by Noah Harris
“Uh...Y-Yeah. Yeah,” Barry nodded, finding a lump in his throat.
“The storm is over. Quite a bit of wreckage down below.”
“Ah.”
“Nothing that can’t be fixed, though.”
“Okay.”
Xanathen’s brow lowered as he scowled at Barry, his yellow eyes gleaming. “I can see how this is going to be. Fine. You have questions. I have answers. Ask away. I’ll answer the first one you have: Yes. I am indeed a dragon. Don’t ask that one again.”
“I...uh...I think that’s the only one I’ve got?”
“Really? You had so many more questions to shout at me before!”
“This is just a lot to take in. There are no dragons in the United States. Dragons, where I come from, aren’t real.”
“What? That’s nonsense, of course there are dragons there. We dragons are everywhere.”
“No, they aren’t. I’ve never seen them.”
“There’s one right in front of you, isn’t there? That should be proof enough that we exist,” Xanathen replied, the fins on his neck pricking up defensively.
“I...” Barry trailed off, paying special attention to the fins arching like hair on a cat’s back. After seeing his rows of teeth, he felt it better to leave that specific topic alone for now. “So this is a whole island of dragons?”
“I don’t want to talk about that.”
“What the hell?” Barry retorted, losing his composure, “You said you’d answer my questions, and now you’re avoiding them?”
Xanathen’s lips spread and revealed the wall of teeth in a satisfied grin. Barry felt goosebumps crawl down his back at the sight of it.
“Your fire has returned. Excellent,” Xanathen purred. Barry broke out in even more goosebumps. “I like that fire in you. It makes you more fun to be around.”
“Thanks. I mean, dammit, so...dragons? This island? Are there more?”
Xanathen’s eyes darted off to the side as he rested his head on the floor. Silence punctuated the moment as Barry looked on, slowly putting his hand to his mouth. He looked at the dragon who just the night before had seemed so intimidating. Now, he lay on the floor of the cave, his eyes wide with agonizing grief. Barry’s face sunk to a frown as he silently felt all of the loneliness that wafted from Xanathen’s miserable eyes. He felt the hundreds of years of solitude slowly age him and his heart began to snap in two under the pressure of it all. He walked up cautiously to Xanathen, and placed a trembling hand to his scaly side.
“I...I’m sorry,” Barry’s hushed voice wavered.
“My father came here many centuries ago. He helped the people of this island, and created a whole new life for them. There were many of us back then, and we lived in harmony with the humans here. When I was but a little wyrmling, that was when ‘the others’ came. It’s almost funny. We dragons have scales tougher than any metal, but it couldn’t protect us against the disease they brought.”
“Everyone?”
“This has been my island for most of my life,” Xanathen concluded softly.
Barry slowly took in his words and slumped against Xanathen’s scales, leaning his head against him. He placed his hand close to his own head as he gently rubbed against the scales. Xanathen’s eyes widened then lowered, keeping his gaze on Barry.
“You’re the first other being I’ve seen in over two hundred years.”
“Two hundred?!” Barry echoed in shock.
“Yes. My face makes me look younger than I am,” Xanathen chuckled, “I’m familiar enough with you humans to know that two hundred years is a very long time. My father was roughly as old as a millennium before he spread his wings one final time.”
“So...for dragons, you’re about...”
“I have recently reached adulthood.”
“Hey. Me too,” Barry replied with a sombre smirk. “W-Wait. So, you’re a dragon. You can fly! Why don’t you just...leave? Leave this island, find a new place with more dragons, or—”
“You really do have little understanding of dragons. This is my island. The island of my people. For me to go out and find a new home, I would need to find a place completely devoid of other dragons. Any intrusion is often seen as an act of war. While it’s true, I’m incredibly strong and fast...I know that I’m still growing. I wouldn’t stand a chance against an older dragon, especially more than one.”
“Oh...I see…,” Barry choked awkwardly, “I kinda understand the whole loneliness thing, though. I mean, before you correct me, I know it hasn’t been two hundred years, but...well, I can’t live that long. I mean I don’t think I can, but—”
“You have spent an entire month here by yourself,” Xanathen added.
“Yeah. Yeah, that’s uh...that’s a thing that happened. But can I tell you something?”
“I assure you, I have no one I could tell if I wanted to.”
“I felt alone before I got here. This just, I dunno, took it to the extreme.”
“What about all the people you say are in the states?”
“I mean, yeah, there are a lot of people there. A lot. But, y’know...and I know this sounds pissy-weak when compared to your problems, but it’s pretty lonely when you’re surrounded by a lot of people that don’t even really know you. I talked to people, sure. I had acquaintances I worked with. But we talked about work, maybe sports, or whatever. But being alone here, I dunno. Makes you think. I don’t know a damn thing about them. And they don’t know me. I’m just Barry, ace pilot of the Coast Guard. I like flying and I like sports. That’s all they know.
“And my parents, of course. I mean, I love them, sure. But I don’t think they’re happy with what I do…not because I’m happy with it. I think they like it because it looks good to have a brave, strong man flying out over the sea and saving people, and working with machines and all...” Barry trailed off quietly. “It always seems like I do more wrong than right. Everything I did wasn’t good enough for them, so I’d always get a lot of flack. I cried once because I twisted my ankle and heard, ‘get up, quit crying, be a man!’ Or, if I cut my hair differently, ‘What are ya, queer?’ Then they went and shaved my head. Hell, they still give me shit for being in the Coast Guard instead of the Army or something. So it’s the same thing…I don’t really know them, and they don’t really know me.
“There are things I miss about home. I miss the food, I miss having a warm place to stay. I miss my family. But being here, I just...I kinda realized I didn’t really have anyone back there.”
Barry sat quietly as he lay against the dragon’s thick hide, feeling almost weightless. He had never really said that much to anyone before in his life, nothing so personal. His feelings were always buried down deep, below layers of cockiness and machismo. With those thoughts out of him and released, he felt almost cleansed in a way.
“Sorry. I know that’s a lot of complaining. I just needed to get that off my chest,” he apologized, somewhat sheepishly.
“I don’t understand why you worry so much about what others think of you,” Xanathen confessed, quizzically.
“Because! If I’m not careful, they’d disown me and then I’d have no one at all. I don’t want to be totally alone.”
Barry leaned back further into Xanathen, staring at the walls around him. He was miles away from home, he had no idea how many, and the only person around was letting Barry use him like a recliner. He let his own words echo in his head as he continued to vent. He never thought he would say those words out loud, but as he said them he immediately acknowledged them as the truth. The liberation he felt at getting those feelings out was strong, but it were quickly replaced with nerves at what was to come. He was letting out so many words and feelings, would he say those words he feared most? He looked at Xanathen and his large golden eyes, feeling the most comfortable he had ever been in his life. Though dragon scales weren’t anything like a downy mattress and a warm blanket, he felt safe by Xanathen’s side. All the words he said were met with listening ears. Though Barry’s heart
wept for the dragon and his years of solitude, there were feelings of a deep connection with him as well. No one else had ever really understood what it felt like to be alone. Back home it felt like he was in the back of someone else’s head as they lived out their life. Despite how lonely he felt, there was the liberating thought of being able to be whoever he wanted to be, and not what he had to be. Still, did he really need to take that plunge? He curled up into himself as he shook his head in defense.
Xanathen stood up, letting Barry fall to the ground. His tail swung back and forth as he strode past the pillars and turned to Barry.
“Aren’t you coming?” he asked, authoritatively.
“Uh—where are we going?”
“I don’t want to be cooped up in this cave all day. I need to spread my wings,” he replied.
“In case you’ve forgotten, I don’t have wings,” Barry retorted, jogging behind him.
“I’m well aware.”
The two walked up to the mouth of the cave and looked out at the island below them. In full daylight, the view was spectacular. Barry saw all the different shades of blues and greens tracing across the pearly white shore in the distance. The world seemed so small from where they stood. The wispy gray clouds hung low and close to their heads. Barry felt tempted to reach out and touch this world for himself. He gasped in awe as he took in the view.
He looked down at the sharp drop below. There were no ledges or stairs. Just a steep incline with barely any places to grip. He gulped quietly as he thought of how he nearly stumbled off into the night. His foot kicked a pebble off the edge and he watched as it careened downwards until it couldn’t be seen anymore.
Xanathen spread his mighty wings, letting himself shine in the mild sunlight that crept past the overcast clouds. His slate scales dazzled as his wings expanded at least fifteen feet. The light shone through the skin of his wings as he stretched. Barry wrapped his arms around himself and bent over as Xanathen’s wings began to beat, blowing the wind around him at the dragon’s beck and call.The dragon launched himself from the edge diving down to the ground like a bullet, then gliding back up to the ledge with ease. He flew back and forth, skidding over the treetops and darting high, just because he could.
Barry chuckled as he watched. Seeing Xanathen fly reminded him of his own good times piloting the helicopter. How he would soar in all directions as fast as he could, and then ease back to enjoy the scenery. Sometimes he would dip low just to see the water push away from the downdraft, or tilt it just because he wanted to. He watched Xanathen and smiled. He was sure if he were a dragon, he’d be doing exactly the same thing. “Showboating asshole!” Barry cried out as Xanathen tore by again, his own blond hair blowing in the gust from the dragon’s wings. Xanathen flew back and landed on the ledge. Part of his brow rose slightly and the wild look on his face spread.
“Sorry, were you saying something? I couldn’t hear you over the winds created by my majestic wings!” Xanathen snarled haughtily.
“I was calling you a show-off!” Barry laughed.
“I would rather show off all my brilliance than keep it hidden. Modesty is for you mortals.”
“Not this mortal. If I could fly like that, I’d be flying circles around you.”
“Oh? Is that so?” Xanathen lowered himself. “Get on.”
“What?”
“You said you flew back home. Get on. Let’s see how well you can handle flight here.”
Xanathen lowered his wings to the ground with a dramatic flourish, like he was rolling out a carpet. He looked at Barry with a silent invitation, nodding towards his back. Barry gasped quietly as he examined the noble creature. An excited grin spread across his face as he climbed up and clung to the rough hide, pushing himself up onto the dragon’s back and sitting between two of the large spines that rippled down the backbone; he clung on tightly. Xanathen’s wings shot up and began to flap, lifting the enormous body from the ground and up into the air with each beat. After a final push against the ground, Xanathen was off and diving down in a spiral.
Barry grasped the long spines with all his might as the wind blew harshly against his face, tossing his hair about. He felt the familiar twisting and turning of a spiral and a nostalgic feeling swept over him. He could barely open his eyes against the intense force from the tailspin they were in, but still he managed to peek around him and watch the world swirl by as they fell through blurred streaks of different colors.
His stomach lurched with the sudden stop and the instantaneous incline as the wings extended out from Xanathen’s body. His eyes opened wide as they glided over the treetops of the forest, leaving a wake of torn leaves behind them. The island tore by them faster than anything he had ever felt piloting the helicopters back home. They picked up altitude and ascended higher. The only thing Barry could hear was the beating of wings and the sound of air passing by at near-sonic speeds.
They shot high above the treetops and all the land formations. In a few short seconds, even the looming mountaintop seemed far below them. Xanathen’s wings beat in place, holding them there for a moment. The chilly air blew against Barry, sending shivers across his body. With each dip and curve of their flight, the more his training came back to him. Every little thing about steering and the wind conditions all came back to him as if he was still home. Barry looked down on the island as he gripped onto the hard spine. It looked like he could fit the whole island in between his fingers from this height. He breathed in awe, watching as a cool puff of breath escaped from his flared nostrils.
“I’m impressed!” Xanathen boomed, “Still think you’ve got it in you?”
“I can take whatever you can give me!” Barry laughed back, wrapping both his arms and legs around the spine in anticipation.
Xanathen dropped low and brought himself to a graceful glide again as he tilted to the left and right, skidding against the mountainside. As he continued to fly, the more adventurous his flying became. He picked up speed and tore against the air in front of him. He dove towards the ocean at breakneck speed and tilted his body. The sparkling blue water dazzled even more at their pace, every drop of it rushing past them. Xanathen turned and let his wing skid across the surface and playfully fan out into two parts. One sprayed outwards back into the ocean, while the other half went inwards and doused Barry with water.
“Hey!” Barry shouted as he spat out water, his drenched golden hair masking his eyes. Even over the sounds of their careening across the water, Barry could still hear Xanathen chuckling.
They tore across the ocean, nimbly dodging the large rocks that pierced through the dark cobalt surface. Barry, while still clinging to the spine, adjusted his body carefully and moved himself to the other side while they flew. He twisted himself around until his back was firmly pressed to the spine and his view overlooked Xanathen’s head. He slowly rose to his feet and let the pressure of the wind secure him against the spine, extending his arms out, mirroring Xanathen’s wings that now kept them in flight. Barry’s hair streaked out behind him, tossing and twirling freely. As the world raced past them, the sea foam spraying away, he took a deep breath as he absorbed it all. Each thing he passed on the back of this dragon brought his elation higher, filling him with a shiny new feeling of liberation. He was the bravest man he knew, and as he stood on the back of this dragon, he knew he felt the embodiment of freedom. While they traveled through the clouds and over the land, all the worries of the world tumbled off his shoulders and fell behind him deep into the sea, where no one could find them again. He was no longer Barry, man of the land’s rule, but rather a zephyr that streaked across the mountain tops and teased the droplets of the sea below him. The laws of the world he once knew were far behind him. The world he was concerned with was the one flashing by so quickly as he rode on top of the dragon.
Xanathen’s body began to tilt again as he rose off the waterfront and higher into the sky. Barry, no longer holding onto the spine, felt himself shaking and losing his footing as Xanathen began to veer to t
he side. Nothing was underneath him anymore and he felt himself tossed off and falling toward the water. The world began to slow down as he came closer to the surface. He remembered the words of one of his instructors from years past, “The higher and faster you fall, the more hitting the water feels like cement.”
Ah, shit, Barry thought to himself solemnly as he braced himself, dedicating himself to his last words. He was hit hard with a crushing sensation, but as blue as it was, it certainly wasn’t water. He wasn’t sinking, but instead rising. He looked down to a pair of glossy golden eyes looking right back up at him. His legs straddled uncomfortably across the dragon’s wide head and his chest lay limply on top of his brow. Xanathen roared loudly, keeping a steady eye on Barry while he changed course for the mountaintop. He lowered his head as they reached the ledge, letting Barry roll off onto the ground.
“I feel like I have to keep my eye on you at all times, otherwise you end up in trouble,” Xanathen scoffed.
“Sorry. It was just...fun,” he replied meekly.
“It was fun. I haven’t flown with someone else for many years. Still, that was impressive. Maybe next time you’ll hold on longer,” Xanathen replied, as he slinked back into his cave.
I wouldn’t mind holding you again, Barry thought to himself as he watched Xanathen, his heart pounding faster. He caught himself abruptly in a panic. Was this what liberation was going to lead to? As Barry walked in behind the dragon, he thought to himself curiously that if it had felt so right in the air, maybe it was the winds of fate that blew him here to make himself free once and for all? He contemplated that quietly as he followed behind, wondering if it was himself cracking out of his shell, or just the pulsing rush of adrenaline flowing through him. He felt, at the very least, that he deserved a vacation from home, or at least from his old self. Permanently perhaps.
Chapter 5
Xanathen carried Barry into the cave, on the swell of his back, with very little effort. Illuminated by the pale blue glow, the two had plenty of light as they made their way deeper into the cavern. Barry clung gently to the large dragon’s back and he swayed back and forth as Xanathen walked. Sand clung to his warm body, and to his hair. He was in an excited yet trance like state as they moved deeper into the cave. Throughout the flight back up there, he could only think of the passionate kiss they had just shared on the beach. His mind was still frozen in that moment, the waves crashing against the shore nearby and Xanathen’s powerful body held on top of his as they mashed their lips together. The more he thought about it, the deeper into a dream-like state he went. A simple smile curled across his face as it flushed to a deepening scarlet. He had never felt something so entirely right in his life. He had kissed before but never had it rocked his body to the core. He felt lighter than the breeze as he laid his head on Xanathen’s side. While his heart felt satisfied with the evening, he felt an ache coursing through his body that was screaming for more. His groin tingled with hot anticipation as his lover’s hide continued to press against it and his mind kept going back to Xanathen’s warm tongue sliding against his own and the intense look in his eyes as he looked down at him on the sand.