That Constance had died an actual death was massive, but not so much that they couldn’t overcome; the pain would live on, but so would the memories of good times. Whatever happened to celebrating the good, learning from the painful, and going in the direction God showed where people loved them?
Since when was the death of one person, no matter who they were, so catastrophic that God’s unconditional love and respect for those who were left behind was shut down? That those who, present and future, loved them were shut out because of fear, doubt, anger, anxiety, or worry?
It was time for healing, and Paloma, for one, was thankful to have enough details out in the open to pray for just that.
Miracles happened every day. She and her family were well aware of that, and she was grateful for every opportunity to help people realize that.
But what was happening here was more than that; she sensed that, at least for Kristof, this conversation was necessary to how he understood things on the trip to Israel in a few weeks.
“Well,” Ethan grumbled, “don’t you have anything to say for yourself?”
Paloma looked from Ethan to Kristof, to Vanessa, and back again to Kristof in the palpable silence between them.
“I think they’re right, and I think that there’s a lot more we could have done in life had we just allowed ourselves to heal when we lost her to begin with,” he finally said, his voice barely above a whisper. He ran a hand slowly over the patchwork fuzz left on his head, where his long hair used to be.
“You mean to say you’re actually listening to this… this….”
“I mean to say that had I allowed myself to heal, there’s another woman who I know loves me… she’s loved me for years, and had I not been stubborn; had I not been obtuse; had I not been prideful and held onto Constance’s memory so tightly and allowed myself to love this other woman back – oh, she’s a treasure, I know, but I couldn’t let myself get close; I pulled back, and still she loves me – I could have found happiness with her. And God willing, I still may, but He alone knows. Life just seems to be too late for me in regard to matters of the heart. And had I known all those years ago that I could have shared a life with someone I care for that I know loves me, and who would do anything for me, even in spite of my stubbornness, well… I would do anything to go back and change it so that I could, but I can’t.”
Paloma’s mind began to race; she wished that she could help with that, but from what she knew of traveling through the mirror, people remained the age they were going through. And what’s more, they couldn’t exactly pinpoint a time or place; it had been, seemingly, random, though, of course, God had orchestrated things in such a way that they weren’t.
But what if there were a way?
A way for Kristof and this woman he knew loved her to be together, in spite of everything? Even if they had a few months, wouldn’t it be worth it?
“I would give anything… anything to be able to just tell this woman that I miss her, and I need her and that I was wrong; that I’m sorry. And maybe I will, but a letter is a far cry from face to face, and “I’m sorry “is a far cry from “I love you.” And the truth is that I love her, and I refused to even admit it to myself until today,” Kristof said again, resituating himself on the pillows.
Paloma moved to help him, and he shooed her away.
“Maybe I’ll call her; maybe I’ll do that in the morning, when I know it’s her evening. And maybe I’ll tell her how much of an idiot I was, because we could have spent the past twenty years together, had I just let myself let go and forgive,” he continued as tears came to his eyes again. “Forgive Constance; forgive myself; forgive God. Not that God needs forgiving, but I’ve been so angry at him, taking my Constance – our Constance – from this earth that I couldn’t even see straight; I treated Paloma and a few others who reminded me of her like dirt, and for that reason alone, I know I have to change. And I’ve tried this past year, I have, but…”
“But it’s too hard to do on your own,” Vanessa said, finishing his sentence. A statement; not a question.
The man nodded, and he opened his arms wide. Vanessa set aside her tea glass finally – now just melting ice – and carefully stood, then, awkwardly, bent low to hug the man.
Paloma’s thoughts whirled within her.
Kristof Sage; Ethan Peacock’s brother-in-law; Vanessa’s near-brother-in-law. And for all these years, she’d had no indication they were more than casual friends who used to work together.
So, how were they going to move forward as a family now? And how would their relationships change as a result of this conversation?
Only time, Paloma knew, would tell.
She just prayed they’d get closer as a result, and that, now, finally, the woman Kristof had mentioned loving him would get the phone call she’d been waiting for a long time; probably praying for, too, if she was a believer.
As Ethan said his goodbyes, promising to discuss more later, and Vanessa held onto Kristof for what seemed to be dear life, Paloma prayed for all of them, and even more for the woman who had waited so long to hear words like the ones Kristof had just uttered.
And in her heart, she knew… it was never too late.
Four
Portland, Oregon… June 30, 2025
Edward made his way through the double doors of the Burgerville down the road from Rutherford Research, and sighed.
What a meeting, he thought as he stepped into line behind an elderly couple who were holding hands as the woman’s walker was used as a seat for the time being.
He waved to the ever-smiling Doug, whose Down’s Syndrome never seemed to discourage him, and took out his order notes. Their guests, Yared and Earnest, had been invited to stay for lunch on Jason’s dime, and Edward knew that time was of the essence. “How are you,” he called to the man as he bustled past with a roll of trash can liners.
“Busy, but not so much as yesterday,” Doug told him. “Yesterday, my brother got married and we had a big party.” He beamed at Edward, pausing long enough to hear the reply.
“Well, congratulate him for me. Mac, right?”
“Yeah,” Doug confirmed. “Mac and Susie. We knew her all the way since high school,” he continued. “And she got married once before, and Mac married once before, but those didn’t work too well. But Mac and Susie? They’re just different enough and just the same enough to work well together, I think.”
Edward grinned as he shuffled forward behind the older couple, who were now at the counter placing their order. “That’s great! I think that’s always a good idea; enough the same, and enough different. Makes life interesting.”
“Yeah,” Doug told him, nodding. “Anyway, I gotta get back to the garbage now, but you take care.”
Glancing back down at the list in his hand, Edward pulled out his wallet in preparation for ordering, even as the couple in front of him continued to decide which meal they wanted to share. At least when I get to the counter, there shouldn’t be much in the way of more delays, he thought as they decided on a two cheeseburger meal and counted out their change to pay for it.
If he didn’t think they’d feel insulted, he’d offer to pay for it himself.
Once he placed his order, he moved aside, waiting so the next person in line could order. After the older couple’s order came, Edward waited another moment to talk with the cashier.
His own order had yet to be filled.
“That older couple. Do they come here often? I think I’ve seen them here before,” he asked the familiar, thin blonde teenager behind the counter whose nametag read Jenny.
“Nearly every day; more often than you and your people,” she told him. “Why?”
“Well, I didn’t want to offend them, but I want to bless them,” he said, even more quietly now. “I know you don’t usually do this, but could I pay for a gift card on their behalf? It’s a bit unorthodox, I know, but… Maybe just turn let you all give it to them and keep it anonymous?”
He let his words taper
off as his order number was called, indicating that it was filled and ready to go.
“I’ll have to ask the manager, but I think…” Jenny turned around and moved toward the mustached man working the fry machine and spoke to him quietly for a couple of minutes.
Edward watched as she pointed in his direction, and then he followed the line of her point toward the couple who had been in line ahead of them, now seated in a booth with the woman’s walker folded up, and splitting their fries.
He glanced back to Jenny and the manager, who was now nodding with a smile. The young woman spent a few more moments discussing something with the man as Edward noted a family coming to step into line, and then, Jenny was back at her till.
“How much did you want to, er… contribute,” she asked pleasantly. “I’ll ask the manager to give it to them anonymously.”
“I’d really appreciate that,” Edward said, relieved. “Fifty should last them a little while, don’t you think?” He glanced in his wallet; noted he had twenties, but no fifties. “Make that sixty,” he said, smiling down at her. “No fifties here, and all the more to bless them with one more meal together.”
He handed three twenties over, feeling the eyes of the people in line behind him watching his every move.
“Welcome to Burgerville,” Jenny told them. “I’ll be right with you, and we appreciate your patience.”
She put the cash in the drawer and printed out a receipt for him. Then, she grabbed a gift card from the nearby rack, put the cash onto it, and handed it to her manager to give to the couple.
Satisfied, Edward picked his order up from the counter, smiled, said his goodbyes to Jenny and Doug, and headed for his van.
Making sure the bags and the holder of drinks were secured, he pulled his phone out. “Call Jason at work,” he told it, and the phone dialed.
Within moments, his boss’s face was on the holoscreen, smiling. Through the shimmer of the holographic image, Edward could see the manager of the restaurant heading toward the older couple at their booth against the window.
“On the way back now,” he told Jason. “See you all in ten minutes or less,” he said as he slid behind the wheel. “Unless traffic’s bad, it shouldn’t be that long.”
“Sounds good,” Jason told him, and he saw Yared nodding in the background. “They’re both anxious to try Burgerville food; this will be a first, apparently.”
Edward watched the old man nod as the manager handed the gift card to him. The old woman seemed to blush as she fidgeted with a napkin, looking back and forth between the table and the manager.
Chuckling, and feeling good about having done something worthwhile, Edward set the phone on the dash long enough to start the van. “Well, the wait will be over soon enough,” he assured them before hanging up. He moved the phone back to his pocket, buckled in, and waited his turn to back out of the parking space. Then, after leaving the parking lot, headed south to get back to the office.
A traffic jam rerouted him by three blocks, but, thankfully, he still made it back in the ten minutes he’d estimated. He maneuvered back into his parking spot, shut down the vehicle, and, removing his seatbelt, walked around to gather up the food and sodas. He set them on the hood long enough to lock the van and then headed inside, thankful that Malik was close at hand to open the door for him.
“What took so long,” the man asked, not unkindly.
“There was something I needed to do to help an older couple at the restaurant, that’s all. I don’t think it added much time to my regular trip over; I just think we had a bigger order, and that took a few minutes more,” he told Malik genially.
“Oh?”
Edward nodded, not bothering to explain.
What good would it do to broadcast what he’d done? It wasn’t really that big of a deal, or it shouldn’t be.
Wouldn’t most people have helped someone they felt was in need, in his situation,?
Sadly, he knew better.
Many people wouldn’t.
He walked into Jason’s office behind Malik, then passed out everyone’s orders to them before sitting down to pray over and then enjoy his own.
Five
Vancouver, Washington… July 2, 2025
“We told you already, boys,” Edward said for the third time that morning as Paloma cleaned up the syrup, peanut butter, fruit compote, and fresh berries from the table, where they’d just finished their pancake breakfast. “Your birthday celebration will have to wait for Saturday afternoon. I know it’s inconvenient; I know you want to have a bunch of people over for the Fourth of July again for your birthday, but after last year’s antics – and now that we have a guest to consider – we aren’t doing anything loud and big; not again.”
Chosen and Duncan frowned at him from their end of the table, and even Cherish hung her curly head. Kristof, face unreadable, just watched back and forth through the conversation, and Paloma had said little.
Edward knew she stuck by him in the decision; they’d discussed it more than once together before talking with the boys about it, but they were growing up, and it was time they learned that they didn’t need a big party every year.
Turning twelve, the pair would need a good group of friends to help celebrate, of course. It was only natural for them to want to have fun. But at the same time, it didn’t have to be loud or raucous. They had indicated they’d wanted movies and pizza anyway, so what was the big deal waiting one extra day? After all, that made for two days of merry-making, didn’t it?
“But, Papa,” Duncan began, his long curly hair slicked back with gel and his face in an intense frown. “Everyone else gets their birthday on their birthday in the summer.”
“Well,” Paloma put in, sitting back down at the table, “if we were like everyone else then what fun would that be? Just think of it this way: you know how Papa shares his birthday with a holiday; you do, too. But this year, you won’t have to, because we’ll have all of Saturday to celebrate you and Chosen.”
Edward noted a small smile beginning to form on Chosen’s lips, though the boy said nothing.
“And that way, the fireworks will be separate from the movies and pizza,” he put in. “Remember how, last year, you had to keep turning the television up and down because of the fireworks? It irritated you so much you sent people home early. This way, there’s no sending anyone home for not being able to hear. And besides,” he continued, looking over to Kristof. “I think the fireworks will be more than enough noise for our guest, don’t you, for one night?”
Chosen shrugged, then nodded his head even as Duncan abruptly stood and walked away muttering something under his breath.
“Umba,” Cherish said as she watched her brother walk away. “Duncan swore again!”
“Did anyone ever tell you it isn’t polite to tattle, young lady,” Kristof finally said, glancing between the now stock-still Duncan and his gloating sister. “And did anyone tell you, young man, that as upset as you are, there’s no need for that type of language?”
Edward and Paloma glanced at each other, and he held his breath.
It had been a while since Kristof had butted into a family conversation like this but each time, the kids had listened. Would they continue to do so, or was the charm of it lost on them now?
Cherish rolled her eyes. “I don’t care,” she nearly shouted. “Every time I do something wrong, I get caught; they don’t get caught even a third of the time, and I’m tired of it. I’m the girl, and I’m the baby, and I still get picked on. All I did was said he swore; I know Mama doesn’t like swearing, and Papa, you don’t either, right?”
She looked to Edward for confirmation, and he nodded. It was true; curse words had no place in their home, as far as he was concerned. “But we’ve also told you we don’t like gossip, even when someone is in the room, haven’t we, young lady? Neither is better or worse than the other, but neither is a good thing to carry around as a habit, is it?”
“Oh, stop coddling them,” Kristof erupted. “And s
top coddling me, while you’re at it. I don’t care if they have people over on the Fourth of July. I’d rather one night of painfully loud torture than twice the amount of loud activity,” he continued, more softly.
“But we’ve already decided-,” Paloma began, only to be interrupted.
“Did you consult with me? Ask if it would be better one way or the other,” Kristof asked. “Did you even think to ask me at all?”
Duncan came to sit back at the table, and the other kids hung their heads a moment before returning their gaze to Kristof. Edward watched Paloma’s face move from confusion to riveted attention.
“Well, we-”
“You what? Didn’t want to bother with asking me? Wanted to do this on your own, not even consulting the guest? And since when am I just a guest, if I’m staying until I die, anyway? I called my lady friend, and you know what she said?”
Edward’s eyebrows rose.
Kristof had a lady friend?
What had he missed?
Time to pay closer attention, he told himself even as Paloma spoke again.
“What?”
“She said that if I paid her way to come here, she’d marry me, even if I have been acting like an old goat,” he informed them. “But that we’d have to live in a place of our own, but I said I’d already told you I’d stay here, and she actually hung up on me! Me; Kristof Sage. I was hung up on, simply for proposing to her.”
Paloma cleared her throat, and then, she was laughing. Kristof glared at her, and Edward just sat, fascinated, listening and watching the scene unfold.
“What are you laughing at,” Kristof asked, frowning.
The Angels' Mirror Pack 2: Books Four through Seven Page 93