by Kim Baldwin
Winterwolf, Alaska
“Megan Maxwell, please.” Chaz settled into the nearest comfy chair as she waited to be patched through to Megan. Finally.
She’d come straight to the pay phones in the lobby as soon as they hit the lodge, while Sally and their backpacking clients headed for hot showers and turns in the large outdoor hot tub.
“I’m sorry, Ms. Maxwell is in a meeting. May I take a message?”
Damn. “Yes, please. Would you tell her Chaz Herrick called and will try again later. She is also welcome to call me.” She recited the lodge’s phone number.
“I’ll give her the message,” the polite voice replied.
Chaz’s heart sank at having to wait any longer to talk to Megan than she already had. She’d been restless for days, impatient to hear Megan’s response to her letter.
Sighing, she headed toward her room, but Paul Bartlett, one of the lodge’s owners, hailed her from the front desk.
“Hey, Chaz! Got a letter here for you!”
Megan! She hurried to the desk and felt her spirits soar when she saw the Chicago postmark and WNC return address.
“Thanks, Paul.” She ripped open the envelope as she headed to her room, her hands trembling in anticipation of what she would find inside. A chance at happiness? Or a polite sorry, but not interested?
She sat on the bed and began reading.
Dear Chaz,
There are many things I really like about you. Foremost, at the moment, having just read your letter, I really like your courage and your straightforward honesty.
I feel the same, Chaz. I’m head over heels in love with you, too.
But I think it probably would have taken me a lot longer to admit it.
I’m buried in work here, but I can’t stop thinking about you. (And, yes, most certainly about that night. And you’re one to talk about stamina!)
You’ve shaken up my life a lot more than you know. In a good way.
I can’t wait to talk to you. See you. Touch you. Kiss you. Hold you. Taste you.
Uh, oh. Maybe I shouldn’t be writing this at work.
Call me.
I miss you terribly.
Megan
Chaz leaned back against the headboard of the bed with a contented smile. Now we just have to figure out a way to be together as often as possible. She could access her fall class schedule online. I’ll take a shower and then e-mail that to Megan so she can compare it to hers and see when we can get together. Then I’ll grab a bite to eat and try calling her again. She had to keep busy. The minutes until she could try phoning again would absolutely drag.
At least I can talk to her every day once I get home from guiding. But these weeks until then are going to be torture.
Chaz tried Megan again an hour later. “Ms. Maxwell, please,” she said when Megan’s assistant answered.
“Ms. Maxwell is in a meeting. May I ask who’s calling?”
“This is Chaz Herrick. I tried earlier, and—”
“Oh! Ms. Herrick, yes! Ms. Maxwell left instructions that you were to be forwarded through to her if you called back. Please hold and I’ll connect you.”
Chaz’s heart picked up in anticipation.
“Hello, this is Megan. Chaz? You there?” There was a lot of noise in the background, like Megan was in a crowded room with a lot of people talking.
“Yes, I’m here.” Finally! “God, have I missed you…” Chaz got half of it out, but Megan was talking over her before she finished.
“I’ve missed you so much! I was worried I was going to miss your call.”
“I caught you at a bad time, didn’t I?” Chaz asked.
“No! Hang on! I’m heading to my office so I can have a little privacy, but don’t hang up. I don’t want to lose you.”
“Don’t worry, I won’t.”
The sounds behind Megan diminished. “So…that’s better. How are you?”
“Good. I’m good, now that I’m talking to you. This week has just crawled.”
“Tell me about it.” Megan laughed.
“Thank you for your letter,” Chaz said.
“Well, thank you for yours.”
There was a short embarrassed silence, then the two of them began laughing.
“Let’s not waste our precious phone time being shy with each other now,” Chaz said. “I mean, considering what we did to each other…in every conceivable position—”
“Oh, God, you can’t do that to me.” Megan stopped her. “I’m at work, and I have meetings in a while. I’m supposed to be all cold and bossly, and here you’re going to make me all mushy and warm inside. My staff won’t know me.”
“I can’t be held responsible for how your voice enchants me.”
“Damn, you’re a smooth talker, Chaz Herrick.”
“So I take it you’re all healed up? Everything’s all right?” Chaz asked.
“If you were here, I’d ravish you in all those ways we couldn’t in the tent,” Megan said, in a breathy, seductive voice.
Chaz felt a sharp twist of arousal at the juncture of her thighs. “Jesus, Megan. Now who’s being provocative? I’m in the lobby of the lodge!”
“Oh, am I getting you all hot and bothered?” Megan asked in the same sexy voice. “Does it show? Are people watching?”
“Stop that!” Chaz was really heating up now, and starting to fidget. She glanced around. No one in sight at the moment, but that could change at any time. “You’re a cruel woman.” But the playful banter and the effect that Megan had on her body, even long distance, only reinforced the growing attraction between them.
“Oh, I think you like it,” Megan murmured. “In fact, you like it a lot. You sure liked it when I teased you that night, remember?”
“You could make a fortune as a phone-sex provider, not that I’m advocating a change of careers for you,” Chaz said. She felt light-headed, not surprising since all her blood was traveling south a mile a minute.
“You think so?” Megan said. “Well, maybe as a hobby. Just for one exclusive client.”
“Is that an offer?”
“Oh, I think we’re going to have to find all sorts of creative ways to get through the long periods when we can’t be together. Do you have a webcam?” Megan asked.
“A webcam? No,” Chaz answered.
“Get one as soon as you get home,” Megan said. “They’re really cheap now, and they really are the next best thing to being there. At least then we can see each other when we talk.”
“Oh! That would be great.”
“Yes, and let me tell you right off the bat I thoroughly encourage you to wear as little as possible when we chat.”
Chaz laughed. “Hmm, well, I’m beginning to see the possibilities here.”
“Thought you might. So when are we going to be able to get together? Have you looked at your schedule?”
“I e-mailed it to you a while ago.”
“Great. Hey, I can maybe get away for a long weekend over Labor Day. How about you?”
“Can’t. I’ve got some departmental meetings then—curriculum development for the coming year.”
“Damn.”
Chaz could hear the disappointment in Megan’s voice. “Sorry. How about Thanksgiving?”
“November is sweeps month—our most important rating period. I can’t get away that month at all.” Megan groaned.
“Christmas?”
“Christmas I can definitely do. But damn! That’s so far away!”
“I know.”
They both went quiet. Much of the enthusiasm they had built up with their flirting deflated with the realization they wouldn’t see each for five more months.
“You sure you want to pursue this, knowing how tough it’s going to be?” Megan asked in a quiet voice. “How long before we see each other again?”
“I’m absolutely certain,” Chaz affirmed. “I meant what I said, Megan. I know how incredibly difficult it’s going to be to have a relationship with you, with all the strikes against it.
But I feel something for you that I’ve never felt before. I have to try to see where that can lead. I will always regret it if I don’t.”
Megan sighed. “I’m glad. It’s the same for me, Chaz. I want to do whatever it takes. Even if it’s a long while until we can truly be together the way we want to be.”
“We’re sure going to become extremely patient people, I think,” Chaz said.
“Or experts at phone sex,” Megan answered wryly.
Chicago, Illinois
Megan had to settle for long, similarly frustrating phone calls every week or so during the next month and a half, while Chaz was leading trips. In between, they exchanged long letters and e-mails, filling the other in on the bits and pieces of their lives: family and upbringing, schools and pets, friends and jobs. They were happy to find they had many more things in common than they knew: politics, movies, books, music. Ethics and morals. A deep concern for the environment.
With every written exchange and telephone call, they further cemented the bond between them. But talking by webcam once Chaz returned to Fairbanks was both a blessing and a curse, because seeing each other without being able to touch was the most excruciatingly frustrating torture.
By mid-September, Megan knew it would never be enough.
It wasn’t a startling revelation. She didn’t wake up one morning and decide that things had reached critical mass. There was just a nagging discontent with her life as it was, and a growing realization that what mattered most in her life were those long talks with Chaz in the evening.
Something had to give.
Chapter Nineteen
Fairbanks, Alaska
Chaz stared out of the window of her office, in the general direction of Denali. It was a view she never tired of, but her mind was entirely on Megan. It was 3:00 p.m. in Alaska, which meant it was 6:00 p.m. in Chicago, and Megan would likely be headed home about now. Chaz often paused in her daily routine to glance at the clock and imagine what Megan might be doing at that moment. She had also begun to watch the news more often than ever before, because she knew if a major story broke that Megan would be unavailable for a while.
Her last class of the day, Mammology, didn’t start for half an hour, and she was restless. It was as though the only time she felt entirely happy now—completely whole and content—was during those moments she was talking to Megan. Swiveling in her chair to face her desk, Chaz picked up a framed five-by-seven photo of the two of them together that Sally had taken. She had a second copy beside her bed at home.
Unbeknownst to either of them at the time, Sally had captured that moment on the hilltop above the caribou herd when she had very nearly kissed Megan. From looking at the picture—their expressions, their faces close together—it would have been hard to believe they hadn’t kissed a moment after the photo was taken.
Seeing it set off a visceral, involuntary reaction within her body, a warm rush of feeling as it recalled the heat of Megan’s kisses. There was just no way she could wait until Christmas to be with her.
“You’re sure somewhere else,” Gareth Rosenberg said from the doorway. “You have a melancholy look on your face, my friend. Everything all right?”
Chaz leaned back in her chair and didn’t answer immediately. You have to spend some real time with her. “How upset would you be with me if I asked to take a sabbatical?”
Gareth frowned. “Is something wrong, Chaz? Not sick or anything?”
“No, nothing like that,” she hastened to reassure him. “I’m fine. I just have some personal things that need my attention, and I will probably need some time off to do them.”
“How long are we talking?”
“I’m not sure. Maybe a year.”
“And you’d want to start right away? Next term?” he asked.
“Yes. I think so.” Probably would be wise to get Megan’s input on this. I certainly hope she’ll be up for me coming to Chicago for a while.
“Well, of course you can have whatever time you need. I’ll just be anxious to get you back. We need you around here, you know.”
“Thanks, Gareth.” She glanced at the clock. “I’ll have a better idea of my plans in a day or so, I think.” She gathered up some papers on her desk and got to her feet. “Gotta head to class. Going my way?”
“You bet.”
Her last class of the week was her least favorite. Not that she wasn’t enthusiastic about the subject; she loved talking about the wildlife of Alaska, and she had some great new photos from her summer trips to show the class. But this was a required class, so it was held in one of the large impersonal lecture halls, and every time she handed out a test she had 168 papers to grade. Her other classes were all small enough that she could get to know each student somewhat during the course of a term.
The stacked tiers of seats were only half filled when she arrived; students were still filing in from two sides so she busied herself getting her materials ready.
Today on the big screen that dominated the front of the room, the students would be treated to 400 or so breathtaking photos that Chaz had shot during her countless trips, alone and as a guide. She had close-up shots of all the major mammals that populated the state, including some of the more reclusive: polar bears and grizzly bears, wolves and wolverines, lynx.
“Hi, everybody. If we can settle into seats, please,” she asked to get the stragglers moving. “I’d like to pick up where we left off—chapter 10. Today I’m going to be talking about the magnificent mammals that inhabit this great state.”
She flicked the switch that lowered the lights above the students and turned on the digital projector. “First up is Ursus arctos horribilis…or our friend the Alaska grizzly bear…”
The ninety-minute class flew. Perhaps she had brought a few too many photos. Or maybe she had paused a bit too long on the ones she’d taken of the caribou herd that summer, because those photos always reminded her of Megan. Before she knew it, the time was nearly up, and she still had pictures left to show.
“I’m going to just let the slide show play out here, to give you all a look at the rest of what I brought,” she said. “But I’ll stop now…in case anyone has any questions? Comments?”
There were four.
The first was a query about where musk ox could be found.
The second, a compliment of her excellent photography skills, drew a smattering of applause from other students.
The third asked when midterms were.
She thought that was all. In fact, she had already begun to hear that pervasive rustling that was the sound of students gathering up belongings to leave, when a familiar voice rang out from the dark last row.
“Ever come face to face with a grizzly bear?”
She was stunned into silence.
A long moment passed. The rustling had stopped and the room was quiet. The students were all watching her intently.
“Yes,” she replied, a smile twitching at the corner of her mouth. “Once.”
There was dead silence in the room.
“But there’s not time to tell that story today.” This elicited a loud groan from at least three-fourths of the class, but she stepped to the wall switch and turned the lights back up, saying, “See you all next week.”
Megan was seated in the dead center of the last row. She remained where she was, staring at Chaz with a positively beaming smile on her face, as students got up all around her and filed out. Finally, once they were alone, she rose and made her way forward, her eyes never leaving Chaz’s.
Chaz’s breath caught in her throat. Oh, God. Megan had never been more stunning. Like she stepped off the cover of a magazine. Hair shining, eyes glowing. Lips full and moist. She was wearing a pair of dark gray dress slacks, topped with a red silk blouse and charcoal sweater.
Megan slinked slowly toward her. Until she got to within a few feet—then she flew into Chaz’s arms and hugged her with a fierceness that took her breath away.
“You’re really here,” Chaz said, inhaling the
herbal fragrance of Megan’s perfume.
“Indeed I am. In the flesh.” Megan drew back from their embrace to look her in the eyes. “And very anxious to be alone with you. I think you’re done for the day, aren’t you?
“How are you here?” Chaz was still in shock. “How long are you here, more importantly?”
“I’m here on assignment,” Megan answered. “I’ve got at least a couple of weeks.” She pointed to a small suitcase, shoved beneath a row of coat hooks along one wall. “That’s mine. Know a place I can stay?”
“Oh, boy, do I ever.”
A minute later, they were in the vast parking lot. It was only mid-October, but it was already white as far as the eye could see.
“Didn’t you tell me you lived quite a ways out of town?” Megan asked as they climbed into Chaz’s big pickup truck.
“Forty miles.”
“There is absolutely no way I can wait that long to kiss you.”
Chaz started toward her at once, but Megan still managed to meet her halfway.
Their lips pressed together, softly at first—tentatively, reacquainting after nearly four months apart. Then their too-long-denied heat for each other took hold and ignited the kiss into a scorching, hungry exchange.
“Jesus,” Chaz said shakily when they parted to breathe. “We’ll never make it to my place.”
“Yes, we will.” But Megan was breathing heavily, too, and her lips were bruised and tender. “I’ll be good.” She leaned back into her seat and buckled her seatbelt, while she gestured with her head for Chaz to do the same. “Once we really get started, you know we won’t be able to stop. So you better get this truck going before I lose my resolve not to touch you until we get there.”
Chaz fumbled the key into the ignition and got the pickup moving. For the first time ever, she wished she lived a hell of a lot closer to town. She kept glancing in Megan’s direction. “You’re going to have to stop looking at me like that, Megan.”
“Like what? How am I looking at you?” Megan’s sexy tone indicated she knew damn well what she was doing.