by Lindy Dale
I took another calming breath, said my mantra a few more times and turned to Cole smiling, because despite my nerves at being within ten feet of cake, I was also rather excited. “So, what’s the surprise?”
“This way, madam.”
Cole led the way to the display case.
Oh, the cakes were calling me now. I could hear them but I wasn’t going to answer because I knew they couldn’t talk. They were little blobs of eggs and flour and milk. Very attractive little blobs, all the same.
Cole swept his hand towards to a lone piece of dark, muddy, chocolate cake sitting on a white porcelain plate. It had been garnished with a strawberry, sliced lengthways and fanned out. It was dusted in cocoa and bore a glittered label that read ‘Olivia’s Chocolate Cake’ in silver writing.
Olivia’s cake? What the hell was he thinking?
Instantly, my heart began to pump faster. I could literally feel the clamminess in my palms. I tried to swallow and smile but my tongue was a furry tennis ball in my mouth. How could he make me cake? He knew. He absolutely knew what it would do to me.
Cole must have sensed the change in my demeanour because he held up a hand, right as I was about to speak. “Before you go blowing a gasket, let me explain. This is a flourless, sugarless cake. There’s nothing in it you can possibly become addicted to and one piece every now and then won’t do any harm to your diet.”
A flourless cake? Such things did not exist. How could cake be made without flour and sugar? It’d taste revolting. Those ingredients were the whole point of cake.
“What’s in it?”
“Dates, some cocoa, that sort of stuff. The dates give it the sweetness without the sugar and they’re a fruit so you’re technically fulfilling a portion of your ‘five and two’ for the day. I’ve tried out a few different recipes but this one’s the best. It’s bloody delicious, and that’s not me talking myself up either.”
Dates in a chocolate cake? It was madness. But not as crazy as the fact that Cole had spent who knew how many hours scouring the ‘net for recipes and then testing them before deciding on the one in front of us.
“How many is a few?”
“Eight at last count.”
“And you tasted them all?”
“Shannon helped. Some of them were effing disgusting. Wouldn’t feed them to Lulu. But a couple were okay and the one I’ve made for you has been tweaked to enhance the flavour and so the texture is extra muddy. I know you like mud cake. You up for it?”
I turned my eyes to the cake. I wanted to try a piece but the nerves were building in my stomach at the idea. “I guess so.”
Cole went behind the counter and took the cake from the cabinet. He dipped a knife into hot water and carefully cut two slithers and plated them with a measured dollop of double cream, a strawberry and an extra dusting of cocoa. He handed the first plate to me. “For you.”
“Thank you.”
I considered the cake for a minute.
“It’s fine, Olivia. It can’t hurt you.” He handed me a sheet of paper that contained the recipe. I glanced at the ingredients. He was right. As usual. There was nothing in that cake that was going to make me want more cake. It was made of disgusting things like coconut oil and almond meal. I didn’t even like almonds. In fact, I wasn’t so sure I even wanted to eat it.
It looked delicious though.
Taking the spoon, I cut off a portion and some cream and popped it in my mouth. Oh boy. It was heaven.
After months of denying myself, I felt like I’d been given free rein in a chocolate factory complete with a swimming pool filled with chocolate for me to dive into. The cake was moist and smooth and oh, so, chocolaty. I took another mouthful, savouring the flavours before I swallowed.
“Like it?”
I don’t know why he had to ask. I was licking my lips in anticipation of the next bite. “I’ve never tasted cake like it before. Are you sure this is flour and sugar free?” Because no matter what Cole told me, I was sceptical. Something that tasted so good would have to have implications for my hips.
“You saw the ingredients. I wouldn’t string you along. The only things in that cake are what’s written on that page.”
“Well, it’s amazing.”
“So you think I should add it to the product line? It’s not strictly a cupcake but I’m going to try out a few on the weekend to see if the batter holds up when it’s done as individual serves.”
“Definitely. In fact, I’ll even come and help you taste test if you want. As long as we can go for a run beforehand.” I was about balance in this new life of mine. All I had to do was work out the points value of that cake and I was set.
“Sounds like a plan. Now I’d best get to work. By the way, I have a favour to ask.” Cole stuffed the remainder of his slice into his mouth.
“Yeah?”
He swallowed his cake and put the plate on the cabinet top. His face took on a serious appearance. “It’s Phoebe’s birthday on Sunday. I know it sounds like I’m a head case but I’ve had her ashes sitting in a box in my bedroom since she passed away. I was wondering if you knew a pretty place we could scatter them? Somewhere she’d like. And... if you’d come with me to do it?”
There was nothing I’d like more than to provide some moral support after everything Cole had done for me. “I know the perfect place. We can discuss the logistics on Saturday.”
“Great.”
“Cool.”
I handed Cole my empty plate and went up to my tippy-toes, kissing his mouth. “Time to get back to the shop. Fannying around here won’t get Mrs Di Marco’s dog clipped.”
“Pity.”
I quirked an eyebrow. “Why?”
“You do fannying so well.”
Chapter 30
Olivia’s car screeched into the driveway around eleven on Sunday morning and came to a halt millimetres from Cole’s front veranda. From the sitting room window, he watched as she flung open the door and dashed up the front stairs like a blonde tornado.
Geez, she was only ten minutes late; it wasn’t like the world was going to end. But knowing Olivia, she’d be having a stress attack about it. She was so anal about punctuality, he was finding. Not that he minded. He couldn’t stand people who constantly turned up late either. It was one of a number of things he’d found out they had in common which had been something of a surprise to him given she was such a contradiction in terms. How was it even possible to adore troll dolls yet think garden gnomes were creepy? Those ones painted in football team colours were a bloody crack up.
Smiling to himself at the quirkiness of this wonderful girl he’d gotten himself involved with, Cole went to answer the door.
Olivia was panting but her face lit up when he bent to gently peck her lips.
“Sorry I’m late. The dog threw up on the rug. Again. Do you realise how hard it is to get spew from between the pile of a shag pile rug?” She flung her hands in the air as if to demonstrate the difficulty of the situation.
Cole didn’t want to think about it. “Next time we have sex in front of the fire, you can be on the bottom.”
“Next time? Who said anything about a next time? I have carpet burns on my knees from last night; I’ll have you know. If there’s to be any next times, it’ll be in the comfort of a nice soft bed.”
“Party pooper.” Cole gave a chuckle.
“Weirdo,” Olivia countered.
Cole turned to the hallstand, picking up his car keys, a picnic basket and a violet coloured glittered box that looked as if it had been decorated by a five year old in art class. A very reluctant five year old.
“Is that Phoebe’s box?”
Cole could see the amusement in Olivia’s eyes. “Don’t take the piss. If I’d had my way, Phoebs would have been kept in one of those tasteful karri wood boxes with a brass lock but she wouldn’t have it. So I made this one for her. I tried my best. Craft has never been my forte.”
“Obviously. Did Phoebe see the box before she passed away?”<
br />
“Yes and her reaction was the same as yours. I was going to paint hearts on it but she said she’d rather die than be stuck in a box with love hearts over it. So she ended up supervising while I decorated this one.”
“She had a sense of humour, then, that daughter of yours?”
“Crazy kid.” He walked to the door. “Ready?”
“Yep. I thought we might take my car. I’m shocking at giving directions. It’s better if I follow my own nose rather than pointing yours.”
“Okay by me,” Cole replied. He pulled the front door shut and they headed for the car.
Olivia flipped the rear door for Cole to dump his gear and ran around to the driver’s side. By the time she reached it, Cole had already buckled himself into the passenger seat. She ducked her head and got into the car, swallowing a snort, which he was pretty sure, was because of him.
“You look like a giant sitting on a toadstool,” she said.
“I feel like one. This is the smallest car I’ve ever been in. How the hell do you fit your groceries in?”
“Told you. I don’t cook. Therefore, there is no need for groceries.”
“Right. Is this place where we’re going to far?” His knees were around his neck and his body was practically bent double. He didn’t know if he could sit in that position for more than a couple of minutes. He was positive he’d be unable to get out of the car when they got there.
“Put the seat back if you like. It’ll give you more leg room.”
“I already did.”
Olivia giggled. “Oh well. It’s only a couple of minutes away. Think you can survive?”
“I hope so. But next time we’re going in my car. This is like sitting inside a Legomobile.”
Olivia turned the keys and the ignition began to purr. “Let’s get going then.”
*****
Two or three kilometres out of town, Olivia made a sharp left turn that threw Cole’s head against the passenger window. She began to drive down a red gravel track.
Well, it was more of a bumping motion. The crown of Cole’s head was so close to the roof of the car, he thought he was going to go flying through the sunroof at one point.
“Where are we going?” He was intrigued. He’d blithely driven up the highway passing the gravel road on numerous occasions but had never noticed it before. There were so many places in town he hadn’t had a chance to explore yet, many of them he was sure only locals would know of. Hopefully, Olivia would agree to be his guide on another occasion. They were getting along pretty well. And despite her insistence that she wanted to take the relationship slow, Cole knew she was becoming attached to him, as he was to her. He could see it in her eyes every time they met. There was a certain brightness that hadn’t been there before.
“Told you. It’s a surprise. I was considering blindfolding you but I heard you were afraid of the dark.” She suppressed a smirk. Damn girl seemed to be doing a lot of that today.
“Have you been talking to Adelaide?”
“Only via text.”
“Which is plenty enough.” Cole reached over and put a hand on Olivia’s knee, squeezing it hard on the muscle. “What else did she say?”
“Ouch. I don’t think that’s any of your business. And torturing me isn’t going to make any difference.”
“I could withhold privileges.”
Not that he would. A minute without his hands on her was like a lifetime. Didn’t hurt to string her along, though.
Olivia swiped his hand away. “Two can play that game, Anderson.”
She swung the car into a clearing and switched the ignition off. “We’re here.”
Cole looked around him. He assumed she knew what she was doing ‘cause so far, this place was nothing to write home about. Pretty ordinary, in fact. A bunch of eucalypt trees, a few yellow bushy things and a signpost labelled ‘Little Bangor Pool’ that pointed to a track leading somewhere he couldn’t see.
“I know it doesn’t look much,” Olivia said, “but our destination is a minute or so down that track. And as you can see, it’s not exactly suited to cars.”
Cole nodded. Didn’t look like it was suited much to people either but he’d trust her. If Olivia said she knew the perfect spot to lay Phoebe to rest, then that’s what he was going to see a minute or so down that track.
By the time Cole had unwound his body and reached the back of the car, Olivia had already unpacked. She had the picnic basket hooked over her arm and had tossed a red chequered blanket in on top of the food.
“Sure you don’t want me to carry that?” Cole asked.
“I’m good. You look after that precious cargo.” She indicated the box that held Phoebe’s ashes.
As Cole followed Olivia down the narrow track, she chattered away telling him how much she thought he’d love this spot, how she used to come here with her parents when she was younger and about the spectacular scenery. She spent a good five minutes extolling its virtues, or she could have been trying to take his mind off things. Cheeky minx. She must have known this was like the final goodbye for him, that Phoebe was going to be gone forever after he cast her ashes to the wind. Which was a lot healthier than keeping them in a box on the bedside table like he’d been doing. That was bordering on weird; even he knew that.
The track turned a corner and opened into a clearing with trees framing a vista like Cole had never seen before.
Holy cow.
Even with the incessant chatter, Olivia had managed to undersell the sheer beauty of the place. It took his breath away.
Cole looked to where Olivia stood beside him, grinning.
“Great, huh?”
“I’ve never seen anything like it.”
A sheer cliff face made entirely of boulders smooth from thousands of years of water running over them stretched as high as the eye could see. The water cascaded into a lake — of the brightest emerald green — surrounded by native bush on three sides and rocks where they now stood. There was a viewing platform made of timber and someone had carved a set of steps into the rock to form seating areas at the side of the pool, so you could sit or dive or whatever. He could imagine Phoebe there, plunging into that water or crawling from it to lie like a mermaid on the rocks. She’d always loved water.
A hand came to rest on his arm. “What do you think?”
“I think it’s perfect. Phoebe would have adored this place and I know she’s going to love being here for eternity.”
“I knew you’d like it. It was one of my favourite places as a kid. I still like it now, though I don’t get the chance to come here often.”
Cole knew how that felt. Life tended to get in the way. “We’ll have to rectify that — once a year on Phoebe’s birthday, at least.”
Olivia gave him a gentle smile. It was like the whole world shone in her eyes, like she understood everything he’d gone through and was still going through. “I think at least twice a year. Half-birthdays are the best.”
What the hell was she on about?
“You know, every six months you have a half birthday? Don’t you do that?”
“Can’t say I’ve heard of it.”
“Hmph. Must be another one of those things Mum made up so we could have family time. She does that a lot.”
“Might be a good tradition to continue.” Cole picked up the box of ashes and began to scan the surroundings. “Right. Let’s get this thing done then.”
“Any ideas where?”
He pointed to the place where the waterfall cascaded into the pool. “There. That looks like the place.”
“Great.”
He opened the backpack he’d bought and pulled out a small portable CD player. It was old and covered in paint splatters but it would do the trick. And it was the only thing in his house that still ran on batteries. Essential if you were in the middle of nowhere.
“What’s that for?”
“Mood music. Phoebs asked me to play it.”
“Oh. Right. Well, you carry the ashes and I’
ll carry the ‘boom box’.” Olivia tittered, hoisting the thing onto her shoulder. “God, I feel like I should be wearing tiny underpants and prancing around in a rap video showing my bellybutton.”
Cole gave a faint smile. “Interesting thought.”
Leaving the picnic gear for later, they clambered over the rocks until they came to a large flat splay where Cole sat down. Olivia sat beside him, putting the CD player on the rock beside her.
Cole gripped the box. This was it. The time was right, the setting was perfect but now that he was here, he didn’t know if he was ready.
“Do you want to be alone?”
“No. I like it that you’re here. Stay.”
He sat for a moment longer, staring at the box.
“Do you want me to do it?” Olivia’s voice was soft, comforting.
“No. It’s fine. Press play.”
Olivia did as he asked. The air around them was filled with the sound of Norah Jones singing ‘Somewhere Over the Rainbow.’
Cole stood. He lifted the lid of the box and walked as close to the water as he could go without actually being in the water. A lump, like a baseball, choked in his throat. He felt as if his heart would break in two but it was too late because it already had. Raising his arm, he threw the ashes to the breeze watching as they fluttered and landed in the emerald splashes of the waterfall.
He sank to the ground, his head collapsing on his knees, his hands gripping it as if it would explode. Then he wept.
He wept until there were no more tears.
Chapter 31
“How can I tell him now?”
Mum and I were standing in the pram section of Babies R Us. We were looking at prams — clearly — but we weren’t getting very far towards purchasing one because Mum was insistent that it was bad luck to purchase a stroller before the baby was born. Along with not eating strawberries in case the baby was born with a birthmark and avoiding looking at animals in case the baby ended up looking like a monkey or some such, my mother had taken on every superstition in the book. She’d even stopped wearing heels for fear it would give the baby weak ankles. And as for not opening boxes… boy, she was taking it to the limit.