by Roy Street
“I’m sorry,” he said. “Did I startle you?”
She crossed her arms protectively over her chest. “I forgot someone else might be out here. In the winter I’m usually the only one on this floor during weeknights.”
“Aren’t you cold?”
“No. It’s why I came out here. To get the cold air on my skin. It’s invigorating. And frankly, right now I need that to make my body feel alive. Combats my anxiety. Brings out the animal in me. You know, as in, grrrrr.”
“Actually, I think it’s more like brrrrr.”
She smiled, tilting her head. The light splashed over a childlike face, fine-boned and delicate. “Guess I look pretty dumb hopping all around like this. Kind of embarrassing.”
Dumb? Beautiful was more like it. He couldn’t help staring. Yes, her bare feet touched the ground. And her mid-thigh robe revealed long, bare legs with well-defined muscles that weren’t lost on Aiden. He was an obsessive runner and worshipped at the shrine of the sculpted thigh. “I didn’t mean to intrude.”
“You were here first.” She shivered and shifted on her feet, shaking out her hands, and he noticed her little dance was not a happy one.
“Is something wrong?”
“Um, this thing started happening.”
The tremor that crept into her voice made him step closer. “Anything I can do to help?” Aiden hoped his tone was solid and comforting enough to make her open up to him. For some reason he badly needed her to do that.
She shrugged and the collar of her loose, silky robe slipped off to one side revealing a lean, ivory shoulder that nearly unraveled him. He changed his mind and decided it was time to back away, to just let the conversation die.
But then she came toward him and said, “I couldn’t sleep.”
“Hey, I’m the king of insomniacs. I’ve read just about every book on how to get to sleep.”
“Did you ever hear of counting your breaths to make yourself drowsy?”
“Sure.”
“I was doing that. But I got to thinking if I don’t keep paying attention to each and every breath I would forget to breathe. In which case, if I fell asleep I’d stop breathing and never wake up. Crazy, huh?” She started pacing and shaking her hands. “It’s happening again. My heart’s racing and my arms are tingling.”
“Medulla oblongata.”
Her feet stilled, and she turned to him. “What?”
“The part of your brain stem that controls all your involuntary functions. Like breathing. Even if you deliberately forced yourself to stop, you’d just faint and start breathing all over again. The body was made to survive. Takes a lot more than scary thoughts to close the show.”
“Makes sense. And here I was convinced I was dying. To think I got an A in biology class.”
“Sounds like you just had a panic attack. Irrational fears. Impending doom.”
“That’s me, all right.” She let out a self-conscious giggle that was half-girlish, half-sexy. Like her body.
The combination got under his skin in a way that surprised him. He hadn’t paid much attention to any women since his beloved Wendy had left this world. Sure, he’d had sex now and then. What man could go six years without it? But he’d kept it all on the surface. Never let anyone breach his protective wall. So how come those huge brown eyes focused on him now were searing straight through to his core?
“You get them, too, don’t you?” she asked, her soft, earnest voice like velvet against his skin. “That’s how you know.”
“Used to.” Yeah, after seeing his whole world fall apart and being totally powerless to stop it, he knew what it was to have fear take over. “But I got pretty slick at deflecting them. I learned to switch my focus. I’d think of stuff like… peanut butter and chocolate brownies.”
“Brownies?”
“Gooey and rich. With walnuts. The kind my grandma used to make.”
“Riiight.”
“So cynical.”
“So corny.”
“Okay, I made up the part about granny.”
“Ha! I could tell your were fibbing.”
“Oh, she made brownies, but they sucked. Terrible cook. Not your proverbial grandmother.”
A laugh burst out, but she quickly cupped her hand to her mouth. “I don’t want to wake up the other guests.”
“I am the ‘other guests.’ And as you can see I’m already awake.”
She pointed a finger upward. “There’s a nice couple staying on the third floor. And they look like the kind of people who actually go to sleep at night.”
He shook his head. “Think what they’re missing. Stars overhead, panic attacks. How’s yours doing now, by the way?”
Her rosebud mouth formed an O. “You made me forget all about it. Thank you.”
They stared at each other a moment and Aiden couldn’t think of anything he wanted more right now than to kiss those full, sweet lips. He looked away.
“What’s your name?” she asked.
“Aiden Flynn.”
“Well, Aiden, I’ve got a hot tip for you on brownies. My sister’s best friend Natalie D’Alessio owns the Coffee Cove down on Cove Street, and she makes the most outrageous brownies.”
“You’re a local girl?”
She nodded. “I’m Jenna Richardson.”
“Related to the woman who owns this B&B?”
“She’s my mother. I grew up in this house. But it was a farmhouse then, not a B&B.” She heaved a sigh. “I’m kind of back for a while. You know that TV show called Sunrise Lane?”
“Sure. That’s the one they shoot in the Hamptons.”
“Well, I’m going to be in it.”
“You’re an actress.”
“Not really. I’m a dancer, a soloist for American Ballet Theater. Or I was until I two weeks ago. I’m on a leave of absence from the company for three months. I got really sick of my life and decided to make a change. To try out a new profession.”
“That’s brave.”
She gave him a sheepish look. “Truth is, I caught a huge lucky break. Sean Risk, the star of the series is also one of the producers. He saw me perform, asked me out for dinner and before dessert arrived, he offered me a role on the show.”
In return for? An unbidden surge of protectiveness and jealousy sprang up in Aiden. He forced it back with the reminder that this magical female creature would never want him, anyway. Even if she didn’t have a movie star courting her. “That’s really fabulous.”
“Exactly. So why am I so freaked out?”
“Maybe because there’s so much to lose.”
Jenna combed her fingers through her long sable hair. “You aren’t kidding. What if I bomb? Ballet is all I know. It’s been my life since forever. What if I mess up my lines tomorrow? What if the ratings go down because I’m so bad? What if Sean hates me for ruining his show? What if—”
“Whoa.” He stop-signed his hands. “You’re a runaway train. There’s your panic attack.” He gestured at the night sky. “The universe is filled with what-ifs. There are always things beyond our control. Take it from one who knows what it’s like to try and rail against the forces of nature. After a point you have to surrender and enjoy the ride, or in some cases… suffer through it.”
“The C word. I know it all too well. Dance is all about control. It’s about practicing something over and over until I get it right. Or analyzing a flaw in my technique and working my tail off to correct it. The perfect career for those of us who are never satisfied. Letting go of that is like trying to break an addiction. One that feels like a prison.” She twisted her fingers together. A troubled gesture that made his heart melt.
They stood so close now, one on either side of the fence, that if he bent forward he could bury his face in her hair. Instead he inhaled the scent of her coconut shampoo, wondering if she knew how beautiful she was.
Jenna glanced up at Aiden, and her breath caught. “I’ve never told anyone this before. Not sure I knew it myself. I’m sorry. You must be sick of
hearing about me and my problems. Tell me about yourself. Where are you from? And what do you do?”
“Nothing interesting.” He hated those kinds of questions. Switching subjects, he gestured to his Celestron. “Want to see the surface of the moon? Or how about the constellation Andromeda?”
Her large eyes got even bigger. “Is that your hobby? Stargazing?”
“Yep.” But the stars were more than a hobby. Talk about addictions. This was his nightly escape from the memories that plagued his sleep.
Jenna placed a hand on top of the fence and in one effortless motion that would make any parkour traceur proud, swung her legs up into a scissor (with pointed feet of course) and floated over to his side.
Her deft display of perfect body control and coordination must have taken less than two seconds, but it was time enough for Aiden to catch a full glimpse of her magnificent legs. Pangs of longing shuddered through him all the way to his groin. Struggling against his body’s reaction to Jenna, he led her to the telescope.
She gave him an inquisitive eye and studied the stubby gray cylinder that sat perched atop a tripod. “Do I need to adjust something before taking peek?”
“No. You’re good to go.” He pointed to the small eyepiece. “Try covering your right eye with the palm of your hand instead of simply closing it. Less tiring and it reduces the tendency to squint with the other.”
Jenna cupped her right eye and gazed into the eyepiece with her left. “Oooh. Like tiny blue Christmas lights. Only gazillions of them spread out in a haze. I’ve never seen anything so beautiful. There are even some pinks and purples, mixed in there along with the white stars.” She looked up, her face bright. “So beautiful. So magical. Thank you.”
Stepping away from the telescope, she placed a hand on his arm, sending a shock wave through him. He wanted so badly to touch her. To reach his arms around her and pull her close. To run his tongue down that swan like neck and over her creamy shoulder.
Watch it, man. You don’t need this. Since Wendy’s death he’d done fine in his hobbit-like isolation. No woman had ever made him want to leave it. Why this one?
He reigned in his inexplicably out-of-control desire and started talking about the stars. “Winter is a relatively good time for stargazing. With the telescope we can see clusters of lights strewn across the deepest regions of space. All kinds of solar systems replete with planets, moons and stars.”
Aiden showed her Cassiopeia and a globular cluster in Pegasus. They looked at the waning moon and talked about the Milky Way with its hundred thousand million stars.
Jenna gasped and nodded in all the right places, making him feel like the most intriguing man alive. Was it a well-practiced act she used on men? He didn’t think so. There was something too straightforward about her for that. Not that he thought she was an innocent. But a childlike wonder ran through her that made her seem like fresh, clean water to a man so parched.
Finally she yawned and said, “I’m going to be able to sleep now without trouble. And it’s all thanks to you.” She flashed him a smile that made all the stars seem pale beside it.
He watched as she leaped the fence and disappeared into her room.
Maybe Jenna would have an easier time dozing off thanks to him, but Aiden knew the disturbing effect she had on him would keep him awake until dawn.
Chapter Three
The scent of freshly brewed coffee and baked goods wafted through the cozy, diner. Natalie’s Coffee Cove was this small town’s favorite casual eatery and a neighborhood hang for the locals. The clock over the register read 3:17 p.m. and still the glossy white tables that dotted the sunlit storefront were filled with chattering customers.
Jenna pressed her back against the vinyl cushioned seat of her window booth and gazed out at North Cove’s sleepy main drag, which consisted of two streets with local shops, plus a post office and a national chain drug store. She’d grown up here, and after spending the last five and a half years living in the bustling excitement of Manhattan she’d craved the warmth of this small town set amid stretches of farms, vineyards and fishing villages.
Her roommate in New York City didn’t understand. Said she was crazy giving up her share of their apartment to another dancer. But riding on the high of Sean Risk’s attention and the chance for an exciting new career, Jenna had been certain it was time to leave.
Now that she was here, she couldn’t deny the jitters and questions mounting inside. Was being homesick the real reason she’d agreed to Sean’s offer? Sunrise Lane was shot out here on the East End, a short ferry ride away from North Cove. Or had she once again gone starry-eyed over a guy at the top of his game?
“I’m not surprised he’s such a nice person,” Lexi said, digging into her peach cobbler. “I’ve read that he gives to a lot of charities.”
Jenna, Lexi and Rachel had been a trio since the third grade when they’d banded together against a couple boys who’d been tormenting a stray cat. Despite Jenna moving to Manhattan and Lexi going off to college for four years, they’d kept in touch.
“How outrageous that you’re actually dating him.” Rachel’s pitch heightened, turning her words into a squeal. “I’m soooo jealous.”
“I’m gonna tell Nick on you,” Lexi teased. Then she caught herself. “No, I mean—”
“Everything’s fine now,” Rachel said. Her marriage to Nick Stiebler, the toughest bad boy in their high school class, was often rocky. Danielle, her little three-year-old, was usually the main topic of conversation. That and the bridal boutique Lexi had opened last year. But today all they wanted to talk about was Jenna’s first day on the set of Sunrise Lane, which was primarily shot in a couple mansions in the Hamptons. No surprise that every other question was about her budding relationship with Sean Risk.
Jenna set her elbows on the table, hunched down, and dropped her voice to a whisper. “I need your advice on a problem.”
Her two confidants followed suit, their heads huddled only inches apart.
“Sean told me he’s considering making me one of the regular leads in the series.”
Lexi gasped. “Call that a problem?”
Rachel trilled. “You realize what that could mean for your acting career?”
“Of course I do,” Jenna said.
“You are one lucky girl,” Lexi said.
“That’s the problem. I’m not sure it’s all luck. I slept with Sean.”
Rachel giggled and made a fake swat at Jenna. “Now I really am jealous.”
“Don’t be. I’ve been agonizing over it ever since, and I can’t help being haunted by a nagging question.”
“Which is?”
Jenna flashed them a pained look. “Have I become a ruthless Hollywood slut?”
Lexi burst out laughing. Her dark-skinned hand touched Jenna’s wrist. “You must take worry pills. You don’t have a ruthless bone in your body. In fact, what worries me is just the opposite problem. That Mr. Risk is going to steal your tender heart and leave you in a sorry heap.”
Rachel nodded. “I’ll bet he has loads of women chasing him. And remember, he’s the one who picked you out.”
Jenna shrugged. “But I swore I wouldn’t let this happen. I wanted to keep the relationship strictly professional.”
“Do you like him?” Lexi asked. “Are you attracted to him?”
“Well, yeah. But I can’t help but wonder if I’m really attracted to Sean or to the thrill of his being rich and famous.”
Rachel chimed in. “Is it any different from Joanne falling for that rich stockbroker? A man’s accomplishments are part of his character. What’s so wrong about that?”
Lexi’s hand went to her hip. “Hey, I could learn to love ten million a year in a hurry.”
Their conversation was interrupted by Natalie D’Alessio, Coffee Cove’s owner and kitchen maestro, who stopped at their table. “Well, if it isn’t our resident star. I heard the North Fork Light is doing a spread on you. Baby sis is cookin’.”
Seven years ol
der than Jenna, Natalie was the best friend of Jenna’s big sister Casey. And someone all the locals went to for the latest gossip. Years ago she’d spent so much time in the Richardson’s house she’d been unofficially added into the family constellation somewhere between Casey and ultimate caretaker and protector, big bro Parker.
“You heard right,” Jenna said. “A photographer is coming to the B&B tomorrow. Mom’s really excited about it. She’s getting her hair done as we speak.”
“It’s fantastic. I’ve never seen her so happy. That should make you feel especially proud, considering what she’s been through in her day.”
“Sure does.” Jenna smiled as Natalie gave her a gentle punch on the shoulder and walked away.
But that same twisting knot started in Jenna’s stomach. What if she was a total bomb on TV? Would it send her mom spiraling down into those dark moods again? She felt a panicky tightness starting in her chest and tried to shift the focus like Aiden told her.
“So how is the shop going?” she asked Lexi, who was busy sharing Rachel’s french fries.
After studying fashion design, Lexi had returned home, opened a bridal boutique in Greenport and was developing her own clothing line. While she talked about her latest projects, Jenna spotted a familiar figure at the bakery counter.
Rooftop astronomer and do-it-yourself shrink, Aiden Flynn. Could it be he was here to buy brownies?
He looked different in the daylight. Jenna had a vague memory of enjoying his profile in the near dark last night, but he’d just seemed like a moderately good-looking man. A little light on the subject called for a surprising reassessment and definite upgrade.
Aiden was downright hot with a too-cute butt and lean athletic build. Facially, he resembled Viggo Mortenson but with watchful emerald eyes.
That were looking right at her now.
Jenna gave him a wiggly-fingered wave.
Aiden walked toward her with an elegant stride. “No brownies left.”
“Newsflash: Natalie usually sells out of those by eleven in the morning,” Rachel said. “Got to get here bright and early to make your claim.” She extended her hand. “I’m Rachel, by the way. And this is Lexi.”