by Morse, Jody
“So, what are these rules, exactly?” Thane questioned.
“I’ll make them up as I go along,” Johnny said, as though it should have been obvious. “Now, the first order of business is going to be who you answer to. I know you might be tempted to question your friends or your former Alpha when you have questions about things. I don’t want any of that, though. I don’t even want you asking my mate questions.”
“Hey, why not?” Charlotte asked, glancing over at him sharply. “Don’t you trust me?”
“Of course I trust you, baby. It’s just that I want to be the one who tells them what to do. I don’t want them to think it’s okay to find things out from anyone but me, even though I love you.” He turned to the rest of us. “If I need you to be here, then you need to fucking be here, you understand? I might wake you up in the middle of the night if our pack is under attack, but if I do, then you can’t just go back to sleep. You need to show up as soon as you can, no matter where you are or what you’re doing.”
He moved onto his next point. “Secondly, we all go to same school. That means that, eventually, we’re going to have to start hanging out with each other. If people are going to know that we’re all friends, then none of you are to do anything that could possibly embarrass our pack.”
Johnny’s eyes fell on me, and I gulped. Why did he think I would embarrass him? Was it because Charlotte had said something about me, or was it because he knew, somehow, that I had been the one who always embarrassed Akar? I wasn’t sure if I really wanted to know everything that had been said about me, but I did wish I was invisible at that moment—especially when Charlotte followed Johnny’s gaze and twisted her lips into a slight smile.
“Finally, I want you all to be cautious about which humans you interact with. I don’t want you to associate with anyone who could possibly put two and two together about us, and, even more importantly, I don’t want you to tell anyone that we’re wolves. I don’t know what things were like in Alaska for you, but here, we’re private about what we are.” He paused for a moment before continuing.
“There may come a time when we choose to expand our pack. When that happens, we won’t tell the person what we’re going to do. It will be a surprise to them when we bite them. And if any of you are thinking about dating humans, then I want you to think again. Dating a human carries huge risks—ones that, as your Alpha, I’m not comfortable with you taking. This is a rule. Now, if you can hear another human’s thoughts and you’re positive they’re your mate, then, by all means, bite them. We can use extra pack members. Otherwise, stay the hell away. The last thing we need is a bunch of wolves who are angry they’re wolves, just because you thought they might be your mate.”
Again, Johnny glanced over in my direction, and I had a feeling that he somehow knew about Gage. I wasn’t sure who had told him or why, but it really irritated me. If I was going to meet my mate here, then wasn’t it my business who I wanted to date? And, truthfully, his telling me that I couldn’t date a human only made me want to do it more.
Chapter 26
Later that night, I was in the kitchen doing the dishes. The twins and Ashton had already gone to bed for the night, exhausted from roughhousing after the pack meeting. Akar was outside and, even though I knew that was normal for him, I couldn’t help but be worried, too. I hoped that losing his spot as Alpha hadn’t hit him too hard and that the conversation I’d overheard about him killing Johnny didn’t actually mean anything.
Just as I finished drying the last of the dishes, Thane cleared his throat from behind me, scaring the crap out of me.
“I didn’t know you were there,” I said, clutching my hand to my chest shakily.
“Sorry. I didn’t mean to scare you.” He paused for a few moments, gazing at me. “I heard your thoughts tonight.”
I groaned. “Of course you did. You always hear my thoughts. I need to find a way to just stop thinking.” Yeah, right. It seemed like my thoughts didn’t turn off at all lately.
“You can’t meet up with Gage tomorrow night,” Thane insisted. “I know you want to, but…you can’t.”
I met his eyes. “I can do whatever I want, Thane. You can’t tell me what I can and can’t do.”
“I know, but I can’t help it. Someone needs to look out for you. Clearly, you’re not thinking about your own safety—or Gage’s safety, for that matter.”
“Gage will be fine,” I insisted.
“Did you even pay attention to Johnny’s threat tonight? If he finds out about you and Gage—if he doesn’t already know—then he might kill him.” He swallowed hard before adding, “He might kill both of you.”
I sighed. As much as I wanted to tell Thane he was making a big deal out of nothing…I knew that he was right. “So, what do you suggest I do, then?”
“I suggest that you stop hanging out with him,” Thane replied bluntly. “I don’t want anything to happen to you. And, even though I don’t really like Gage, I don’t want you to do anything to put him at risk.”
“How can you say you don’t like him when you’ve never even spoken to him?” I questioned, just as a realization hit me. Thane wasn’t actually concerned about my safety or Gage’s safety at all. He was jealous that I was going to be having my first date—even if it wasn’t going to be just the two of us—the next night.
It was obvious that Thane heard my thoughts, because his eyes softened. “Is that really what you think? That I’m just jealous?”
I nodded. “It makes sense. You think I’m your mate, so obviously you wouldn’t want me hanging out with Gage.”
Thane swallowed hard. “This goes way deeper than the way I feel for you, Skye. If Johnny finds out—”
“If Johnny finds out, I’ll deal with it, okay?” I said, my voice elevating. “Just answer me honestly. Are you jealous?”
“Of course I’m fucking jealous, Skye! Do you know how hard it is for me to think about you with someone besides me?” Thane questioned. “I’m in love with you. I’ve always been in love with you.”
“I know,” I whispered, glancing away from him.
“Do you love me, Skye?” Thane asked quietly. When I glanced up at him, his honey brown eyes were pouring into mine.
“Y-yes, I do,” I replied hesitantly. “But that doesn’t mean that—” I started to say, but before I had a chance to get my words out, his lips were on mine, parting my mouth with his tongue.
I thought about pushing him away at first, but then I gave into his kiss completely. I didn’t feel the same spark I felt as I did when I kissed Gage, but there was something about Thane’s kiss that consumed me completely. There was a roughness to it that I’d never felt before, but at the same time, it was soft and gentle.
My heart raced against my chest and I was breathless when I finally managed to pull away from him. “Just because I love you doesn’t mean that we can be together right now,” I told him quietly, avoiding his gaze.
“Are you freaking kidding me? After that…,” Thane said, I knew he was referring to the kiss. “You’re going to still go out with Gage?”
“I don’t know what I’m going to do,” I told him honestly. “But that’s ultimately up to me to decide.”
He scoffed. “I can’t even believe this. You’re so freaking selfish sometimes, Skye.”
“I’m sick of you calling me selfish,” I replied, my voice breaking a little as I tried to hold back the tears that had rushed to my eyes.
“Well, you should stop being selfish, then.” Thane shook his head disgustedly. “It’s not even about you hurting me anymore. It’s about the fact that the two of you might die. And if you die, I’ll be lost without you, Skye.” He sighed. “I can’t just sit back and watch you make stupid mistake after stupid mistake with him, just because you finally have the chance to be independent.”
“I’m not making stupid mistakes!” I yelled, even louder this time. “And you need to just butt out of my life! There’s nothing you can do to stop me from seeing Gage.”
“Wanna bet
?” Thane shot back. He looked like he wanted to say something more, but, with his nostrils flaring, he rose to his feet and stomped out of the kitchen.
I leaned over the kitchen island, trying to stay calm, even though I wanted to scream. It sounded like Thane was threatening me, but…what was he planning to do? What could he do? I wasn’t sure. If only I could listen in on his thoughts the way he could hear mine. Ugh.
“Skye? Is everything okay?” Hunter asked from behind me.
I turned around and glanced at him. I forced a smile. “Yeah, everything’s fine.”
“Are you sure?” Chance asked. “We heard Thane yelling at you. We can kick his ass, if you want us to.”
“That’s okay, guys. I think I’m gonna go for a walk. Go back to sleep.”
Chapter 27
As I slipped out the back sliding glass door and into the warm night, I noticed that even though it was really dark out, the moonlight casted over the backyard enough for me to make out the path to the woods behind our house. Maybe that was what had caused this argument with Thane tonight. The full moon makes werewolves act even crazier than humans.
Once I was within the confines of the thick forest, far enough away that Clyde and Gladys wouldn’t notice me if they happened to be looking out the window, I made the transition from human to wolf. The orange smoke danced around me as I changed.
Stretching my legs out, I walked through the woods, crunching over dried leaves and twigs. I was about half a mile in the woods when I saw Akar sitting on the ground, staring up at the full moon. He looked almost just like Thane from behind with his white fur, but Akar sat taller.
“What are you doing out here so late, Skye?” Akar questioned, without even turning around to face me.
As I approached him, I asked, “How did you know it was me out here?”
“No one will ever believe me if they hear what I have to say, so if I tell you this, you need to promise me that you’ll keep it to yourself.” He glanced over at me, his light eyes glinting under the moon.
Something about this moment made me feel…different. It seemed like Akar was really opening up to me again. Was this the beginning of a friendship for us? “I promise I won’t say anything to anyone else,” I agreed.
“Even though I’m not your Alpha anymore, I can still hear your thoughts sometimes. Only when you forget to block people from hearing them, that is.”
I glanced over at him, surprised. “What do you think that means?”
“Honestly?” Akar met my gaze. “I think it means that my run as Alpha isn’t officially over yet.”
I gulped. Was he about to admit to me that he was going to kill Johnny? Or what if he’d already killed him? Even though I was happy that Akar trusted me enough to tell me things he wasn’t comfortable with telling the rest of the pack, I really didn’t want to have to carry around a secret like that. Because, even worse than knowing that my new Alpha was going to die, it would mean that I would be an accessory to his death.
I couldn’t do that.
“Relax, Skye. I didn’t kill Johnny, and I’m not thinking about killing him, either,” Akar replied, snorting. “I don’t want to hurt anyone. Though, it’s nice to know that you wouldn’t have my back if I actually did want to.” He paused for a moment before explaining, “I think that fate has something in store for him already. I have a feeling that someone’s going to kill him. Whether it will be accidentally or intentionally, I don’t know. But, when that happens, I think I’ll be given back the role of Alpha.”
“So, you think that Johnny was chosen as a temporary Alpha placeholder, then,” I said.
“Basically.”
I considered his theory for a few moments. The whole idea seemed sort of far-fetched. “Can you hear everyone’s thoughts? Or just mine?”
“Just yours, but…” He trailed off.
“But what?”
“To be honest, your thoughts are the only ones I actually cared to listen in on since I became Alpha…especially since we moved here,” Akar explained. “I mean, think about it, Skye. Listening in on Chance and Hunter’s thoughts always gave me a headache. You wouldn’t believe the type of things that go through those boys’ heads sometimes.”
I chuckled. “I can only imagine.”
“Ashton’s thoughts were sort of…boring,” he continued. “And Thane’s thoughts were always about you.” He darted his eyes over in my direction, gauging for my reaction, before adding, “Your thoughts were the only ones that didn’t drive me crazy or bore me to death.”
“Well, thank you for not finding my thoughts boring or annoying,” I replied, moving my eyes up to the moon. I sighed, thinking about his theory again. “I don’t know. Why would fate bother with giving the pack a placeholder if you’ll be Alpha again, anyway? It would be pointless if you’d become again, anyway. It just seems weird to me.”
“That’s because it is weird. There’s no doubt about that. Why do you think I didn’t want you to tell everyone else? It sounds crazy. It’s just that it’s the only sort of explanation I could seem to come up with.” He sighed and then scratched at his fur with his paw, a nervous habit of his—one which I rarely saw, since he’d never really been nervous about anything while he was Alpha. “Maybe it’s just wishful thinking, you know? I can’t seem to give up on the idea that I’m meant to be Alpha. I mean, it’s in my bloodline to be strong and powerful. It doesn’t seem right that being Alpha could just skip me.”
“It doesn’t seem right,” I agreed. “But crazier things have happened. Look at Samara McKinley. What are the chances that she could have been blessed with the choice between two mates and was given the opportunity to be the first female Alpha? Some werewolves are just lucky, and others aren’t.” Like me, I thought to myself bitterly.
Akar seemed to consider this for a moment. “I guess you’re right. At the end of the day, I guess whatever’s meant to be is what’s going to happen, right?”
“Exactly.”
“I heard your argument with Thane,” Akar admitted to me.
“Oh.” I wondered if he knew about the kiss, too, but I didn’t bother to ask.
“I think you should cut him some slack, Skye. Even if the two of you aren’t meant to be mates, he really cares about you. He’s only looking out for you.”
I sighed. “I know.”
“You’ll find him eventually, you know,” Akar said.
I glanced over at him sharply. “Who?”
“Your mate. It might take a while, but it will happen when the timing is perfect.”
This was the first time we’d ever talked about my search for my mate, but I knew he’d probably overheard me thinking about it plenty of times. “Thanks.”
“You don’t have to thank me, Skye. I’m just telling you what I believe to be the truth.” He paused for a moment. “I’m not really sure why you’re in such a rush to find him, though. You’re so young. You have an eternity to meet someone.”
“We might be able to live forever, but that doesn’t mean all of us do. I could get killed. Or my mate could get killed.” The thought left a bitter taste in my mouth. I didn’t want to be one of those werewolves who had to settle for companionship once their mate was killed, since, generally, we were only given one. Once I found him, I would do everything I could to protect him.
“That may be true, but…still. You have time to find your mate. It’s not like we need to abide by the Alaskan Koto pack’s rules anymore.”
I knew which rules he was talking about: the ones that required us to have our first pup by the age of eighteen, and our second and third before the age of twenty-one. We could always have more pups, too, but three were mandatory. It was a rule the Koto had in place to make sure that we steadily increased our numbers, since it was also against our rules to turn humans into wolves by biting them.
That rule was the very reason Kyana left our pack. She was the only one her age who didn’t have a pup, and she didn’t want to have one yet, either. She wanted to find her mat
e—which she had been able to do since she became a member of the Tala pack.
I realized something at that moment and glanced over at Akar. “How were you able to avoid that rule, anyway? You already turned eighteen when we were living in Alaska, and you don’t have any pups. None that I know of, at least.”
Akar snorted amusedly. “Nope, no pups for me.” He shifted positions, settling himself on the ground in front of me. “I don’t know. I just never met my mate, so I didn’t want to have pups. Even if I did meet my mate now, I still don’t think I would want pups yet. I want to live my life a little bit first. When my dad was Alpha, he didn’t push the issue. He gave me more time to meet someone first. Then, after he was gone, I just did whatever I wanted to do. I had no one else to answer to, and no one ever questioned it.”
I didn’t say anything for a few moments. A silence filled the air between us, but it wasn’t an uncomfortable one. Finally, I gave him a sideways glance. “Do you miss him?”
He glanced away from me, but I thought I noticed a look of sadness fill his eyes. “I don’t miss him…I miss who I thought he was.”
“I understand.”
Akar gazed at the moon. “It’s our first full moon here.” He glanced over at me. “Do you think you’re going to be happy here?”
I hesitated. Even though I hadn’t wanted to admit it, a part of me missed my mother and Kirima. But...this place held so many opportunities for me, ones that I would never get in Alaska. The sacrifice seemed worth it. “I think I want to stick around long enough to find out if it will make me happy. How about you?”
“I think I’m already happy here,” Akar replied. Then, tilting his head back, he let out a loud howl.
It was different from any howl I’d ever heard, though. A werewolf’s howl was usually made in sadness or anger; it was the way we released our agony when we couldn’t bear the thought of keeping it bottled up inside.
Akar’s howl was different, though. When I heard it, I didn’t hear any hurt or anger…only hope.