by C. J. Miller
“Good thing I brought my pack,” Nathan said and grabbed it from the trunk.
She tugged a pair of ear warmers over her head and ignored him. She wanted to find the location where Blaine had slept when the last victim was killed. Knowing Blaine, he would have built a fire, meaning the remnants might still be there. Maybe there would be a second fire—anything to corroborate Blaine’s story that there had been three of them—the victim, Blaine and the Huntsman—that night in the backcountry.
Nathan caught her elbow. “I’m here. I want you to remember that. I’m here for you.”
Autumn started to turn away, but Nathan pressed a kiss to her lips that melted her from the inside. She leaned into it, sinking into soft, slow kisses. Nathan groaned and Autumn broke the kiss. Her relationship with Nathan had swung again from bitter cold to far too hot.
“We should focus,” Autumn said.
“I’ve been telling myself that since the day I met you.”
“What’s your secret?” Autumn said.
“Fake it, mostly,” he said. “But I’m here to support whatever you need. I want the Huntsman caught, too. If that means hands to myself, then okay.”
Autumn and Nathan set out on the trail, clomping over snow, careful of the places where ice had formed in small puddles. A few hundred feet away stood the hut where they’d found the journal.
Not surprisingly, the perimeter was marked with yellow crime-scene tape and a police officer was standing nearby, looking bored. Keeping her head down and staying off the main trail, Autumn circled around it. To his credit and her surprise, Nathan said nothing, followed close and didn’t make a sound. He didn’t question her dodging the police officer, nor the exact reasons for this trip.
When she was out of sight of the officer standing near the hut, she returned to the trail. She looked around, searching for any hint of where Blaine might have gone. In their youth, Blaine would take off when he found something he thought was worthy of inspection—following a stream to the source, examining a peculiarly shaped rock or hearing the sound of a bird or animal he wanted to investigate. He’d said he’d followed the hiker. Where had they peeled off?
She walked slowly, looking for boot prints, but it was impossible to distinguish one print from another, and with the snow leaving its heavy imprint on the land, most trail markings were smeared together. This path had been well traveled, likely by law enforcement on their way to the hut. She wouldn’t think about the possibility the snow had covered Blaine’s camp or had blotted out evidence to support Blaine’s story.
She’d find something. She had to help her brother. He was counting on her.
She pressed on, her feet slipping several times on the ice. She managed to keep her balance and avoid falling and caking herself with mud. It was too cold to be wet and she didn’t have time to stop and make a fire to dry herself. She reached subconsciously for the striker and flint around her neck, her companion on the trail, especially when she ventured into unfamiliar territory.
Though she didn’t relish it, she could survive in the wilderness for a number of days as long as she could make fire and find clean water. Her father had taught her and Blaine how to survive.
One of his first lessons was to stay calm no matter how difficult the situation became, and that lesson was helping her now. She was keeping it together for Blaine. She couldn’t help him if she was dissolving into tears every few minutes, giving in to the heavy ache of anxiety and fear that weighed on her.
She trudged on, barely hearing Nathan behind her. Several times, she pretended to check her compass to be sure he was following. She didn’t want him hurt or lost, and while he could protect her from a killer, she could protect him in the wild.
She hadn’t been paying as much attention as she should have to the location of the latest victim. She’d been worried about Blaine and distracted about the possibility of finding him dead. She hadn’t taken detailed notes of her surroundings. Asking Nathan would tip him off. Though she could confide in him, telling him her plan put him in a difficult place. He was her friend and her lover, for now, but he was also an FBI agent and the brother of one of the Huntsman’s victims.
She remained quiet and looked for anything familiar.
Autumn continued along the trail and stopped when she heard the distinct sound of rushing water. With the snowstorm, smaller steams may have frozen over, but the sun and the press of a fresh water supply up the mountain would break them open. A stream. Blaine or the hiker might have decided to follow a stream to keep from getting lost.
Reaching into her backpack, she withdrew her camera and took a picture of the area. Scanning close to the ground and not seeing a footpath, she made her own.
“I didn’t sleep with you because it was a challenge.”
Autumn whirled and nearly stumbled over an exposed tree root. They were the first words he’d spoken to her since leaving the truck. Why was he bringing that up? Any other time, he’d acted as though nothing had happened between them and he was fine with it. Now, when she was on a mission, he wanted to talk about their relationship. It hurt to talk about, hurt to acknowledge this thing between them that had started out with promise and was now confusing and sure to end in heartache. “Then why did you?”
Why did she ask questions to spur the conversation forward? She didn’t want to talk about this now. She had to concentrate on helping Blaine.
“It felt right.”
She scrutinized those three words. It. Felt. Right. And now? Did it feel wrong? She couldn’t bring herself to ask. She could live with him getting lost in the moment and sleeping with her, couldn’t she? She was a big girl. Her heart had taken worse beatings, and this one stung only because it was fresh.
She lifted her chin. “Glad to hear it.”
“I know you’re guarded. I’ve known from the first moment I saw you.”
“Then why bother getting involved with me? Or was that what you wanted? Something superficial and uncomplicated? You wanted someone closed off so you didn’t have to get involved.” As she spoke the words, she was aware they were her thoughts, as well. At least at first, she had wanted a torrid and sexy affair. Something to stroke her ego, and having a man like Nathan in her bed did just that. But then it had morphed into something else, and she was unprepared to cope with that.
Nathan didn’t answer immediately. He seemed to draw the words from somewhere in his soul. “I saw beyond those defenses to the bright, vibrant woman you are. Maybe I could see so easily because I have some of those same barriers. I am involved with you. What do you call what I’m doing right now?”
His admissions surprised her. “You can turn your emotions off like a switch.” She couldn’t do the same with hers. Letting Nathan past her defenses, going into town with him, taking him to her bed and spending time with him amounted to one clear, heavy conclusion. She was in love with him and she had no idea what to do about it.
He shook his head. “I can turn off displaying them. I’ve had relationship drama in the past and I want to avoid that. The more I’m attracted to a woman, the more drama seems to start. I’ve been attracted to you, almost impossibly so, from the first moment I met you. I didn’t want what we had to turn into fighting and tragedy.”
“From the moment you met me?”
Nathan threw up his hands. “Of course. I don’t know what happened to you to make you so reluctant to believe it, but know this. I am attracted to you. More than I’ve ever been attracted to another woman in my life. You are beautiful and smart, and being with you is an adventure. I’m sorry if I’ve hurt you.”
An emotional admission and an apology? It was a lot for her to process. “Don’t be sorry.” Why was it hard for her to accept that she and Nathan had the right chemistry? “Come on. We’ve got miles to go.”
Spinning on her heels, she proceeded along the path, trying to put h
erself in Blaine’s frame of mind. The stream. He would follow the stream. The snow wasn’t as heavy in this area, the trees holding a good portion of it in their branches.
“Will you please stop storming off every time I speak to you?” Nathan asked behind her.
She quickened her steps. Their conversation was taking a turn she wasn’t capable of handling. A few words couldn’t erase years of self-conscious thinking. If they kept speaking, she would confess she loved him, and then it would be so much worse. He wouldn’t say the words in return. She would have pulled the pin on a grenade and tossed it at him. “I am not storming off. I am trying to help my brother. If you’d rather not be here, then wait in the car.”
When he didn’t respond and it grew quiet, she felt a flare of panic he might have listened to her and given up. She looked over her shoulder to see him following, but at a farther distance.
A smug smile traced over his face. “You don’t want me to leave.”
Her cheeks heated. “I was making sure you were okay.”
“Sure.” He caught up to her and took her elbow. A course of sensual lightning ripped through her.
She faced him, holding the straps of her backpack to keep her hands from reaching for him. She might not be able to calm her heart’s excited reaction to him, but she could control her body. They weren’t animals.
“I know you’re scared your brother is in jail. I know that you think you don’t have anyone to lean on. But you can lean on me. You can count on me to be there for you through this. You want me to stop shutting you out. You have to do the same.”
Old insecurities flared. She didn’t want to misunderstand him and take a fool’s chance with her heart. “What part of this are you referring to? The investigation? The trial? What if my brother is wrongly convicted and goes to jail? He didn’t kill those people. He didn’t kill anyone.” Now that he’d started her on this topic, she couldn’t let go. If he wanted to know what she was thinking, if he wanted her to let him inside her most private thoughts, she would let him have it. “When we were children, Blaine could hardly stand to see an animal wounded much less another human. My dad and I were certified in first aid, but not Blaine. The sight of blood and injuries makes him sick. He didn’t kill those people, and while the FBI is wasting their time building a case against Blaine, the real killer is planning his next move.”
“If the Huntsman strikes while Blaine is in police custody, that will look good for his defense,” Nathan said.
“If I’m lucky, I can find proof to free Blaine and find the killer before he kills again.”
“A tall order, but I’m with you. What proof do you think we’ll find? What do you think you’ll find that hasn’t been brought into evidence by the rangers and the FBI?”
Could she risk telling him? Could she trust him? She chose her words carefully, hoping if this went wrong that Blaine wouldn’t blame her. “Blaine sometimes takes side trips off the trail.”
“You think he came out here.” He paused. “If you prove he was out here, you’re building a case for the prosecution.”
She gave him a cutting glower. “He wasn’t out here alone. The victim, the killer and Blaine were out here. Three of them.”
Nathan adjusted his pack. “How will you prove that?”
She hadn’t worked through those details. Her search was an act of faith mixed with a little desperation. “If I find more than one camp, if I can prove in the same time frame that the killer, Blaine and the victim were out here, that constitutes reasonable doubt.” Didn’t it?
Nathan continued up the mountain. “It’s a long stretch. You’d have to prove the other campsites were from the same time period.”
Determining when a fire was built, especially after a snowstorm, was close to impossible. But what about Blaine’s thoughts about the vines? Should she tell Nathan that Blaine had a theory about the Huntsman and his methods? “I can’t sit around and wait for Blaine to go to jail.” Doing something was better than nothing.
“You realize that anything I see I have to report as evidence.”
She huffed indignantly. “Oh, I realize it. What you don’t realize is my brother is innocent and anything we find will only help his defense.” She hoped. To date, the evidence she and Nathan had found had made it worse for Blaine.
Nathan grinned at her. “That’s the other thing I knew about you from the start. You’re loyal to a fault.”
“Blaine is family. Nothing is more important than family,” Autumn said.
“I feel the same about my sister,” Nathan said.
Sometimes she momentarily forgot she and Nathan were working this case for the people they loved. “When this is over, we’ll get what we want. You’ll find Colleen’s killer and Blaine will be free.”
“What if that’s not everything I want?” Nathan said. He looked her over from head to toe.
Autumn shivered. The implication that he wanted her was flattering, but impractical. They weren’t a couple that made sense. They didn’t have a future. “I belong at the Trail’s Edge. It’s my home. It always has been. You belong to the FBI.”
She didn’t need to state the obvious. Their worlds had collided for this investigation, but otherwise, they were too different to work together.
* * *
The hike to the top of the stream took most of the afternoon. The ground was uneven and the brush thick and gnarled. Ground cover clung to the soil partially hidden by snow, making natural trip wires Nathan caught in the tips of his boots several times. When they reached the place where a larger river fed the stream they’d been following, Autumn shrugged off her pack and sat on the ground.
Nathan did the same, sitting across from her, forcing her to look at him. “Do you need water?”
She shook her head and patted her pack. “I have some.”
Autumn’s belief her brother was innocent was unwavering and she seemed convinced she would find something to prove it. He didn’t think an old campsite proved anything. He didn’t voice those opinions. She was edgy enough.
He should have expected her reaction—the anger, the irritation and even the flashes of warmth, yet he was unprepared for his reaction to her. He’d sworn that any future offer of protection or rescue was in the vein of his job as her partner in finding Colleen’s killer. But being alone with Autumn tore the best of intentions to shreds. He couldn’t stop thinking about the leanness in her legs and the firmness of her butt as she walked ahead of him. The brown fabric of her pants highlighted her natural slenderness. Autumn looked graceful as she hiked.
She pushed his buttons and she didn’t seem to realize she was doing it.
That her brother was a suspect didn’t dampen his lust for her. That he was dedicated and focused on the case, to finding Colleen’s killer, didn’t squelch the need to take Autumn in his arms and taste her, touch her and hold her. Even her anger, which thinly masked the fear she was carrying, didn’t turn off his raging libido. Instead, it made him think of having fast, heated sex with her, followed by slow, passionate making up.
Autumn came to her feet and brushed off her backside. “He’d probably make his camp beneath a tree. He wouldn’t chance looking for a cave that might already have animals in it. Blaine is terrified of bats and of being cornered by an animal.”
Nathan rolled to his feet and took a step closer to her. Even with a half day’s grime on her, she smelled delicious and looked even better. A few strands of hair had worked themselves loose from her ponytail and she had a brush of dirt near her temple, likely where she had tucked her hair away from her face.
She glanced toward the sky, shielding her eyes with her hand. She pointed to a location about fifty feet away and three hundred feet up. “I want to see this area from the top of that peak.”
The stone ledge jutted from the ground, the river intersecting it, an odd structure in
an otherwise fluid incline.
He lifted a brow. “How do you plan to get up there?”
“Climb.” She said it matter-of-factly, as if it wasn’t dangerous and risky. He wasn’t a skilled climber and wouldn’t be able to keep up with her.
“Is it safe?”
She shrugged. “Maybe.”
He didn’t like the sound of maybe, not when they were talking about her life. “Why don’t we scout the area first and save the climbing as a last resort?”
“We’re losing daylight. Once I find Blaine’s site, I need to track it to the location of the victim and look for evidence someone else was here.”
Something wasn’t adding up and his instincts prickled. It was as if she had a plan more detailed than looking for campsites. Stomping around in the forest looking for evidence that could be anywhere was ludicrous. She wasn’t an illogical woman. She knew something more. “Tell me what’s going on.”
A trace of mistrust lit in her eyes and it wounded him more than he cared to admit. She didn’t trust him. After all they had been through, her walls were still in place.
“Don’t get in my way, Nathan.”
With that, she marched in the direction of the peak, along the river.
He could physically stop her, possibly carry her down the trail kicking and screaming, but she would return the moment she could, her anger for him multiplying. He followed, unsure how to talk her out of this. The river was wide near the base of the rock structure, narrowing as it moved jaggedly down the mountain.
“Can we walk around and move up the peak where it’s less steep?” he asked. Another path had to lead to the peak.
She threw back her shoulders. “It will take too long.”
Nathan gritted his teeth. The more he tried to convince her not to do this, the more she would insist she follow through.
She pointed a few yards down. “I can chimney climb up that way.”
A chimney climb involved her bracing her weight on her legs on opposite sides of the opening and maneuvering between the large rocks. She wouldn’t have a safety harness, and from her vantage point, she couldn’t see clear to the top of the peak.