“Come on, man. Take that stick out of your ass.” Mack mimed plucking a stick from his own butt, catching the eye of more than a few passers-by. “You’re my best bro. I just want you to enjoy the finer parts of being a hockey god.”
“We aren’t hockey gods.” He shoved his friend away with a laugh. “It’s called being a professional. I’m in a contract year.”
“So am I, dude.”
“Yeah, but you’re Grant Mackenzie.” Josh fanned his face in mock swoon. “I don’t have that kind of cache. I just need to keep my head down and do what I’m paid to do.”
“You’re too serious.”
“Maybe.” Josh shrugged. “But it’s worked for me so far.”
They wound their way through the lower level of the arena to the locker room. They’d been back for a few days, doing fitness testing, but this was their first day back on the ice and Josh knew what that meant. They probably wouldn’t even be putting on pads. Skating drills only.
“Yo, Zak!” Mack called when they entered the busy room.
The small Russian came over, a grin spread across his face. Viktor Zakharov was only about 5’10”, which would have been small for a forward. He was a defenseman, a position where size was an even bigger advantage. He held his own though.
“You ready to sweat?” Zak asked in his thick accent. When he first started in the league five years ago, he didn’t speak any English. Now that barrier was no longer there.
“As ready as we’ll ever be.” Mack sighed. He wasn’t big on conditioning. It was the one knock on his game. They said he was incredibly talented, but perpetually out of game-shape.
“So, Mack, you actually going to score some goals for us this year?” Zak punched him in the shoulder and laughed.
“Dude!” Mack shot to his feet. “I was the leading scorer last year!”
“I didn’t get to raise the Stanley cup last year,” Josh joined in, looking at some of his other teammates. “Did you?” They all shook their heads, grinning.
The corner of Mack’s mouth tilted up as he poked Zak in the chest. “Maybe that’s because too many pucks get by you on defence.”
“Nah.” Josh laughed. “It’s all you, man.”
“Screw you guys.”
“Alright, guys,” Olle Isaksson, the team’s captain, yelled, trying to quiet the room. “Coach had a family emergency so our new assistant, Coach Scott, is leading practice today. Coach James will be there too. So lace ‘em up and get out on the ice.”
When they stepped onto the ice surrounded by thousands of empty seats, all the joking from the locker room was gone. This was business, but it was more than that. After a long summer, coming back to the arena, back to the team, felt like coming home.
Coach Scott introduced himself. Josh thought the way he spoke at the gathering after the memorial service for Danny was because he was upset. Now he wasn’t so sure. He had that no-nonsense, kind of harsh way about him.
After a few minutes, he had the team line up at the blue line and begin their skating drills.
“Pick it up!” he yelled.
It wasn’t long before Josh’s shirt was soaked. No matter how hard you train in the off-season, these conditioning days kill you.
Mack wheezed beside him, and Josh had to hide his grin. There was a chink in the All-Star’s game after all.
About the time Coach Peterson would have had them quit, Coach Scott started ramping it up. Looking down the line at his teammates, Josh noticed a few that looked like they were ready to keel over.
Josh had just passed center ice when an intense wave of dizziness came over him. His heart slammed in his chest as he stumbled, unable to regain his balance. And then it was gone.
“You okay, Walker?” Coach Scott asked.
“Yeah,” he lied. “Fine.”
“Okay, then. You guys are done for today.”
After their showers, Josh and Mack sat side by side in their lockers, putting on their shoes. Mack looked sideways at him, but Josh gave him a ‘don’t ask’ glare in return.
It wasn’t the first time it had happened. A little over a year ago, when he was training in New York, he’d started getting light-headed during practice. He’d assumed it was because he was training too hard. He backed off and it didn’t happen again until a game that October. He didn’t think it was a big deal, so he didn’t tell his team doctor. It hadn’t caused any problems.
For a guy like him, playing in a grinder roll on the third line, missing games because of injury or illness could derail his season, which would give some of the guys in the AHL the chance to take his spot. He knew many of them were better than him. Heck, some were projected first-liners. He didn’t want to give them the chance to prove they were NHL ready. He’d worked too hard for that.
“Let’s go grab some lunch before the team meeting this afternoon,” Mack said, standing and stretching his arms.
“Sounds good.”
Josh grabbed his phone from his bag and checked it. No more missed calls. He wondered if Ethan had given up. He stuffed the phone in his pocket, realizing he couldn’t let Ethan get to him, and followed Mack.
Taylor fingered her hair for the millionth time. It was amazing how different a haircut could make you feel. She wanted different. She didn’t want to be herself anymore.
Well, this hair was definitely not Taylor Scott. Her long locks were gone, leaving behind a pixie cut that was short on the sides and longer on top. Her mom was going to hate it, but she wasn’t going to get mad at her. No, apparently it wouldn’t do to yell at the sad little grieving girl. She wanted someone to yell at her. Maybe if they start treating her normally, she would eventually feel normal again.
No. Nothing was ever going to be normal - at least not the normal she wanted.
But she was here, in Columbus, Ohio. That Josh boy had been right. It wasn’t hick-ville like she’d been expecting. To be honest, she was glad to leave Portland, where everyone in her part of town knew her.
Here, the people on the street were just strangers. Strangers who didn’t know her. Strangers who didn’t know Danny.
On the bridge of her nose sat a pair of glasses, a new purchase since she stopped wearing contacts. It was a new her.
She looked up when her dad entered the diner. It was their compromise. He wanted her to meet him for lunch, but she refused to go anywhere near the arena. So they chose this place nearby.
His eyes scanned the room, not seeing her. She stood up and his face showed his surprise when he recognized her.
“Hi, Sweetie.” He reached the table and leaned down to kiss her cheek. “New look?”
“It was time for a change.” She gave him a weak smile, and he didn’t press, opting to change the subject instead.
“So, I’m pretty sure I’ve already made the guys hate me,” he chuckled softly.
“Stop, Dad,” she cut in. “You promised.”
“I know, honey. I just miss your input.”
“I told you I want nothing to do with hockey. Not now. Not ever. I can’t deal with that. I don’t want to hear you talk about it. I won’t go to games. I don’t even want to be in the arena. And for God’s sake, keep the guys on your team completely separate from me.”
“Alright.” He sighed.
They ordered their food and then waited for it in silence.
Taylor used to love hockey. She was proud that her dad was a coach. His team in Portland had been like her second family. Stats, prospects, standings… nothing escaped her mind. Until now.
She blamed hockey for taking Danny from her. He’d been training when he went into cardiac arrest. It turned out he had an undetected heart condition, but she couldn’t help wondering if he hadn’t been pushing himself so hard at hockey, would he still be alive?
“Are you excited to move into the dorms next week?” her dad asked, trying to relieve the tension.
“Not really, no.”
“It’ll be good for you.”
“Maybe,” she muttered lowly.
She had already deferred college for a year. When they found out about the possibility of this job for her dad, her mom put in an application for her to Ohio State. And a dorm request. They thought it was time she had a life of her own.
Maybe it was. She didn’t know anything anymore.
With the topics of hockey and college off limits, she found they didn’t have much else to talk about. Lunch was uncomfortable to say the least.
When the bill came, her dad paid and then said he had to head out to make it back for the team meeting. Taylor knew they were both secretly glad to be going their separate ways.
Chapter Three
The week passed slowly. Taylor hung around the house, playing with her little sister and reading. She loved books. They were the only thing that could get her out of her own head. It sounded cliché to call them an escape, but that’s exactly what they were for her.
Taylor looked up from her book when there was a knock on her bedroom door.
“Come in,” she called.
Her mom entered and walk towards her with her hands clasping something behind her back. “You have your stuff all packed into the car?”
“Well, it was already packed up from the move from Portland. So, yeah.” Taylor looked back down at her book, hoping her mom would get the hint.
“I found something when I was unpacking some boxes downstairs.” Her mom sat on the corner of the bed and held out the sketchpad she’d been concealing.
Taylor glanced up quickly and then looked away. “I don’t want it.”
“Honey, you used to love to draw.”
Taylor remembered that all too well. She used to sit for hours perfecting her sketches. It soothed her. Danny would sit with her, playing his guitar. They were perfect moments. Moments she couldn’t bear to corrupt by creating new ones without him.
“I used to love a lot of things, Mom.”
“Do you really think he’d want this, Taylor?”
“No, because he wouldn’t want to be dead.” She snapped the book shut. This conversation again, she thought.
“He also wouldn’t want you giving up everything that makes you you. Swimming… drawing… even smiling.” She reached out to touch her daughter’s cheek, but then drew her arm back.
“First of all, I don’t swim anymore because I graduated high school. Drawing doesn’t hold an appeal. And smiling, well, there’s just nothing left to smile about.”
“That’s where you’re wrong. You still have your family. You’re alive. Even Danny should still make you smile. His memory. Honey, it’s been over a year. I just want to see you at least trying to move on.”
Taylor stood, wanting to get away from her mother. The worst thing was that she knew her mom was right. She always was. But, she couldn’t feel anything these days. She knew they loved her, yet she didn’t feel loved. She knew this was a fresh start, but hope eluded her. Thinking of Danny made her both want to smile and cry, cancelling each other out and not allowing her to do either.
“Robin?” Taylor’s dad’s voice sounded from downstairs.
“Up here, Doug,” her mom called back.
“You ladies ready to go?”
Taylor’s mom looked at her pointedly and she nodded. They walked down the stairs in silence before Taylor got into her car and followed her parents towards her new school. The tower where Taylor would live for the school year was only about a twenty-minute drive.
She waited in line to get her key while her parents started unloading the cars. Surrounded by other students, Taylor found herself unable to look any of them in the eye.
She retrieved her key and before long, she was standing outside her new room with her family close behind. They set down their heavy loads as soon as they were through the door to the suite. Six girls would be sharing this living space as well as the bathroom.
Her room was the third one back. As she pushed open the door, she was all but accosted by a tall girl with curly blond hair that bounced as she walked. She threw her long arms around Taylor and squeezed once before letting go.
“Oh my God, hi!” She spoke with a thick southern drawl. “You must be my roommate!”
“Yeah.” Taylor adjusted her glasses and looked down at her feet.
“I’m Abigail.” The girl didn’t seem to sense Taylor’s discomfort as she remained close. “Abigail Stewart.”
“This is Taylor Scott.” Mom in for the save.
Taylor finally looked up and met Abigail’s shockingly blue eyes. The girl pulled on one of her curls as she regarded the quiet Taylor in front of her and then it bounced back into place.
Taylor’s dad walked in and dumped the final load on her bed.
“I’m Evie!” Evie stepped between the girls and looked up at Abigail as if she couldn’t believe she wasn’t introduced.
“Nice to meet you, Evie.” Abigail stifled a laugh.
“Well, Tay, we’re going to go now that you’re settled.” Her dad kissed the top of her head.
“Love you, sweetie.” Her mom gave her a tight hug.
“Bye,” Taylor said quietly.
“Aren’t you coming with us, sissy?” Evie asked, her eyes growing wider.
Taylor bent down and hugged her sister. “I’ll come see you soon.”
She watched as her family exited the room, leaving her with this complete stranger that was bubbly and excited. Basically everything Taylor was not.
“So, there’s this party tonight,” Abigail said.
Taylor groaned and flopped down on her bed.
“And here in the wild, we have a Taylor Scott. These animals are dangerous, but they’re an endangered species, with only one of their kind anywhere in the world.” The camera spun from a laughing Taylor to Danny, the speaker.
His grin lit up the screen on Taylor’s laptop.
“You bet your ass I’m dangerous.” Taylor stood and walked towards the camera that was now pointed at her again.
They were outside at the Jones’ house, hanging by the pool. Danny used to take video of everything on his phone. He’d send them all to her right after taking them. She never deleted a single one.
“You wouldn’t hurt me, baby,” his smooth voice said.
“And why is that?” She put her hands on her hips.
His face appeared before the camera. “Because she loves me,” he whispered.
“What did you say?”
“Only that you looooove me.” He grinned again, a single dimple appearing in his cheek.
She laughed and wrapped her arms around his waist. “I do.” She kissed his bare shoulder.
“See,” Danny said to the camera. “I told you.”
The screen went black and Taylor shut the lid of her laptop, not ready to torture herself with more of his videos. She wiped her damp face on her sleeve and sunk back against her pillows. Everyone told her that crying would make her feel better, help her cope. That was never the case. It only made her feel more miserable. Her chest heaved painfully, and she took a deep breath to calm herself down.
She remembered that day. After she finally convinced Danny to turn the camera off, Sarah came running out of the house to cannonball into the pool. It was a good day.
Taylor sighed and looked at the clock. Three in the morning and her roommate still wasn’t back from the party. Taylor had declined to go, and it was looking like a good decision. Sleep still eluded her, so she turned on the bedside lamp and grabbed her Kindle. Time for a trip into someone else’s mind.
“Walker, my office,” Coach Scott disappeared around the corner, and Josh followed him.
It felt a little like being sent to the principal’s office. In his rookie year, every time he was asked to see one of the coaches, he assumed he was getting sent to the AHL. That was how hockey worked. No one expected him to stick for the whole season. He didn’t think he had to worry about that now, but it was always in the back of his mind. That or a trade. When you’re not a superstar, nothing is surprising.
Josh sat across
from Coach Scott and waited for him to speak.
“I want to try moving you up in the line-up,” he said. “See how you do on Mack’s wing.”
“Really, Coach?” Josh’s jaw hung open.
“Yes, really. What, you think I’m bullshitting you?” He leaned forward and looked Josh in the eye.
“No, Sir.”
“I’m going to need a lot more from you,” he continued. “You’ll get more ice time.”
“I can do it,” Josh said, a grin spreading across his face.
“I know you can, son. But, understand, this is an experiment. Your buddy Mack can’t seem to play well with others, and I need him to be less of a lone wolf. Coach Peterson has pawned off the Mackenzie problem on me.”
“I understand.” Josh got up to leave, but Coach Scott stopped him.
“I have something else I need to ask of you.”
“Anything, Coach.” Josh waited expectantly.
“I want you to work with one of the young rooks. Carter Neil. We think he might stick when the season starts. He’s very green, but also very good.”
“What do you need from me?” Josh clasped his hands behind his back and stood still.
“Just show him the ropes. He missed the start of training camp, but he’ll be here today and wants to come in for a quick on-ice workout. We’re not holding a spot for him, but we’re fully prepared for him to come in and earn one.”
“I’ll be here.”
“Good man,” Coach Scott said, nodding his head towards the door. “That’s all I needed. You can go.”
Josh grinned as he walked into the locker room and found Mack waiting for him. He’d never started on the first line before. It was a big deal. Normally, a guy like him wouldn’t get the chance. Increased ice time. Increased value to the team. He wasn’t much of a goal scorer, but maybe that was about to change with a center like Mack. Now all he had to do was tame the beast.
He wanted a long hockey career. It was the only thing he’d ever wanted to do in his life. He felt more at home on the ice than he did anywhere else. Everyone had their sanctuaries. That was his.
The New Beginnings (Books #1-3) Page 35