“So I just sentence thousands to die?” I stared at my hand. I watched the crimson drops slide along my knuckles. “Because he will kill them, Alex. He’s already killing them. Every day the war goes on.”
My twin didn’t answer.
“I… I’m not a fool.” I sucked in a breath. “I knew it m-might come to him or us.” Did I? Or am I just lying to myself? “I knew we might h-have to…” I couldn’t say the words. I couldn’t admit it existed. “But I just thought… I just thought that, if he surrendered, Nyx would spare him. I knew she wasn’t happy when I asked, and I knew his brother was king when we struck the deal, but I…”
But a part of me had truly believed that, if Darren surrendered, she would uphold our pact.
My nails dug into the cuts in my palm. I was such a fool to pretend we were on the same battlefield. Things had changed. “He’ll probably kill me first… He already heard what I have to say.”
“Ryiah—”
“No.” I shook my head, locks flying in front of my face. “Quinn’s right. I already gave him a chance, Ella.” A bolt of shame shot down my spine. “This isn’t about what I want. It’s what’s best for the whole.” Even if it wasn’t fair to him.
“Ryiah.” Alex grabbed my wrist and forced me to unclench my hand. “Did you believe Derrick the first time he came to you?”
“N-no—”
“Then why should you expect it of Darren? You didn’t have any proof. It was his brother or his wife. Lucius and Blayne spent years making him believe a lie, and you only had a week and a half.”
My palm tingled as Alex’s casting commenced on my hand.
“Nyx is wrong.” My twin’s voice was barely a whisper as he leaned in close. “I’m not saying she doesn’t have the people in mind, she does, but she is thinking like a leader and forgot what it’s like to be a person.” He and Ella exchanged a meaningful look. “Nyx’s decision might be right for them. It might be the best decision a leader can make. I might even agree with her, but it doesn’t mean you have to.”
“I can’t outrun them, not like this.” I stared, unblinking, as the skin stitched together along my knuckles. It wasn’t the most pleasant sensation. “What are you saying, Alex?”
“I’m saying there are three choices, not two. And Ella and I can help make the third one happen.”
The third one?
“When the group locates Darren, we will make sure you have a head start. An hour, two at most.” He was pacing. “If the plan works, and I’m not saying it will, you get Darren to call off his men and leave Jerar. But if you take too long, they’ll catch up.”
I swallowed, realizing what Alex meant.
“Lie to them.” Ella locked her gaze on my own. “Tell them you’ll cooperate, and we’ll handle the rest.”
Alex’s hand found his wife’s and a knot jumped in his throat as he spoke. “Do you understand why they wanted you as a lure, Ryiah?”
It should have hurt to say, but instead, I felt nothing. “They think that out of the entire regiment, I’m the one person Darren will seek to dispose of himself.”
“Emotion is the one thing that will leave Darren open to mistakes.” Ella looked to the ground. “His defense won’t be what it should when he is facing you, but neither will yours…”
“There’s a good chance he’ll kill you, Ryiah. I know you want to believe…” My brother thrust his jaw out and ground the next words out like he was swallowing glass. “But if it were Ella and me, I’d make the same reckless choice. I’d want you to give me the same choice.”
16
I delivered an ultimatum. It was a lie, of course.
“I’m the only way you are going to win this war.” Alex was the one who had given me the idea. “I’m the best lure you have and the one chance to catch Darren off guard. Without me, the lot of you will never stand a chance. You want the bloodshed to stop? You want a chance to end this?”
Silence. I had their attention.
“Then you forget Nyx’s orders and you listen to me. She may have the people’s best interests at heart, but I am the one you need. If Darren surrenders and calls off his army, you are going to look the other way and let him escape. He’ll never return to Jerar and make a play for the throne, but he will live.”
Quinn frowned, but he didn’t outright deny my request. They needed me to get close to Darren. The two of us knew it, and he didn’t act the fool by denying it. He had probably thought I would accept the role outright, after all I had done for the cause.
“And what if he refuses to surrender? What then?”
“You carry out Nyx’s order.”
“You won’t try to stop us?”
My laugh was bitter. “It wouldn’t really matter, would it? We all know I’ll be dead before anyone else.”
For a moment, the leader said nothing, studying my face. Then he turned to the others. Out of the corner of my eye, I could see the dissent in their eyes.
“She’s the best chance we’ve got.”
“But to go against Nyx’s orders!” The older woman from before spoke up. “To betray our commander, all for some lovesick girl?”
“Ryiah is not just some ‘lovesick’ girl.” Ray shoved his way forward. “She’s the best mage in the room, in the kingdom second to him!”
“Our goal is to end bloodshed.” Lief still wouldn’t look at me. “Whether or not we agree with her, too many have given up their lives for this cause. If we can end it, does it matter who we betray?”
“Klaus? Jeremiah?” Quinn cleared his throat. “Anyone else?” The group had stopped its collective arguments. “Ian, any final words?”
The mage shook his head, his eyes never leaving my face. There was a storm brewing beneath the surface, but whatever he was feeling, he was not about to admit it in front of the others.
“Very well. Ryiah, we accept your terms.”
I nodded. Beside me, I felt Alex and Ella let out a long sigh of relief. They believed us.
Of course, they were probably lying right back. For all I knew, they were planning to go back on our promise. As far as they were concerned, they just needed my presence. The moment we arrived, I’d have no control over their actions.
It didn’t matter, though.
Alex and Ella would find a way to drug them before they ever got their chance. I wouldn’t warn Darren there were others. In the event I failed, the rest of our party would still have the distraction they needed.
* * *
“You shouldn’t have done it…” Ian stepped out from the brush behind me. “Forcing Quinn’s hand was a mistake.”
I busied myself filling a skin in the running stream. We had stopped to make camp for the night, and the others had given me the easiest task since I was still recovering. “Nyx left me no choice.”
“He’s king.” The mage shoved his hands in his pockets. “What else did you expect, Ryiah? Darren’s men are waging a war on the border as we speak. You can’t just look the other way and expect everyone to pardon his crimes.”
I met Ian’s glower with one of my own. “I thought you were on my side.”
“I believe you have the right to walk away.” His arms folded across his chest. “But you do not have the right to put the rest of our party at risk. This isn’t your love story, Ryiah. This is about the crimes against a nation.”
I cocked my head to the side. “And live on the run while the rest of you go off and get yourselves killed?”
“Nyx asked more from you than any of us.” His jaw was set. “You’ve served the cause well. You don’t need his death on your conscience. It would destroy you. Let someone else take that role.”
I found myself growling. “What makes you so sure Darren won’t listen?”
“He’s too far gone.” My friend had the decency to look away. “You’ve always been blind where Darren is concerned, Ryiah. He’s not like us. And perhaps that’s what drew you to him in the first place, but it’s going to kill you if you continue on this path.”
<
br /> “You are wrong.”
“If you were anyone else, I’d say go on ahead, but you are a liability, Ryiah.”
“A liability?” My teeth gnashed together. “You think I’m not good enough? Second-rank doesn’t stand a chance against the Black Mage? I’m the best you’ve got.”
“I know you are good enough. That’s never been the problem.” Ian’s jaw locked. “The problem is you won’t fight back.”
“I would. If I—”
“Liar. You still believe you can save him.”
All I could hear was the quiet lull of the stream pooling against rocks.
“If he tries to kill you, Ryiah, are you going to fight back? If Darren leaves you no choice, would you kill him to save yourself? To save Jerar?”
“It won’t come to that.”
“It already has.”
I couldn’t stand there a moment longer. The strings of hysteria tugged at my lungs. I wanted to run away from Ian and Nyx, away from all of these choices I was never meant to make.
“Look me in the eyes and tell me you don’t hold yourself responsible for what he’s become. That you won’t try to save him even if it means betraying everyone else.”
My mind flashed to that day in the training room, to Darren and me and the darkness that followed. “Run away with me.” I’d been willing to do it then.
No.
I was done listening to this two-faced traitor that I had once called a friend. He didn’t know me, and he didn’t know Darren.
“You are wrong.”
Ian had never seen that broken prince on the cliffs. He didn’t know about the little boy and his father, or the nights after Derrick died and the way my husband had held me to keep me from madness.
Ian only saw an entitled king who was following in his brother’s footsteps.
“Darren will surrender,” I hissed, “and I’ll save everyone. Every. Last. One. Of. Them.”
The mage crossed his arms and glared at me. “You’re not just lying to me, Ryiah. You are lying to yourself.”
“What a shame it’s Quinn’s decision and not yours.”
“I’ll talk him around.”
Go ahead and try.
“You are with me or against me, Ian.” My words were cold. “But you will not stop me.”
The mage marched off back to camp without looking back.
* * *
“Nyx gave the rest of the regiment a choice, even the ones that didn’t know.” Alex’s voice boomed in my ears as his horse continued to climb the rocky expanse.
We had ridden for four days.
Narrow mountain trails in the heart of the Iron Range and the elevation were part of the trek. We couldn’t rely on the King’s Road if we were to catch the Crown’s Army by surprise and the result was heavy tension among the party the further we climbed. None of us were immune to the dangers that lay ahead. The moment we reached the border, we would be in a race for our lives.
Only Alex—sweet, charming, somewhat oblivious Alex—seemed not to take note. My brother had spent most of the hours seeing to my treatment and answering my questions along the way as everyone else carried on in silence. Perhaps he was the wisest; anxiety only led to mistakes.
“The ones that didn’t know were smart enough not to put up a fight.” Ella pulled up beside us on her mare. We were passing through a narrow canyon and her voice echoed along the walls. “A few fled, but most took up the cause, and the ones that did… well, we knew it was only a matter of time before the Crown found out either way. Alex and I left that very same day.”
Almost all the villagers northwest of the keep were gone. The few that we passed stood out like the straggled remains of a husk. The buildings and farms were empty. Even the livestock were missing. “They took what they could and joined our cause. Even the ones that didn’t know about us, they had friends and family at the keep. Nyx sent a couple of envoys to warn the others and give them the same choice.” Alex pointed to the road leading east. “The ones closer to Montfort are more loyal to the Crown. I’m sure they chose to remain.”
“They did.” Jeremiah spoke up quietly to our right. Unlike Ian, the others were still willing to talk to me. “We lost a few of our men that delivered the message. The local command dispatched a couple of his knights to hunt them down on behalf of the Crown. Only half of ours made it back.”
My stomach churned. I didn’t want to talk about the villagers any longer.
Even into the beginning of spring, the north was rock encrusted in ice. Everything was sharp and slick. Barren twigs snapped under the horses’ hooves the higher we climbed, and our voices got lost to the wind. The sixth day, I was closer to the border than I’d ever been during my patrols in the keep’s regiment. It was cold.
Since the rebels hadn’t been in immediate danger, they’d had time to pack supplies. But Alex and Ella had taken off right away for the capital. Their pack was much like my own, and none of us had brought gear for the climate ahead. Each night the three of us took turns casting heat to keep our tent warm, always choosing a protruding ridge to shield us from the worst of the northern winds. The others lent us what they could, some furs and durable wool, but it never seemed enough.
Toward the end of the week, I was ready to collapse. My fever was gone, but what ailments I’d lost had been replaced with a fear of black frost and survival ahead.
Hiking in snow wasn’t like the mountains back home. I sweated constantly underneath my new layers of fur. I continuously stripped layers only to pile them back on as the next drift caught me unaware.
We also had to travel on foot: we couldn’t risk the horses lacerating a leg and taking a rider over a slippery ledge. That, and we didn’t want to tire them out even more. Like us, the beasts had to work extra hard in snow. The drying process from cold sweat could take hours. The horses carried our supplies, and that had to be enough.
Eventually, we reached a flat expanse of white. Little bits of green dotted the edge. At its base was a thick, coursing river. The water was black. I cringed; the sound of the current alone was enough to assure me that whoever fell would live all of five minutes at best, going into shock after three seconds.
We had reached the border of Jerar. The river divided two kingdoms as it snaked along the northern divide.
Across the ravine was a range three times the size of our own, towering over the border like a giant among ants. It was covered in snow.
While we had four seasons, Caltoth only had one.
Ella took one look ahead and rolled her eyes. “Of course,” she was muttering, “of course it would have to be somewhere cold.”
“It’s not that bad.” Alex wore a rakish grin. Ella and Ray had been taking to the snow much worse than the rest of us. “We’ve been camping out in the snow for over a week. You knew Caltoth would be worse.”
Ray’s reply was instantaneous: “Worse is an understatement.”
Ella shot her husband a look. “This is where the Shadow God sends the worst of us to live out an eternity of sin.”
Alex and I hid a smile behind our hands. We didn’t like the look of Caltoth either, but something about their dramatics was enough to liven the mood.
The three of us dismounted and approached the ledge with careful footing.
“Where is the army?” I started. “I only see mountains.” It didn’t help that the worst of them were right to our east. I couldn’t see beyond them; a pit was beginning to form in the base of my stomach.
A moment later, Quinn confirmed the worst of my fears.
“That’s because we are going to take the glacial pass. It’s dangerous, but that will play to our advantage.” Our leader took a spot next to the three of us, clutching a heavy, weathered scroll. “King Horrace gave us a layout of the land before we left. Nyx knew Darren would favor the main road since it’s the easiest passage for a regiment the size of the Crown’s Army. Once we ascend the pass”—his eyes flew at the intimidating wall to our east—“we will have the element of surp
rise. The Crown’s Army would never expect an attack from the west, and there is an overlook just beyond it. The lookout isn’t much of an asset, almost impossible to scale, but multiple sources suggested Commander Audric was going to station his command there to oversee the battle. If Darren is leading the mages, it’s very likely he will be stationed somewhere nearby.”
“What if he isn’t?”
Quinn massaged his shoulder with a groan; the endless days were getting to everyone. “Even if he isn’t, Commander Audric will be able to lead us to wherever they’ve hidden their king. We just need to find the neck of the beast, and the rest will follow.”
Don’t. I breathed out through my nose, crippling the sensation somewhere inside. I’d lasted this long without breaking apart, and now that I could see the final leg of our journey, nothing would change.
“Ryiah?” Ella leaned in, and I took a step back. I couldn’t talk about it. I just needed to focus on now.
Alex took over for my silence.
“How are we getting the horses to the other side?”
“We aren’t. We set them free and cast our way across. We’ll spend the final leg of our journey on foot.” The head mage pointed to our packs. “Divide up the final provisions and carry the saddlebags on your back. Bring nothing that is not absolutely necessary to our survival.”
The group had already set to dispersing supplies. Weapons were passed around, flint and steel, thick wool, a couple of flasks, salve and bandages, a small metal pot that we could heat for cooking and drink, and a ration of dry ingredients like Borean rice and bits of bone for broth. A half hour later, we were ready to depart.
I shifted uncomfortably along the ledge. Even though the packs were light, we all had two steel picks and a pair of woven, rawhide rackets attached to our straps. Not to mention the trappings for our tent, weapons, rations for food, and the heavy sleeping rolls that we couldn’t leave behind.
Everything weighed more when you were hiking in snow; I would have preferred to crawl among sand.
Last Stand: The Black Mage Book 4 Page 24