I, Psychopath

by Ph. D. Stephen M. Kahn

  Bart wanted to phone a few friends who might know where Cal was but it didn’t seem smart to include other people in our plans since they might become witnesses against us. I didn’t know these guys and couldn’t trust strangers to stand by us if police questioned them about Cal’s fate. I didn’t know how but we would have to find Cal ourselves by listening to what others knew about his location and then devising a plan for retribution. Bart didn’t want to wait and was all for driving through the area in the hope of spotting him and being unable to convince him otherwise, I got in the car and let him have his way. We wasted two hours motoring up and down streets without having a clue of where Cal was. I was really getting sick of this idea but Bart seemed on a mission and couldn’t be persuaded to stop. After another fifteen minutes, I told him to take me home and continue on if that’s what pleased him. He was really irked and accused me of blocking his chance of revenge but after ranting for a few minutes, headed toward my apartment and let me off. My parting words were “if you locate him, don’t do anything until I’m notified and able to plan something”. I didn’t know if he would listen to me but there was a choice on the table. For the next few hours, I sat on the couch and tried to unravel all of the events that had happened today. Some were good but most were not and it was going to take some deep thought to come out of this mess and end up in a better place.

  I welcomed sleep as a way to escape thinking about all these problems and felt a little better in the morning. After work, I would rush to my new apartment and wait for the delivery truck to unload my rentals. It was very exciting to think about having my own place and that thought running through my mind made the day move by very slowly. I didn’t ask April to join me at the new place as a way to avoid encouraging her to persist in the belief that we would live together. Instead, I would take a bus that let me off three blocks from the unit and would use it as my main means of transportation to and from work. Still on my mind was Bart’s attitude and whether he would want to take part in future jobs. I phoned him from work but no one answered. Persistence would have to be my keyword since at this juncture, it would take a long time to find another partner in crime. There was no way I could do a robbery alone since people might fight back against one assailant and a car was essential for a fast getaway. There were still problems on my mind as the bakery shift ended. I hurried to the bus stop and welcomed the relief, even if temporary, from other ruminations. The bus ride only took fifteen minutes during the rush hour and made me think that my choice of location had been perfect. I rushed over to the apartment and went inside my place just to get the feel of being in it. Too bad I had no food to cook but restaurants were not far and as soon as the furniture deliveries were made, a good meal would be eaten. About twenty minutes later, a large van pulled up and two men came to the door to make sure they had the right unit. Moving everything in didn’t take long and I had them put everything where the pieces seemed to fit best. When everything was in and the men had left, I took a good look around and was surprised at how much smaller the spaces were but they were all mine. I sat on the couch for a few minutes, turned on the television, and felt right at home. The bed felt comfortable and everything I needed for it had been included so it would be a good nights’ sleep for me when the time came.

  I didn’t have a phone yet and decided that instead of an apartment phone, a cell phone would serve my purpose best since it could be bought and activated almost immediately. A decent looking restaurant was located near the building where I could eat supper and it gave me a chance to call Bart again because it seemed more and more imperative that he continue working with me. Bart answered on the second ring and to my surprise; he was very calm and somewhat apologetic for his behavior last night. I told him about the apartment and he wanted to come right over and see it while also discussing our next venture. Well, I thought, things were finally falling in place and looking good except with the problem involving April. I had enough on my plate for right now so what to do about her was put off for a time while more immediate concerns were dealt with. On the way back to the apartment, I stopped at a small grocery and bought a few items that would be needed until a major trip to a large supermarket could be accomplished. An hour later, Bart arrived and after looking around and remarking about how great the place was, our conversation took a serious turn toward making money. Without the girls to accompany us, it would be very risky to look for victims without someone noticing us but I thought that if we were not seen as being together, then it would be easier to escape detection in a crowded establishment. We had to pick a tavern in a different part of town in case our previous locations were being watched by police. The bar also had to be in a well to do area that attracted single people with money to spend who liked their liquor. We only wanted to attack men who were without companions for many obvious reasons and since that plan had always been successful, there was no reason to change it.

  We decided to scout a few taverns in nice areas on the weekend and see what looked best for our purposes. That gave me a few days to settle in to the apartment and rearrange the furniture to my liking. I also needed to figure out how to deal with April so she didn’t break up our relationship. That was going to be a lot more difficult since in her mind, she had already decided that we were going to live together as a married couple. The more I thought about the situation, the more my mind seemed to turn against her moving in. It just didn’t seem right that at my young age, I should be tied down to one woman when there were so many others available for the taking. I would try to reason with her about not moving in so soon but if she gave me an ultimatum, then it would be all over for us. No girl was going to tell me what to do and if it meant dropping one after another to have my way, then that is how is was going to be. Why these women want to settle down with a guy so soon was beyond me when it seemed absolutely stupid. They were young also and should want to go out with many guys. Well, my mind seemed made up on this matter and all that remained was to see how it played out. I would call April later and disclose my decision without listening to any pleas or logic from her. If I gave her an inch, she would end up taking more and more until I had nothing left. I didn’t care if she cried because my mind was now hardened to the possibility of no longer seeing her and nothing was going to change my attitude.

  That evening I phone her and asked if she wanted to come over and talk but her immediate response was “when can I move in with you?” The conversation had already started off badly and there was no backing down now. I spoke to her as pleasantly as possible about not being ready for a live in situation and thought that my words were very sensible but she didn’t. April’s voice started rising in loudness and soon reached a crescendo that was hurting my ears. She threw every possible reason at me and when I didn’t budge, began to call me names that I never thought a lady would know. After listening to her diatribe for ten minutes, I said that this discussion was going nowhere and if she didn’t tone down her voice, there was no use going on. Those words really got her going and the screaming became louder until I just hung up. It took me a few minutes to calm my rising temper down although I was glad that it had not exploded at her. That situation had been handled rather well and if she wanted to apologize and remain close without living together, then that’s how it would be. Otherwise, the hell with her and I’ll start looking for someone else at the first opportunity. Who knows, there might even be some good looking chicks at the apartment complex. At this time, I had not met any of the neighbors and they were probably curious about me also.

  I was proud of having dumped two women who tried to control my life and felt a great sense of confidence in my ability to handle the opposite sex. Many of the older guys at the camp had told me about the ways of females and how best to deal with them. Now, their words were making sense and being put to good use. With the matter of April out of the way, it was now time to explore my surroundings and see what new experiences lay in front of me. Soon, I would be approaching the age of twenty one and become off
icially legal. Being underage never bothered me because of looking older and no one ever asked for identification when going into drinking establishments. I probably looked about twenty four and thought that having a decent looking face would always work to my advantage. It was still light outside so I walked around the apartment complex to get some idea of what it looked like and who might be living there. I didn’t see any residents but noticed that a couple of the apartments had children’s items in front of their doors. I was fantasizing that some knockout chick lived in one of the units and was not attached at the moment. The walk was interesting but no people were in the vicinity so I went back to my place and watched television. I wouldn’t be seeing Bart until the weekend so this was really a good period of time to relax and take stock of where my life was heading. I probably didn’t have a girlfriend right now and cash was getting low since expenses were taking up most of my meager salary. Even with the raise promised to me at the bakery, I would still be earning peanuts. My highest priority right now was filling up my coffers with a good haul from our next job and it had to happen soon. I hadn’t even gone to the grocery yet and bought all the foods that make up good meals. My experience with food prices was extremely limited but I’m sure it would cost a good part of my salary. When I added utilities, the cell phone and all the other necessities, the amount would be higher than what I took home. Life was not easy for a single guy without savings or family help whose job barely paid more than minimum wage.

  The next few days were fairly uneventful except for buying a cell phone, having it activated and stocking up on some of the groceries needed. April had not phoned my mother’s place and damn if I was going to call her. If all she needed me for was an apartment to move into and wouldn’t listen to my logical excuses, then good riddance although I did miss the sex. The Friday work day was finally over and provided a break from the monotony that engulfed my life. In a short while, Bart was going to meet with me to begin our latest project. I hadn’t heard from him in a few days and hoped he had gotten over his obsession with Cal, although he did deserve a good beating from us. Running into him now would only take our minds off the more important issues and beating his body to a pulp would not solve our needs. Bart came over about eight thirty and we briefly discussed our plan for the night. He would park the car a few blocks away from the bar and we would walk separately to the room and sit far apart. Our main task was to locate potential targets with many large green bills in front of them who were drinking steadily. Of course they had to be unaccompanied when leaving. We had decided to try a new tavern in a better part of town and parked the car about three blocks from the building before walking in a few minutes apart. When I entered, the layout of the place impressed me with its newness and spaciousness. A large crowd had already showed up and people were dancing and conversing like they were at some giant party. I noticed several nice looking girls, unescorted and seated at tables, but business came first on this night.

  The lights were dim but I could make out Bart standing by the far end of the bar and found a stool at the opposite end. We were able to observe all customers between us and noticed a few that looked promising. When not staring at the marks, I let my gaze wander to the dance floor where the gyrating couples were pretending to be dancing. I would have liked to ask a few girls to dance but it would have taken my concentration away or at least diffused it. I had to keep reminding myself why we were here and that acquiring money was far more important than meeting a few hot chicks. After all, I could always come back here on a night when my attention was strictly focused on pleasure. We stayed at the tavern for two hours and kept our eyes on who would be the most likely marks for a future robbery. Nothing would be done tonight so that we could compare our observations and decide on the best victim. We left the place separately, met at the car, and immediately drove to the second establishment where our routine would be repeated. When I entered the next bar, it was apparent that the décor and clientele were upscale. The drinks were also higher priced than the last place and I was sure that a big score would be made from any job that was undertaken. We performed our similar watching of customers and returned to the car about seventy minutes later. It hadn’t taken long to realize that people at this establishment were wealthy and carried a lot of cash. We compared notes and decided on three people who were possibilities for our line of work. It looked like tomorrow night would be a lucrative experience and since we had selected several guys, it wouldn’t matter which of them showed up. I felt lots of excitement throughout my body on that night even as sleep began to win out over my restlessness. I was going to make a lot of money tomorrow night and more importantly, get back into action.

  Living alone has its advantages especially when I was able to do anything without explaining or answering to another. I felt more confident that the right decision had been made with April and knew that had she lived with me, her ways would have eventually prevailed. I had some cereal for breakfast and went outside to meet any neighbors who might happen to appear. A few people were standing near doors but they were either too old or uninteresting looking for me to start a conversation. I was thinking that the chance of meeting a woman at this complex was diminishing when out of one of the units walked a nice looking blond holding a baby. A woman with a baby was not something that I had in mind for a girlfriend but she was very pretty and who knows, maybe the kid isn’t hers. I slowly walked over and smiled at her which brought a return expression that brightened the entire area. I mentioned having just moved in and curious to see who the neighbors were when another older woman came out and took the baby from her. She turned out to be the mother of the child who was visiting her younger sister. That was a great relief to me and I introduced myself to both who gave me their names. Lana was the older sister while Francine was the single girl who lived at the unit. We chatted for a few minutes until the girls mentioned that they were leaving to go on a shopping spree. Before heading out, Francine said she hoped to see me again soon. I nodded in assent and went back to my apartment with a good feeling about this meeting although having someone live that close might be a problem in the future.

  CHAPTER ELEVEN

  Well, things had certainly picked up in the social life sector and I thought it boded well for the upcoming night. It would not be a good idea to see Francine today because of other more important tasks before me but tomorrow might be a good day to take her out to lunch and really get acquainted. I hadn’t had sex in a week and that fact was starting to infiltrate my thoughts more and more. After all, I was a young stud and needed the company of women fairly often. I spent the rest of the day shopping for groceries and familiarizing myself with the area. There were several strip malls nearby and wandering through them had to suffice since I didn’t have any spare cash to make purchases. My money was getting low and if I was going to start up with a new woman, then it meant more expenses for eating out and entertainment. I couldn’t let the girls think that money was an object because in my mind, it was always important to look like a big man who knew his way around. The hours passed and soon darkness fell and I started preparing myself mentally for the nights’ work. Bart was going to arrive about eight thirty and we would go over any last minute details on how to make everything as easy as possible. We were both going to dress up a little and give the appearance of fitting in with the well heeled customers What had to be avoided at all costs was any reason for one of us to be noticed because we didn’t look like the rest of the clientele. I made a light supper and tried to relax for awhile until Bart arrived because when he did, the electricity was going to start zapping my body with a powerful motion that would pump me up real good.

  Bart arrived a little early and I could tell that he was hyped up for our work and probably really needed the money by now. For some reason, he had never learned to pace his spending and threw money away in splurges that were pretty wasteful. I always made sure that no money was lent to him because the chance of his paying it back was next to zero and while helping
a friend in need might be required at times, with him, it was a losing proposition. When he came in the apartment, his looks and mannerisms suggested that he had used some kind of substance and I hoped it wouldn’t interfere with our routine. He was talking real fast and I tried to calm him down by going over our plans again but it didn’t seem to work. Well, I had to believe that he knew what to do and would take the proper action when it was called for. After all, he was as experienced in these matters as I was. We sat for a few minutes to kill some time and then left for the first club. It was about eleven miles from my place and with traffic, took twenty five minutes to reach. It was now after nine and time to make our move. After parking the car about two blocks away in a fairly dark area, Bart walked to the bar and entered. I waited ten minutes and made my entrance along with a bunch of noisy revelers who made it look like we were all together. I separated from them and took a stool at one end of the bar where Bart could be seen along with many customers who were already well in to their imbibing. While sipping a beer, I concentrated on the single males drinking alone who were flashing a sizable stack of bills from their wallets as they paid the bartender. Of course, I couldn’t tell if they were ones or fifties but some of the stacks looked impressive. It would take a while to really tell who was drinking the most and throwing cash around but between Bart and me, we could come up with a pretty good idea of who to target.