Falling In

by Stark, Avery

  “Um, it was going good.”

  Kim lowered back into her seat and motioned for Audrey to do the same in a chair just a foot or so away.

  “It was? What does that mean?”

  “I don’t know. It just seems like everything goes wrong no matter where I go. I can’t find a place where everything is just...right, I guess.”

  “Audrey, you’re never going to find that place because it doesn’t exist. Shit is bound to happen; you know that.”

  “But why does it always have to happen at once? You know that feeling, the one where you can’t get your head above water no matter how hard you paddle? I feel like that; like I’m out there in the ocean right now,” she said and pointed in its general direction. “Have you ever felt that way, Kim?”

  She looked concerned as she responded, “We all have, but in the end you’re either going to sink or swim and you’ve ever struck me as much of a sinker.”

  Audrey shook her head and looked through the window. The tall trees in the distance were barely visible and what she could see were the fattest branches as they began to defer to the wind’s increasing power. Leaves and even small pieces of grass fluttered by with the larger gusts. Some of them even formed their own tiny vortexes before they broke back up again and went on their way.

  She watched them carefully and did her best to keep it together.

  “I’m trying to swim, I really am.”

  A gust of wind outside of the house rushed through the patio’s wood beams and made a high-pitched howl that reminded Audrey of a wolf. She struggled to tell her the truth, but still couldn’t find the right way to say it.

  Kim grabbed her shoulders and pleaded, “Can you please just tell me what’s wrong?”

  Seeing her friend so concerned--remembering the look on Liam’s face when he handed her his phone--made the guilt too much for Audrey to bear. Here she was, carrying on and feeling sorry for herself while she spun a web of deceit that ended up taking more people down with her; people that she cared about a lot more than Max, when it came down to it.

  She was done hiding everything from everyone, even if that meant she had to woman up and admit that she was wrong.

  “I think I made a really big mistake,” she sighed and dropped her head in defeat.

  Kim forced her chin up and asked softly, “What did you do? Is this about Max?”

  “Yes and no.” She sank away from her friend’s touch and fell back onto the couch. “I’m done with him. I’m not going back.”

  “Good,” Kim said and sat down on the other end. “Then what’s the problem?”

  Audrey felt herself start to cry as she spoke, “It’s Liam I’m worried about.”

  “Liam?” She leaned back a little. “As in the Liam Stone that lives not far from here?”

  She nodded her head and wiped a few tears away. She was so lost in her own problems that she forgot the fact that Kim was still in the dark.. She didn’t know about their steamy affair or the heated fight that took place just hours before. True to the old adage, it really was a long story. And even if she could tell it from start to finish, Audrey wouldn’t ever be able to tell her friend why she did the things that she did. Sometimes the heart doesn’t give a reason.

  “What happened?”

  “I, I mean we,” her tongue tripped over its self. “I might’ve made him believe that I’m something that I’m not.”

  “And that is?”

  “Single,” Audrey sighed and sniffled. “I never told him about Max, not even after we had sex. He didn’t even find out until I accidentally sent something about the divorce to him.”

  Kim shook her head and asked, “And when was this?”

  “Yesterday,” she replied, unwilling to elaborate on their argument earlier.

  “Well I’ll have to agree. You fucked up, but that’s one of those life lessons that you can move on and learn from, like Max.”

  “No, it’s not like that, Kim. I can’t leave without talking to him again.”

  “You don’t have time for all that, girl.” She eyed her friend suspiciously. “Don’t tell me you’re in love with the guy.”

  Audrey brushed off her comment with a wave.

  “I need to make things right before I go, that’s all.”

  “I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but if you want to make it home any time in the next week, either we leave now or we don’t leave at all.” She wasn’t mean about it, but Audrey knew from the tone in her voice that she was completely serious. “Look, I need to know what you want to do. If I’m taking you to the airport, we have to go. Everyone is saying that departures will be stopped by midnight and we still need to get you a ticket on one of them.”

  Put on the spot yet again, Audrey felt helplessly torn. Every fiber of her being ached to run to Liam and apologize, but every part of her brain said that he probably wouldn’t even speak to her. Then she’d have to sit through a hurricane as her life finished its self-destruct sequence. While it seemed fitting, it wasn’t something that she was too eager to experience.

  All she wanted was to see him one more time, even if it meant risking a fate that threatened to do even more damage than the storm that loomed large.

  “Then we’re not going,” she said.

  Kim rubbed her temples and responded, “Are you sure about this? He’s just a guy, Audrey.”

  “Maybe,” she replied. “But I’m not leaving until I can tell him that I’m sorry. I don’t care if he never wants to speak to me again after that.”

  It wasn’t true, of course, but the intensity of her feelings for him was almost embarrassing. Surely her friend--and the rest of the outside world--wouldn’t understand, would they?

  “Okay,” Kim relented and threw both hands up into the air. “You win. But I hope you’re prepared for what you’re getting yourself into.”

  “With Liam?”

  “No,” her friend said and pointed to the window, where they could easily see the gathering blackness in the sky. “That’s a fuckin’ hurricane, not some snow storm that you can shovel your way out of. You’re going to have to contend with that, too.”

  “Add it to the pile,” she said and sank back onto the couch. “I need to do this.”

  Kim rolled her eyes as the phone screeched from inside her pocket.

  “Excuse me for a minute?”

  “Yeah, sure.”

  She hopped up from the couch and took the phone into the kitchen, which left Audrey alone to contemplate her choice. There was no way for her to know if Liam would accept anything that she had to say.

  Shit, she thought to herself, I’ll be glad if he doesn’t slam the door in my face.

  After a quick phone conversation, Kim came back into the room.

  “That was Morty. He runs the general store in town.”

  “Oh yeah. We spoke the other day.”

  She walked up and leaned on the back of the couch.

  “His grandsons are almost here. They’re going to help us.”

  Audrey turned around and whipped her loose locks to rest behind her shoulder as she asked, “Help us do what?”

  Kim chuckled and patted her shoulder, “Put on your work shoes. We have some boards to put up.”

  ---

  The sharp rattle of hammers and nails echoed through the tense air. Brian, David and Steve Sullivan--three brothers who shared the same brown hair, freckles and emerald eyes--each worked on a different side of the house, leaving the last one for Audrey and Kim. They kneeled together in front of a window on the lower level and sorted through an old coffee can full of nails.

  Most of the work was already done, but there was still a bit of a rush to finish. Some of the first outer bands of the hurricane started to pass over, dumping quick sheets of rain and then disappearing completely.

  Kim stood up and hoisted the board in to place. She called down to Audrey, who waited below with her hammer poised, “Go ahead.”

  She brought its heavy head down onto the nails that they picked
out, driving five in a row without missing a beat. It felt good to take everything out on those tiny slivers of metal as she pounded away without mercy. The winds around them picked up for a third time in an hour, but it did little to cool Audrey down. Heavy beads of sweat studded her brow, most of which eventually rolled down to the tip of her nose and dripped onto her dirty sneakers.

  “Thanks for helping,” Kim said and held the board in place with both hands to keep a gust from blowing it away.

  “No problem. I couldn’t just sit inside and let you guys do all the work.”

  “Well you could’ve, I guess.” She paused and eyed Audrey’s healing wrist. “If Liam doesn’t want to talk to you, can you at least promise me that you won’t go back to Max? You can stay here as long as you want if you don’t have anywhere else to go.”

  Her friend’s kindness forced a smile onto her face as she answered, “Kim, that’s one promise that I’m absolutely sure I can make.”

  Audrey stood up and hugged her, forgetting for a second that she was covered in sweat. But in that moment, it really didn’t matter. Kim squeezed her back just as tight.

  “You’re gonna be okay, kid. I know it.”

  Audrey pulled back and dabbed her moist eyes.

  “One way or another.”

  “Here,” Kim said. She dug around in her pocket and replaced Audrey’s hammer with a small key chain. “Take my car. There should be enough time for you to get back if you need to.”

  A sense of relief washed over her as she curled her fingers around the keys.

  At least they won’t be able to say that I died while riding a bike in a hurricane.

  Chapter 11

  Audrey flew around the porch, down the front stairs and eventually settled behind the wheel of Kim’s old station wagon. She slammed the heavy door shut and took off down the bumpy road that led off of the property while she did her best to remember which way to go in a town that was still mostly alien. Between that and the darkness that fell, she quickly started to wonder whether or not she should’ve left at all.

  Thankfully, she pulled up to Liam’s house just a couple of minutes--and a few wrong turns--later. She was still at a complete loss for what to say but even that didn’t matter anymore. All she needed was a chance.

  “Liam,” she called out and stumbled up to the front door, where she began to pound against the heavy wood. Most of the lights in the spacious home were out, which made her worry about whether or not she drove out there for nothing. “Are you there?”

  A gust of wind blew by that whipped her face with wet leaves and almost bowled her over. Audrey grabbed the door handle to stabilize herself just as it popped open. She stumbled into Liam’s house as she clawed the mushy debris off of her cheeks.

  “What are you doing? You do realize that that’s a hurricane out there, right?” He slammed the door shut and stood a few feet away with his arms crossed as he waited for an answer. “Audrey?”

  She pushed the hair out of her eyes and tried to smooth it down. When she met Liam’s reserved stare, the terrible pangs of guilt in her body intensified.

  “I wanted to tell you,” she said breathlessly. “I wanted to say all of it but things went so far, so fast that I didn’t even know where to start. I never planned to come down here and get attached and I certainly didn’t intend to hurt you.”

  Liam eyed her and adjusted his arms tighter around his stomach.

  “Okay.”

  “And I came all the way over here to say that I’m sorry. I’m probably flying back home once all of this passes and I couldn’t leave things with you the way they were.”

  He nodded his head but didn’t say anything. Although Audrey didn’t expect him to forgive and forget, his cold silence cut like a razor blade through her fragile spirit. Everything that needed to be said was laid bare and hung in the painful quiet that lingered between them. In the wake of it, she rested her shaking finger tips on the front door’s brass handle.

  “I’m sorry for coming like this,” she said and flung the door open.

  The first thing that hit was the powerful wind, which sustained enough speed to make Audrey nearly lose her footing as she ran out of Liam’s house. As soon as she started down the steps, a blinding flash of lightning popped not far away and was followed by a deep rumble that she could feel in her bones. Soon after, a deluge of rain fell as the skies opened up.

  Sheets of pouring rain fell from the black clouds and soaked through her hair in an instant. The warm, heavy drops covered her skin and washed away the salty layer of tears on her cheeks while a snap of lightning gave her just enough light to fumble with Kim’s keys. Night was officially in effect and it was, without a doubt, the blackest night that Audrey ever saw.

  She walked with arms stretched out in front of her, feeling along the car’s warm hood to guide herself around to the front.

  Liam grabbed Audrey’s wrist and spun her around. Once there, he pinned her body to the driver side window and cupped both sides of her face. Without an exchange of words, the two locked in a passionate kiss that told Audrey she was momentarily forgiven.

  The rain continued to pound down onto their locked lips while another bolt of lightning tore a path just over their heads.

  “Come inside,” he pulled away and yelled over the following clap of thunder. “You can’t go back now.”

  “I can make it. It’s okay.”

  He grabbed both of her hands.

  “This isn’t about time. You can’t go back because I’m not going to sit here and watch you walk out of my life. I won’t let you.”

  “But what about-”

  She was interrupted by another flash of lightning that lit up the hellish landscape. It was close enough to leave faint, fleeting impressions of spider webs in Audrey’s vision.

  “Fuck all that,” Liam said loudly over the pouring rain. “I can get over a lie, but I would never forgive myself if I let you go. Please come inside.”

  Audrey wrapped her arms around his neck and let him carry her around his waist as they marched back into his darkened home. Once they were out of the increasingly savage elements, Liam gently lowered her down to her feet and kissed her again. He wiped away the wind-whipped chunks of her golden hair with both hands.

  His tongue slipped over hers and his hands did the same. They moved over her glistening shoulders and sopping wet tank top. As their bodies huddled together more tightly, the water in their clothes was pressed out and made a pattering between them as the murky water formed a small puddle at their feet.

  Liam grabbed the bottom of her shirt, peeled it off and tossed it to the side without ever taking his eyes off of her heaving chest. With each deep breath that Audrey inhaled, her full breasts pushed closer to his silky lips as he leaned in to meet them half way.

  With small, slow kisses, he moved from her shoulder to her collarbone and then followed that until it left him between her soft peaks. Liam paused there to jerk down the straps of her bra, exposing her perky, rain-tickled nipples to his hot palms.

  Audrey felt like she was melting into him as she reached down and pulled off Liam’s shirt. It was heavy with water and made a soggy little splash when she threw it onto the floor. After that, she shimmied down his shorts and exposed the one part of him that she couldn’t forget. Even though it wasn’t her first time with him, her hands trembled with eager anticipation. Their relationship was different now. With the lingering burden of secrecy gone, every bump and tug made her feel closer to him.

  Liam went right back to her breasts and ran his tongue over each of her pink points, one at a time. His pace was almost painfully slow, but it was a hot, tingling kind of pain that made Audrey press her hips into him as she silently begged for more. She felt each of his hot hands cup her and squeeze from the bottom, lifting her to the tips of her toes with a soft moan.

  He released her breasts and slid his hands over her stomach. When he reached her hips, he kneeled down and carefully pulled down her dripping jeans. He stopped to
kiss a trail that followed them down to her knees. Audrey stepped out and ran her hands through Liam’s soft, wavy hair. Near the back, she grabbed a handful and squeezed.

  His face landed just beneath her belly button, where he continued the barrage of pecks. With two fingers, he hooked into her panties and pulled them down to her ankles.

  Audrey’s knees buckled as Liam pulled her waist toward his waiting tongue and licked the very edges of her sensitive folds. Feeling her legs about to give out, he stood up and kissed the side of her neck.

  “Come on,” he said and moved so that he stood behind her, his throbbing meat pressed into the small of her back. With both arms wrapped under hers, Liam cupped her breasts and pushed her toward his bedroom.

  The rest of the house was almost pitch-black. All of the home’s modern storm shudders were latched tightly shut and most of the lights were off in anticipation of the inevitable blackout. In their place, battery-powered candles flickered from random shelves and tables. It gave each room a differing set of shadows that evoked something new.

  Audrey reached behind and cupped his hot neck in her hands. From there, she could feel the passing twinges and tugs of his muscles as he moved her into the bedroom and explored every inch of her naked body with his fingertips, groping her as if he was in slow motion. She yearned to have him again, but this time more than the first. Every nerve ending screamed for him; for a physical sign of his inner feelings.

  She bumped into a tall, wooden post at the foot of the bed and grabbed onto it as Liam’s warm hands slipped between her thighs and started to massage slowly upward. Audrey hung from the cool wood with both hands as his fingers slipped in from behind.

  “Oh god,” she cried and threw her head onto the post.

  She felt him inside of her, gently slipping in and out as she rocked her hips. His other hand crept up and tickled her soft breasts at the same time.

  Outside, the storm’s first real weather slammed into the house with a gust so powerful that both of them could feel the house as it shifted and groaned under the sudden change in pressure. Wind screeched through the cracks and spaces, causing a kind of screaming whistle that made goose bumps pop up from Audrey’s arms to her stomach.