by Ruff, K. S.
Kadyn leaned his head toward mine. “Let’s call it a night,” he whispered conspiratorially.
His tone sent me into a tailspin. Suddenly, I wanted nothing more than to be alone with him. I glanced toward the crowded living room, then slowly nodded. My pulse quickened as I reached for his hand.
Kadyn led me to the front door where we collected our coats. His thumb drew tiny circles along the inside of my wrist while we waited for the valet. Neither of us said a word as Kadyn helped me step into the car.
A pleasant sort of tension spun between us during the drive home. Kadyn parked in his usual spot and walked me back to my apartment. He unlocked my door, then helped me slip out of my coat. “Do you mind if I put some music on?” he asked as he gently caressed my arms.
I slipped my shoes off. “No, that sounds good.” My heart was pounding. I could feel something shifting between us. The gentle ribbing that typically formed our banter was gone, replaced by something that demanded far more than words.
Kadyn played with the iPod on my breakfast bar while I hung our coats up. After a great deal of consideration, he settled on a song. He returned the iPod to the speaker where I kept it docked. Then he turned and held out his hand. “May I have this dance?”
I placed my hand in his. He pulled me close, then gently began to sway. I closed my eyes and smiled as I relaxed into his chest. “‘Dream a Little Dream of Me.’ Good choice.”
Kadyn softly sang the lyrics while we danced. He stilled when the iPod rolled into the next song. His eyes searched mine as he lifted my chin. “I wish….”
“Wish what?” I whispered as I pulled back to look at him.
His eyes fell to my lips. “I wish I could tell you how I feel about you, but I can’t.”
“You can’t?” I whispered hoarsely.
Kadyn’s eyes closed as he gently shook his head. “No.”
“Why?” I inquired, mustering just enough courage to ask.
Kadyn’s eyes were full of sadness when he finally looked at me. “Because if you heard those three words now, you’d run.”
My heart stalled. “I…”
Kadyn quickly placed his finger on my lips. “The wrong men have spoken those words to you and proven them a lie.”
Tears welled in my eyes.
Slowly his finger left my lips and trailed down my chin… my neck… and across my collarbone. Both of his hands cupped my shoulders, then slid down my arms until his fingers linked with mine. Softly, he whispered, “Please let me show you, instead.”
My heart beat skittishly as a single tear slid down my cheek. I took a deep breath and slowly nodded.
He brushed the tear away with his thumb, then held my face in his hands as his lips met mine. I melted into his chest as his hands ran down my neck… across my collarbone… and settled on my shoulders once more. He eased first one then the other strap off my shoulders. The dress whispered silkily as it slid to the ground and pooled at my feet. Kadyn scooped me up into his arms and carried me to the bedroom as he resumed the kiss.
Kadyn lowered me to the bed. He sat next to me on the edge of the bed and gently caressed my face. “You’re not afraid?”
“Terrified,” I confessed as a chill tickled my spine.
Kadyn held my gaze as he loosened his tie. He slowly unbuttoned his shirt. “You must know the power you have over me…”
My eyebrows knit with confusion.
Kadyn ran his fingers across my forehead to smooth it back out. “I would walk through fire for you, Kri. I would gladly lay my life down for yours.”
My eyes softened as I reached for his face.
He quickly captured my hand. His eyes remained fixed on mine as he kissed the palm of my hand. “What do you want, Kri?”
“You,” I breathed. “I want you.”
Kadyn released my hand as he stood. His shirt and pants fell to the floor. He nudged the clothes aside with his foot. Then he walked to the end of the bed. His hands caressed my legs as he removed the silk stockings I’d been wearing under my dress. He reached for my foot and gently began massaging the arch. “I want all of you, Kri. I’ve never wanted anything more.”
My entire body clenched as he gently scraped his teeth along the arch of my foot. He retraced the path with his tongue. “I want you to feel what I feel every time I look at you,” he whispered huskily. He planted wet, erotic kisses all the way up my leg. He paused as he reached my hips. Then he hooked his fingers in my thong.
“Kadyn,” I gasped as he slid the thin silver lace down my legs. My heart stumbled against my chest as he stepped out of his boxer briefs. I couldn’t take my eyes off his beautifully sculpted body.
Kadyn reached for my other foot. “You have all of the control here, Kri. I’ll stop the second you say the word.”
I couldn’t have said stop if I wanted to. My brain stalled the second Kadyn’s mouth found my toes. I tried not to whimper as he consumed each toe and the arch of my foot in a provocative kiss.
His lips forged a trail up my other leg. Heat pooled low and deep when he reached the top of my leg. He trailed fiery kisses over my hip, then licked and nipped his way up my abdomen. He bracketed me in his arms and legs as he teased each breast into a hard peak with his tongue.
My hands fisted in the comforter as I resisted the urge to pull his mouth closer to my breasts. I bit my lip in an effort to maintain some level of self-control.
Kadyn kissed my neck and lowered his body to mine.
The feel of his bare skin sliding against mine chased all coherent thoughts from my mind. I locked my arms and legs around him, suddenly desperate to feel more. “Kadyn,” I pleaded. I wanted to feel him inside of me… needed him inside of me… but I couldn’t speak those words.
His hands tangled in my hair as his lips sought mine. His tongue swept through my mouth, demanding me to let go… to stop thinking… to feel more.
I arched against him as our bodies aligned. He pressed into me, then somehow resisted what both of our bodies were begging for. He broke the kiss as he turned me in his arms, and suddenly my stomach was pressed against the bed. Kadyn kissed all across the nape of my neck… across my shoulders… up and down my arms… then down my back. “You’re so beautiful,” he whispered. “How can anyone be this beautiful?”
I tried to speak as Kadyn rolled me back over, but he robbed me of all breath as his tongue stroked slowly between my legs. I was still struggling to breathe as his tongue pressed lower and more deeply than it had before. “Please, Kadyn...”
He paused uncertainly. “Do you want me to stop?”
I wasn’t sure whether to laugh or cry, so I did both. “God, no, Kadyn. I want you inside of me. Now.”
Kadyn smiled as he continued seducing me with his tongue. It wasn’t until I was shaking and on the edge of tears that he slowly made his way back up my body. He linked his hands in mine, then forced them into the pillow behind my head. His eyes held mine as he slowly pushed inside of me.
My breath caught when the pressure blurred the lines between pleasure and pain. Kadyn paused as I breathed through the pain. I closed my eyes and arched against him, encouraging him to press a little deeper. He continued to ease into me, inch by inch, until he filled me completely. I stilled as I savored the feel of his body so deeply buried in mine. I suddenly realized how much I wanted and needed this connection with Kadyn.
Slowly, he began to move. “Open your eyes, Kri. Look at me.”
His eyes softened when I looked into his eyes. His hands clenched mine as he captured my lips. His tongue led mine in the same seductive dance as the rest of our bodies, slowly stoking my need.
I wrapped my legs around Kadyn’s as I tried to anchor myself. He moaned as I arched against him, my body silently pleading for more. He pulled back, then drove into me hard and deep. He stilled, then slowly pulled back again. I gasped as Kadyn thrust even harder. Still, I wanted more. I untangled my hands from his and reached for his back, pulling him against me as he drove into me once more.
My head fell back as Kadyn took control of my hips. Pleasure spiraled deep and low as he moved inside of me. Then, without any warning, he lifted my hips and slammed deep inside. Stars pricked at the back of my eyes as my body exploded from the inside out. Kadyn held me as I rode out the waves. Then he gently eased my hips up and drove into me once more. Kadyn stilled. I gasped as he filled me with a searing heat. My body clenched, then shattered all over again.
I collapsed against his chest, completely stunned. I was struggling not to cry as I clung to him. A million different feelings were coursing through me… relief… happiness… belonging… contentment… and love. But the fear was gone.
“Hey, you okay?” he whispered.
I listened to his heartbeat while I tried to regain my composure. “Yes,” I finally breathed.
He grew quiet as his fingers ran softly up and down my spine.
“So that’s what it feels like,” I mused.
“What?” Kadyn asked. He began sifting his fingers through my hair. He gently tugged my hair from the upsweep until it fell over my shoulders and back.
“An orgasm,” I responded. I giggled nervously.
Kadyn rolled us over again. He tucked me beneath his body while still buried deep inside. His eyes met mine. “You’ve never had one before?”
I shook my head.
Slowly, he smiled. “Would you like another one?”
It was my turn to smile. “I’d like at least a hundred more.”
A single eyebrow rose on Kadyn’s face. “That’s a tall order for one night.”
I laughed softly. “I don’t have to be anywhere tomorrow.”
Kadyn chuckled as he pinned my hands back over my head. “We'd better get started then.”
* * * * * *
Kadyn and I managed to track down a real Christmas tree, and it was blinking, in all of its holiday glory, in front of my sliding glass doors. We had both decided to stay in DC for the holidays so we invited Cenia and Roger to join us for dinner Christmas Eve.
Kadyn set my iPod to cycle through all of my favorite Christmas songs. My apartment didn’t have a fireplace, so I lit a massive amount of candles and positioned them all over the house. Between the candles and the lights from the tree, the place was bathed in soft, twinkling lights.
Kadyn and Roger grilled steaks on my patio while I baked Alaskan king crab legs. Cenia tossed a salad, then pulled twice baked potatoes from the oven. We loaded up our plates in the kitchen, then settled in at my coffee table, since it was the closest thing I had to a dining room table. After dinner, Cenia and I sipped on cranberry margaritas as the four of us shared our most cherished Christmas memories.
Cenia and Roger left shortly after midnight. Kadyn and I wandered through the living room, blowing out candles. He blew the flame from the last candle, then gathered me into his arms. “Merry Christmas, pretty lady.”
I rolled up to my toes and planted a soft kiss on his lips. “Merry Christmas.”
“Would you like your Christmas present now?” he murmured, kissing me behind the ear.
“Uh… yes.” The kiss was diverting, but he was crazy if he thought I was going to pass by an opportunity to get my present early.
Kadyn lavished even more attention on my neck.
“Okay, maybe I can wait,” I conceded with a laugh.
Kadyn chuckled softly as he broke away. He slid his hand into his pocket and pulled out a thin gold bracelet that was laced with an intricate pattern of sparkling diamonds.
My jaw fell open. I hadn’t been expecting such an extravagant gift. The bracelet was exquisite.
Kadyn clasped the bracelet around my wrist, then gently kissed my hand.
I gathered his face in my hands and kissed him thoroughly. “Thank you,” I whispered breathlessly. I led him to the Christmas tree and pulled a small box from underneath. I handed him the gift as we settled on the couch. “I hope you like it.”
Kadyn unwrapped the box. His eyes lit up with surprise. “Tickets to the Bears and Ravens game? The Bears are my favorite team.”
I rolled my eyes. “I noticed.” It had been impossible not to, given that half of his wardrobe had the team’s name imprinted on it.
He smiled as he set the box on the coffee table. “It’s perfect.”
“You’re perfect,” I responded as I snuggled into his arms. I tucked my head under his chin and sighed contentedly as we settled in to watch the lights twinkling on the tree. The lights continued to dance across our bodies long after we fell asleep.
* * * * * *
Kadyn navigated me through the crowd that was gathering in the main foyer of the Kennedy Center. I couldn’t help but admire how nicely his tux showed off his broad shoulders and narrow waist as I trailed behind him. I was wearing a silver sequined gown that captured the colorful lights flickering from the bands stationed at both ends of the foyer. We had just finished watching Freddy Cole and Dizzy Gillespie perform in the Terrace Theater. Kadyn was forging his way through the crowd trying to find Cenia, Roger, Mason, Gabi, Phil, and Marie so we could all be together as the clock struck twelve. Finally, I caught a glimpse of Cenia’s red evening gown.
“There! They're over there!” I shouted over the noise of the crowd and the bands.
Kadyn quickly switched directions. He pulled me in front of him as we approached our friends.
Marie handed me a flute of champagne. “I was worried you wouldn’t make it down here in time!”
“This crowd is insane!” Cenia exclaimed as she handed Kadyn a Sprite.
“It’s awesome,” I insisted with a smile. I had never experienced anything like it before.
Both bands stopped playing. The excitement in the room built as the crowd began counting down to the New Year. “Ten! Nine! Eight! Seven! Six! Five! Four! Three! Two! One! Happy New Year!” The crowd roared as silver, gold, and white balloons fell from the ceiling.
Kadyn forgot all about the champagne as he scooped me up in his arms and planted a passionate kiss on my lips. Auld Lang Syne began to play; and everyone around us began to toast, sing, and dance. Kadyn handed our glasses to a nearby waiter, then twirled me around until he was firmly hugging my back against his chest. “Happy New Year,” he whispered in my ear.
I looked out over our friends and the beautiful concert hall. I turned back around in Kadyn’s arms and smiled. “Thanks to you.”
Kadyn gathered my face in his hands. His eyes locked on mine. “You know I love you?”
We stood there, two people alone in a crush of bodies. I silently studied Kadyn’s face; and a million snapshots in time flashed through my mind… the first time we met, our first date, the friends he had given me, the times he held me while I cried, the flight to Montana, the first time we made love, and the moment he had stood between Justin and me. Each memory whispered to my heart, and my heart beat back its response… slow at first, then hard and fast. The room spun as every last one of my defenses fell. I reached for Kadyn’s hands as they framed my face. My eyes sought his as I spoke. “I do. I do know you love me… and I love you too, Kadyn… with all my heart.”
* * * * * *
With the holidays behind us, the weeks melted away and quickly turned into months. It had been three months since the kidnapping. I was happier than I had ever been in my entire adult life, but I continued to struggle with nightmares, and my thoughts still turned to Justin at the most random times. He was locked in some high security detention facility near Trout Lake. He had pled not guilty and insisted on a trial. I found myself praying he would plea bargain, so I wouldn’t have to testify or face him in a trial.
I was
surprised I hadn’t heard anything from Michael. I wondered if he had heard about what happened with Justin and decided I had endured enough drama for one lifetime. I tried not to question it too much and just accept it for what it was.
We were discussing these developments one night at Kadyn’s apartment while eating pizza with our friends. Roger quickly steered us toward a more pleasant topic. “I know exactly what you need to chase all of those bad memories away.”
“What’s that?” I asked curiously.
Roger reached for another slice of pizza. “A vacation. Someplace fun.”
I set my pizza down, immediately enthralled with the idea. “A vacation,” I repeated, already picturing the possibilities.
“It’s almost spring break,” Gabi observed thoughtfully.
“We should go someplace warm… somewhere with a beach,” Marie suggested.
Everyone dropped his pizza and began researching possible destinations on his phone.
Mason looked up from his phone. “How about Jamaica?”
“I know. Cancun!” Cenia exclaimed.
“The Bahamas?” Gabi inquired, and we added it to the list.
I watched, thoroughly amused, as they began debating the merits of each of the vacation spots. “The Bahamas,” I said quietly, finally weighing in.
“The Bahamas,” Kadyn agreed with a smile; and the decision was made.
Chapter 14 – Only Time
I glanced at Cenia and Roger as we wheeled our luggage away from the shuttle that dropped us in front of our hotel. “I still can’t believe we all managed to get on the same flight!”
Phil and Marie fell in behind us, laughing.
We left Mason and Gabi sitting on a bench, surrounded by Gabi’s luggage. They were having some heated discussion about whether this trip to the Bahamas actually constituted a date. Gabi insisted that it did. Mason was still a firm “no.”
Kadyn and I smiled as we exchanged knowing looks.
We were checking into the hotel when I heard a familiar voice call out behind me. “Hi-ya, Krissy.”