I found him in his room and when I realized he’d been up working every moment for the last several hours, I respected him even more. He was a little tired looking, with tousled hair and blood shot eyes. It was apparent he was a good man.
“Did you find anything?” I asked.
“The ransom note is as clean as a whistle. I made Sullivan and Elizabeth give me a fingerprint reading. Besides ours, there are no other prints. I’m still trying to determine how it got in with the mail.”
“I can’t take this anymore,” I said, pacing in his room. He’d laid out an impressive amount of computer equipment, and even though I didn’t know what I was looking at, it was clear Riot and his men were professionals. “I need to go out searching myself.”
Riot nodded slowly, contemplating my words.
“I won’t stop you. But I think we should talk about how it would really go down. So, I will remind you again that you’re the most recognizable face on the island. I think if you step one foot out of this castle, you’ll be inundated with crowds of people wanting to have a word with you and get close to you, begging for autographs or pictures with you.”
“That’s what happens every time I leave,” I said. “But so be it! I will tell everyone what I’m doing and they’ll get out of my way!”
“Perhaps. Whoever it is that Willa is with, they’re banking on you keeping things a secret. They think they’re going to exchange Willa for a bunch of money and go on with their life. If they see that you’re out actively searching, and getting the police involved, they may panic. If they panic, they could —.”
“I get it! Stop!”
“I just think it’s important we think of every possibility before acting.”
I weighed the possibilities he’d laid out and of course, he was right. It didn’t make me feel any better.
“This isn’t going fast enough!” I said. “I need Willa home now!”
“I feel like we’re getting close, Sir,” he said. He showed me a piece of paper with a list of addresses written on it. “This is the list of people who own white vans on the island. I’m putting the ransom note to the side for now. We have to just wait for whoever wrote it to contact you. It’s important you stay near the phone and I’m going to show you how to record any phone conversations you have. My men and I are going to visit all of these addresses first thing in the morning and I’m confident we’re going to find her real soon. Just hang in there. I know it’s hard.”
“You keep using that word,” I replied.
“And I know every time that it is completely insufficient in describing what you’re going through.”
I took a deep breath, trying to release some of the tension in my body.
“Very well then,” I said. “I’ll be in my study.”
“I’ll check in before I leave in the morning.”
“Thank you,” I said, nodding before leaving his room. The liquor was waiting for me in my study and I realized while it may have been a poor substitute, the booze was the only friend I really had. I could have used a friend right then.
I could have used a wife, if I’m being honest.
I missed Poppy fiercely. Before heading to my study, I walked out into her garden for a moment to visit her statue. The moon was full, throwing soft rays of moonlight over the roses I’d planted for her — full, lush, pink blooms that were so fragrant there were times I swore I could smell them on the breeze when I was on the terrace outside our bedroom. I liked to imagine she was responsible for that, a little gift to let me know she was thinking about me, wherever she was.
Raising the girls without her had been harder than I imagined, and I now hated the fact that I’d been so hands-off with them. I’d allowed the staff to do most of the work, while I wallowed in my misery. Half of me believed Clara and Elizabeth would do a better job than I would have anyway. It’s not like I knew what I was doing in the first place. Add the trauma of losing their mother and everything that came after and I was completely clueless as to their true needs. I thought taking myself out of the equation would be the best for them, as if I’d screw something up.
I couldn’t even step out of the picture correctly, apparently.
I struggled to think of what had gone wrong with Willa. Had we babied her too much? Should we have made her do more herself? What did we miss?
Whatever I did wrong, I never meant to cause them harm.
I picked a rose, brought it to my nose and inhaled it’s sweet scent. I looked up at my Poppy, my eyes searching the hers.
“Help me, Poppy. I need you,” I whispered, my eyes welling up with tears.
Chapter 27
STRYKER
It had been one hell of a long night.
I was usually a hard sleeper, but I was plagued with insomnia, lying awake and thinking about Clara all night. I was thankful to have actual work to do this morning, so I could get away from the castle and try to stop thinking about her.
We all piled into Joe’s Escalade and headed out to the first address on Riot’s list.
“Alright, keep your eyes out in the vicinity for a white van with a dented front passenger door,” he said, as he pulled up to a modest, well-kept home in a busy neighborhood.
“There’s a van in the driveway,” Wreck noted.
“Let’s get a look at it,” Slade said, hoping out. We followed him and gathered around the van.
“No dent,” Riot said. “Rules this one out.”
We turned to head back to our vehicle, but the front door of the house opened and a man walked out, an angry scowl on his face.
“Why are you assholes on my property?” he asked.
“None of your business,” Slade said. “Get back in your house.”
“Jesus, dude, a little tact,” Riot hissed, shaking his head.
“He called us assholes!” Slade protested.
Riot began to speak a little more politely to the guy, but the damage was already done. Slade had his feathers ruffled, as did the man.
“I’d say it’s my business, asshole,” the man replied directly to Slade.
“Look, man, this is all a mistake,” Riot said. “We thought this van belonged to another friend of ours. Sorry to bother you.”
“Well, you people need to learn some manners. You aren’t from around here are you?” He growled, looking us up and down.
“What’s it to you?” Slade said, sneering at him.
“Get in the fucking car,” Riot said, looking like he was going to kill him.
Slade flashed the guy his signature crooked smile with a hearty flip of his middle finger before walking away.
As soon as we were all in, Riot laid into him.
“Dude, what the actual fuck? We’re here to quietly solve this case. We aren’t here to make waves. You don’t think these people are going to notice us already? Being a prick isn’t going to help and certainly isn’t going to help us blend in.”
“Dudes like us can’t blend in anywhere and you know it. And what am I supposed to do when someone disrespects us like that, for fuck’s sake?”
“I’m just saying keep your attitude in check, understood?”
“Whatever. Dude was a dick, though.”
“He was a dick because we were on his property. How about you just let me handle talking to people?”
“That’s cool, I’m better at punching them myself.”
“Fine, when I need someone fucked up, I’ll let you know.”
“Deal,” he said, putting on his seat belt. “Where are we going next?”
Riot rolled his eyes and Wreck laughed, shaking his head.
These guys cracked me up. The dynamic between Riot and Slade was fucking weird. They were like brothers who were almost always bickering, but the love between them was obvious.
They would have gone through fire for each other.
Everyone needed someone like that in their lives.
Now that my folks had both passed, my old man not long after my mom, there wasn’t anyone beside
s the other Gods that I shared that kind of love with. They’d become my family now.
I still couldn’t help but feel like something was missing, though.
Clara’s face flashed in my mind.
Was she the missing piece?
If I was going to find out the answer to that question, I was going to have to kiss her first. And kissing her probably wasn’t appropriate, at least not until we’d found Willa and returned her safely back home.
“I hope we find this girl today,” I said.
“Me, too,” Riot agreed.
They didn’t need to know I had my own personal reasons.
“I gotta admit, though, I’m getting a little worried. A lot of time has passed. She could be anywhere by now. We’ve never failed before, but this is starting to feel like something is off. I’m just not sure.”
“Dude, that’s just it. You’ve never failed before. You won’t fail now.”
“Riot, you’re the man, and we’re the shit. We’ll turn every rock upside down if we have to,” Slade said.
“Yeah, man, we’re gonna find her, don’t worry,” Wreck said.
Riot nodded, taking a deep breath, as he pulled out into traffic again.
“I hope you’re right. Because if we don’t, I’m pretty sure Joe is gonna kill us with his bare hands.”
“Nah, man, he’s got a lion for that,” Slade said.
“A lion?” Riot asked.
“Dude, don’t ask. But just don’t go into the fucking basement of that damned castle, alright? Trust me on this.”
“I don’t want to know what happened, do I?” Riot asked.
“All you need to know is it involves my sweet ol’ lady’s pussy, and another very large, very hungry pussy that is not nearly as friendly as Diana’s.”
We burst out laughing. Slade was known for getting himself into unusual situations and I could just picture him facing off with a fucking lion.
“You’re absolutely crazy, do you know that?” Riot asked him.
“What’s fucking crazy is keeping a pet lion! I’m not sure that old King Joe is playing with a full deck himself.”
“When you’re the king it probably doesn’t matter,” I said.
“You’re probably right about that, Stryker,” Slade replied. “By the way, what’s going on with you and Clara? I saw the way you were looking at her.”
“I have no idea what you’re talking about.”
“Sure, dude, whatever,” he laughed.
I turned away and looked out the window, not wanting them to see the look in my eye, knowing full well my thoughts about Clara were splayed out nakedly across my face.
And those thoughts definitely included Clara splayed out naked.
Chapter 28
WILLA
“Where are we going tonight?” I asked Dragon.
He’d been a little quiet today and it was making me nervous. He’d slept most of the day away. I spent the time he was asleep exploring the area near the lighthouse.
The lighthouse was beautiful and secluded, perched on a cliff, looking out over the ocean. I sat on the edge of the cliff, staring down at the crashing waves below and out at the horizon, wondering if there was a world out there that I belonged in.
I allowed myself to dream, to imagine being someone else, living another girl’s life. Would I have a career? A family? Would I be a world traveler?
Our father had taken us on a trip to Paris once, when we were very young, and I had vague memories of how busy and old the city was. I would love to go back there. Visit the museums, just stroll around like a normal person.
There were so many places I wanted to visit. I longed to go to Japan and eat sushi every day. Or, eat pasta and cannoli in Italy. I’d mentioned these things to my father so many times, but his response was to have Addy make spaghetti and cannolis for us — a poor substitute for traveling.
Despite my dreams of escaping this island, I still missed my family.
Clara, Elizabeth, Addy, my father, Eva. I missed Eva most of all and I knew she had to be so upset now. She must feel so betrayed. We did everything together. And here, I’d gone off and left without a word.
“It’s a surprise,” Dragon replied, as he drove us into the center of town. It still felt strange to be out in public. My father had made such a big deal about us not going out amongst the crowds of people. He never really said what we should be afraid of, just that they wouldn’t leave us be if we did. After years of begging for normalcy, after a while Eva and I just stopped asking altogether and accepted our fate.
Well, no more of that.
Even if I did go back, I told myself I’d never allow him to isolate us like that again. Now that I had a taste of real life, as weird as all of this was, I wasn’t going back to the way it used to be — not ever.
Dragon circled around a park in the center of the main shopping district and found a parking spot a block away.
“More shopping?” I asked.
“Nope, I want to show you something,” he said, grabbing my hand and leading me back to the park. Filled with people of all ages, I couldn’t help but smile as we passed by the families playing frisbee, the young couples having picnics, and the children dancing around in the fountain on the edge. I watched the mothers, observing their children closely, with loving smiles on their faces, and the pain I felt at all I’d missed out on washed over me.
Dragon led me through the park, oblivious to the pain I was feeling. His hand held mine tightly, as if he was afraid I’d run away at any second, and to be honest, the urge to do just that was getting stronger and stronger. I had no idea where to go but all of this normalcy just reminded me of everything I never had and it just hurt. It didn’t feel good to be in it anymore. I was overwhelmed and plagued by increasing feelings of guilt at what I was doing to my family.
He stopped in front of a statue of two little girls and for a moment, I didn’t know exactly what I was looking at.
“Well?” he asked, gesturing to it.
“What?” I asked, looking closer. Then I saw the plaque on the ground in front of it.
“Princess Willamina and Princess Evangeline, beloved Princesses of Lilivania.”
My eyes shot back up and I now recognized what I was looking at. They’d memorialized a scene I’d hoped to never really see again, and confusion clouded my thoughts.
“Why…why would anyone do this?” I muttered.
It was a recreation of a famous photograph from when we were six. Eva and I had just gotten out of the car after having been abducted, and were holding hands and running back to our father’s arms for the first time.
I remembered it clearly, but I also remembered all of the moments that came before, I remembered the pain and terror we felt. Why in the world someone would commemorate this awful, painful moment in stone was beyond my comprehension.
“You don’t like it?” Dragon asked, clearly confused.
“It’s appalling,” I replied, tears filling my eyes.
The past came rushing back, a nightmare that I tried to forget every waking moment. I stared into that little girl’s face, and all I could see was the painful trauma she’d just gone through.
“Stop stalling and get in here!” The deep baritone of the monster’s voice shook the walls around us. Eva and I huddled together in the corner, and once again, as I’d already done a few times before, I pushed Eva down and stood back up.
“Don’t leave me!” she cried.
“I have to! You’ll be safe here!” I hissed, pulling away from her grasp. It took a few seconds for her to understand that she really needed to let me go.
I didn’t need words to tell her I didn’t want to go.
But somehow, since I was always the one in charge, I was also the one wordlessly chosen to endure what was waiting in the darkness. It didn’t matter. I would never have let him near her. I didn’t care what I had to do.
We’d been there three days by then.
I’d kept track by the sunlight that disap
peared each night outside the window I couldn’t reach. And just like each night before, the voice called out and one of us was expected to walk through the door.
I’d learned the hard way the first night that resisting was futile.
After that, I made sure to keep Eva from going through that door. Once my tears had dried up after that first night, something hardened inside of me. I lost something that I hadn’t even realized was there until it was gone.
The flame of hope flickered and sputtered as the sunlight faded, and when the now-familiar voice cut through the air, I knew that I’d endure it once more. I looked over my shoulder at Eva before I walked in, the courage to go on spurred by the fact that what I was doing was keeping her safe.
“Now!” The voice shouted again, laced with evil.
Steeling myself, I walked into the darkness, retreating deep into another world in my mind, a world where nobody could touch me.
“You again, eh?” He growled, hungry fingers clawing out of the darkness.
I closed my eyes and melted away.
“My very own blood princess. All mine!” He shouted. “Mine!”
I shuddered in pain, a door shut inside of me…
A tear in time. A break in my soul.
A wicked wildfire that left scars only I could see.
By the time the police burst through the door to rescue us, the damage was already done.
“Willa!” Dragon whispered, snapping me out of the past and back into the park. I turned away from the statues, walking quickly back the way we came. “Where are you going?”
“I want to get out of here,” I said over my shoulder.
“What the hell is wrong with you?” I was walking fast, almost running, and he jogged behind me trying to catch up.
“Can we please just go somewhere else?” I pleaded.
“Sure, of course,” he muttered. “Sorry, I thought you’d want to see that. It’s been there a really long time.”
“Whatever,” I said, shaking my head. “It’s stupid.”
Not exactly the best choice of words for what it really was, but I didn’t want to take the time to explain what I was going through.
BLOOD PRINCESS: GODS OF CHAOS MC (BOOK 17) Page 9