"Oh thank God." My knees almost give out as I find a page with instructions on the emergency prep of an antibiotic, but it’s only a partial note. There’s nothing in it on the parasite specifically and I don’t know if it can cure me, but it may slow this down. And it’s the best chance I’ve got. The only chance I’ve got.
"You found it?" Arsen asks, hope in his voice.
"Maybe," I tell him.
"Good, because we do not have a lot of time," Jackson adds, bracing himself against the door as it shudders under the impact of something slamming into the other side. "I think they have a fucking battering ram out there."
I waste no more time with talking, marking the page and gathering up the notebook quickly, which would be easier if I wasn’t losing it. My hands won't stop shaking, my legs won't support me, and every mild setback sets off a wave of blinding rage.
I knock a glass flask with my jittery hands and actually scream, fighting the urge to smash every other flask with it. It would be so easy to go feral, to just let go and slip into mindlessness.
"Sasha."
Arsen touches my shoulder and I nearly swipe at him before I can stop myself. He grabs me by the arms to stop me and it takes all I have not to attack him. I grit my teeth, fighting for control.
"Sasha, you've got to stop," he says, holding me tight. "You're losing it."
"I'm not!" I snap at him. "I can do this! Let me go!"
He takes his hands off me reluctantly.
"At least let me help," he begs.
I want so badly to refuse him. The wild anger inside me would love to make him a target, to lash out at him, to force him away or find a reason to attack him.
"Please," I force myself to say instead. "I can’t—”
“Sasha, talk to me.”
“If I try the antiviral for the virus strain, it may help. May stop it.”
“Where do I get?” Arsen asks, glancing around.
“I have to make it.”
He steadies his shoulder. “Tell me what you need.”
“The notes.” I reach my hand out for them and he sets the papers in my palm.
“What next?” Arsen says, unable to hide the elevating tone in his voice.
“There.” I point to the Erlenmeyer flask. He grabs it immediately and follows me back to the counter, where I’m preparing to turn on the burner with shaking hands. I’m struggling to read Demetri’s instructions. Sweat beads on my forehead as I prepare a solution, my hands shaking too much to pour steadily. I stop, try again, and shake so badly I slosh the fucking saline all over my shirt. I'm going to have to start over and it's going to take time I don't fucking have. I scream in frustration again, slamming my fists on the table and Arsen, the idiot, reaches for me, trying to comfort me.
I lash out at him without even thinking, and he reels back with a bleeding gash in his arm, staring at me like he doesn't recognize me. I stare back at him, my horror reflected in his eyes, and I'm not sure that I recognize myself.
"That's it," Jackson calls from where he's holding the door. "She's getting dangerous."
"No," Arsen says immediately, stepping between me and Jackson. "That was my fault. She's going to be fine. We just need more time."
"No," I say with a groan, covering my face with my hands, now wet with Arsen's blood, too. "No, he's right. I can't do this."
Tears sting my eyes and I fight to control the helpless sobs shaking me. Arsen, despite what just happened, takes me by the shoulders again, making me look in his eyes.
"You can still do this," he says, his resolve hard as steel. "We can still do this. Just let me help you. We'll do it together."
I close my eyes.
"Jackson," I call. "Do you have any restraints that could stop a feral vampire?"
"I've been carrying them since I found out you were infected," he admits, pulling a complicated leather-and-iron mechanism out of his bag.
He fits it on me, and it takes all my strength not to fight him. Arsen's arms around me from behind keep me still and keep my soul steady. A wide leather collar immobilizes my neck, restricting my ability to bite. It's joined by an iron bar to a pair of leather manacles that cover my hands like mittens. I won't be able to grab or claw anyone, either. It's humiliating, but at least they're safer if I lose it completely.
"How do you feel?" Arsen asks.
"Like I'm standing on a tightrope," I tell him. "And there's a big black abyss on one side and an inferno on the other. I'm so tired, and the rage keeps getting worse."
"I've got you," Arsen assures me, kissing the top of my head. "You're going to be fine. I won't let you fall, I promise."
Something slams into the lab doors again as Jackson finishes restraining me and he darts back across the room to hold it. Arsen's welding marks crack open and someone tries to shove themselves through, just to get a faceful of Jackson's silver nitrate birdshot. That guy's probably not getting up again.
Arsen rushes to help him, twisting the doors shut again, but we're running out of time.
"Hurry," Jackson says as soon as the doors are somewhat secure. "If we're going to do this we have to do it now."
I brace myself on a counter where I can see Demetri’s notes.
"Arsen," I say sharply. "We need to restart the solution. Get the saline on the burner and start preparing the proteins. Those in the flask right now are ruined. There are more in the fridge. The vials with the green caps. Go, go!" I rest my head in my palm.
Arsen rushes to the fridge and I coach him through it, one step at a time. Heat this, measure that, check the acidity. He doesn't know half the terms so I have to simplify everything as much as I can. But it's coming together, and a lot faster than when I was trying to do it with my jitters.
"What next?" Arsen asks, and my eyes skim over the notes, double-checking everything. The words swim in front of me. Rage throbs in my temples. The collar chafes my throat. Every noise and texture is unbearable. I want to scream and cry but we're so close. I'm fighting the rage to get every word out. I'm not just on a tightrope now. I'm standing on a tightrope across from a monstrous, mindless version of myself that wants nothing more than to shove me off.
"We're almost . . ." I struggle to get the words out, slurring. It's hard to describe being panicked and exhausted at the same time. How the tension just makes the exhaustion sharper. I want to curl up somewhere dark and slip away. Even knowing what that means, it’s hard to imagine there could be anything worse than staying awake right now. Then continuing to fight. I just want to rest. "Almost . . . You just need to . . . there's . . ."
Blackness crashes down like a curtain falling. One moment I’m on my feet and the next I’m in Arsen's arms, being lowered to the ground.
"Sasha!" he begs. "Sasha, hang on! What do I do, Sasha? What do I do next?"
"Arsen!" Jackson shouts from the other side of the room, panic in his voice. I hear the crack of the weld spots splitting again and shouting as the other vampires force the door open. "Arsen, I need you over here, now!"
"Sasha, please," Arsen presses his forehead to mine, holding me tightly. "Please tell me what to do. I love you so much, baby. I love you."
I want to tell him what to do. I want to tell him I love him, too. But the words won't come. My body isn't my own anymore. I’m falling, down into a deep, silent void.
"Hang on," Arsen whispers to me. I hear Jackson cry out and the crash of the doors failing. "Hang on, Sasha. I've got you. I'm not going anywhere."
My vision shrinks to a point, like the tiny point of illumination left in the center of the screen after turning off an old cathode televison. I can't see Arsen's face. I can't tell him not to die for me. Darkness swallows me, and the last thing I hear is his voice, promising . . .
"Not ever."
Finish Reading Sasha’s story in Girl, Immortal
Coming July 24, 2018!
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Graceley & Dee
Also By Graceley Knox & D.D. Miers
The Girl, Vampire Series
1. Girl, Bitten
2. Girl, Forsaken
3. Girl, Immortal (Coming July 24, 2018)
How to Be A Necromancer
1. Grave Promise
2. Grave Debt
The Kresova Vampire Harems: Aurora
1.Thirst
2.Tempt
3.Turn
All in One: Aurora
The Kresova Vampire Harems: Lyra
1. Favor (Coming June 26, 2018)
Alana Creed: Timejumper
1. Fae Kissed
By Graceley Knox
The Wicked Kingdoms Series:
1. Mark of Truth
2. Crown of Betrayal
3. Throne of Secrets
4. Castle of Illusions (coming Summer 2018)
The Dragon Stone Saga:
1.Kiss of Frost
2.Up in Smoke (Coming Soon)
3.Shake the Ground (Coming Soon)
By D.D. Miers
The Relic Keeper Series
1.Dark Summoner
2.Dark Illusions (Coming Soon!)
3.Dark Secrets (Coming Soon!)
4.Dark Destiny (Coming Soon!)
Standalones:
City of Shadows: The Dark Fae Hollows
Wicked: The Isa Fae
About the Authors
USA Today bestselling authors, Graceley Knox and D.D. Miers may be long-lost sisters, but their moms continue to deny it. They are most definitely the co-writers of the Kresova Vampire Harem series, as well as a multitude of other upcoming projects they can't wait to share with readers.
Together they tend to share the same brain, finish each other's thoughts, laugh way too hard at inappropriate comments, drink enough coffee to qualify for an intervention, and talk about their fur babies. When they're not chatting, which is always, they can be found all over social media hanging out with their author friends and readers!
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Girl, Forsaken (Girl, Vampire Book 2) Page 17