by Lea Griffith
More is a work of fiction. Names, places, and incidents either are products of the author’s imagination or are used fictitiously. Any resemblance to actual events, locales, or persons, living or dead, is entirely coincidental.
A Loveswept eBook Original
Copyright © 2015 by Lea Griffith
Excerpt from Never Enough by Lea Griffith copyright © 2015 by Lea Griffith
All rights reserved.
Published in the United States of America by Loveswept, an imprint of Random House, a division of Random House LLC, a Penguin Random House Company, New York.
LOVESWEPT is a registered trademark and the LOVESWEPT colophon is a trademark of Random House LLC.
This book contains an excerpt from the forthcoming book Never Enough by Lea Griffith. This excerpt has been set for this edition only and may not reflect the final content of the forthcoming edition.
eBook ISBN 9780553394535
Cover design: Georgia Morrissey
Cover photograph: Wallenrock/Shutterstock
www.readloveswept.com
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Contents
Cover
Title Page
Copyright
Prologue
Chapter 1
Chapter 2
Chapter 3
Chapter 4
Chapter 5
Chapter 6
Chapter 7
Chapter 8
Chapter 9
Chapter 10
Chapter 11
Chapter 12
Chapter 13
Chapter 14
Chapter 15
Chapter 16
Chapter 17
Chapter 18
Chapter 19
Chapter 20
Chapter 21
Chapter 22
Chapter 23
Epilogue
By Lea Griffith
Dedication
Acknowledgments
About the Author
The Editor’s Corner
Excerpt from Never Enough
Prologue
THREE YEARS AGO
Excitement thrummed through Ruthie’s body, matching the rhythm of the music coming from Tobias’s house and setting fire to her blood. She could taste him in her mouth, feel his hands on her skin, and smell him with every deep inhale. He was a part of her now. She wasn’t going to be able to shake Tobias Edwards.
She’d had Stanton bring her here tonight. Tobias had asked her to wait for him, told her he had business to attend for her brother, Jeremiah, and then he’d come to her. He’d called her on his way home, so she knew his approximate arrival time at her apartment, but Ruthie was so primed to tell him her decision she’d been unable to wait for him to come to her.
So here she was, walking up his drive, Stanton at her side. She prayed he couldn’t feel her trembling. Tobias’s house sat on a large wooded lot about thirty minutes outside Atlanta. She’d fretted the entire drive, worried about how she’d decided to put her plan in motion.
The wind blew the treetops, leaves crinkling beneath her feet. It was autumn, and the nights cooled quickly. She drew in a deep breath, letting the crisp air soothe her.
There was so much she had to show him tonight; so much she wanted to give and take in return. She was determined to push past her own fears. She craved Tobias with a bone-deep conviction. It was time to show him she was everything he needed. It was time to submit to him on every level.
“Here we are. You’re sure you want me to leave, Miss Copeland?” Stanton asked with a catch in his voice.
She cocked her head, trying to decipher the hesitation in his voice. “Stanton, that’s my man in there. I think I got this,” she murmured.
“Yes, ma’am,” he replied, a smile in his voice as he stepped aside.
Ruthie reached up, feeling her way along the brick exterior before she found the alarm pad and punched in the code. The locks disengaged. Anticipation raced over her skin, heightening the tension between her legs and beading her nipples.
There was a tremor in her thighs, and she pressed a hand to her stomach as she took a deep breath. Tobias had waited for her, telling her over and over that kink wasn’t something he had to have. He loved everything about her, insisting he would never demand submission—he was content to simply be with her any way she’d let him.
His admission voiced that she was enough. But always in his tone was a thread of need, a profound resonance that told her he was lying to them both. He needed more. His muscles would lock around her, protective and loving, but even as he was deep inside her body he held a piece of himself back. Ruthie wondered if it was because Tobias doubted she could be as strong as he needed her to be.
She stopped at the edge of the foyer and listened. The bass of the music hit her ears and slid into her body, riveting her nerves and making the fire in her veins slither along her skin. They’d danced around his needs for far too long. Ruthie was blind, not stupid. She knew her man, felt the desire in him to let loose on her body and demand she give him all that she was by submitting to his dominance.
Ruthie had talked to Candace for weeks now, trying to determine if that echo in her heart and mind was submission. Could she give over everything when she’d worked so hard to become strongly independent and not need anyone?
The answer was simple—with Toby she could. It was instinct. That longing to hand him everything and let him carry her body, her needs and wants, in his hands had turned pressing. Candace told her being a submissive wouldn’t make her weak, it would make her stronger, and that within that strength lived a lust to give over to her Dominant and let him rule her pleasure. Silence her mind and take her places she dared not let herself go alone. Toby was strong enough to do that for her. The knowledge had always been in her heart; it had just taken her brain a while to catch up.
Candace assured her Tobias was an experienced Dominant, well versed in the ways of BDSM play. He’d studied the lifestyle under Candace’s husband’s tutelage and had been a practicing Dom for many years. She’d laughed when Ruthie growled. Damn but Ruthie hadn’t liked hearing her man had played others. Yet she recognized she had no true claim to that irrational anger and called it what it was: jealousy.
Her conversation with Candace had validated her thoughts and eased her fears. Vanilla sex with Tobias was amazing, but there was more to be had, and damn it, Ruthie was going to demand it. And here she was.
Tobias was going to fight her on it—but he wouldn’t win. He might be a true Dom, but she held the power in her submission. Once the idea had taken root, it had been a no-brainer to take what she wanted and give him what he needed in return.
The music began to fade, and the CD changer hummed as it switched disks. Ruthie heard water running in the kitchen, then the thud of the refrigerator closing, and she took a deep breath. Soft footfalls announced his arrival. Heat at her back, a muscular arm wrapping around her waist, pulling her into his hard body, and then his lips on her neck had her heart skipping a beat.
“Hey, baby,” he murmured. “Told you I was coming to you.”
“I couldn’t wait,” Ruthie said with a sigh. “I missed you. Jeremiah said you’re going out of town this weekend, and I wanted to make sure I had plenty of time with you before then.”
His lips nipped at her skin, teeth sinking into the flesh beneath her ear and biting just enough for her to gauge his mood. Her man was wound tight tonight. “I’m heading to Italy Saturday—shipping business. Jeremiah wants to secure space in the Port of Naples. I’ll be gone about a week or so.” He squeezed her and chuckled. “You’re impatient, but I can’t fault you—it’s the same for me,” he told her as he tilted her head with his free hand and began nuzzling her jaw.
Ruthie shivered and relaxed against him. She was a tall
woman at five eight, and he towered over her, well over six feet of solid temptation. It was no small thing that his every move seemed protective and geared toward ensuring her comfort.
“Tobias?”
“Mmm-hmm,” he hummed as he continued to lick and nuzzle her skin.
“I want you.” It came out a breathy whisper when what she wanted to do was shout it to the rafters.
He stilled, muscles tensing under her palms. Ruthie twined her hands with his, turning in the circle of his arms before she lifted her face and smiled up at him. He pushed a stray strand of hair off her face before he traced her lips with the pad of his thumb.
She flicked a tongue out and licked the digit. His breath hissed in, and she was back to smiling. She wielded so much feminine power in that moment, it was an aphrodisiac all its own.
“I ache for you,” she murmured as she braced her hands on his chest, went on tiptoe, and licked across his lips.
He remained a rock, unmoving, but his heart beneath her hands threatened to beat out of his chest.
“I want to give you all of me, Tobias. I’m ready,” she affirmed, unable to quell the tremor in her voice.
“Ruthie—”
There was a warning in his tone, and she hastened to cut him off. “I know who you are, Tobias. I feel you holding back—even when you’re wrapped around me, touching me, inside me, I feel your restraint. I know you’ve sacrificed a big part of who you are to be with me. What I don’t know is why.”
“Baby, now’s not the time—”
He was going to try and shut her down. Not today, she told herself. “There is no better time,” she said as she stepped back and slowly unbuttoned her calf-length cashmere coat.
She shrugged it off her shoulders, reveling in the chilly air kissing her exposed parts. Her hair slid down her back, the cool strands against her heated skin making her shiver anew. She’d worn an emerald-green corset that laced in the front and cut deeply in the back. Candace had helped her pick it out—telling her the color looked amazing against the backdrop of her creamy skin. Thong, thigh-highs, and stilettos completed the ensemble.
Tension radiated from Tobias, and it was affirmation. He needed this as much as she did. Instinct guided her now. Submission. The flavor of the word hovered on her tongue, sweet and ambitious.
Ruthie lowered to her knees.
Every move should be a symphony, Candace told her, a prelude to the gift she was giving her Dom. A thrill sliced through her abdomen, making her pussy clench. She locked her hands behind her back, spread her legs, and sat back on her heels as she lowered her head.
“What the fuck, Ruthie,” he ground out.
“I am yours to do with what you will. But do not deny me, Tobias. Do anything but deny me.”
Her voice reverberated in the room. Even the music complied with the demand in her tone, the song ending as another disk slid home and the strains of “I Want You” by Marvin Gaye began floating through the air.
Tobias stepped back, and her heart stuttered. What if he denied her? What if she took this step and he didn’t take it with her?
Ruthie had long ago decided no half-measures. Her blindness prevented many joys, and she would be damned if she’d let anything or anyone steal a moment from her. Now that she recognized what she needed and desired to give him, Tobias would reciprocate or she’d step away and take nothing at all.
He walked around her slowly, his steps a dance of seduction. Ruthie shivered, and he laughed, low and sexy.
“I don’t think you know what you’re asking for, Ruthie. I don’t know that you understand what I want to do to your body, to your soul.” His voice was rough and infinitely deep.
Still he circled her, a taunt. This was about control, dominance. His intent tingled over her skin, brushing her mind and softening her body.
So many things she wanted him to do to her. She could only imagine the places he would take her—the heights she could scale in his arms. He already played her body expertly, but the thought of going even higher through a Dom/sub dynamic? She swallowed hard and then stilled when Tobias trailed a single finger down her throat to the top of her breast.
Candace had introduced Ruthie to floggers, whips, crops, hoods, and clamps. As Ruthie stroked the leather of the flogger, her stomach had somersaulted, and she’d been forced to breathe through her desire. Her friend had laughed knowingly. That’s how she’d finally made her decision—touching the flogger, she’d known it could bring her peace in the hands of the right man.
Tobias was that man. She wanted the thud of his flogger on her back, her thighs, and her breasts. She craved the feel of his hand, or his paddle, on her ass. She needed the sting of nipple clamps, the brush of his ropes. She had to have Tobias deep inside her body, taking her apart and putting her back together. She wanted to fly. Ruthie desired all the things she couldn’t see but needed with a bone-shredding intensity. This was the beginning.
He squatted in front of her, his woodsy scent soothing her even as his heat enticed. “Do you know what I want, Ruthie?”
Her mind quieted. It was eerie how everything inside of her responded to his tone. She remained silent.
He grabbed her chin and lifted her face. “I asked you a question.”
“Y-you didn’t give me permission to speak,” she stammered.
“I never told you that you couldn’t,” he said softly. “You have to know the rules he plays by, Ruthie, before you present yourself to a Dom.”
“Not just any Dom…you,” she responded heatedly.
He stood then and cursed. “You don’t know what you’re asking of me, Ruthie.”
She quelled her fears and doubts, silencing them with a sharp command. She needed Tobias. It was that simple. “I know what I’m asking for, Tobias. I’m asking for you—all the pieces you’ve kept from me. All the things you’ve hidden because you think I can’t handle your lusts.”
He sighed. Capitulation? It was a rarity, but she mourned the loss of her sight at that moment—she’d give nearly everything she owned to stare into his eyes right then.
“Ruthie, you’re precious to me,” he began and then stopped.
The fear returned, vicious and cutting, doing its best to erode her confidence. “I want everything or nothing at all.”
Even though she whispered, her declaration was loud, and she heard the indrawn hiss of his breath. “Ruthie. I can’t do this right now.”
“Can’t what? Take what you want, what you need from me? I’m here, Tobias. I know what you expect, and I need to take this step with you.”
He stood behind her, and his big hand wrapped in her hair. He tugged and her head fell back. His other hand covered her jaw as he shifted to a knee, his mouth covering hers, tongue diving deep.
It was hard, wet, and so damn sexy Ruthie moaned into his mouth. He bit her lip, then soothed the sting with his tongue. He pulled harder on her hair, and she relaxed, allowing it; indeed, reveling in it. His kiss became firmer, his touch on her jaw more demanding as he held her mouth open for his wet caress.
“Goddamn it, you’re beautiful,” he said in a gravelly voice as he raised his head.
She sighed.
“I have needs, Ruthie, you cannot imagine. I must have the control, but what you do to me, it’s beyond anything I’ve experienced. I want to sink inside you and never come out. I want to mark you with my flogger, leave bite marks on your skin, and lick them all better so you’ll know where I’ve tasted. I want to tie you down with my ropes so when you squirm from the pleasure you can’t go anywhere. I want to fuck you in front of other people, make you scream my name so everybody knows who you belong to. You make me crazed with this insane lust to possess you.”
“I am yours, Tobias. Yours,” she affirmed.
“It would hurt so good, Ruthie.” In his voice was his struggle.
But those words were a promise, and for a second Ruthie thought she’d won. Then he released her roughly, rose, and stepped away.
“You can’t
handle what I want to do to you.” His words lowered like a gauntlet, and she wanted to weep.
Ruthie let her head fall forward as a tear leaked from her eye. The heat of its track matched the firebrand poker embedded in her heart. He was denying her.
Candace had warned her about this. Tobias was a dark man with dark needs. Her friend had seen him in scenes, and the demons riding him brought an exquisite pleasure/pain to the women he submitted. Her friend had cautioned that Tobias might love her too much to visit his darkness on her. She’d done her best to prepare Ruthie for anything and everything, including his rejection.
As the silence became overwhelming, Marvin Gaye’s voice faded out, leaving only Ruthie’s rough breaths rebounding through the room. Candace’s words were a cacophony in her head now.
“I love you,” she said softly. It wasn’t a plea, it was the truth, and if he wouldn’t let her give him anything else, she’d give him that.
“I know,” he returned in a voice tinged with bitter regret.
“Show me, Tobias. Show me who you are. Let me be what you need,” she demanded.
“It’s too much for you. You can’t handle my lusts or my dominance. You would try, but the simple truth is I would want more. I would break the sweetness in you, Ruthie, and that would kill me,” he said in a low tone.
More. The word sliced her so deeply she wondered if she was bleeding out on his floor.
“I came here to give you all I am and feel—my hopes, dreams, desires…” She trailed off as the pain washed over her, taking her breath.
He was in front of her again, on his knees now, his ragged breaths blowing the hair off her face. “What I feel for you goes beyond anything I’ve ever felt for anyone else. I make love to you, Ruthie. Worship your body with the soft kisses and gentle touches it deserves,” he murmured so low she struggled to hear him. “You’re asking me to visit things on you—fuck, Ruthie, I can’t do it.”