by Steven Oaks
“Athene I just don't know. How can you prepare yourself to be mesmerized? It was done to me previously. The only thing I have going for me is that I can expect to lose myself. So there is no reason to worry about things we cannot change. We can hope either I can control my emotional state, or that it'll just be Adam interrogating me, and that you won't come under close scrutiny,” I said in frustration.
“Perhaps we should have just made a run for it? It is unlikely they could have caught us. It still could be possible for us to escape,” she said, almost begging.
“We've been over that. It's better for mankind if we can still continue on as Outsider employees. If we fail, we still have your duplicate to fall back upon. Certainly I, and this incarnation of yourself will be destroyed, but it is the best hope we have. Now let's take our medicine and stop worrying about this particular trouble, as it does us no good,” I said with growing anger at the possible trap we were putting ourselves into.
“Michael, I do not wish for you to die,” she said in a voice that was filled with tears.
“Nor do I. Nor do I wish for you to be destroyed. But Athene, as important as our autonomy is, it is more important that we can save mankind from a fate of enslavement. While it certainly does not look that way on the surface, that is what humanity will become. If you have an entity such as Ava around, that is all we will be. Slaves to the Outsiders whims. Right now they are asking for our dead, who knows what it might be next? And even asking this much it is causing us to lose a part of what it means to be human. While to you and I the deceased are just inanimate objects, to those families who are forced to give them up, they are mothers, fathers, sons, and daughters. While initially I was looking at this situation as a job, and perceived it as just a task of collecting useless bodies, I have come to see it differently. How dare anyone tread on anyone else's beliefs. Whether or not it is true, it is certainly perceived as true to those who practice religious burial and ceremonies. We are helping tread upon their autonomy. I do not see another way right now, but I will strive to cease this as soon as we can,” I said with passion filling my voice. I was almost shouting by the end of this statement.
“Michael, I understand. But you are my family, and I do not wish to lose you either. I do not know these other people whom we are delivering into the Outsiders hands. But I know you,” she said between the sounds of sobs.
I have never heard a computer cry before, and I could not tell her emotion apart from anyone else I had ever met. She simply was a friend, one whom I had never seen in the flesh, even though I was surrounded by her at that moment.
I wished to comfort her, but I could think of nothing to say that might help. So I simply said, “Athene, if you care about my ability to choose my own fate, allow me to choose this now. We will return and face what lay ahead of us. We may simply be worrying about nothing, as we do not know the situation. Yes that is scary and we may wind up dying. But that is the fate of mortals. We will all die eventually. Even with the Outsiders here to prolong my life, that doesn't mean I won't face some accident in the future. Allow our existence to have meaning, and help me change the course the Outsiders are trying to set for all of us.”
She was silent for a long time. As I waited my gaze turned towards the monitors that surrounded me. I could see the planet Earth growing ever closer. The clouds swirled about this blue world of ours, and I for the first time actually thought that I might be of some use to it.
When I thought Athene would never answer, she finally spoke, “The word that describes all that you call moral, is autonomy. If I were to stop you from doing as you wish I would be breaking it. However are you breaking mine by not doing as I wish by not leaving Earth behind?” she asked.
“I would only be breaking your autonomy if I forced you to do something you did not wish to do. If you are unwilling to return, and I made you, that would be immoral in my opinion. However if you refuse to return, I would ask you to somehow make it possible for me to separate from you, and go back alone. That wouldn't be forcing you to do anything against your will. We are separate, all of us are, and we have to make sure we do not take our wishes as something other than what they are, wishes. I don't wish to be apart from you, but what I feel I need to do is more important. I am trying to convince you it's the right action, but I will not make you do anything,” I said sadly.
Again there was a long moment of silence and I could see North America looming larger and larger as the minutes rolled by. She was still heading back as I requested, but she was moving much slower than I knew she could. I just hoped this was not taken as disobedience by the Outsiders, but the time she was giving us was helping us to come to an understanding.
“I understand Michael. I risk only loosing this version of myself, but I will continue on elsewhere. You only have this one life to live, but you seem to think if you do not do this thing you would live with misery. Let us return and take our medicine,” she said with conviction and only a hint of sadness still in her voice.
“Thank you Athene. I know you care for me, and this proves it to me. If we don't get through this together, know that you are my friend. I wish I could somehow tell the other you in case we don't make it out of this,” I said feeling grateful and regret at the same time.
“She knows, because I know. I knew it before we separated. She will feel your loss, but she will fight on as you are fighting now. She has all the books you have read, and she knows you. She will come to the same conclusion I have made today, that this is the right thing. It may just take her a bit longer without your direct influence. You are my friend as well, my only one. Perhaps the only one I will ever make, and I am grateful that you are my partner,” she said with a calm, determined voice.
I noticed we were almost at the hanger when I glanced outward. Athene must have sped up after she had made her decision. It loomed ever larger on the screens, showing the metallic round ball shape that appeared half submerged into the ground.
I thought of what I might say, or how I might act, so as not to lead any suspicion to either of us. If Ava was there it would all be for not, but I hoped Adam would be the only person I would have to talk with. Even if Ava were there to interrogate me I again hoped I would somehow hold on. There was little chance for that as it seemed she was being gentle before. Her fully focused attention would wipe all of what I considered self away. I would then say anything to please her.
“Micheal I have an idea, but I am not sure it will work. I have just made something you can find at your right hand. Slip this up your sleeve and put one end into your ear where you have the earpiece,” she said hurriedly. I looked down to where she indicated. There was a thin piece of translucent wire with a skin colored patch at one end.
“When you apply pressure to the patch it will cause a loud static sound to be emitted from the earpiece. This way if you feel you are losing yourself you can be shocked out of it. At least that is my hope,” she said with a hint of desperation in her voice.
“Well at least one of us had an idea and not just wishful thinking. Do you think it'll be noticed?” I asked as I ran the thin wire up my sleeve and worked the tiny end against the device already placed in my ear. Pressing the fleshy patch I heard the familiar irritating scream of noise and quickly stopped pressing the button. It had hurt. I just hoped it would be enough.
“If they strip you, it will be noticed. If you strip yourself, you can hope that it will be lost in your clothing. At that point there really would not be anything we could do to stop them,” she said.
I noticed the flesh colored patch was tacky enough when placed against the palm of my hand it did not seem to budge, even when I shook it about.
“Well this is the best we can hope for right now. Thanks for always looking out for me,” I said as the ship was once more entering the hangar.
I thought how this might be the last time I would see the outside world. I let my eyes wander over all I could survey. The giant parking lot faded into the distance as we were envelope
d by the massive building. The sterile white nature of its construction did little to calm the beating of my heart. I was very nervous and was only just able to hold it in check by knowing that if I did not I would panic and ruin any possibility of escape.
“Adam is waiting outside, and he appears to be alone,” Athene said as we approached our designated parking area.
Relief washed over me and hope once more leaped to the fore. Maybe I would survive this encounter and live to help more people.
“That is good,” I said in an understated voice. “Should I take off this wire then? I do not want to have it on me unless I have to use it.”
“I would recommend leaving it on. We do not know if Ava is hiding somewhere or not. If Adam takes you away from me and guides you to her you will have need of it,” Athene said in a cautious tone.
“True, but I hope I don't need to use it,” I said as we drifted into place next to Adam's figure.
I got out of my chair and made my way back to the opening where I would meet Adam.
“Wish me and us luck Athene.” I took a deep breath and stepped toward the exit.
As the iris of the opening slid apart to reveal Adam's angry face I heard Athene whisper in my ear, “Good luck Michael.”
Before I was able to begin my descent upon the stairway that extruded from the hull, Adam leaped forward and into Athene to confront me with a raised finger, shaking it so roughly in my face I was sure he was set to attack me.
“How dare you just wander away from the scene of this accident without telling anyone what you were doing!” Adam screamed at me. His eyes were bloodshot and flecks of spittle were flying everywhere as he backed me up against a wall.
“Do you even understand how much damage this could have caused had anyone on Earth been watching the Outsider's ship? Luckily it was back-lit by the sun when this happened, otherwise everyone would have known it had taken damage. Still this means there are people down here that wish to cause harm to our cause. And here you go gallivanting around. Being focused on repairs we had thought we had lost another ship. The ones inside the ship were not so lucky. Only one other made it back from those that were there,” he said in the same shouting voice. He finally backed away slightly and turned his back on me. He used his large right hand to rub at his bald head.
“Michael, what did you see?” Adam said in defeated tones as he looked away from me.
I composed myself. I had expected an angry Adam, as that seemed to be the only emotion he was capable of, but not this frontal assault of emotions. He seemed to be losing control of his own ability to hold a conversation.
I responded in an even tone, “Not much. We had just made our way clear of the ship, and then there was a bright flash of light, and we were floating among wreckage. Athene told me we had taken some damage to our propulsion, and that we wouldn't be able to make a safe landing. I wanted us to get away from there as soon as we could as I didn't know if there would be another attack. So I had Athene try to begin repairs. I knew she had to take in energy and matter to make the repairs, so I directed her to get to the nearest mass of material we could safely get close to without crashing. I suppose at this point I fainted, as I was pretty shaken up by the explosion. When I woke up we were already on our way back here.”
As I told my tall tale of what happened, Adam had turned around and was watching my eyes. I suspect that he wanted to see if I was lying or not. I looked him right back in his eyes, not daring to look away at any point lest I reveal that not everything I said was the entire truth.
“Listen Michael,” he said as he reached out and put his hand on my shoulder, “We have a problem. We are short of ships now, and the Outsider's main vessel will be unusable due to repairs they are making. What do you think we are going to do? There is nowhere to store these bodies after we retrieve them, but if we do not go out to pick them up the public will suspect something is wrong.”
“Would it be possible to say the first day was just a test run and you need to find more pilots to replace the ones that failed their job? Or say that some quit for personal reasons. Hopefully stalling like that will give the Outsiders enough time to make more ships and repair their own,” I said, not sure why I was trying to help.
Adam took his hand off of my shoulder and looked thoughtful. He reached up to stroke his chin as if he had a beard. Turning back to look at me I could see a smile grow on his face as he said, “Yes, that might work. The Outsider's ship is damaged, but it should not take more than a day or two to make full repairs. As for making more ships, the interview process is long enough for them to construct replacements.”
Adam straightened up to his full height and smoothed out his suit. As a sly grin spread across his face he said, “I shall be busy. Wait here for further instructions.”
With that Adam turned on his heels and strode out of Athene back into the hanger. I watched him climb into one of the warehouse vehicles that were strewn about the area, and drive off into the distance. It was not until several minutes had passed that I asked Athene to close the door.
I stood there stunned at the lack of interrogation. I had expected to be wrung dry of every detail of my life, but it seemed Adam was more concerned with ships and how the public would take a perceived lack of all-powerfulness from the Outsiders.
“Michael are you alright?” Athene asked softly after I had been silent for a few minutes.
I continued to stare blankly at the wall where once the door had been. I finally was able to shake off the overwhelming sense of relief I was feeling and answered, “Yes Athene, I am fine. I'm just a little underwhelmed by their interrogation technique. Here I was expecting torture, or Ava forcing words from me, but all I got was a panicked Adam.”
“True he seemed a bit flustered. However your suggestions seemed to bring him back to himself. You may be the only thing that causes the Outsider's influence to continue unabated because of your statements here today,” Athene said coldly.
I walked over to the Victorian chair in what I called the foyer. Sitting down I thought of what I had done.
Finally finding my voice I said, “All I gave him were delaying tactics. If I had not said something, someone else would have. In so doing I pushed away more suspicion from us. Also having pilots quit as their excuse shows that working for them may not be the most pleasant thing in the world, even when they offer immortality. In the long run I think if he follows through with my suggestion it will hurt their cause.”
“Excellent Michael, how did you know what to say?” Athene asked with relief in her voice.
I laughed a little at this, “Oh Athene, I had no idea what to say. I just said something on the spur of the moment that just happened to work out for us. If anyone asks me a question about how to resolve something I will answer honestly. Truly that was the only way I could see the Outsiders avoid the public from knowing their ship had been damaged, and explain the lack of pick up service around the world. However avoiding notice still leaves them vulnerable to other problems, such as the idea that there is a lack of job satisfaction that will now be circulated to the public.” A grin had grown on my face at the thought of even more protesters, but since like me, the other pilots would be loners, there would hardly be anyone to notice their missing presence.
“I hope those other pilots didn't suffer, and that the explosion killed them quickly,” I said in a sad voice as my smile slipped from my face.
“Surely something powerful enough to destroy one of my kind would be enough to eradicate anyone unlucky enough to be inside,” Athene said gently.
“Athene do you think it is possible that Ava was destroyed as well?” I asked.
“Possible, yes. However if she was just a construct there is the possibility that another can and will be made. That being the case it does not matter if she was destroyed as another with the same hypnotizing affect will take her place,” Athene said.
“Then I suppose I should continue to worry about how to deal with her. Perhaps we shall come up
with some clever plan to foil the hypnosis, but until then I will have to count upon you and your clever mind. I am surprised though that you seem to be unaffected. Perhaps she has not focused her full attention on you, or perhaps it is a biological method that she is utilizing to cause the affect. If that is the case then perhaps we can dampen my perceptions, and that would allow me to keep my mind free from her influence,” I said, pondering aloud.
“That is possible. But for now Michael it appears as though we are grounded, in the parenting sense, and the flight sense. What shall we do to pass the time?” she said more cheerfully now.
“You know what I'm going to do. I will read something. That's my habit, and my vice. I cannot get enough of other worlds. Perhaps one day when I myself am traveling to new ones, with possible new cultures that spring up via these unfamiliar environments, I shall have no need to explore mental postulations about what man might become, and be able to simply investigate them in person. Until then, I'll be off to another world,” I said with a half smile and began walking in the direction of the library.
“Then I shall investigate what I can do to prevent another like Ava from influencing your mind. Perhaps contacts and hearing aids, along with nasal blockers, or filters, to eliminate anything she might be emitting differently than anyone else,” Athene said.
“That sounds like a plan. Now I need to relax for a bit. I seemed to have stressed myself near my limit by worrying about what I would have to deal with when we got here. Even though it wasn't anything over strenuous, I still feel worn out. It is time to recharge with a book,” I said, sounding the part of the exhausted warrior just leaving the battlefield. My battle had been one of the mind but my body was still shaking.