“Patience is not a virtue I possess.”
His lips returned to mine and he glided a hand down the length of my body, curving around my butt, and rested on the back of my thigh, causing me to arch into him. My hands trailed down his sides, finding the edge of soft fabric of his old t-shirt, I pulled it up and got it caught on his shoulders. We laughed because it was an awkward moment of him caught in his shirt and I pushed to get it off him.
He leaned back and I got a view of his lean stomach, his strong chest, and then he was back down on me, kissing me, and his hesitancy, his patience was gone. I felt the change and I wanted to yell for joy. His kisses were deep, his hands were everywhere on my body, exploring and reaching for my clothes and I couldn’t believe how much I had craved his touch and how long he’d made me wait. I smiled to myself, who ever heard of the girl waiting for the guy, but then again Jack was different and right now he was mine.
My shirt was trapped on my body while I was pinned beneath him and I wanted to feel his bare skin on me, no shirt, no swimsuit, nothing. He rolled to the side of me and I didn’t wait for him to reach for my shirt. I grabbed it and ripped it off of me, but he didn’t roll back on me and I regretted his absence. Instead he breathed warm kisses on my stomach, sadly slowing the pace way down again. My stomach quivered under each kiss and I felt like I was about to come out of my skin when he nipped my flesh right above the button of my jean shorts.
I looked down at him and I saw a new smile on Jack’s face, one of seduction and mischief combined and I thought this might be my favorite smile on him. His hand deftly, but slowly, undid the button and my heartbeat slammed against my chest. Maybe this pace wasn’t so bad.
His mouth traced a path up my stomach and when he stopped at my ear again, I heard myself say his name, and finally he did lose control. Our clothes came off in what seemed like seconds. My breaths were coming quickly and heavily and it was all I could do to focus on him until I no longer could tell where he ended and I began.
But in the end, it didn’t matter because I felt more alive with him than I ever had before.
“Yeah, sand in all these places would be bad,” I said when he finally, much to my chagrin stopped kissing me. He laughed out loud and with my head against his chest, I heard it deep within him and I wasn’t not sure I had ever heard anything richer than his laughter.
“See I know what I’m doing,” he said. I looked up at him. His one arm is draped around me. The other was bent behind his head. He looked sated. I didn’t know if I should be happy or rallying for round two. “This is where you say, ‘Yeah, Jack, you do.”
“Yeah, Jack, you do,” I said with a smile. He squeezed my side.
My phone started to buzz and I reached for my jeans. It’s Joe and I immediately become aware of the time. Three hours! Three hours had gone by.
“Girl,” I heard him ground out at me. “You better be on your way.”
“I am!” I squeaked at him.
Jack held up his hands and mouths ten at me.
“Ten minutes. I’ll be there in ten minutes.”
I hung up the phone and scrambled for my clothes. I grabbed my shirt and realized it was covered in dirt. How we managed to blow through three hours and get the shirt I needed to wear to work dirty was beyond me. Well, it wasn’t but Joe was not going to be pleased if I came in there dirty and grimy.
I saw Jack about to reach for his shirt and I snatched it up.
“I need a clean shirt,” I said with a smile that I hope said, ‘Please let me wear it.’
“Go ahead. I have another one in my truck.”
I threw it on and started moving to his truck. He grabbed the blanket and jumped in the driver seat, started it up and sped down the dirt road to get me to work.
He dropped me off at the parking lot.
I leaned over and kiss him on the mouth, hard and wished I could get lost in him again. I slid out and through the window and said, “I hope you know I’m keeping this forever.”
“I hope you do. It looks good on you, Rem.”
My cheeks flush at the memory, one I’ve relived too many times to count, and each time the memory feels overpowering and I wonder what it would be like to be with him again.
Jared whistles to get my attention and waves a hand in my face, bringing me back to reality. “We’re done, Remy.”
I try to regain my composure.
“Already?”
“Yep,” he says as he takes a last drink of his coffee.
“What do I owe you guys?”
“It’s free Remy,” Jack says over Jared’s shoulder.
“Glad to help,” Jared says, grabs his tool belt and walks away, quickly.
Jack’s still standing there, with his back to me, facing the ocean. He still loves it, especially in the morning, before life gets busy. I should wake up early more often and appreciate this gift I have from my grandparents. I stand, coming up to the new steps they just built. He’s two steps lower.
“You still have my shirt?” he says out to the ocean without looking at me. I want him to look at me.
“I told you I would keep it forever.”
“I thought forever was only three months long,” and his words cut me because that’s all we had and it is going to have to last forever.
I exhale a puff of air, unsure of what to say next. I can’t be obnoxious with him. I can’t be flirty with him. I can’t be me with him.
“Do you want it back?” I ask and hold my breath hoping he doesn’t say he does. This shirt on several occasions, including the night Tom first hit me, is what I sleep in. It is my security blanket, it is the closest thing I will get to having Jack near me and the feeling the world is right.
He turns, a sweet smile on his tanned face.
“Nah, it looks good on you, Rem,”
My heart flip-flops in my chest when he says this. And for that brief moment, I get my Jack and know he’s got that memory too, but the moment is over and he’s walking away. I watch him get in his truck, where Jared is waiting.
Chapter 6
JM
“What’s with you?” Jared asked me as we stepped on to the porch of Joe’s.
I just looked at him.
“You seem like, I don’t know, like you just got laid or something,” he said as he walked through the doors. I was relieved he didn’t see my face; it would have told him he had just guessed correctly and well, I wasn’t ready to share that with anyone yet, well anybody but Remy.
My eyes adjusted quickly to the darkness, and I found her, there behind the bar, smiling at a patron, wearing my shirt. The shirt was big on her and she had tied it and rolled it in the back to make it fit better. Part of her stomach was exposed and her hair was in its usual messy bun on the top of her head. God, she was beautiful.
Jared hadn’t waited for me, and found us two seats at the bar. I walked over to him and finally caught her eye. She smiled immediately at me, and maybe she felt the look on her face was too telling like I had just felt. She looked away, trying to hide the smile that lit up her face. She failed, miserably and after a few attempts at composure, she gave in and just smiled.
Within a few minutes, she made her way down to us.
“What can I get the two most handsome guys in this place?”
Jared looked around. “That doesn’t say much, Rem. It’s still early.”
She laughed.
“I’ll have a beer,” I said.
“Make it two,” Jared added.
She turned and grabbed our beers and started a tab. Jared was right, it wasn’t terribly busy yet, but she had a full bar and a few tables. The waitress was running back and forth and Remy made the drinks for her. Joe barked several orders out at both girls. They did as he asked, but not before Remy quirked an eyebrow at him each time.
He mumbled something about an attitude problem and being late each time she did.
“Something is different,” Jared commented.
I didn’t respond. I took a drink inste
ad.
He spun the coaster a few times.
“Isn’t that your shirt she’s wearing?”
I almost spit out my beer. Remy heard him, because her back stiffened and she looked into the mirror at me. Her eyes were wide.
“Oh, now I get it. You two did it.” He laughed once and took a drink.
I still said nothing.
“Nothing to say?” he pressed. “It wasn’t good, was it?”
Remy’s reaction was sharp. She turned immediately to me, eyes glaring, daring me to say the wrong thing.
“I think I finally found something Remmington Crawford is touchy about. Her sex skills.”
She gained her composure almost immediately. “Jared Albright, you wish you could get with this.”
“Girl!” Joe barked from the other end of the bar. She raised an eyebrow at me this time.
“I haven’t said anything.” She walked away. I really didn’t want to be on her bad side. I was hoping to get laid a little later tonight.
“Well?” Jared asked, not letting it go.
“Well, what?” I finally asked.
“Was it good?”
I laughed a little not really wanting to share anything of the afternoon with anyone, but also wanting to brag a little.
“Dude, we are best friends. I’m not asking you for the dirty details. I am asking you to let me know if it was good. She’s gorgeous. She’s funny. She’s smart. She sees something in your sorry ass. I’m assuming it was great sex and you should share that with me.”
“It was fuckin’ amazing. I want to do it again. I want to do it a lot.” Which was the God’s honest truth.
“Yeah, buddy!” He slapped me on the back. “I should have totally gone after her that night we first met her. I could be that happy right now.”
“Too bad, Jare. She’s mine.”
“I know. I’ll kick myself forever for it.”
She worked. I watched and revisited the memory of her skin and the sweet smile she gave me. It was a perfect memory and one I hoped to recreate, over and over again.
She popped over to grab a beer for us, bring us food, and each time Jared had some comment to make to her about sex. She handled it well.
“What are you doing later?” she asked me around ten. The bar wasn’t busy, but I doubted on a Tuesday she’d be open past midnight in this town.
“How much later?”
“Like after my shift,” and those words alone excited me, but it was the look in her eyes, like she was the one undressing me, like she was the one who was eager to recreate what happened this afternoon.
“Whatever you want to do,” I said and meant it, but really hoped I wasn’t reading her signals wrong.
“Whatever I want?”
God, yes! I wanted to scream at her and drag her out right then.
“Yeah,” I replied instead.
“I’m going to hold you to it,” she said and walked away.
“I need to find a ride home?” Jared asked.
“You sure ain’t coming with me.”
“It’s fine. I like that brunette over there,” and with that, he left me at the bar for the night.
The memory of our first time together floods my mind. Good thing I know this town like the back of mind, because I can’t concentrate on anything other than Remy in my shirt. I was happy to move on to the memory. The memory that comes before her and the bar that night are distracting and so easy to relive. I couldn’t go home to Amber thinking about it. It wasn’t fair. I had to keep telling myself that.
I shouldn’t have gone over to Remy’s to begin with. It had been Jared’s idea. He had mentioned to my father that he was going to go fix Remy’s stairs in the morning and be late to work. My father had said it was good of him and that he could count it on the clock. My father has always taken care of Jared. I believe Jared is a better person because of my father. I think they both believe it, too.
Jared never asked if I wanted to help with the stairs. Even after my dad gave the approval, he didn’t. He was keeping me out of it.
Before he climbed in his truck, I asked, “Why are you doing it?”
“I’m a good guy,” he said sarcastically, though I know it is covering up the real intention.
“Jared.”
“Alright. I don’t want that douche around her. She’s by herself. I can help her out.”
“I’ll go with you.”
“You don’t have to. I can take care of her for you. I can help you this way.”
“I know, but,” I don’t know what to say that doesn’t make me sound like an asshole in Amber’s case or Remy’s case.
“You just want to be around her.”
I nod once.
“Whatever. Be at her house early.”
I should have just let him go by himself.
But she calls to me. She literally could get me to do things I would never do. She pushed me, she challenged me, and I did it because I never wanted to be without her.
“Come on!” she called to me. “It’ll be fun!” She turned away with a bright smile on her face. It was then, in our relationship, I realized she lived for adventure, the dare, the chase, and the excitement. That was what life was about to her. A part of me wanted to be more like her, a little less safe.
And she made me want to be like that, too.
She continued to climb higher and higher. She even slipped a little, causing pieces of the rock to chip away and land at my feet. I watched as she climbed.
“I’m going to be beat you Jack! Do you want to be beat by a girl?” she called.
She was almost to the top.
I hated heights. Absolutely hated them, but for her, I would climb. I grabbed a hand hold, a few feet above my head, jumped a little to catch another, and began a slow, fearful climb up the side of the rock. My stomach clenched. I felt my palms begin to sweat, and fear I would fall to my death, from ten feet above. I wanted to puke.
“You’re almost up here, Jack! It’s beautiful!” her voice carried down to ease my anxiety, and while it didn’t leave me, I knew I had to get to her. If I could get to her, this would go away.
I climbed, and climbed more when I saw her sneakers, ankles, knees, shorts, and finally I was face to face with her. Wisps of her hair framed her face now, she was even a little sweaty, but I didn’t know if she had ever looked more beautiful than she did at this moment.
“It’s worth it, isn’t it?” she asked, referring to the climb and the view. It was awesome to see the ocean from this high up and that far away. She looked back at me.
“Yeah,” I responded, but I meant her, not the climb. She saw what I meant by my answer.
And while her smile was always big and bright, this one was softer, close lipped, and sweet. This was a smile I would later discover was meant only for me. And I would only get them on moments, like this, when I was in awe of what she could get me to do.
We sat up there all afternoon. She leaned up against me. And she talked about everything, her plans, her parents, her friends from back home, and I wasn’t sure I said a word.
When it was time for us to head down, the vice on my stomach started to tighten as I looked over the edge. I hadn’t realized she had stepped away, until I heard her giggle.
“Where are you going?” I asked.
“To use the trail to get to the bottom.”
“What trail,” I asked.
“The one right here,” she laughed. She was twenty feet from me now. There was a dip in the rocks, and all I could see was her upper torso.
“There’s a trail?” I asked as I walked over to her.
“Yeah, didn’t you know?” she laughed again.
“Why didn’t we use the trail?” Why did I have to climb up the side of a mountain, I think.
“Where’s the fun in that, Jack?” I felt like I should be mad at her, for causing me anxiety, but she reached out her hand for mine and together we walked down the path.
I take a swig of water trying to wash away the m
emory of her.
Chapter 7
RC
“I was thinking we should go on a date.”
Steve’s all confidence. I knew this was coming. He’s dropped by Joe’s and sent too many texts for it not to have been.
He’s one hundred percent sure I’m going to say yes.
Why can’t I say yes? I have no reason to sit at home when I’m not at the bar. This is my fresh start, my do over. And my do over starts with a date with a guy named Steve whose lines aren’t going to work on me. I get to do this.
“Yes,” I say and am surprised by the fact it feels good. I’m not crazy attracted to him. But he is handsome. He wants to have fun. I want to have fun. No one is saying it has to be forever.
His smile isn’t one of relief that I had said yes, it was more of a: I knew you would. Slightly annoying. I don’t want to be predictable. I would need to work on this.
“Pick you up at eight?”
“Great,” I say and I begin to think about what to wear. It’s been a long time since I have been on a date. Years actually. And my first date is going to be with Steve, a kid I thought was a total flop when I met him. I can’t help it. I laugh.
“What’s so funny?” he asks.
Plan Unpredictable step one. “Nothing,” I say with a smile and a look that I hope conveys I’m not going to let him know.
“Okay,” he says, a little thrown, but not by much. “Okay,” he says again, regaining his composure. “I’ll see you tonight.” He gives me a wink and I laugh at the cheese factor. But maybe a little cheese and a little over the top flirting would be good. This would all be good.
I go into the house and wonder what the hell I am going to do for four hours. Mia is all about naps during the day in Georgia, that and air conditioning. Not having friends in South Shore is becoming problematic. I just don’t like meeting people. I really don’t want to meet any girls. I just can’t handle it, and after Amber’s friend’s brilliant performance at Joe’s last week, I really don’t need that crap in my life.
That Summer Page 5