The Truth of Never (The Never Trilogy Book 3)
Page 14
I didn't think we ever had a chance of having a great relationship, but at least we would know about each other and be present to some degree in each other's lives. My father wasn't here anymore, so now more than ever, I wanted her to be around. I wanted her to come through for me this time and remain even though it was hard, unlike the way she'd been unable to in the past. I took a step closer and sat on the chair beside her. There were so many machines that were connected to her, all working to keep her alive. Leaning forward, I softly placed my hand on hers, my gut twisting with anguish.
Please stay. I'll forgive you but please, just stay.
Now that my dad had explained what had happened between them, I was more understanding of her. It still didn't completely excuse her decisions, but I'd done something similar with Nora thirteen years earlier. I might have been able to convince myself in the past that it wasn't the same thing but it was. One party had left out of self-preservation, but had convinced themself that it was for the greater good of the other person. It was the same thing; the only difference was in the scales.
I leaned closer to her as I stroked the hand that had held me so many times while I was growing up. I had her blue eyes and as I stared at her face, I wanted another chance to stare into them. I bowed my head and prayed that she'd be alright. However a few minutes later, I heard someone come in. I turned to see Damian at the door.
"What are you doing here?" He asked, and I frowned at him.
"What do you mean what am I doing here?"
"Are you trying to fucking test me?"
He took a step back to clear the doorway. "Before I do something that we’ll both regret for the rest of our lives, get the fuck out of here."
“I'm not going anywhere until I'm ready to. She's my mother."
"Oh so now you know she’s your mother." He mocked. "but when you left her to die on the road, it didn’t occur to you then."
My head snapped to him. "What did you just say?" I asked and got up.
"You heard me you bastard." He said.
"Say that again." I told him, but just as he was about to repeat it I punched him, and then pulled him out of the room. This would be our third fight in a few weeks and I couldn't have cared less. I understood him, we were in the same boath but what pissed me off was how inconsiderate he was. How he could say those words to me knowing that they would hit home, and how painful it would be.
So I fought him without holding back, needing to dispel some of the anger I felt. He was a good match for me so there was no need to feel sorry for anyone. But all too soon the fight ended as people came to separate us.
"Let me go!" He yelled, so furious that his eyes had turned red. Me, I wasn’t even sure I wanted to be alive anymore. I shrugged the hands that were restraining me off and started to walk away. "If I see you or any of your bastard brothers here again, I will end you with my own hands." He threatened, his voice echoing through the hallway. "I swear it upon her life. Do you hear me? Do you fucking hear me?"
I did, as clear as day and it meant absolutely nothing to me. My brothers had probably seen her back in Portugal and since Brandon was in New York he had probably come by too. But I wouldn't have known since I'd refused to let anyone contact me. I went to my car and sat in it for a few seconds, then suddenly, my throat closed up and I couldn't breathe. I didn't even bother reaching for the door handle to get out because I wanted how I felt inside to be physically manifested. I struggled, my heart pounding furiously, and the feeling of nausea polluting my entire body. My vision turned blurry and I grabbed the steering wheel for dear life until it felt like I was going to pass out.
Then I fought with the door handle and eventually it budged. I flew out of the car and thrust myself against the side of the next vehicle, fighting for air. I inhaled big gulps of it into my lungs, my entire body trembling, and eventually just sunk to the floor. When I had calmed down enough, the tears poured down my face again. I wanted to yell out my pain but I held it back.
It felt like I'd lost control over everything, especially myself, and I was terrified. My heart refused to slow down and my breathing remained irregular. The moment I got back into the car, I put my seat belt on and drove to Tribeca. When I reached Nora's building, I found my way to her office and met her secretary.
"Where's Miss Baker?" I asked and she immediately got up.
"She's in a meeting now but I'll tell her..."
"I need to see her now. I just need a few minutes. Tell her it'll be for just a few minutes."
"I can't..."
"Please!" I half yelled and only managed to hold myself back.
"Please wait here." She said, terrified and pointed towards one of the seats in the reception. To appease her, I sat down but the moment she left, I got up again and leaned against the wall. I focused on calming myself down and evening out my breathing before Lenora arrived. I needed her and that what was all I could think about. That was all I wanted to think about at that moment. I needed her to pull me back to the ground.
Lenora
The meeting had been going on for less than ten minutes, but I could barely take my eyes off the ring on my finger.
Twice now, Carlie and Elisa had caught me. No one else knew what was going on except them so we were the only ones with smiles on our faces in a room filled with serious executives. Just then there was a knock on the door and Dorothy walked in. She came towards me and bent down to whisper something in my ears.
"Mr Roque is waiting for you" she said and that surprised me.
"What?"
"He doesn't seem okay. He says he needs just a few minutes with you. I'm scared, should I call security?"
"No!" I told her and immediately pushed my chair back. "Please excuse me I'll be right back.” I said to the room and walked out with her. I found myself hurrying towards my office and the moment I walked in and saw him resting against the wall, my heart dropped into my stomach. I stopped as he turned to me. His eyes were red and his hair was a mess as if he'd been pulling it all the way here.
"Don't let anyone into my office until I say so." I told Dorothy and immediately went towards him. I took his hand and pulled him along with me into my office. I turned the lock on the door the moment I walked in and turned to him.
"What's going on?" I started to ask but instantly he pulled me into his arms and crushed me in a suffocating hug.
I didn't say a word. I just held him as tightly as I could and waited for him to calm down. I could feel the irregularity of his breathing, and the pounding of his heart as it thumped loudly inside his chest. I closed my eyes and cradled his head against my neck. Eventually he let go of me and tried to force a smile but it was so empty. "I'm sorry, I'm okay." He said and that was when I noticed the small cut at a corner of his mouth.
"What happened?" I asked.
"It's nothing, don't..."
"Nathan," I called sternly and he stopped.
"I went to the hospital to see my mother." He said and instantly my hands dropped from his shoulders. He knew? How did he find out?
Thankfully he didn't notice how startled I'd gotten so he continued. "Damian Bach was there and we got into a fight."
"Elizabeth is my mother." He told me. "You’re surprised right?" He asked and I found myself nodding.
"H-how did you find out?"
"I searched for her. About ten years ago. I can ignore things easily but I can’t stand not knowing. I'm sorry... Your secretary told me you were in a meeting. You can go back. I just...”
I went towards him and kissed him. Somehow I'd suspected that he knew who she was but I hadn’t allowed myself to be fully convinced as I didn’t see how he would be able to handle it. Now I understood what his hiatus had been about. So much had happened to him and all at once. My heart was breaking for him. The kiss wasn't a soft one and I didn’t have to do much for him to respond. We both needed this.
I pulled on his shirt and when he realized what I wanted, he lifted his arms and took it off. I turned and his hands instantly
went to my zipper, his lips on my neck as he held it and pulled it down. When my arms were free I wrapped them around his neck while he focused on sliding the dress down my body. I pressed myself against him, and with his hands around my stomach he pressed my backside against his hardness. I slipped out of my dress and shoes, then turned around and leapt on to him. He caught me; with one hand underneath my bum to support my weight and with the other, he unsnapped my bra. By the time his back had reached the edge of my desk, I'd pulled it out of my arms and flung it away.
I slipped my tongue into his mouth and drank him in. He did the same and then left my lips to trail kisses down my neck. Everything was going fast and soon he had my breast in his mouth. My back automatically arched in response, so I held on to his head as a moan escaped my lips. I continued to rock myself against him as he continued with his assault until I couldn't take the teasing anymore. Without even looking at what I was doing my hand went to his belt buckle and began to unfasten it. He stopped when he saw that I needed some room to work so he lifted me up, but I immediately protested.
That made him laugh and the sound was like music to my ears. He straightened and turned with me so he could lay me on the table but then stopped.
"Why the fuck do you have a glass table?" He asked. "Wasn't there any wood when you went shopping?"
I threw my head back and laughed as he looked around to find somewhere else.
"I think it's sturdy enough to hold us."
"You've got to be joking. You obviously don't realize the work out you're about to have."
"Let's use the couch." I said and turned towards the blood red sofa by the corner but he shook his head. "Too steep. I need a flat surface.”
I left him to figure out the dilemma on his own and took his lips in mine, trailing kisses down his neck. Eventually I felt my back gently hit the wall, and I lifted my head.
"Will this do?" I teased.
"I'll make it work." He said and slightly bent his knees so that I could hook my thighs around his. After making sure my arms were secured around him he let me go so that I could fall low against the wall and have enough access to his jeans. He continued his assault on my breast so I was forced to find my way with my head thrown back and my eyes closed.
Eventually, the belt came undone so I gripped his zipper and pulled it down. My hands instantly slipped inside his briefs and grabbed him. A low moan escaped his lips while a wicked smile appeared on mine. Holding onto his shoulders, I unhooked my thighs from his and dropped to my knees but he stopped me.
"Nora I can't wait,’ he groaned. “I need to be inside you."
"Okay," I panted, and stood up. “but I can.”
He gazed at me, and then began to chuckle.
"On your knees.” I said and he immediately went down.
"Yes ma’am.” He replied and after pulling down my panties, he lifted one of my legs to swing across his shoulder. There was no time to feel shy because immediately he leaned forward, and the moment his mouth touched me, a gasp loud enough to probably be heard outside the office escaped my lips.
I held onto his head, my eyes rolling into the back of my head as he showed me what ecstasy truly felt like. The previous night was amazing but in the light of today, I was sure that somehow he had held back. When he was done driving me out of my mind, he rose again and lifted me up against the wall. With our eyes fixated on each other, he drove himself into me with one swift thrust. I gripped his head, feeling myself tremble from the quakes of pleasure that were rocking my entire body.
He slightly bent his knees and started pounding in and out of me, and it was anything but slow. With his hand firmly planted on the walls beside my head I held onto his neck and rode him as hard as I could. We both needed this, to be overwhelmed by the magic that two people who had carved a place for each other in their hearts could create.
With each thrust I came closer to losing my mind as I tried to match his ferocity. He had completely lost himself in what was happening between us, and for me to not only be able to give him that but to be the only one in the world who could, even if it was for just a few minutes was more than I was able to process. I forgot about myself and focused on him and in the process I got more than I bargained for.
When I finally exploded around him, it was with a scream. He came with me and immediately covered his mouth with mine to stifle it. I heard his curses and groans somewhere in the distance and I could only hope that the world outside was oblivious to what was going on in here.
Tears rushed to my eyes as I quaked against him. I held onto him as tightly as I could, refusing to let go and he allowed me. We remained like that for quite a while. For how long exactly, I had no idea but it didn't matter. At that moment, nothing else mattered. Eventually we calmed down, knowing we had to pull apart even though we both didn’t want to. But then a knock sounded on the door and with it the reminder of where we were, and how inappropriate the entire situation was.
He released his hold on me and pulled out, but kept his arms around me just in case the strength had not returned to my legs. It was a good call because the moment my legs touched the floor, they instantly weakened and almost sent me to the ground.
Laughing, he caught me and held me up until he was sure that I was stable.
The knock came again and I want to yell at whoever it was to go to hell. Nathan kissed me and then gave me a hug. "Thank you." He whispered in my ear. "You're my angel."
I blushed and pushed him slightly away so that I could gather my things from the floor. I found my panties, quickly slipped them on while he gave me my bra. He put his clothes back on and then brought my dress to me. He opened it up so I could slip my feet into it, and then brought it up to my chest. I slipped my arms into the dress and turned so that he could zip me up.
"You don't have a restroom in here do you?" He asked and I shook my head.
"That's down the hallway."
"We have to think up a solution since this is going to be happening a lot in the near future."
"I'll take care of myself when you've gone. I have some wipes for you though, do you need any?" I asked and was about to head towards my desk when he pulled me back and drew into my arms.
"I don't need them. I'm going home now and plus I love the scent of you on me."
For some reason I felt extremely shy as I stared into his eyes, so I lowered my head.
"We’re not teenagers anymore you know." He said, and I shoved his shoulder lightly. "I know that."
"You'll get used to it." He said and kissed me deeply. The knock sounded again and this time with a threat to break the door down. Of course it was Carlie, and she kept asking if I was okay. No doubt Dorothy had exaggerated Nathan's state to her.
"I'm fine Carlie." I called out but I doubted she heard me.
"How do you feel?" I asked and cradled his face in my hands.
"Better,” he replied. “What about you?"
"I still feel we could have gone another round." I said and he laughed again. I loved hearing the sound so much. "We’ll discuss that at home." He told me and kissed me again.
"Please be alright." I told him. “And call me immediately if anything's wrong or if you just feel like talking. I'm here for you."
"I still can't believe I have you." He said and gave me one last kiss before he put his shirt on.
"Time to go. Sorry for interpreting your meeting." He said.
"It's fine." I told him as he backed away towards the door.
"Don't forget your shoes." He pointed out and I nodded realizing that I was still barefoot.
"And you didn't tell me what you thought about your ring:"
"I'll do that over dinner tonight."
"What do you want to eat? Do you want to go out?"
"No, I want to stay in with you. Text me some options later."
"Okay." He said and turned around to unlock the door but just before he pulled it open he glanced at me and said. "And remember you owe me."
At first I didn't understand w
hat he meant but when I caught the mischievous glint in his eyes I understood.
"You lost that chance," I said and he stopped.
"Don't play with me right now." He said
"Really? What are you going to do about it?" I asked, wanting him to come back. His lips quirked into the sexiest grin I’d ever seen, and it made me feel like I was melting. "You don't want to get back to work do you?" He asked. I shook my head.
"I really don't."
"We’ll establish some rules at home." He said and pulled the door open.
"I love you." He mouthed, and I mouthed it back.
Carlie and Elisa rushed towards my door then but stepped aside when they saw him. While they were acting shy with him, I remembered my shoes and hurried to pick them up. By the time they came into the room and closed the door, I had thrown the shoes under my desk and was settling down on my chair. Elisa came over and took a seat in front of me. Carlie refused to sit down.
"First of all where did it happen? Chair? Table? Where? I need to know where to avoid."
"What are you talking about?" I asked innocently.
"Are you kidding me? Your hair is a mess and your whole office reeks of sex."
"Are you serious?" I asked and turned to Elisa.
"Elisa is that true?"
"Please don't ask me." She said. "This is already too weird. I knew you both when you were kids."
I rolled my eyes at her while Carlie took her seat. "First of all, the ring."
"Are you crazy?” Elisa asked. "Who cares about the ring? How was he? Was this the first time?"
I thought this was too weird for you.
“It is but… it’s Nathan. I’m curious.”
"If I answer you will you immediately move on from this topic?"
"I will." Elisa said.
"No, it was last night, and he's great."
"Okay, but how great?"
"Why the hell do you want to know that? And you just told me you’ll move on from the topic if I answered you."