by Divya Singh
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“I do not want a male body” I cried out loud.
Shelly: “But it is what we have in ready to go status on our ship as of now and your brain is reaching a threshold limit.”
Shelly continued: “That is we have kept it without a body for too long. In 6 days we will run out of the limit to sustain your brain and your brain too will be lost to us forever or we choose to preserve you in Cryo again. But if we fixed your head on a plausible healthy body, you will be reanimated successfully.”
“Does that mean that I can regain my body in the future if it improves and can be fixed?”
“Yes, that is the plan. But you know chances are slim.” Von confessed.
“OK, Yes.” I had no other option than to agree to this.
I said, “so how long will it take before reanimation of another body that you have!” although, I was aggrieved but I needed to move on from the sorrow of having lost my body and perhaps mourn later.
A1: “As soon as we are ready DS. Doctors need a break to reassess the situation before we go into another trial. The body was suspended after preparing for reanimation. So the body is ready and we have only to cool it down i.e. warm up and fix your brain into it. “
Von: “we will need two hours to reassess the situation, the body’s anatomical suitability, and warming -up process.”
A1: “So when do we commence, DS?”
I instantly replied: “ASAP, you said 2 hours.”
A1: “So 2 hours from now, doctors.”
Shelly: “we will reunite in precisely two hours.”
Well, I have two hours to swing between two facets of truth. One, that I will not, at least for now have my own body. Two, I will have a foreign male body. Two, I will have a foreign male body. I was not capable of the extent of courage that I was expecting from myself at the moment. It feels like losing my identity and a source of remembrance, of who I was. That was an immeasurable amount of loss to me, but not exactly irreparable for at least now. Because what we had opined, this day will be destined to be changed tomorrow. Maybe it is the technology which will play its role in that change and if there is a probability of change, there is life.
But for certain, the time was material here. Change is a function of time. Time is what brings about a change. It awards validity to the invalid. And the best part of it, Time is always set in motion, always on the go.
I lay dead 400 years ago, but I am called alive today. The question is what is alive? The answer sprouts from the advent of time again, if I drop the definition of what ‘I am’, then I am alive. I am dead in body, but they have brought my brain to life. In that life; my previous one, the brain, and the body both together needed to be alive to constitute alive. But time has changed its very foundation.
I choose to believe in life and my brain controls that who I am today and also determines who I will be tomorrow. There must be a purpose of my this new birth. My motive is to find it and work towards attaining it with all my might. All is determined and discovered by this thing called the brain, which I experience to be developing. Memories emotions and understanding will, if not now, come back to it. So be it, my body from the previous birth or some other body I am given, I must accept this new life as a gift as it comes. I will find my purpose and pursue what I have to achieve in this birth. I need to know about this world, acclimatize to it and serve the purpose, the one that gets me going even after death, which would not allow me to Rest in Peace.
Soon enough, 2 hours had passed. I discovered myself as a being with a broader outlook and understanding and enhanced acceptability. I was ready to accept what comes ahead. I was all determined to pursue my purpose. But to have the knowledge of the same and to search for the means to achieve it, I must accept the present as a vehicle to carry me there to serve the higher purpose the way possible.
Then I heard the sound of footsteps. A1, Shelly, and Von entered the room and opened a vault which seemed frozen. They brought a cylindrical case out of it. Then A1 erected it in the front of my eyes. It was a male body. But as they said, so could I see that the reproductive organs have gone vestigial. Being a woman or man was, basically all the same now.
I was a woman in the past life; I have had my chance at it. I had lived my previous life and then I died. My body was lost to death at that time; it was not mine till now in this life. I cannot mourn the loss of something twice. In the same manner, I cannot lose something that I do not possess. So it is actually not a big deal that I do not get a rebirth in the same body. Also, this rebirth will be defined by the purpose thereof. I will accept it as it comes, and design the luxury to suit my purpose of coming back to the world of today.
As I was swirling in the thought process, A1 rolled near me. He opened the cylinder and joined the body to my head with the help of tubular structures. Then they removed the Cryo liquid, and started warming up the body by life blood transfusion.
Then electric shocks were given three times in a row, and I could feel it this time by higher intensity, each time higher than the previous, and the ECG machine starts ticking.
“We have a heartbeat!” said A1. All of them looked at me. They looked contented. So did I.”
I asked: “So I am alive now.”
Von: “Technically yes!”
Von continued after a pause: "But we still have to physically bind your head on the body.”
Then they stopped the blood flow towards the head by sponges and put my head in position to fit the body with care & precision. Then the joining points are sutured with light rays. A1 makes an incision and opens the arteries for blood supply & breathing by pulling the sponges out.
“All the vitals are functional” Explains Shelly.
A1,”Resuscitation successful, at 14:00 hours on trial 2(a) i.e. 2nd (a) - in the first attempt.”
After a few moments as I woke up I swear I could feel the weight of a body under my neck. There was a little pressure on my neck and head. I gazed below; this body was big for my mentality of the original 5’3” woman’s body. There was a heartbeat. I could feel all the limbs. But I was heavily sedated, so moving was not a possible option.
A1: “Switching off the artificial ventilator breathing system. The resultant response object is to induce natural breathing.”
When the ventilator was removed, I started to have a feeling of choking out. Seeing me cough and panic for air, Shelly shouted out loud-
SHELLY: “She cannot breathe; we must check her airway, set to tubular breathing if it does not help.”
A1 cleared my airways and I could resume inhaling oxygen this time naturally. All this procedure went so weary that I could not know when sleep seeped into my consciousness.
I woke up with ZA-vi’s perverted voice. I saw a familiar face before me, KEAH, whom he was talking to. Where was she all these days? I think I needed one more human in my difficult period.
I said: “Hey there girl! Why are you not there when I need you? I was not really upset, but still query was not unwarranted, facing the fact that what could have kept her away.
“Hello, Miss! How are you? So you have a body now! Look at you! Finally looking awesome! I was on duty plus it was not my area of expertise.” Said KEAH.
I replied: “I am still coming to terms with it, but yes since they said my reanimated head too was nearing an expiry date so I chose to accept this body. I still do hope to have my body back one day; they say they are treating it.” I said. “Wait I don’t feel good at all. I feel like throwing up!”
ZA-vi placed a can for that purpose, while KEAH rushed to help me up. I felt an acute pain when I was being helped in sitting-up this way and then I threw up a black tar-like thick liquid. I was horrified by that.
KEAH: “No worries miss! It is just a lot of chemical processes going on in your new body. It is very normal to vomit when such complex procedures are being run on one’s body.”
“No. But why do I feel pain when you stand me
up?” I asked while she helped my body lie down again.
KEAH: “It is because your brain has begun coordinating with your body. It’s like a newly transplanted organ to your brain. I will slightly raise the level of pain suppressants. It is all normal Miss.” said she, wearing a fake smile on.
I said: “When do I get to be back to being normal again? When will I be able to stand and walk on my own?” I was really concerned, so I needed to be clear about what should I expect to face.
KEAH: “It is different for everyone. But you are recovering at a remarkably fast pace. Theoretically, 3 days is an average that someone takes to be able to walk. But empirically saying, you will actually be learning to how to walk with a different body, like a child for the very first time. So your case cannot be subjected to any projections.” She replied with a sense of distaste.
I said: “Why can’t I move?” I tried lifting my right arm up, but failed again.
KEAH: “Because your brain is new to your body and coordination takes time, plus you are under the influence of pain suppressants. It is like being a little anaesthetized…..so you fail to coordinate your limbs with your brain. It may take a little while to learn the same. Your brain is just not used to this new body which you have recently acquired, but with practice, it will come to you naturally. Some parts of memories in various regions of the brain are still missing. It is like you cannot remember about yourself; past life etc. similarly it will take a little time to be able to remember how to use the functions of this body, especially when it is all new to you. But other memories are complex and the systems of the body are a type of reflex, i.e. not complex but simpler memories. So it will come back sooner to you.” she said.
SHELLY: “First we focus on the revival of the most basic and vital functions, then other life supporting functions and at the last the aesthetics of the resuscitated being. So when we are concerned with your case, it is actually
So when we are concerned with your case, it is actually the 2nd phase of reanimation process we are seeing, taken phase by phase, soon you will pass it over and drift to the aesthetic procedures and learning.” Shelly’s voice came, and along came the noise of the footsteps entering the new room I was shifted in for rest.
VON: “It is about time when she should begin the intake of liquid diet. Look at the readings! Observe the sugar count in her life blood Dr. Shelly.”
A1: “Hello madam! You appear to be in great health already!”
I said: “Except for the unbearable pain I feel everywhere, numbness and dizziness, I think I am fine.”
SHELLY: “Your vitals are working in an excellent way! Heartbeat is strong; your respiratory and circulatory systems are promising; all the systems are working in proper order. Your nutritional support system (artificial feeding) will soon be removed, but the dosage of the immunosuppressants will be raised, i.e. we are going to test your digestive system now as you will feel hungry very soon.”
I said: “I do not feel hungry, but certainly feel vomiting sensation.”
VON: “It will all pass away soon. Don’t consider it as being anything serious, it is nothing but medicines coming out.”
ZA-vi: “Here! Drink this.” ZA-vi handed me over a green juice in a large tumbler. “This will also reduce the vomiting sensation.” He said pulling out an IV (intravenous) drip on my left.
OK, I could now lift my right hand, though with a lot of difficulties and grabbed the glass, and sipped it down, ZA-vi held my wrist for support. Till then it was not so bad.
I said: “So, when will I be able to walk?”
VON: “2 may be 3 days in normal circumstances.”
I said: “I think it is all coming out again.”
It was all that I could manage to say and vomited dark colored liquid out.
I cried: “ZA-vi! Water!”
ZA-vi handed over a glass full of water to me. I guess that’s what I needed then.
A1: ”After 12 hours of proper uninterrupted rest, stand her up KEAH. Learning to balance herself is going to be the most important aspect of adjusting to the new body. We must now give her the next dose of medicines.”
ZA-vi rolled my sleeve up and gave me an injection. Doctors left my room and KEAH dimmed the lights. She just said ‘Good Night’ and left.
Chapter 4: The First Nightmare