by Emlyn Rees
‘Yes,’ he said, ‘because of Rachel. Because she’s going to have my child. Because I love her and she loves you.’
‘To shut me up. Because you know I won’t allow it. That child. Never.’
He tried to close his ears to what she was saying. He’d come too far to let Rachel down now. ‘You’re coming with me,’ he told Mrs Vale, ‘whether you like it or not.’
Get her out of this bedroom, that’s what he was thinking. Carry her, if that was what it took. Over to the window at the front of the house. Then look out for help. Someone might come. What about the dirigible he thought he’d seen? Maybe that was working the high street this minute even, pulling people from their upstairs windows and carrying them off to safety . . .
‘You’ve come here to kill me, the same as your brother,’ she told him as he walked towards her.
‘No,’ Tony said, ‘that’s not . . .’ But the virulence of her hatred had infected him and suddenly he was cursing himself for having been so weak. He should never have listened to Bill. He should have stayed with Rachel, no matter what she’d said she’d wanted. He should have taken care of her and left the rest of the Vale family to rot.
‘Well, he didn’t manage it,’ she spat, ‘and neither will you.’
The first thing he knew of the poker in her hand was when it swung past his head, missing his face by mere inches. He stumbled backwards into the corridor. She pushed herself after him, catching up to where he’d fallen and lashing out at him again. They were both at the top of the stairs now. As Tony struggled to his feet, she struck down at him. But this time he was quicker than her and snapped his hand around her forearm. He closed his other hand over hers, so that both of them now gripped the poker together.
He wouldn’t have thought it possible, the strength she had. It took everything he had to prevent her from tearing the poker from him. Her teeth were bared and she was twisting and snarling like a cat. He grappled his hands along the haft of the poker and gave it an almighty yank.
In the same instant it came free, Mrs Vale went tumbling down the stairs. Her wheelchair went with her. Together they flipped over once, then smashed against the wooden banister. Her bare foot had got caught between two spindles, locking her there. But there was something wrong about the angle of her head. She stared up at him, unmoving, through wet-pebble eyes.
That’s when Tony first heard the noise: rumbling, rising, coming closer, quickly now. Like a train, he thought. Like a freight train hurtling towards him through the night. He felt the floor begin to vibrate and watched in horror as, with a crack, Mrs Vale’s foot slipped free, and then she and her chair toppled over into the black waters which had gathered at the bottom of the stairs.
Chapter XXV
Mallorca, Present Day
Laurie opened the large fridge in Rachel’s kitchen and pulled out the jug of filtered water. Her hand was shaking as she took two glasses from the cupboard, filled them with ice and water, and put them on the worktop. She could sense Rachel upstairs. She could feel her presence, as if she were seeping through the floor.
Her father put his hat down in Rachel’s kitchen and looked around the large open space of the villa’s living area. How could she love her father so much and yet he could cause her so much stress? The nostalgic affection she’d felt towards him when he’d been on the other side of a no doubt bulletproof, soundproof piece of glass in the airport earlier had vanished. In its place was a seething frustration. It was as if by the sheer fact of being together, she couldn’t be herself, only a version of herself that she’d long since outgrown.
Now, everything from his happy-go-lucky comments about the perils of mixing with the locals, to his gung-ho war mentality towards the ‘infernal heat’ was making her head ache. Not to mention his relentless criticism of her driving! She longed to put her hands over her ears and scream like a little child.
She took a long sip of water, feeling the coolness soothe her scorched throat. She must be patient and stay calm, she cautioned herself. She had to stay in control. It was her guilty conscience that was making her feel this way, and not her father’s fault at all.
Laurie washed her hands in the sink, running the tepid clear water over her wrists in an attempt to cool herself down. It didn’t work. As she dried her hands on a towel, she noticed that Rachel had moved the pictures of Tony as she’d asked her to, but it still didn’t make it any easier. She had thought that she’d be able to handle the situation with her father and that she’d easily be able to engineer a suitable time to tell him about Rachel. But it was more difficult than she could possibly have imagined.
The fact that they were together in Rachel’s villa was almost unbearable. She felt like an absolute traitor. Everything her father had said from the second she’d picked him up at the airport, every little remark, was made poignant by her deceit.
‘My goodness, you’ve landed on your feet.’ Her father whistled appreciatively as he accepted the glass of iced water that Laurie handed to him. She could hear the ice cubes clink in the glass. ‘I can see why you’ve been a recluse. This place is something special, isn’t it?’
‘Listen, Dad, there’s something I’ve got to tell you.’ Laurie placed both hands on the worktop and faced her father. But to her dismay, her father totally failed to pick up on the seriousness of her tone and, instead, he laughed. It was one of his I-knew-it chortles which always grated against her.
‘Oh,’ he said. ‘Oh . . . I thought so. I thought you looked different. There’s someone special, someone new, isn’t there? Is that why I’m here, to put my seal of approval on the new boyfriend? You know, I may be a little rusty, but I can still read the signs.’
Laurie hardly knew what to say.
‘Is it that obvious?’ she asked, faking a smile.
Her father slapped the worktop, pleased with himself. ‘I’ve been wondering why you’ve been so quiet and now I have my answer. I’ve never seen you look so nervous and lovesick.’
Laurie gestured to the terrace doors. She couldn’t discuss Sam inside, not when Rachel might come down at any moment and eavesdrop.
Outside, she managed to stall her father for as long as it took to show him briefly around the garden, but once they’d sat at the table in the shade, she knew the conversation couldn’t be put off any longer.
‘So where is the lucky fellow?’ her father asked, sipping his water. There was something in his enthusiasm that made her shrink away. He’d obviously been waiting to have this conversation with her for a long time. She wondered now whether he’d discussed her continued single status with his friends, whether his neighbours enquired about her love life. She couldn’t help feeling defensive. She hadn’t even told him about James, let alone Sam. Had her father assumed she was some kind of hopeless spinster all this time?
This was why she’d never discussed anything personal with her parents, she remembered. Because she couldn’t handle their enthusiasm, or their disappointment, or the way they seemed to judge her by being so eager not to. Besides, talking about her private life seemed so embarrassing, especially with her father. She wished that her mum was here.
She realised that for all her adult life she’d been telling her father an edited and highlighted version of the truth. Now, coming clean about Sam seemed as if she was breaking all the rules of their relationship. She was about to shatter her father’s illusions and reveal herself as an adult. It was new territory that seemed fraught with danger. Just starting out on the journey of explanation felt as if she were stepping on to quicksand. The only chance she had of survival was to get it over with as quickly as possible.
‘Where is he right now?’ she repeated, feeling an echo of her conversation with Roz, yesterday. But she knew she had to be brave. This was too important to start lying now. ‘Well, right now . . . he . . . Sam . . . he wants to be here and he’s longing to meet you, but the truth is that he’s with . . . he’s with his wife.’
‘Oh . . .’ her father’s face crumpled. He stared
at his glass.
‘It’s not as bad as it sounds.’
‘But . . . but you could have anyone . . .’
She knew it was going to be hard to make her father understand, but this was impossible.
‘But he’s leaving his wife. That’s what I’m trying to tell you.’
‘Well, I certainly don’t approve of you breaking up someone’s marriage,’ her father countered. ‘You’re so much better than that.’
She could see the disappointment in his face. This was all going wrong. She wanted nothing more than for him to like Sam, to accept him, and now she’d already blown it.
She shook her head, growling with frustration at herself as she sat up in her chair and leant towards him. ‘You don’t understand. I’m saying it all wrong. You see, we met before. I mean, we had an affair before. Three years ago, before Mum died. You remember I wrote you a postcard, saying that I was in love? Well, that was Sam. The same person.’
‘And was he married then?’
‘No, no, he wasn’t. Not then. We were supposed to be together, but then, then he found out that his girlfriend was pregnant –’
‘Oh, this just gets better and better,’ her father exclaimed. ‘Laurie, what are you playing at? Is that what you’ve been doing all summer? Dallying around with someone else’s husband? I know it’s none of my business, but it sounds to me as if you’ve got yourself into a bit of a mess.’
He was right. She was in a mess. He made her affair with Sam seem so sordid. And telling him the details like this made her feel more anxious than ever.
‘But . . . well . . . the thing is . . . I thought I was over him,’ Laurie said, determined to get the truth out, before her doubts subsumed her. ‘Really, I did. I had a new boyfriend and then, then, I met Sam again a few months ago and I realised – we realised – that it wasn’t over at all. And the whole point is that he, Sam, made a mistake with her . . . with Claire. He shouldn’t have married her, but he didn’t feel he could back out . . . because of the baby –’
‘But now he does?’
‘Oh, Dad, I don’t expect you to understand, but Sam and I love each other. We have to be together. It’s special. More than special. He’s the man I want to be with for ever.’
Bill Vale retrieved his handkerchief from his pocket and flicked it out, before using it to dab his face. ‘Are you sure you know what you’re doing? Are you sure he feels the same way? I mean, you can’t know how their marriage really is, can you? Marriage is sacred, Laurie. They made vows to each other. And anyway, is this Sam person honestly going to leave his wife if there’s a child involved?’
‘I think . . . I hope so.’
‘You hope so?’
‘He is. I’m sure he is. He should be . . . right now.’
Her father’s obvious horror at her predicament made her feel as if everything she knew to be true was slipping away.
‘I love him, Dad. And he loves me.’
She could feel tears welling up inside her, making her unable to speak. She was determined not to cry. She knew her father couldn’t handle seeing her emotions like this. She waved her hand in front of her face.
‘Oh dear, oh dear,’ he said. He looked away, waiting until she’d composed herself.
She took a sip of water.
‘So this place?’ he asked. ‘Does this belong to Sam?’
She could see him trying to piece together a picture from the information she’d given him. She wanted to rub it out, to try and explain it a different way. There was so much more to tell him. His earlier bonhomie had gone, replaced by a look of suspicion. He glanced around the garden, as if seeing it through different eyes.
‘No,’ she said. She might as well get it over with. She took a deep breath. ‘You’ve got to promise not to be angry . . .’
Her father frowned. ‘You mean there’s more?’
‘You see,’ she started. God, this was hard. ‘It’s Rachel’s . . . and Tony’s . . . this place. I’ve been staying here with Rachel. And Sam is –’
‘This house belongs to Rachel?’ her father burst out. ‘My sister? Is that what you’re telling me? But you said it belonged to a friend. You said . . . you . . . you made me come all this way to –’
‘Dad, you’ve got to understand,’ Laurie begged.
But her father wasn’t listening. He slammed the glass down on the table top, stood abruptly and marched down the terrace. Laurie ran after him, and caught up with him at the far end of the pool. He looked out over the horizon, livid.
‘I thought . . . I didn’t mean for you to be upset.’ She felt utterly pathetic. He’d so rarely been truly angry with her in her life that she had no means of dealing with it.
‘Upset? Upset?’ Her father’s voice was choked with rage. ‘How could you do this? Trick me like this? And I thought you were –’
‘I did it for Rachel,’ Laurie interjected quickly. ‘She thought –’
‘Whatever she thought, she thought wrong,’ her father barked.
‘But, Dad, whatever needs sorting out between you, surely –’
‘You don’t know what you’re saying, Laurie, what you’re meddling in. Do you have any idea who he was?’
‘Who?’
‘Tony Glover. He ruined everything. His family . . .’
‘What?’ She watched her father rub his face. She’d expected him to react, of course, but not like this. He looked as if he was going to cry. ‘I mean, whatever it is, surely you’ve got over it by now,’ she continued, trying to be brave. ‘It’s been fifty years. Isn’t it time to let bygones be bygones? Tony’s dead.’
‘That doesn’t matter,’ he said, his voice choking.
Why was he reacting so badly? Rachel had glossed over their problems, as if her rift with Bill was just a foolish misunderstanding that had stretched over time until it was now somehow meaningless, but whatever emotions her father felt were obviously as raw as ever.
But even so, surely it was time he started behaving like an adult. OK, so she’d told a few lies to get him to come out here, but that was nothing compared to the lifetime of lies he’d told her. About Rachel’s existence. And now, obviously, about what they’d rowed about.
‘Like what?’ she asked. ‘What don’t you get over, Dad?’
‘I never thought I’d have to tell you this,’ he said.
‘Tell me what?’
‘It was Keith Glover who shot my father – your grandfather,’ he said.
Laurie shook her head. ‘Keith?’
‘Tony’s brother. He broke into the shop to rob it and he shot Dad. And then he shot Mum. That’s why she was paralysed. That’s why she couldn’t get out when the flood hit. Because she was in a wheelchair. Because of Keith Glover. He destroyed us.’
‘But you told me that Grandpa died in the war. You lied to me.’
‘I was trying to protect you from it.’ Her father’s voice cracked with emotion. Laurie stared at him as he continued to recount, in angry bursts, how his mother’s life had been ruined. How she lived a lonely painful half-life without her husband, all because of Keith.
Laurie forced herself to think rationally. There must be a way through all this. But how? What her family had experienced back then was so horrific. All she could see was her father’s pain and all she wanted to do was to make it better.
But one thing didn’t make sense. ‘But surely you can’t blame Tony for something his brother did?’
‘Oh, Laurie,’ he said, turning to her, his eyes full of tears. ‘You’ll never understand. It wasn’t only . . .’ he paused, trying to control his emotions. ‘There was Mum, too . . . Tony . . .’
Laurie shook her head confused, as he failed to continue. There was obviously so much more that he wasn’t saying. ‘What do you mean? Grandma? What’s she got to do with Tony?’
But her father’s look suddenly turned steely and he seemed to close up. ‘It doesn’t matter,’ he snapped, rubbing his eyes angrily. When he looked at her again, his tears were gone. In t
heir place was a hard frown. ‘All you need to know is that Rachel chose Tony. She chose him over her own family.’
These festering emotions he’d been harbouring for all these years . . . she’d always thought her father was so straightforward and normal, but she could see now that she couldn’t have been more wrong. She could never have suspected that he had so much bitterness inside him.
‘But you can’t choose who you fall in love with, Dad. From what I’ve seen, Rachel and Tony were happy together. He was a good man.’
But her father wasn’t listening to the logic of her argument.
‘Rachel and Glover, they took something away from me. Something I never got back. It took me until I met your mother to even feel like I was living again.’
Laurie put her hands on her waist, feeling dizzy. She was still reeling from what she’d heard. Besides, it was so hot. Too hot to be trying to decipher her father’s emotional riddles in the full glare of the sun.
‘And you won’t ever give Rachel a chance?’
Her father was silent for ages. He was squinting towards the horizon.
‘What did I do wrong?’ he asked, suddenly.
Again, he’d thrown her. ‘What do you mean?’
‘Weren’t your mother and I enough for you?’
‘Of course you were.’
‘Then why did you need to see Rachel? Why did you?’
‘I don’t know,’ Laurie mumbled, failing to find a proper reason.
‘We gave you everything we possibly could.’
Laurie looked down into the azure water of the swimming pool next to them. She could see her and her father’s shadows on the bottom, as if they were drowning. Blurry. That’s what her whole life suddenly was. Everything she’d always believed about everyone, apart from Sam, had been ripped from her.
‘Look, I didn’t tell you before, Dad, but Rachel is inside,’ she said, suddenly. There was no point in hiding the truth from her father any longer. She thought she could control the situation between him and Rachel, but now she felt totally powerless. There was so much she didn’t know. So much she hadn’t been told. ‘She’s upstairs in the house. She wants to talk to you. Why don’t you sort all this out with her?’