Wheels of Grace

by Crosse, Tania

  Grace had to avert her eyes. Poor Nan. Grace hardly held John in high esteem, but she wouldn’t wish him killed on the battlefield. And he was Nan’s husband, whatever she thought of him.

  Grace glanced across at her mother, suddenly aware that little Jonty had stopped crying. Temperance was rocking back and forth in her chair, crooning softly to the child as he sucked on the crooked little finger she had offered him. She lifted her head and Grace saw the radiant, golden smile that lit her face.

  ‘There now. I think this little fellow deserves a proper feed now, doesn’t you?’

  She stood up and went across to Nan, waiting patiently while the young woman, feeling she couldn’t disobey, unbuttoned her blouse. An instant later, Jonty was guzzling noisily at his mother’s breast, Temperance gazing down at them in contented satisfaction. Grace observed her, a kernel of hope unfurling in her own heart.

  ‘I’m so sorry I’m late, Martha. I were just finishing something off in the workshop. Oh.’ Grace stopped short, glancing about the low-ceilinged room. ‘Where’s Mummy?’

  ‘She’m gone home,’ Martha answered enigmatically.

  ‘Home? On her own?’

  ‘Yes. She wanted to surprise you.’

  ‘Well, she’s certainly done that.’ And as a gripping concern overtook Grace’s thoughts, she asked anxiously, ‘Is she all right?’

  ‘I should say so, yes.’

  Grace’s forehead corrugated in bemusement. Certainly if Martha wasn’t worried, then Grace was convinced. But Martha herself didn’t appear her usual self.

  ‘And is everything all right with you, Martha?’

  The older woman sucked in her lips. ‘Well … yes and no,’ she faltered, sitting down at the table with a thump. ‘Us had a letter from our daughter-in-law this morning. Our Stanley’s been wounded. And he’ll be invalided out of the army. You see, he’s … lost an arm. His left one, so it might’ve been worse.’

  Grace tried to stifle a sharp intake of breath. Stanley was the youngest of Martha and Barry’s elder three boys and Grace had known him well. She had been about twelve when he had married and moved away to take up a job as farm labourer with a tied cottage. But it wasn’t all that far and he visited on occasion with his young family, so it wasn’t as if he was a vague figure from Grace’s past. And anything that affected her dear friend affected her, too. ‘Oh, Martha, that’s awful!’

  ‘Is it, though, cheel?’ Martha’s distraught gaze locked onto hers. ‘At least he’m alive, and he’ll be coming home. Though how he’m supposed to support a wife and three tackers with only one arm, I doesn’t know.’

  ‘Won’t he get some sort of invalid pension from the government?’ Grace put in optimistically.

  ‘Aw, I doesn’t know about that. Susan don’t mention it in her letter. But it’s not your problem.’ Martha slapped her thighs as she stood up. ‘Now you get on home and see what your mam’s bin up to.’

  ‘Yes, I will.’ Grace planted a kiss on Martha’s cheek. ‘And let me know if there’s ort I can do. Heaven knows you’ve done enough for us.’

  ‘Bless you, cheel,’ Martha smiled back, looking more like her old self.

  Grace took the few steps to her parents’ front door with a pensive frown. So, Martha almost welcomed the fact that one of her sons had lost an arm in the fighting. She looked upon it as his salvation. Dear Lord, the world had gone mad.

  But Grace put the thought to the back of her mind as she opened the door to the tiny cottage. A delicious aroma wafted into her nostrils, mingled with the distinctive smell of ironing. She was astounded to see that her mother was half way through the pile of laundry she had expected to be tackling herself that afternoon, and a large pot of stew was simmering on the range.

  Temperance looked up when she saw her and gave a proud smile. ‘Thought I’d give you a surprise. Been sitting round on my laurels long enough. Relying on you to do everything when you’ve enough on your plate. And I’s certain they could do with you full time at the yard.’

  Grace’s jaw fell open in amazement. Since Nan’s desperate visit a couple of weeks ago, Temperance had been far more communicative and had busied herself doing minor tasks about the cottage. But to see her suddenly taking on again the entire running of the home was quite a shock.

  ‘B-but I were going to do that this afternoon,’ Grace stammered.

  ‘Well, I won’t say no to some help. And later on, you can take over while I nip down to Nan’s for a while. Poor girl could do with a hand, I’ll be bound. Being left on her own with four chiller all under school age must be master hard on her. Put some extra carrots and onions in the stew I did to make it go further so I’ll take some down to her, and all.’

  Grace continued to stare at Temperance, her mouth dropping open even further. It was a miracle, and it had taken John’s disappearance to inspire it. God certainly did move in mysterious ways sometimes!

  ‘There’s nothing stopping you now, Gracie,’ Larry said sombrely.

  Grace had been concentrating on chiselling a perfect dovetail joint. It didn’t actually need to be perfect, but Geoffrey had said it would be good practice for her and George. They were having a competition to see who could produce the finest result in the shortest time, so Grace was more than a little irritated that Larry had come to disturb her, while George worked on with a conspiratorial grin as Larry winked at him.

  ‘Stop me doing what?’ she demanded crisply, pausing to blow away the minuscule wood shavings.

  ‘Becoming a VAD. You said it’s what you’d really like to do. Or are you exercising your woman’s prerogative to change your mind?’

  Grace’s eyes flashed at him. ‘No, I’m not,’ she retorted. ‘I’d still love to do it, only I can’t afford it, as you know jolly well. So kindly stop mocking me and let me get on with this.’

  Larry stood back with a short laugh, his hands in the air. ‘As you wish. But I thought you might be interested in what I have to say.’

  ‘What? You’re determined to make me lose, aren’t you?’

  ‘No, but that’s not important. Come outside for a minute, Grace,’ Larry said persuasively, taking her gently by the elbow. ‘That’s really good, George, by the way. Better than Grace’s.’

  She opened her mouth in protest, but then noticed the teasing light in Larry’s chestnut eyes. And perhaps he really did have something to discuss with her, so she allowed herself to be propelled outside. Larry walked her to the little bridge and perching on the low parapet, invited her to do the same.

  ‘So, what’s so urgent you have to ruin my chances of winning our little competition?’ she wanted to know.

  Larry paused infuriatingly as he wet his lips. ‘Well, it really is about training as a VAD nurse,’ he said at last. ‘That’s if you do still want to do it.’

  Grace drew in a breath and released it in a steady stream. She recognized when Larry was being serious. ‘Yes, I would. It’s so awful what some of those men have been through, and I really think I could help.’

  ‘So do I.’

  ‘Do you? But how can I?’ she sighed. ‘I could barely afford the uniform, let alone be able to support myself.’

  ‘No. But I could.’

  There was a stunned silence during which Grace wondered if she wasn’t dreaming, but then Larry went on, ‘Look at it this way, Gracie. Your mother’s found her feet again, even helping Nan so much, so you’re free to do whatever you want. I know you give most of your wages to your family, but I could make that up as well. And before you ask, yes, I can afford it. The business will all be mine one day. But until it is, I get my share of the profits. Not a huge amount, it has to be said, but until I have a wife and family of my own, I’ve little to spend it on. And that’s unlikely ever to happen. I mean, who’d ever have me with this wretched leg? So, if you think you could cope with all the dreadful things you’re likely to see, I can’t think of a more worthwhile thing to do with my money.’

  Grace had been listening to him, a thread of intangible
excitement tangling itself into a knot in her belly. Did she have inside her what was needed to help those poor souls? But as her mind drifted back over what she had seen, her heart strengthened with determination.

  ‘But … don’t you need me here? In the workshop?’

  ‘Yes. But I’m sure we can get round it somehow. Gladys and Elsie are gems, and George is getting on so well. I know he’s been with us less than a year, but he’s a complete natural. And I think it would be good for Mother to do the paperwork. She used to, you know, back along.’

  Grace met his level gaze, watching his eyes crease slightly at the corners. Larry, whom she would trust with her life. ‘And you’d do all that for me?’

  ‘Yes, I would.’

  ‘But … why?’

  ‘Because I can,’ he answered, his voice deep and low. ‘And because I believe you can. I’ve watched you with your mother and your own brothers and sisters. With Nan and her brood. Some people are meant to be carers, and you’re one of them, Grace. And with Martin. You understood. And it’s because of him, too. In his memory.’

  Grace looked into his eyes, saw the moisture collecting against the lower lids. And felt her own eyes mist over.

  ‘Then I shall write to Mrs Franfield,’ she announced determinedly. Somewhere inside her, a little bird fluttered its wings.

  CHAPTER SIXTEEN

  ‘WELL DONE, NURSE Dannings,’ Sister Guscott beamed. ‘Top marks in your exams once again.’

  Grace felt her chest swell with pride. It was six weeks since Mrs Franfield had welcomed her to Mount Tavy Hospital, offering her a bed in the former servants’ wing at the back of the house just along a passageway from the galleried landing and the stunning glass atriums in the roof. Six narrow beds had been placed in the room for the benefit of those who, like Grace, had nowhere else to live within a sensible distance. Grace was sharing with four other young women who had been volunteers for some while, and another who had arrived the day after Grace.

  ‘You were due here yesterday,’ Grace recalled Ling Franfield frowning at the girl as she waltzed into the grand hall. ‘I hope this isn’t going to be an example of your punctuality – or rather your lack of it. A hospital relies on strict time-keeping, you know.’

  ‘Sorry, Matron. My maid hadn’t finished packing my trunk.’

  ‘Well, I’m certain you won’t need the half of what’s in it. Leave it there and I’ll ask the porters to bring it up when they have a spare minute. Not that it’s their job to run around after nurses. You’ll be sharing with Nurse Dannings here – who arrived on time yesterday,’ Ling said pointedly, turning to Grace who was tired from her first day but still effervescent with excitement. ‘Just going for your break, Nurse Dannings?’

  ‘Yes, Matron,’ Grace answered, preening herself at being addressed as ‘nurse’ already. ‘Sister said I should go now.’

  ‘Well, would you mind taking Nurse Palmer here to the dormitory and showing her around, please? Obviously you can’t change into your uniform until your trunk is unpacked, Nurse Palmer, so you’ll have to come to tea in your civilian clothes.’

  The girl’s head retracted on her neck in offence at Ling’s sharp tone, and Grace mouthed the words Yes, Matron at her. Fortunately she appeared to latch on, repeating them aloud. Ling dipped her head as if satisfied, and headed off in the direction of the office.

  ‘Lordy-love, is she always as brusque as that?’

  ‘Oh, no,’ Grace replied, not quite sure how to take the newcomer. ‘She’m wonderful, really. But she expects everyone to be as efficient as she is.’

  ‘I’ll have to watch out, then,’ the girl winked, and held out her hand. ‘Selina Palmer.’

  ‘And I’m Grace. In private, anyway,’ Grace grinned back, warming to her as she led the way up the grand staircase. ‘There’ll be six of us sharing up here.’

  ‘Six? Well, I hope no one snores,’ Selina declared, scanning the room when they reached it. ‘And the bed’s like a block of granite,’ she pronounced, sitting down on the bare straw mattress.

  ‘You have to make it in a special way,’ Grace told her, nodding at the pile of bedding. ‘Same way as you make the patients’ beds. I’ll show you later. But first of all, we have twenty minutes for tea, and then I think I’ll be serving dinner to the men on my ward. And then after our own supper, it’s study time.’

  ‘No peace for the wicked, then?’

  ‘No, none at all!’ Grace laughed back.

  And so the two of them had started training together on Sunshine Ward, the one which accepted amputees and assessed their mental ability to cope, and was where Martin had been a patient. Being one of only two wards for those who were recovering from physical wounds, cleanliness was essential. For Grace, washing walls and floors and disinfecting cabinets and bedsteads came as second nature, but for Selina, who had never so much as lifted a duster in her life, it was a completely new and not altogether welcome experience.

  ‘Urgh, I think I’m going to be sick,’ she declared a few days later, coming into the sluice room with a used bedpan, and indeed began to retch.

  ‘Not great, is it?’ Grace sympathized, taking from her the offending item which she emptied and put to soak in disinfectant. ‘But just think how embarrassing it must be for the patient.’

  ‘That’s as maybe, but I don’t think I’ll ever get used to all the smells.’

  ‘Lucky you’m not out in the trenches, then,’ Grace observed grimly.

  ‘You can say that again! But come on, let’s get out of here.’

  ‘Why don’t you try to get hold of some peppermint oil and dab some on the inside of your collar? Then you can sniff at it when you’m dealing with bedpans.’

  ‘Oh, you’re a genius, Nurse Dannings! Hate these wretched starched collars, though, don’t you? Chafe your neck something rotten.’

  ‘Makes us keep our heads up and look dignified, Matron says, and she’s right, I reckon.’

  ‘Not so bad, is she, once you get to know her?’

  ‘I think she’s lovely. She were so good when my friend were a patient here. That’s what made me want to be a VAD.’

  ‘You’re a dark horse!’ Selina chuckled. ‘A male friend, I take it?’

  ‘Oh, nort like that. He were more like a brother. He weren’t an amputee, mind. He were wounded, but he recovered from that. He were here because he had mild shell-shock, I suppose you’d call it. Only …’ Grace paused as the flush of sorrow washed through her. ‘He were sent back to the Front and were killed in action soon after.’

  ‘Oh, my goodness, I’m so sorry. I shouldn’t have pulled your leg—’

  ‘You weren’t to know.’ Grace gave a wistful smile. ‘He were on Sunshine Ward, same as us. I think Matron wanted me to face those memories from the beginning.’

  ‘Talk of the devil,’ Selina whispered under her breath as a familiar figure came towards them.

  ‘Nurse Palmer, your cap still isn’t folded correctly. Get Nurse Dannings to show you again tonight.’

  ‘Yes, Matron. All very well for her to say so,’ Selina grumbled once Ling Franfield was out of earshot. ‘I bet she’s not as exhausted as we are by the end of the day. It’s all I can do to write up our notes for the day before I fall into that torture rack they call a bed.’

  ‘Oh, I don’t know. I reckon she gets just as tired. And did you know she and Dr Franfield have a son at the Front, and a daughter who’s a nurse and has just gone out to France? That must be such a dreadful worry. And Sister were telling me they have a younger son, too, William, who wants to be a doctor like his father. He’m at school during the week, but comes here at the weekends.’

  ‘Expect we’ll meet him, then. But come on. We’ve got one of the nicest parts of the day to look forward to, serving dinner and helping those who can’t manage on their own. I don’t mind doing that, and talking to the men. And helping with the painting sessions, I like doing that.’

  ‘It’s the best part, isn’t it, helping them relax and enjoy them
selves?’ Grace agreed as they entered Sunshine Ward again. And just for a second, she imagined she felt Martin’s ghost tap her approvingly on the shoulder.

  ‘Thank you very much, Sister,’ Grace replied proudly. She had indeed worked hard for all the tests she had been set in those six weeks. Basic nursing skills and anatomy weren’t strictly necessary for the volunteers on most of the other wards, but patients on Sunshine arrived with only partially healed wounds, and the VADs needed to have extra knowledge. But Grace relished in her studies and wanted to excel. It was like a fever with her, and she was astute enough to recognize why. Every bandage she applied perfectly, every question she answered correctly, paid homage to Martin and to Stephen. A tiny slither of grief removed from her heart. And she wanted to prove to dear Larry that his faith in her had been justified.

  ‘I wish Nurse Palmer had your ability and dedication,’ Sister Guscott sighed. ‘I really think we should consider moving her to a different ward, or even asking her to leave altogether. I’m not at all sure she has what it takes. And we’ll need everyone up to scratch. Heaven knows what injuries the poor lads will have who’ll be coming through to us from this new offensive we’re hearing about.’

  ‘Near Ypres, a place called Passchendaele, you mean?’

  ‘Something like that, yes. Read the papers a lot, don’t you, Nurse?’ Sister observed quite impressed.

  ‘When I can find the time. I used to follow events with Larry. Martin’s … Lieutenant Vencombe’s brother.’

  ‘Ah, yes. I was so very sorry to hear what happened to young Martin. None of us considered he should have been sent back to the Front. But sadly, that’s war. And why I for one will be glad when it’s over and I can go back to civilian nursing. But in the meantime, I’m mighty glad you were allocated to me. You might have been sent to Sister Hammett.’

  Grace had to suppress a smile. She much preferred homely Sister Guscott, the nursing sister Dr Franfield had purloined from Tavistock Cottage Hospital to help set up this auxiliary military establishment. Sister Hammett was officially the Superintendant of the voluntary detachment, and from what Grace had seen of her, was much more fearsome.