by Lisa Hobman
The world must have tilted on its axis; did she just say what I think she said? ‘But… but…’
‘I know, it’s wonderful, isn’t it? Because the book has already been read by the panel and it was a mere technicality that disqualified it, we can put it through again. Dom was keen for that to happen.’
‘Oh, my word. Was it Dom… erm Mr McAllen who contacted you on my behalf, then?’
‘No, no, it was another fan. A very enthusiastic one, I might add.’
Sandy? It must have been Sandy. I must hug her when I meet her. ‘Well, that’s incredible. Thank you.’
‘Zara, go and enjoy your weekend. I’ll see you Monday. I know there are big things in your writing future.’
‘See you Monday and thank you again, Loretta. So, so much.’
Later that evening her friends and family gathered at Zara’s apartment. Marco opened the fizz and Zara’s mum brought out the huge congratulations cake.
Applause rang around her and she felt her cheeks flaming. ‘Nothing’s definite yet, guys, but I do appreciate this after the crap week I’ve had.’
‘Ugh, bull poop, this award has your name already engraved, I can feel it,’ her mum said as she placed the cake down on the dining table. ‘Now get it cut. I think I may just have excelled myself with this one.’
She was right. The chocolate frosting smelled wonderful and the word congratulations was spelled out with white chocolate buttons and edible glitter. If this was what they did when she was potentially shortlisted and agented, what the heck would happen if she did win?
Josh was especially perky and making an extra-special effort with Zara’s dad. Sadly he was receiving quite a frosty reception, but he was trying. She made a mental note to speak to her family and ask them to go easy on him. After all, she wanted him in her life, so they would have to get used to him being around.
The cake was divine and Zara felt loved. All was right with the world for however long it lasted, and she was going to grab the happiness she felt with two hands and hold on for as long as possible. Now all that was left to do was to see what Monday brought, but she dared to let a little spark of hope ignite again and it felt so good.
35
It was good to be back in Inverness. People were rushing round just like last time, but the atmosphere was totally different from London. Not better. Just different. Zara made a mental note to pop into Highland Trax before her homebound flight and see if Patrick was around. It had been so lovely to see him at the reunion and he had said to stop by if she was in town. He’d no doubt be excited to hear what had happened and why she was in Inverness.
She met Loretta outside the Kingsman and when they walked in Loretta asked for her usual table. They were situated in a bay window with views out to the neatly kept gardens, where an abundance of colours made for a stunning outlook. With its Italian marble floors and thick, sumptuous drapes and modern chandeliers, the Kingsman was as plush as she had anticipated, and Zara was glad she had dressed in a smart designer suit for the occasion of meeting Loretta. Luckily the creases in her outfit gained on the flight had fallen out whilst she had been wandering round Inverness and enjoying the atmosphere again.
The afternoon tea arrived on two cake stands and was packed with tiny sandwiches, cakes and scones. Prosecco was placed down too, and Zara had to pinch herself under the table to make sure she wasn’t dreaming.
Loretta was a very elegant woman in her mid-forties and she reminded Zara a little of a modern-day Jane Russell. Her bright red lips were in contrast to her pale skin and dark wavy hair. Her own fitted suit dramatically matched her lips and her black stilettos complete with red soles made the already tall woman statuesque. She definitely belonged on a screen rather than behind a desk.
‘So how does it all sound to you, Zara? Do you feel we could do your work justice as an agency?’
‘I really do. I mean that. You represent some incredible authors and it would be an honour to be amongst them. Like I said, I don’t want to do this for fame or millions of pounds. Although a living would be nice, obviously. But ultimately I just love to write but never expected I would be able to write anything other than articles and features.’
‘Well, now you know it’s a possibility. Although, I can’t promise that fame won’t happen. Once a book takes off you never know where it may lead. But you can accept and decline things as you feel it appropriate; so long as it’s in line with any publishing contract we sign. And it seems to me that you have some wonderful experiences to draw from after your trip round the Highlands. It’s a route that fascinates me, although I do think you’re brave to have done it all by bicycle and camping.’
‘Brave or crazy, I haven’t figured that one out yet.’
Once they had finished their afternoon tea Loretta pulled a pile of papers from her briefcase. ‘Now, I don’t want you to feel pressured at all. If you want to take these home and have your solicitor look over them, that’s absolutely fine. Most people prefer to get a second opinion. But everything we’ve discussed is here: my commission, the specifications of the agreement, et cetera. So take the contract away and peruse it at your leisure. Then if you choose to sign, simply return it to me in the post, but scan the signature page and email it to me, then we can get the ball rolling.’
‘I will. Thank you again. Before I leave, can I ask you something?’
Loretta held out her perfectly manicured hands. ‘Fire away. What would you like to know?’
‘How did you end up contacting me? Who was it that put my name forward? Was it Sandy from the Association HQ?’
‘No. It wasn’t Sandy, although I do know she adored your book as much as I did.’
‘So who was it?’
Loretta smiled but shook her head. ‘I… I’m not entirely sure they’d want me to tell you. Can we just leave it as a wonderful occurrence? Kismet perhaps?’
Zara dropped her gaze to her empty plate. ‘Okay. It’s just that I owe that person a lot. I’d really like to thank them.’
Loretta sighed deeply. ‘Okay. Okay. It’s a little convoluted. And this is why I mentioned kismet. Believe me, I couldn’t have made this up. It’s like a movie plot.’ She laughed. ‘I’m one of three sisters. We don’t meet often due to schedules as we’re all busy with our own businesses and such, but there was a family gathering some time ago now – my parents’ fiftieth wedding anniversary, and we always make a point of attending anything our parents arrange. We each adore them. Anyway, they threw a party and my sisters and I were there. We got chatting and catching up and my baby sister, Sophie, was telling me about this friend of her fiancé’s from school who had written a book. Apparently she had just finished cycling the North Coast 500.’ She raised her eyebrows and a chill travelled Zara’s spine and she gasped.
‘Anyway, my brother-in-law-to-be, Patrick, joined in the conversation and he was telling me about how it had turned out that this friend had hired one of their bikes for the trip. He knows I’m a literary agent, obviously, and was asking for advice on how to get a book out there. I think Paddy was planning to contact you with some tips, bless him. And then, unbelievably, my other sister, Saskia, the middle, overly dramatic one…’ She rolled her eyes. ‘Saskia was telling us how her fiancé had rescued a woman who fitted the same description when she was almost hit by a tractor. We all agreed what a small world it is.’
Zara’s stomach plummeted to her shoes as the pieces of the puzzle began to fit into place. Loretta continued, waving her hand. ‘We kind of got completely off track at that point, as you can imagine, but Lachlan contacted me the day after the party and said he hadn’t wanted to interfere because you’re a very strong-willed, independent woman who doesn’t accept help easily, but that he had a copy of the book that Paddy had mentioned, your book, saved to his hard drive and that it was really, really good.’ She cringed. ‘I have to admit that I receive so many manuscripts professing to be excellent that I wasn’t all that interested, but I didn’t want to rain on his parade, as it wer
e, so I agreed for him to send it by email.’ Zara was doing her best to keep up, although the pain of finding out Lachy hadn’t been single when she had slept with him knotted her insides and made her feel nauseated.
‘Are you okay, Zara? You’ve gone very pale.’
Zara forced a smile and nodded. ‘Sorry, yes. Too much cake, I think. Please go on.’
‘I have to be completely honest that it sat on my desk untouched. So, imagine my shock when the day after that I was out to lunch with Dominic McAllen’s wife – she loved the book too, by the way – and she mentioned you again and all the things that had occurred with the third-party submission problem, et cetera. It was like a lightning-bolt moment. This person’s book was coming at me from every angle and I was sure it was fate telling me I had to do something. I asked more questions and when she realised I already had a copy of the book and I was intrigued, she asked me to read the book as soon as possible and see if I might like to represent you. So there you go. As I said, you have a lot of support. The book was the icing on the cake.’
‘So your sister, Saskia, she’s the current fiancée of Lachlan Grant.’ It wasn’t really a question. It was merely a clarification aloud that Lachy had lied to her. Just as Josh had. Men were clearly not to be trusted.
‘That’s right. Ugh, they’ve been together years. You should see how they look at each other. I wish he’d just marry the girl and do us all a favour. But, yes, bloody small world, isn’t it? Lachlan’s a lawyer, you know. A very good one too. The farm is purely inheritance and I believe he’s selling it off to move back to the city. Between you and me I think that’s partly because of Saskia’s aversion to the outdoors. She isn’t one for mud and sheep.’ She laughed. ‘But then again Saskia isn’t one for much that doesn’t have a designer label. Just don’t tell Lachlan I said so.’
‘There’s no risk of that. It’s highly unlikely I’ll ever see him again.’
36
Back in the hotel room Zara’s emotions were in turmoil. She was ecstatic that the contract for representation was only a signature away, meaning that, thanks to Loretta’s connections, the competition shortlisting was back on. But disappointment and sadness came in waves too. Why had Lachy lied to her? Was it simply because what they had shared meant absolutely nothing more than some cheap thrill with a stranger? Was it that he wasn’t ever expecting to see her again? Was it that his fiancée lived miles away and he fancied a quick shag? Was it all of the above?
She realised that it was stupid to feel so hurt by his lies when there had been no promises made; no agreements to take things any further and no future in their relationship. But nevertheless she had seen something in his eyes. She had felt a connection and thought he had felt it too. Was that why he hadn’t been able to wave goodbye? Was it guilt for being unfaithful? Probably. At least that was something to make him bloody human.
As it was late and she hadn’t felt hungry since the afternoon tea and the bizarre chain of events, she ordered a light snack from the room-service menu and flicked on the TV for background noise while she went over the contract once more. She couldn’t hold this stuff against Loretta. It was nothing to do with her business and she seemed genuine and professional.
A knock at the room door indicated that her food had arrived so she went to answer it, pinning her hair up as she walked. Without paying much attention she opened the door and said, ‘Could you just put it by the TV, please? I’ll eat it there.’
‘I could but I’m pretty sure these aren’t edible flowers.’
Zara turned quickly to find Lachlan Grant standing there, that handsome face of his smiling as if everything were perfect and he weren’t a complete and utter shithead. ‘What the hell are you doing here?’
His smile quickly faded. ‘I… I heard that you were in Inverness, through… erm friends and I thought I’d stop by and say hello… so… hello.’ He laughed nervously as she glared at him but didn’t speak. ‘Look, the thing is, I haven’t been able to stop thinking about you. I know what we had was meant to be a one-time thing but I can’t accept that, Zara. I felt something other than just a simple attraction to you. When we… when we were in bed together it was… I’ve never felt that way before and I’ve been trying to pluck up the courage to contact you. But the way I felt was so intense – and a bit scary, if I’m honest – that I was afraid of being rejected. I mean, there was the huge possibility you didn’t feel any of it and it was just my overactive imagination and a little dash of wishful thinking.’
He held up his free hand as the other still clutched the beautiful bouquet. ‘And before you say no, I know we live in two completely different locations with totally different lives, but I don’t want that to stop us from seeing if this could be something.’ He stepped closer and she could smell the intoxicating scent of his cologne. The same cologne that he had been wearing on the day they had slept together. The day he had lied to her about being single.
But as she gazed up into his deep, chocolate-brown eyes sadness washed over her and tied her in knots. Why did he have to be such a bastard? He’d seemed so caring and funny and so bloody gorgeous. And this was like something from a romance movie and right about now she should be jumping into his arms telling him that, yes, she wanted to see where this could lead. That she hadn’t been able to stop thinking about him either. Then they would tumble into bed together and seal their relationship the way it had started. But the truth remained. She was back with Josh and he was still with Saskia. He had been engaged to Saskia when they’d had sex and if he could be unfaithful to her living in the same country, he could certainly be that way when Zara lived so far away. He was a liar. A handsome, intelligent, sexy-as-hell liar. And they were ten a penny in London. She didn’t have to come all the way up here to Scotland to find one.
He smiled again and looked at her with such hope. ‘Do you think this could be something too, Zara?’ he whispered.
‘It already is something, Lachy,’ she said with a shaking voice. ‘It’s over.’ She stepped back and closed the door before walking over to the bed and sitting down. All alone.
*
‘Zara! Zee! Wake up! You’re in The Bookseller!’ Marco shouted from the hallway where he must have just collected the mail.
She yawned and rubbed at her eyes, wishing he could’ve just left her to sleep.
He burst into her room. ‘Look! This is such a gorgeous photo of you. I’m glad they used this one. You looked way too serious in the other one.’
She sat up and took the magazine from him. The headline read:
Bateman Welch New Acquisition
Marco flopped onto her bed, took it back and read, ‘“Loretta Bateman at Bateman Welch is delighted to announce her latest acquisition for representation. Zara Bailey is a travel journalist who recently cycled the North Coast 500. Ms Bateman said of Miss Bailey, ‘“She has a raw talent for emotional and thought-provoking writing that will leave readers gripped and salivating for more.” Ooh, salivating, Zee, I like that. She’s right too. I bloody loved that bit on the beach where you didn’t know what Evangeline was going to do. Would she report the murder or would she fall into Harrison’s arms…?’ he said dreamily.
She was relieved to have finally had the courage to allow her friends to read her book. Shelley had read it in one night and had telephoned her at two in the morning to shout at her for making her ugly-cry. Jake had taken the phone from Shelley and apologised that his girlfriend was inconsolable.
Shelley had snatched the phone back and said, ‘If you don’t win that bloody award, I’m going to bomb their offices, Zee.’ Then she had paused and followed this with, ‘Well, obviously not bomb them with a real bomb, but I’m very tempted to go and wipe snot on their cardigans. I’ve got plenty of it, thanks to your effing book. Which is bloody amazing, by the way.’ She had then descended into more sobs.
‘Hi, it’s Jake again. I really am sorry about this. I told her to wait until morning but she refused. I’ll get her to bed now.’
&nb
sp; Zara cringed. ‘Thanks, Jake, I’m sorry too.’ Zara had tried her best not to laugh at Shelley’s reaction but it had secretly made her so happy that the emotion had translated off the page for those in her life who meant the most.
Back in the present and Marco stood from her bed. ‘I’ll go make coffee.’
‘Good plan. I need something strong to wake me up officially, seeing as you failed unofficially and I’m still half asleep.’
He walked to the door and turned. ‘Look, I know it’s only been a week but are you okay about the whole Lachy thing now?’
Zara shrugged. ‘I have no choice, do I?’
‘Did you not want to hear him out? I mean, there may have been an explanation. And he may be single now.’
‘No, Marco. I’m with Josh now. And anyway, if Lachy was unfaithful with me behind his fiancée’s back he could just as easily do the same to me. I’m not prepared to risk that.’
‘But you’ll accept that Josh did it?’
Marco’s words stung and for a split second she wanted to slap him. But how could she when he was right? ‘It’s different, Marco. Josh and I weren’t engaged. He hadn’t even told me he loved me at that point.’
‘That’s hardly the point though, Zara. How do you know that Josh won’t cheat again?’
Her eyes widened and she raised her hands. ‘I can’t believe we’re having this conversation. It’s different, that’s it. End of. Get used to it,’ she told him angrily.
Marco nodded and half smiled. ‘I just want you to be happy, you know, Zara Bear.’
Seeing the concern in his expression melted her a little and she reached out to touch his arm. ‘I’m sorry, Marco, I know you do. But look at you and Toby. You can be happy enough for both of us for a while, eh?’
He gave her a sad smile and left her alone again. Alone to dwell on the fact that whilst one side of her life was coming together, the other side had fallen apart before the foundations had even been laid.