Christy just stared at Maeve blankly. She blinked slowly and it reminded the Abbess that the girl was still in the afterglow and probably wasn't following their conversation very well. “Next time you can do that in private if you'd like. Or maybe with a special someone?”
A redness crept up Christy's cheeks. She stole a glance around at the few people still gathered around and then closed her eyes in mortification. “Oh good goddess, I just had my first orgasm in front of the whole world!”
Nathalia smiled at Maeve knowingly. Maeve put her arm around Christy, “Welcome to the club, honey.”
Chapter 8
“So a man...” Christy's eyes shot to Nathalia, knowing her tastes. “...or a woman can give me that same feeling when we have sex?”
“Maybe not that same feeling, but an orgasm, yes.” Maeve could only imagine the intensity of what Christy had just had coursing through her.
You told me you had been with a few boys. Nathalia prompted, needing to know what they were dealing with.
“I have been.” It was actually more than she'd admit. Some she wouldn't even admit to herself. Those weren't totally consensual and she blocked them out. “But it never felt like that. I told my friends I thought I had had some orgasms, but now...”
Maeve laughed. “If you aren't sure if you've had an orgasm, you haven't. Trust me, you'd know if you had.”
“I know now. Geez....that was crazy. It almost hurt.” Christy put her face in her hands again. “I know I was making the most horrible face. How can I stay here? I know everyone's going to be thinking about my stupid orgasm face every time they see me.”
We're used to it. There was nothing shocking about seeing yours. It was beautiful. Seeing it made the longing in Nathalia's heart more pointed. She missed seeing the beautiful agony of the female orgasm. She missed being with Maeve. Eiran Kafziel was many things, but he was not the type who could stomach sharing his mate. Nathalia had to deal with it.
“Maybe to you but those Guardian guys seemed shocked. I thought some of them liked me but..”
“They do like you. Some of them would LOVE to see that face on you again. They'd give anything to be the one to give it to you. ” Maeve and Nathalia exchanged glances. Some of them might even break the ban to get to Christy. She was going to stay with Libby and Leonard in their son, Billy's currently unoccupied room until they could get the Guardians settled back down. Christy wasn't just a witch. She was special, unique, maybe even a chosen of their great mother.
“You didn't see the look on their faces. Some of them looked angry.”
They weren't angry. You were right the first time; they were shocked. Not at what you did but what you said. You spoke of their ineffable god, their fathers' creator, by a secret name unknown even to them.
Christy just wished she could remember what she'd said.
***
Israel was fast and strong, inhumanly so. He enjoyed working at night. His vision was impeccable in the low light and he didn't have to think about moving slowly. The nursery was almost done and he was proud of it. How many city bred twenty four year old dee-jay's could say that? Couldn't be many.
Tank's voice in the dead of night startled him. “You work fast.”
Israel purposefully slowed his movements down. “Hey, Tank. Long time no see.”
Tank had stopped farther away than would normally be acceptable for conversation and whatever the reason Izzy was thankful. His ability to keep from shifting was improving but he could be effected if someones desires were strong enough. Nanae kept telling Izzy how impressed he was with the new Lilitu's restraint. That praise made Izzy want to continue to fight the pull of the power. It was strong and Izzy's body wanted to use.
“Are you tweaking?”
“I'm sorry, am I what?” Izzy knew what he meant but needed some time to consider his response.
“Meth, shard, speed, crank, coke, whatever. Are you on something? You build all night, up all day. You never sleep. You move fast and never sit still. You're nervous around people. You're practically a shut in. I've worked club security my whole life. I know the signs.”
“No, it's not that.” Izzy hesitated. He couldn't think of a viable fabrication. The signs did point to drug use now that Tank pointed them out.
“We've known each other a long time, man. You can tell me. I can help.”
“Camilla's exhausted and has so much to do before her maternity leave and Raphael has to be with her all the time to keep them both safe. There's just so much to do to get ready with the baby on the way and I'm the only one left to do them.”
Tank wasn't fully convinced but didn't force the issue. “I forgot you had one on the way. Congrats man.”
“Thanks.”
Tank let out a quick breath that could have been a laugh but it sounded too forced. “Your life is about to get more hectic. You should get your rest now while you can. The baby takes up every bit of my spare time. Mine and Marcie's.”
“Oh, shit, man. I forgot we have a baby in this annex already.” The boy's annex was far enough away from the main compound that Israel hadn't worried about the other babies, Genevieve and Juliet. He knew the noise would never reach that far. “I hope my building noise hasn't been keeping her awake. I didn't even think about it.”
“No. It's fine. Sophia is just like her mom. Once they fall asleep a tornado couldn't wake them. Her tummy is the only thing that wakes either of them up. She's still waking up to eat every 2 hours or so. She's a greedy little fatty. I guess she takes after her daddy a little after all.” Tank patted his stomach. It wasn't fat at all.
Izzy looked at the man he'd known so long. He was thick and solid, not as chiseled as Nanae but big with a more normal fat to muscle ratio. He was an attractive man and Israel started to feel the motivation to please him. What would Tank want? Did he have any secret desires? Marcie was short and petite. Izzy knew the head of Daughter's security wasn't gay, but maybe he harbored a secret longing for something different than his wife. Izzy started to wonder what it would feel like to have sex as a woman. Could he replicate a shape so well that he could actually fool someone's spouse? Not that he would want to but the thought of having a man like Tank making love to him as a tiny pixie like Marcie was seductive. How submissive he could be as her! Izzy wondered if he suddenly wanted Tank because of the man he was or the woman he could be.
“You like boys or girls?”
Stunned, Izzy just stared at Tank. How did he know what Israel had been thinking? Was it that obvious? Worried, Izzy looked down at his body. He was still himself. His thoughts had been his own, not reflections of Tank's desires. Israel couldn't change at will but was at the mercy of another until he was in full control of his new abilities. He stammered a bit trying to think of an answer. “I...uh...uh...”
Tank laughed for real this time. “I know the feeling. You want a boy but you're not supposed to say that. You're supposed to say something like, 'I don't care as long as it's healthy' or something about it having ten fingers and ten toes when all you can really think about is that one digit you're not supposed to care about.”
Oh, the baby. Of course Tank was talking about the baby. He had no idea Izzy's mind had wondered to more mature thoughts. It was Izzy's turn to laugh. Tank had wanted a boy. “You and Marcie are young. You'll get plenty more chances.”
“Not for us. I mean we could, but I don't really want to risk it. Marcie is so small and my babies are always going to be so big. This one almost killed her. After all these months, she still says she feels like baby Sophia almost tore her in half. She's taking a long time to get back to feeling normal. Down there.” Tank said the last two words quietly, almost silently.
Izzy heard them. He also heard the longing beneath them. Tank wanted his wife. This was about to get difficult for Israel. He concentrated on Camilla and Nanae like he'd been practicing. They wanted him just as he was. He could retain this form no matter what those around him wanted. He had to. Tank's next statement was said at a more
normal volume and they jolted Izzy out of his thoughts.
“Besides, one daughter is enough. I'm not sure I could handle protecting two.”
“She can't be that bad. I mean, how much trouble can a three month old get into?””
“It's not that. Sophie's an angel. I want to keep her that way and that's the hard part. Living here, she's got no chance of living a normal life. Marcie managed to break free but she was pulled back in. She's not active but I won't rest until I have them both away in a quiet safe cul-de-sac somewhere.”
Israel knew that a lot of men felt that way. Sex magic was not a popular subject with most fathers. He personally didn't have any issue with it. He knew there was no safer place than this compound, the most recent attack included. The men hadn't hurt any women or children. In fact, he knew that no child had ever come to any harm here. With the Daughters in charge, there were no abductions, molestations, or anything that kept parents up worrying at night. He steered the conversation away from the subject. “We're having a boy.”
“Good. You should take him as far away from the Daughters and Guardians as you can. It's your job to keep that baby boy safe.”
“This is our home. I could never take him away from Camilla and Raphael. He belongs with them and so do I.” He took a deep breath. He hadn't told anyone about their plans and didn't know why he was starting with this man, but Tank needed to hear. “We are in love and the three of us will protect our baby.”
Tank gave a look of disgust at Izzy's declaration that he probably didn't think the bisexual could see in the dark. He said something dismissive and walked away. He spoke under his breath when he had put enough distance between them that he knew Israel couldn't hear.
Izzy heard every word of the man's profanity. He was clearly not a fan of Izzy's lifestyle choice. That was his prerogative. Condemnation of his employer's choices were not. A man like that shouldn't be in charge of the Daughter's security. Izzy would have to talk to the Abbess about it.
Chapter 9
Sitting in the Abbess' office, Izzy knew he'd made a mistake coming without Camilla and Nanae. Tank had been right about the change in Izzy's behavior. Izzy had avoided seeing anybody since his change. He was unaware of his affect on people. He apparently exuded some kind of pheromone because everyone in the room was thinking sex. Tank hadn't exhibited any effects but they had been outside, not in closed quarters. The only thing saving him from using his ability now was that there were so many here with varying desires that his body had kind of locked in it's natural state.
The rooms Nathalia had used as her office and living space when she was Abbess had been taken over by Maeve, Aaron, baby Genevieve and her Guardian. Those rooms were converted to pure living space for the four of them. The office had been moved across the sanctuary to what they had used as a conference room before. It had more room, was still conveniently located and served very well. They needed an office with more space because, though Maeve was Abbess, she and Nathalia shared the tasks of that position. Maeve kept normal business hours here and she kept her baby with her. With Genevieve came her Guardian, the Nephilim named Samseil Maru. Aaron, Genevieve's dad and Maeve's mate, sometimes joined them but he was absent today. Nathalia was there and with her came her Nephilim, Kafziel Maru. Nanae called Nathalia the First and Genevieve the One. They were both something special to the Nephilim but he hadn't really said what. They were all involved with decisions that affected Daughters and Nephilim and so the much larger office was already crowded even before people came in to have audience with them.
The four of them stared at Izzy, waiting. The baby giggled and cooed at her Guardian. The handful of his cheek she had fisted in her little hand looked painful to Israel, but the Nephilim didn't seem to notice it at all. Genevieve could obviously do no wrong where Samseil Maru was concerned. Izzy knew that wasn't his real name. It meant Samseil's son. He had a secret true name that no one knew, just like Nanae was a name only used by Camilla and Izzy. Everyone else knew him as Raphael Maru.
When Izzy didn't speak, Nathalia started. I'm glad you're here, Israel. I've been meaning to talk to you.
That was a shock. Izzy couldn't remember Nathalia ever speaking to him. She had a thing about men. There was something weird about her voice and the way she moved her mouth but Izzy couldn't pinpoint what. He stammered, “You are?...You have?”
Yes. Congratulations on the baby. Camilla told us.
Israel relaxed a bit. He grinned. “Thanks.”
“How are the renovations coming?” Maeve asked. Of course she knew about them. She'd given permission for their construction.
“Great. The sun room went up easy.” He shrugged, playing off how proud he actually was of himself. “It was mostly a prefab. I just had to build the connection between it and the existing building. The nursery is more work only because I had to build everything from the ground up, but it's just a square room with a closet along one wall. There's no exterior exit and only two windows so I expect to be done soon before the baby is here next month.”
The pause and the looks between the two women were enough to tell him they didn't think the baby was his. The timing was wrong but could be easily explained. He didn't know how much he was supposed to know about the capacitors so he didn't just explain it. He excused it away. “That's why I expanded my apartments. I'm providing for my family. You must know that Camilla moved out of her room and in with me. When I finish the nursery, the baby will have his own room and Raphael has a room where he can get what he needs and still be close to us.”
“So Raphael lives in the sun room.” It wasn't said as a question but as an 'ah ha, that's what's going on over there' kind of statement. Kafziel's voice was like Nanae's in that it was mysterious and otherworldly, but it was different. Where there was only Nanae when Nanae spoke, Kafziel's voice contained two.
“Raphael lives with me and Camilla. We're all a committed family. My son has two fathers and one mother.”
Raphael cannot commit to you. He will abandon you both to cling to his Sinnis whenever we find her.
Israel hadn't expected disparagement here, certainly not from Nathalia. “You're wrong. We're committed to making this work. He loves us both.”
“If Raphael says he loves you then I believe him. We don't have a problem with unconventional family units. We'll do everything we can to protect you from those who do.” Maeve and Nathalia shared a look. Izzy didn't know what it meant but there was love there, longing between the two women.
Samseil spoke this time. “Our brother has not said such a thing. He has told me before that he will not allow himself to love again.” His voice was like Kafziel's, though deeper. Izzy could clearly hear that the second voice was Sam's beast. Somehow they cohabited in a way differently than Nanae and his beast. Where Nanae and his Hunger were separate beings that took turns using the same body, these Nephilim shared their body with their beasts, existing together.
“No, he hasn't said he loves us. He can't. We aren't allowed to make declarations of love. It always brings the beast to the surface. I've met it and we do everything we can to keep it down. It wants to hurt and destroy any source of love for Raphael.”
Genevieve started fussing and Sam took her to Maeve. Maeve used a cloth to cover as she nursed the baby while Sam stood nearby. “I can tell you from experience that there is no greater source of love than a baby. If what you say about the beast is true, Raphael will have to distance himself from you when your baby is born or risk the beast killing it. Even if he can't admit to himself that he loves you, then the beast will be able to tell he loves that kid.”
“Abbess, the beast can't hear Raphael's thoughts. He keeps it locked in a separate place where it can't get in his head.” The faces of the two Nephilim and Nathalia told Izzy he was telling them something they didn't already know. They clearly didn't understand the relationship between Nanae and his beast. Israel continued, “It can only see what he does and hear what he says out loud. It only comes out when threatened d
irectly or when Raphael is weakened. I've met it twice, once because Raphael allowed himself to become too hungry and once with my declaration of love. Camilla told me that she awoke it once with a hummed melody. She sings others all the time, just never that particular song. If his beast gets out, fear makes it stronger, strengthens it's hold. Genuine laughter sends it crawling back to it's dark hiding place. Camilla and I keep Raphe well fed and it sedated. Regular and frequent communion with Ud and Ki also help keep it imprisoned.” Exasperated by her blank face, Izzy spoke directly to Nathalia. “This seems, to me, to be something the First, the One, and their Nephilim should understand.”
Israel didn't plan or think what to do but he found his body in motion. The two giants advanced on him so quickly that Maeve, the only human in the room, missed the movement. Izzy jumped up to stand with one foot on the seat and the other on the back of the chair he had been sitting on. His weight and momentum brought the chair back. He rode it down and hooked his toes under it, flipping it into his hands before his soles hit the floor. He held it in front of him like a lion tamer and jabbed it at the two men who had stopped.
Kafziel's whole body seemed frozen in place. Samseil fought against the stone floor blocks that now encased his feet from the ankle down. Nathalia walked to Maeve and leaned down to look at the feeding infant. She brushed her hand over the cherub face and only Izzy saw her graze the soft skin of that beautiful mammary with her knuckles. Nathalia spoke to Izzy after the brief interlude with Maeve but this time she didn't bother to hide her ability. Her mouth didn't move. Nathalia put her words inside Israel's brain.
You know a lot about our mythology and burdens for an outsider. The things you are talking about so freely are not shared. Knowledge of Nephilim is power over them. They fear you. I do not. If I send them away, will you stay and speak with me? I have something to tell you and a question for you.
Ishtar Anomaly (books of Sinnis) Page 11