“Holy shit, woman,” he said when he caught his breath, rubbing his face. It wasn’t often the man was speechless.
“You like it when I’m in charge,” I stated with a smile. Cane was usually the dominate in the bedroom and that was how I liked it. Every once in a while though, I liked to turn the tables a little bit to spice things up.
“I do. Sometimes,” he smiled back. “It’s hot when you use me for your pleasure and it’s always hot when you come. I can never get enough of you, Lindsey.”
We lay there for a while, neither of us talking. I had slung a leg over his, wrapping myself in him. Now that my desire for him had been temporarily satiated, there was so much I wanted to say but didn’t know where to start.
“I’m glad you’re back in LA,” he finally whispered, kissing the side of my head.
“Me too,” I replied. He wasn’t the only reason I was glad to be back. I belonged here. I loved the music industry and writing about it.
“How’s your dad?” He rubbed my arms.
“He’s good. I’m still worried about him but he’s better and he assured me he would be okay. I have some family friends checking on him.” I put my chin on his chest and looked up at him. “He actually was the one that urged me to come back here.”
“That’s great. He wanted you come back to LA?” I knew that would surprise him. I was always telling him how much my parents hated me living in LA and what I did for a living. I guess sometimes it took someone dying for people to realize what was really important.
“Yes. He also encouraged me to talk to you.” I grinned at hm. “He said that before Mom died she told him to watch out for me. She told him she had no doubt you were the love of my life.”
I could see the goose bumps on his arm after I said that. “She said that?”
“I guess so,” I shrugged. I wished she had said that to me. We had talked about Cane briefly, but these last three years may have been so different if I knew what she thought.
“What about your boyfriend? He was a surgeon, wasn’t he? Didn’t your mom always want you with someone like your dad and brother?”
I sat up on the bed and hugged my knees to my chest. It was hard to talk about Zach with Cane, but I wanted to be honest with him. If this was going to work, we couldn’t ever have secrets between us again. It was painful though because I was still healing from that relationship as well; Zach may not have been the one, but I still cared about him a great deal and I hated hurting him. The look he gave me right before I left his apartment still haunted me.
“Zach was asking me to move in with him. I was worried about Dad of course, but something else was holding me back. He asked me before we went to LA for the Rolling Stone party and I told him I would give him an answer when we got back. Then I saw you,” I looked down at him, my gaze taking in the tattoos that covered his body. I had missed them. “That really confused me. I knew I wasn’t over you. Zach was a great boyfriend though. He loved me and would have made me happy.”
“Was he good in bed?” Cane asked, his voice on edge.
I laughed. Leave it to a man to ask something like that. “He was, but it was different than you and I. Zach was always a very attentive lover and I had no complaints in the bedroom, but we lacked something. When you and I make love, there’s such a passion and urgency. It’s like you need me to live.”
“I do,” he said softly, pushing himself up on the bed to sit by me. “I need you like the air I breathe. I know that now.”
I smiled and reached out to touch his face. He turned his head and kissed my palm. “I know, you do. I need you like that too.” He released my hand and I sighed. “I was conflicted on what to do. I talked to my dad and he pointed out that if I wasn’t jumping at the chance to live with Zach, we probably had bigger issues. He was right but I hated hurting him. I broke up with him that day and called Rebecca to ask her if I could stay with her while I found a place. I left two days later with all of my stuff and drove here. The rest is history.”
“I really am sorry you had to hurt him. When you left here and told me to never contact you again, I was sad, but most of all, I wanted you to be happy. If he was the one to make you happy, I was going to have to live with that. I hated it, but you were all that mattered.”
“What about you? No girlfriends?” I asked. I found it hard to believe that Mr. Rock God had stayed single all this time. When we first got together, women were lining up to be with him. He may not be the lead singer of a popular rock band anymore, but he was still as sexy as ever.
“No girlfriends,” he said emphatically with a shake of his head. “After you dumped me and the mess with Destiny, I hit rock bottom. I was drunk all the time and sleeping with anything that had two legs and a pussy.” I cringed at his words but it made me sad to think of him in so much pain. “Diesel, as usual, saved me. I don’t know where I would be without him – dead probably. He and Tracy have been life savers and taken good care of me. Anyway, after rehab, I sort of vowed off of women. Besides, I always compared them to you and no one measured up.”
I shook my head and laughed. “I find that hard to believe.”
“It’s true,” he insisted. “Tracy tried to set me up with friends and people she knew, but it never went further than one date. I think being around the two of them didn’t help. They are so in love and much like I imagined you and I would be like if we were together. I wanted what they had and I wasn’t feeling it with anyone.”
“Did you know I was going to be there tonight?” I asked.
“Not at first,” he said. “We were in the car on the way to the party when Tracy told me you were back in town. She wasn’t sure if you were coming to the party or not though. She also had heard you came here with no boyfriend. I decided then and there I was going to take a chance and try to win you back.”
I grinned so big my face hurt. When I met Cane, he was such a conceited asshole. Over time, he had given me a glimpse into his heart and now he laid it on the line completely for me to see. Most people never saw this side of Cane Stephens.
“Then I saw you at the bar in that tiny dress.” He smiled slyly at me. “Everything I was going to say to you went out the window. All I could think about was getting you naked and in my bed.”
“Typical guy,” I shook my head. I was teasing, but I felt the same way when he was standing behind me at the bar. I was available again and we were back to living in the same town. There was no reason we couldn’t be together. When his lips touched my ear and he I heard his sexy voice whisper my name, I was a goner.
“I have to say one thing. I’m sorry about the whole mess with Destiny. I handled it wrong and I was an idiot. It’s not an excuse, but I had never really been in a relationship before and it freaked me out.” He ran his hand through his already messy hair. “I was scared about how you would react instead of trusting you and your feelings for me. I’m sorry.”
“It’s okay. It’s in the past. I shouldn’t have run like I did either and given you a chance to explain. We both made mistakes. What matters is we learned from them,” I said and reached out to run my hand through his hair. He was still my sexy rock star and he always would be.
He nodded. “Ok, then I have a question for you.” He took my hand in his. “You said you didn’t have a place to live yet in LA?”
My mouth went dry. “I did.”
“What if you lived here with me? Or we could find something else bigger or better? I don’t care, as long as you’re with me when I go to bed at night and next to me when I wake in the morning,” he said, talking fast like a little kid excited about something.
“Yes,” I said immediately. This time I didn’t need to think about it or have a million of reasons why it wasn’t good idea. This time it felt right.
“Yes?” He asked, his eyes wide.
“That’s what I said,” I replied. “Do I need to spell it out better for you, Cane?” I leaned in close to his face and put my hands on his cheeks. “Yes, I will move in with you.”
Before I knew what was happening, he had tackled me, pinning me down to the bed. “I love you, Lindsey,” he said. “Always.”
I arched beneath him, pressing my body against his erection. “Always.”
Epilogue
One Year Later
“Are you almost ready?” She yelled from the living room. I checked my reflection in the mirror one last time. My short dark hair was messy with gel holding it in place. I was wearing an old Hookers and Hand Grenades t-shirt and my worn leather pants. I smiled when my wedding right caught the light in the mirror.
After that night in my apartment, things happened quickly between Lindsey and me. She moved in that week and six weeks later I asked her to marry me. She mentioned Vegas but after the whole Destiny debacle, I liked to stay as far away from that city as I could. Instead I managed to book us a quickly destination wedding in the Dominican. Diesel and his wife came with us and her brother and Dad even made it.
“Cane, it’s time to go. They can’t start without the lead singer!” She yelled again.
“Fine, I’m coming,” I muttered left the bathroom. I smiled when I found her standing in the living room, checking herself out in the full length mirror we had by the front door. I came up behind her and wrapped my arms around her growing stomach.
When we got back from the Dominican, we both threw ourselves into our work. Our record label was deemed a success and we were working long hours. Lindsey’s book about life on the road with rock stars was a huge, making multiple best seller lists. She was in high demand, appearing on talk shows both on TV and radio. Her writing career was on fire.
Then she got sick. She was in bed for a couple days with what we thought was the flu. On her brother’s insistence, I took her to the doctor and we learned she wasn’t sick; she was pregnant! It certainly wasn’t how we had planned things but we were excited.
“You look amazing,” I muttered into her neck. We had a wild sex life before the pregnancy but between her hormones and my crazy attraction for the woman carrying my baby, it was really hot now.
“I look fat,” she pouted. She was twenty-two weeks and looked like she had swallowed a small basketball. She hated the maternity clothes that were like big tents and preferred to wear most of her regular clothes when she could. Tonight, she had on her strapless black dress and since her tits had grown with the pregnancy, she looked like she was about to spill out of it. If we weren’t running late, I would have bent her over the back of the couch for a quick fuck.
“I do not look like the wife of a hot rock star.” She put her hands on her stomach.
“Don’t be ridiculous,” I said, turning her around in my arms so she was facing me. “You are fucking sexy as hell. You know I love the way you look.” I looked down at her chest. “Most women we know pay a lot of money for tits as big as yours and bonus for me – yours are real.”
She laughed and shook her head. “They won’t stay that big forever.”
It was my turn to pout. “Bummer.”
“We need to go. The car is here and your fans await you, Mr. Rock God.” She picked up her small purse and took my hand to lead me out to the car.
We were on our way to a show – my show. The success of the record label had renewed people’s interest in Hookers and Hand Grenades. We were all doing different things now, but our old manager convinced us to reunite for a small series of shows. We were on our way to play a small club in LA. It was a big change from our days of selling out huge venues, but that was okay. My life was different now and being on the road eighty percent of the year no longer appealed to me.
On the ride to the club she looked over at me. “Are you nervous?” she asked, running her thumb over the back of my hand.
“A little,” I admitted. It had been four years since I had performed. Our rehearsals had gone well and we played together like we hadn’t been apart for so long, but it was different when you played in front of a live crowd.
“You’ll be great. You’re Cane Stephens; how could you be anything but?” she squeezed my hand and smiled.
I leaned over for a quick kiss. With Lindsey by my side as my biggest supporter, I could do anything.
We arrived at the club and I was shocked at the amount of people waiting outside. I was worried hardly anyone would show up and it looked like they were having to turn away people. The nerves went into overdrive.
“See, they still love you,” she teased.
I had the driver take the car to the back of the club so we could sneak in. I didn’t need my pregnant wife to get mauled by a crowd of people. He parked by the back door and we hopped out and walked in quickly.
The rest of the guys were there and from the tight smiles on their faces, I could tell they were as nervous as I was. It made me feel better to know I wasn’t the only one.
The stage manager spotted us and came over, holding his clip board like a security blanket. “You guys go on in five. Are you all set?”
We all nodded and grunted. “Great,” he said with a smile and went over to talk to someone else.
The adrenaline was really pumping now and I was filled with an excitement I had never felt. In the past, when we went on stage I was usually drunk or high. Now I was going on with a clear head and it was total different kind of rush.
Lindsey came over and wrapped her arms around my waist, looking up at me. “You guys will be great, I know it.” She went up on her tip-toes for a kiss.
I leaned down and kissed her. “Thanks, babe.”
“Ok guys, it’s time.” The stage manager came back over to us. I released Lindsey and nodded at him.
“Let’s do this!” I said to the guys. They cheered and I winked over at Lindsey before we walked out on stage.
It was dark and the crowd was cheering and whistling. I grabbed the mic out front in my hand and when the lights went on, the crowd went wild.
I leaned into the mic. “Hey everyone, this is Cane Stephens and you guys are about to get rocked by Hookers and Hand Grenades!”
I glanced towards the side of the stage and saw Lindsey standing there with a smile on her face, her hands cradling her stomach. Once upon a time I thought I had it all, but I really had nothing. For the first time in my life, I had all I needed.
The End
Watching for more stories of the other Hookers and Hand Grenades band members, coming in 2019.
About the Author
Sammi lives in the Midwest with her own book boyfriend and two daughters. When she's not reading or concocting steamy stories, she loves hiking, camping, and watching her girls play basketball.
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Also by Sammi Starlight
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All I Need: Hookers and Hand Grenades Book One Page 23