. We will use that gratitude to keep him in our debt.”
“Good,” Heidi said. “I want him to leave us alone… forever.”
“That’s never going to happen, but I like how you’re thinking,” Brandi said. “So what’s up with you and Ryan? It doesn’t seem like you’re still fighting. I take he found you in here.”
Heidi shrugged and nodded. “More like Diane found him, but she did let us see each other. As for the rest, we’re still working things out, but I finally believe he’s my mate. I do love him. Once I figure out how to live with him, we should be fine. He gave me this.” She pulled her shirt aside to show her marks.
“For a werewolf, that’s like getting engaged. If Ariel was here, she’d be laughing.” Brandi paused and then did what Gareth would have done for his pack. “I’m your Beta. That means I follow my instincts to help you make the best decisions. Ryan is a good man, but don’t rush things. It takes a while to adjust to a mating, and even afterwards there’s still work. But it’s a very good thing to go home every day to someone who loves you and wants you in their life.”
Heidi ran her hands through his fur and scratched behind both his ears while Ryan in wolf form put his muzzle across her shoulder and sighed. His pleasure at her touch made her smile and hug him.
“If you stay like this, you can come watch what I do,” she whispered. “But only you. Don’t tell Brandi or Gareth. They’re too nosy about details and I can’t even explain what I do to myself.”
Ryan licked her neck above the marks he’d given her.
Chuckling over the wolf’s idea of a kiss, Heidi rose and walked to the door of the room where Diane Crane sat tied to a chair. Her arms were bandaged now, but the only meds she’d been given was a mild analgesic to dull the pain. She told herself it didn’t matter if the scientist was hurting. If this didn’t work, Diane Crane wouldn’t be in pain for much longer.
Ryan positioned himself by the closed door, keeping watch for those entering the room while Heidi pulled up a chair to face a person she forced herself to view as her patient. The scientist sneered at her as if she’d read her mind.
“I’ve been tortured by people actually trained in the art of it. What do you think you’re going to do to me?” Diane asked flatly, sounding unconcerned.
“Heal you—if I can,” Heidi answered. “That’s who I am. That’s what I do. You see… I was a healer before I became a werewolf. All a species transmutation does is enhance what you already are and give you a big biological kick in the pants. I’m surprised someone as smart as you hasn’t figured that out by now. Maybe if you stopped torturing people and started studying them, you might gain some unexpected insights.”
“Do what you came to do and stop wasting my time,” Diane ordered. “I’ve been broken, abused, and brainwashed. None of that changed me. In nearly all cases, I killed those who did those things to me. If I get out of this, taking your life is at the top of my to-do list.”
Heidi crossed her arms. Could her influence get through so much hurt and pain? The woman seemed to have no openings left in her psyche to any emotion softer than hate.
“Have you ever been in love?” Heidi asked.
Diane shrugged. “Not the way you seem to be. I’ve always preferred to avoid that weakness. Look at the trouble it got you into.”
Heidi nodded. “I used to think it was a weakness as well. I thought of all love that way. I’m learning not to see it as something to be avoided. People—even werewolves—are capable of great change. Do you believe that, Diane?”
“Is there a point to your droning speech?”
Heidi sighed and let her arms drop. “So much for conversation. I thought you liked making small talk with people. Guess that’s just while you’re cutting on them.”
Diane glared at her. “Why are you here? If you’re going to morph into that abomination again, do it and gut me like you did Travis. I saw what you did. That’s why I hid, you fool.”
Heidi shook her head and reached out her now very human hands. She placed them on either side of Diane’s face. Could she do this? Could she find anything in this woman worth saving? She wasn’t sure, but she had to try. The brilliant woman’s death would fix nothing.
“Listen to me, Diane. I want you to dig inside your mind and go back to a time in your life when you felt your greatest emotional pain. When you get there, tell me about it.”
The woman beneath her hands moaned. Her eyes took on a glassy stare. “They don’t understand. I want to be an astronaut. I don’t want to be a scientist just because Sheldon and Randall are going to be. Can’t I be different?”
Heidi kept her voice soft. “Yes. You can be different, so long as you don’t hurt others. In fact, you can be anything you want in life. All that really matters is that you’re a good person who does good things.”
Tears fell from Diane’s eyes and ran over Heidi’s fingers.
“You don’t know how they are. They’ll hate me if I don’t do what they want.”
“No. They won’t. They’ll just be a little disappointed at first, then they will be proud. That’s what parents are like. You have to believe that, Diane.”
“Okay,” Diane said, sounding unsure.
Having gotten through the first emotional wall, Heidi focused on her bigger goals.
“Your parents were wrong and you did some wrong things trying to please them. For the next nine months, you’re going to deal with the harm you’ve done. It’s going to be awful to remember it all, but you’re going to feel empathy and sympathy for every living being you experimented on. You’re going to mentally, spiritually, and physically hurt for them. You’re going to feel their pain as if it were your own.”
“Never stop hurting. Can’t make anything right,” Diane protested, choking on her sobs.
“You’ll find a way to deal with it, because you’re meant for bigger things,” Heidi said firmly. “Ask your brother Sheldon for help.”
“Okay,” Diane said, sounding like a small child.
“After those nine months, you’re going to undergo the biggest change of your life. You will dedicate yourself to undoing the harm evil scientists are doing to innocent people. You will help save lives and come to think of yourself as a good person. Your parents will be proud of you. Your brother will be proud of you. Your mistakes will fade over the years that pass by, but it will take lots of time. Nothing and no one will ever make you do evil experiments again. Do you hear me, Diane? You’re a good person who does good things. Say this and believe it.”
“Yes. I hear you. I’m a good person who does good things,” Diane repeated.
Heidi closed her eyes, the woman’s emotional pain a living thing to her as she worked with it. There was so much bad energy around what Diane had done. The nightmare version of herself appeared in her mind and held out a hand to touch that pulsing darkness. It seemed to be saying there was nothing to fear in being merciful—odd given the brutal way it had come to her aid in killing Travis.
Then it turned and stared at her human form. If she’d been visualizing her wolf, things might have felt normal. Having a mental exchange with the nightmare version of herself made her question her own stability, but the message seemed clear. A person’s nature would always be preserved even through great changes. That meant she had to throw Diane Crane the one bone she’d didn’t want to throw… or the change wasn’t going to work.
“In your spare time, you will continue your research for safe, long distance space travel, but only as a byproduct of helping restore people to their humanity. NASA will appreciate your research and probably pay you well for it. You will seek natural solutions to all your goals. You will also help fix the earth, so it won’t die like you fear. There are many people on this planet worth saving.”
“I don’t want to die,” Diane said.
“No one does,” Heidi said firmly. “I want you to remember all we’ve talked about. Today you will begin making this great change. You won’t be believed, but that will not stop you. Do you hear my words?”
“Yes. I hear everything.”
Exhausted from trying to plant seeds of goodness in the rocky soil of Diane Crane’s warped mind, Heidi let her hands fall away.
In moments, Diane’s eyes returned to normal. She looked at Heidi in absolute terror and then down at herself. “I’m tied to a chair, but I guess you felt you had to do that. I swear I don’t even know why I did all those terrible things. Am I going to prison for what I’ve done?”
Heidi shrugged as she stood. “That depends on how you handle yourself in the future.”
“Will you help me?” Diane asked.
Heidi opened the door. “No. I’m going home. I’ve done all I can. The rest is up to you.” But she stood there staring and wondering if any real change had taken place.
Ryan growled and nudged her leg to get her out the door.
19
“It’s big and empty and I don’t have enough furniture to fill it. I let a lot go with the other house because you were right about me needing to move on. Mom said people all over town are taking pictures of furniture they want to give you if you want any of it. She’s been dropping them off to Eva once a day. The only thing I’ve bought is a new bed because I didn’t want you sleeping on the floor. It’s a king. I’m hoping one day soon you’ll invite me to share it on a permanent basis.”
“You can share it now,” Heidi said, fairly sure she felt that way.
Ryan shook his head. “Not yet. You need some time to adjust to everything. I wasn’t able to hear it before, but I get it now. It only took being captured by a crazy scientist to get over my hard-headed ideas. I love you and I believe you love me back. So long as I know where you are, I can wait until you find your answers. Maybe I can help with some of them.”
Heidi: Nano Wolves 3 Page 14