by SK Wee
“Morning, Cal. I see you’ve found someone to keep you company. Why am I not surprised?” This deputy was older, probably over forty. Heavyset, definitely out of shape. Compared to Cal, he looked like a short round doughboy.
“Morning.” Cal sounded cool to the new arrivals. I got the feeling that he didn’t care for the doughboy. “Arnie, this is Tara. She works at the Landing and brought me coffee while I was waiting. Ted, are you going to take the dogs back or are you staying here?” The other deputy was just the opposite of fat Arnie. He was tall, probably over six and a half feet tall, and pencil thin and lanky—he looked like he was all arms and legs. He had a long, thin nose to match and thick, dark eyebrows that met easily in the middle to give the impression of one large one. When he smiled at Cal I noticed he had quite an overbite with very large front teeth—reminding me of a beaver.
“Hi there, Cal, and pleased to meet you, Tara. I’m supposed to stay here, and Arnie was told to bring the dogs back.” Arnie was still staring at me and seemed disappointed that he was the one that had to leave with the hounds.
“Unless you want to leave, Cal. I could stay and keep Tara company, and you could bring the dogs back.” Arnie’s eyes seemed glued to my chest area.
“No, Arnie. I’m staying here until the crime lab clears the area. Those were my orders.” Cal handed the car keys off to Arnie and turned to Ted. “I’m going to get some lunch at the Landing and I’ll be back as soon as I can.” Cal turned back toward the Landing and glanced over at me to see if I was coming along. With the choice of sitting here with Beaver or going back inside where it was warm, I chose to follow him.
As we made our way back to the restaurant, I remembered that I had told no one of our findings. “We need to speak with Vince and Marge. They need to know what is going on in their backyard.”
“Yes, I was planning to do that. We need to locate the next of kin. Any ideas on her family? My investigation hasn’t revealed any as yet. I’m sure she must have someone, but I don’t think she was originally from this area.”
“No, I seem to recall she came from the Duluth area. You know, I don’t remember her ever mentioning any family. That’s really strange, she must have some somewhere.”
“Well if she does, we’ll find them. Vince may have a record of an emergency contact. That’s usually listed on the employment applications.” I hadn’t thought of that but Vince would probably know more than I did. I started replaying conversations in my head but nothing came to mind.
When we entered the kitchen from the back door, I noticed that Vince was overseeing Logan in the preparations. Cal asked Vince if they could have a talk, but he also made it known that I was not invited to the interview.
“I think everything is in order, what do you think, Tara?” Logan asked as I watched Cal and Vince move toward Vince’s office. I looked around at all his preparations and they seemed in good order.
“It’s Thursday, I don’t think we need to worry too much about the prep. I’ll help you if you get behind. Alan won’t be here to tend bar until four, but we don’t usually get too many customers before then.” I went back to staring at Vince’s office door, which was shut. I was curious about what they were talking about.
“What’s with the extra deputies? Do you know?” Logan asked in a very offhand manner, but I still swung back around to look at him, once again suspicious of him.
“Well, you’re going to find out anyhow, but we found Bonnie’s body earlier in the maintenance shed. Cal is waiting for the crime lab to get here.”
“Ahh. That’s too bad, I was hoping she would be located alive and well someplace. Vince isn’t going to be happy, he thought a lot of Bonnie.”
“You seem to know an awful lot about what Vince thinks, especially since you just started here, Logan.” I looked for any sign of guilt but he just grinned back at me.
“Hmm . . . well, I listen and I learn.”
“The real question is why you’re interested enough to listen and learn?” I didn’t wait for more of his blanket responses. I knew I wouldn’t get any real reasons from him. I went out to set up tables for lunch. I wasn’t expecting very many, but who knows. I didn’t have any appointments at the beauty shop until the following day, but now I would probably have to cancel them as well because I would have to take over Bonnie’s hours.
Chapter Seven
Fee
The days seemed to blend in together as I tried to figure out what the rest of my life would be like. At only twenty-eight, I assumed I had a long road ahead of me. If this was all that life now offered me, it would be very long indeed. I spent every morning at the hardware store keeping up with the accounting. Lenore was still working also, so we were usually done within a couple of hours. After we finished, I would go out front and make sure the sales clerks were given breaks. During the week there was only one clerk, but on the weekends, we had at least two available.
Over a week had passed since the revelation of Rich’s infidelity, and I could already tell he wasn’t taking the separate bedrooms well. He tried several times to cajole me into having sex with him. I did feel pity for him, just not enough to let him back into my bed. I realized, almost immediately, that I would probably never want him back there. I finally sat down with him to discuss the issue.
“Fee, I’m a man and I have needs.” This was the same argument he posed almost daily.
“Rich, I’m sorry but that isn’t going to happen anytime soon, if at all. It’s not just your affair, which I still haven’t forgiven you for. With the hole in my life that Lizzie’s passing left and the fact that our sex life was never all that pleasant to begin with, I just don’t want to get back into that rut. I guess we should seriously consider separating.”
“No, Fee. We can’t separate, I won’t allow it. There has to be a different way. I’ll continue using the guest room for now.” He sighed but seemed resigned.
“I’ve made an appointment with Pastor Dale for some counseling, but I don’t expect miracles. I’ve set it up for tomorrow afternoon.”
“Oh, Fee. I wish you wouldn’t air our dirty laundry to everyone. I don’t know why you can’t just get over things the way other women do.”
“I’m going to the Pastor, not the whole world, Rich. I need some guidance or direction. I feel like I’m just drifting in the wind.” Though Rich wasn’t at all happy that I was meeting with the Pastor, I made sure he knew that it was what I needed to heal.
Once Lenore and I finished up with the accounting entries, she went for coffee and I gave Ted, the sales clerk, a break. It was a warm, sunny Tuesday morning and he was going to go for a short walk. Though it was still February, the weather was quite warm. They had predicted a high of over fifty degrees.
After Ted left, I waited on an older couple and then noticed Rich talking to my married dream man. He was even hotter than the last time I saw him. He had on his old, worn-out jeans and a sweatshirt with the sleeves shoved up. I could tell he had an interesting tattoo on his right arm and wondered what it was. Once again, I could feel my heart pound in my chest as I stared at him. It seemed the only time my heartbeat was felt at all was when this man was in the vicinity. I wondered what would happen to it if he actually touched me. I believed my heart probably would just explode. Rich walked with him up to the register where I stood. I tried to get myself back under control. For goodness sake, the man was married and I didn’t even know him!
“Fee, this is Logan Tate. He isn’t real sure about the size of coupler he needed so I’m letting him take a few sizes home to try out. He’ll bring the others back later.”
“Hi there, Fee, is it? You’re the one I tried to take down with the pipe last week, aren’t you? Again, I’m sorry.” He held his hand out to shake and I immediately grabbed onto it. I needed to see what kind of sparks would fly with a touch. Heat. Heat is what I felt. Heat from head to toe. I hadn’t felt that alive since Lizzie left.
“Well, nice to meet you, Logan. Why don’t we wait until you com
e back and figure out what you owe then? That would be easier than charging for all of them and then having to give you a refund.”
“Whatever works for you, Fee.” The way he said my name sent shivers down my spine. And his smile, it was like the devil made a pact with Heaven to prove he could instill lust in every human being. It wasn’t even a full smile, just one-sided; oh, but the eyes were filled with promises. At least that’s what it felt like, promises of things to come, things destined to be.
By the time he left the store, my legs were actually trembling. How could just a look and touch affect someone so completely? Yet another reason I wouldn’t want to have Rich back in my bed. How could he possibly measure up to this fantasy?
Shortly after lunch, I went over to the church to meet with Pastor Dale. I didn’t have any sort of expectations. I knew that my grief would take years to fade, but fade it would, eventually. I didn’t know why I even considered the counseling except that my mother recommended I go. She too had lost a child in infancy and knew how hard it was to carry on. The biggest difference was that she still had a house full of other children that needed her, while I had nothing, nothing at all.
When I drove by the beauty shop, I noticed Tara coming out and stopped to talk to her. My standing appointment with her was the following day, but I wanted to see how she was doing.
“Hi, Fee. How are things going with you?” We discussed the weather and the slow business of both the store and the resort that she worked at. I asked her if she heard from her friend Bonnie. “Oh, Fee, haven’t you heard? Cal found Bonnie’s body last week outside the restaurant in a maintenance shed. The state crime lab was there for several hours and they took her body to examine.”
“Oh, Tara, I’m sorry to hear that. I know she was a friend of yours. No, I hadn’t heard at all. I wonder if Rich knows.” I thought that if he did, he would have mentioned it but who knows what goes on in his mind. By the time I reached the church, my mind was abuzz with all sorts of questions. I could tell that Tara was deeply curious also. We planned to have lunch again after my appointment so we could talk.
Pastor Dale had been with our church for as long as I can remember. He was often a guest at our home when I was growing up. My parents always invited him to all our family events, thus he always felt more like an uncle than a religious leader to me. I was somewhat uncomfortable talking about what I found out about Rich and Bonnie, but he seemed to understand what I was going through. He gave me several pamphlets on the grieving process and a list of scripture passages to read.
By the time I left him, I did feel a little better, though I still didn’t have any sort of answers as to where my life was headed. He asked so many questions about Rich and his liaison with Bonnie that I began to wonder if his alibi could hold up. I remembered he was with my family and me that evening, but I had gone to bed fairly early having received some medication from the doctor to help me sleep. Rich could have easily left the house after that and I would never have known about it. I quickly dismissed those ideas when I considered Rich and everything I knew about him. There wasn’t any possibility that he could be involved in Bonnie’s death.
Even though I wasn’t expected to go back to the store, I decided to take a chance on being there for Logan’s return. I know it seems foolish, but the man made me feel alive and I craved that feeling like no other. Lizzie’s death caused my heart to become little more than a block of ice, and one look from Logan took some of the chill away. I knew there was no future there for me, but I really wasn’t interested in a future, just a moment here and there. A moment of warmth and then I could once again brave the cold chill of my life.
When I entered the store, I asked Ted if someone had returned with the couplings and he informed me that yes, Mr. Tate had found one that fit and returned the others just a few minutes earlier.
“Well, I’m happy he found what he needed, Ted. Is Rich back in his office?” I asked. I wanted to inform Rich about Bonnie’s body being found before he heard it elsewhere.
“Yes, but he didn’t want to be disturbed,” Ted replied as he went back to organizing some of the shelves.
“I’m sure he won’t mind my stopping in.” I went to the back of the store where his office was. He usually kept the door open so he could hear everything that was going on but the door was shut. Just before I knocked, I heard him inside talking to someone. He began moaning, and I immediately thought he was in some sort of pain so I entered the room without knocking. The scene in front of me took a few seconds to register in my mind. There sat Rich at his desk with one of the young part-time clerks, Mandy, giving him oral sex. My first thought was that I knew this girl’s parents and she was barely out of high school.
Rich jumped up out of his chair, causing Mandy to fall backward onto the floor. “For heaven’s sake, Fee! You could have knocked!” Mandy stood up trying to fasten the buttons of her blouse while Rich adjusted his trousers.
“I didn’t know it was a requirement. Oh, Rich, how dare you? I can hardly believe my eyes and with a young employee!” I turned and hurried out of the building and back to my car. I felt like driving forever or at least as far as the car would take me. How could my life have become so pathetic?
After driving around aimlessly for what seemed like hours, I drove home. I made a couple of decisions, the first was to pack up some clothes and go to my parents’ home for a few days. At least until I figured out what else to do. I now knew that I could no longer remain in this farce of a marriage. I needed to find a lawyer and begin divorce proceedings as soon as possible. Rich would certainly try to stop me, and suddenly the thought of Bonnie’s murder came to mind. Realizing that I didn’t know Rich nearly as well as I had thought now had me questioning the very real thought that he may have committed the crime. Another thought came right on the heels of that one. If he could kill once, he could certainly try again.
These thoughts were going through my mind as I quickly got some clothes together. When I heard the garage door open, my heart nearly froze with fear. Maybe Rich had a gun in the house somewhere. How could I defend myself?
“Fee? Fee, where are you?” Rich yelled up the stairs.
Swallowing my fear, I tried to think more rationally. “Don’t bother trying to stop me, Rich. I’m going to stay with my parents for a while.” I took a deep breath and started down the staircase, suitcase in hand.
“Let’s talk about this before you go storming off. You’re the one who kicked me out of my bed. What was I suppose to do?”
“I don’t know what you were supposed to do. What I do know, is that you should never, never involve your employees. You know as well as I do that it is sexual harassment. She could easily file a lawsuit against you. For goodness sake, Rich, we know her parents. How would you explain this to them?”
“She was more than willing—unlike you. Now come on, you can’t leave like this. I won’t let you.” Rich sounded very determined, and my fear started to creep back in.
“I’ve already called my mother and she is waiting for me. I need a few days to process all this. Please, just let me pass.” None of that was true, but I hoped he wouldn’t become combative if he knew someone was waiting for me.
Maybe he saw the fear in my eyes but he stepped aside. “I’m not going to hurt you, Fee. I don’t want you to leave but I won’t stop you.”
“Thank you, and I’ll be in touch.” He let me walk out the door and followed me out to the garage.
“I’ll call you tomorrow, Fee. Maybe we can have a rational conversation.” He stepped aside when I started the car and backed out of the garage. By then, my fear had dissipated.
When I arrived at my parents’ farm, I had to come up with something to explain why I was there. I didn’t want to relate all the sordid facts and especially to my folks. When they asked, I replied, “Things haven’t been the same since Lizzie left, and one thing led to another and we are not getting along at all.” My mother hugged me with compassion and my father gave me a disapproving
look, but neither asked anymore questions which I was thankful for.
“Take your suitcase up to my sewing room, sweetie. You can use the daybed in there for as long as you wish.” Mom was busy with dinner preparation but I gave her another hug.
“I’ll be right back down to help you with dinner, Mom.” I knew my younger sisters would be getting off the bus soon and my younger brother was out in the barn doing chores. Sam was nineteen and graduated high school but didn’t plan to go to college. He wanted to be a farmer like Dad, and nothing more.
Mom’s sewing room was actually my old bedroom, re-purposed since it was no longer needed for anything else. The window overlooked the front of the house, and I watched as the school bus stopped and dropped off Joan and Emily. Joan was a senior in high school and though she had a driver’s license, she still rode the bus. Emily was the youngest of the family at fifteen and from what I heard, already had several boys calling her nearly every evening. Emily was a lovely child with a fresh and bubbly personality. I was sure that she would break a few hearts.
While I was still moving things around in the room, Joan burst through the door. “Mom just told me that you were going to stay with us for a little while. It’ll be fun to have you here with us, Fee.” Joan gave me a quick hug and plopped down on the bed.
“We’ll see how things go. I hope I won’t be too much of a bother. How are you doing, little sis? How’s school going?”
“Well, I just accepted Joel Martin’s invitation to the Spring Prom. I was hoping someone else would ask, but I didn’t want to turn one down and not get any other. The dance isn’t for over a month, but what if no one else asked?”
“I’m sure if you get a better offer, you can talk to Joel about it.” I knew that Joan had always looked up to Rich with something like hero worship. She would probably take his side if it came to taking sides.
“So who’s taking care of Rich? Does he have someone to cook dinner for him?” Oh boy, here it comes already.