by RaeLynn Fry
“Things have been tense here in the Outer City. More so than normal. Our efforts at trying to get people together to start a rebellion are being met with fear and defensiveness.”
“That would make sense, Karis. Your people aren't used to taking a stand for themselves. This would be a big risk for them.”
“Exactly, and in order to take that risk, some people are asking for proof that will make the fight worth it for them. Ethan thinks it's his responsibility to give them this proof.”
Papa comes over and hands me a cup of steaming tea. He presses one into Ella's hands as well, his fingers brushing hers. She looks up at him with warm eyes and an inviting smile. I look at Papa. He smiles back, almost shyly, and goes back to the kitchen for his own cup of tea. I've never seen him look like this, almost like a little boy. I look back at Ella, my eyes narrowed. She smiles at me over the top of her cup, like nothing is weird. Mentally, I give myself a shake. This isn’t what’s important right now.
“What kind of proof were they asking for? What could Ethan possibly give them?”
“That's what I told him, but he said that if we expected them to follow him, he had to do what he could.”
Things start clicking for Ella. I can see it in her straightened posture and the tight fingers that are gripping her cup. “Where did Ethan go to get this proof? If he went back into Dahn, I’m going to skin him alive.”
“The Further.”
Ella sighs and sets her cup down on the small table next to her. “Ethan Hughes,” she says under her breath, “what am I going to do with you?” She doesn’t react the way I imagined her to. She doesn’t seem scared or angry, more resigned to the fact that he’s chosen not to listen to her, and that this time it’s going to cost more than the last.
“Earlier, you said you weren't worried about Ethan being out in the Further. What did you mean by that?”
“I'm always worried about citizens going out into the Further. But the Further isn't what the Corporation would have you believe. Yes, it's deadly and there are Untouchables, no resources, and other dangers, but those aren't the most hazardous things Ethan and Dhevan could run into.”
“There are things more dangerous than what you just listed?” Journey's eyes widen and her voice struggles to remain steady. I reach over and squeeze her hand. Her fingers are cold.
“Potentially, yes. Akin has been sending out small parties into the Further. Sometimes they come back, sometimes they don't. The Corp has camps set up out into the Further. Stations for exploring parties to re-supply. There are nomadic bands of Untouchables that have been attacking the groups that have been going out, lately.”
“Exploring parties?” Déjà says. “What do you mean? What are they exploring?”
“The Further. Akin has been looking to extend his reach, and this is how he's doing it. They're going out and searching the Further, setting up small self—sufficient camps along the way. If they come across another settlement, they take it over, if they can. He has an interest in the space beyond our walls. And a fear of it.”
“Back up,” I say. “Other settlements?”
Ella nods her head. “We're not the only ones out here.”
The rest of us exchange looks, all of us thinking about the same thing—Adami.
“What is it? What are you all debating on whether to tell me or not?”
I let myself smile. I’ve missed Ella's uncanny ability to know what is going on around her with the smallest amount of clues.
Papa clears his throat. “A few days or so before Ethan and Karis came back, an Untouchable came into the city.”
Ella's eyes go wide, but her voice stays even. “He just walked straight into the city?”
“Not exactly,” Papa says.
“Dhevan was out working in the fields early one morning,” Déjà says. “He's always there before anyone else—and saw something out in the distance, headed for his fields. He met the Untouchable and quickly hid him away, bringing him here.”
“That was very dangerous.” Ella doesn’t sound condemning in anyway, but rather impressed with what she’s finding here in Neech.
“The potential significance of what this meant for us outweighed the danger.”
“Have you been able to talk to the Untouchable at all?”
Papa puts a soft hand on her arm and she sits back, looking at him expectantly. “He said only one thing, it does exist. Then he lost consciousness. He only woke up last night.”
“Where is he now? Do you mind if I examine him?”
Papa looks over at Eta who nods. He looks to Déjà, next. He tightens his jaw and jerks his chin down once. Finally, Papa looks at me. I give a shrug. I don't see the harm in her examining.
“He's upstairs,” Papa finally says, “but if he's sleeping, it will have to wait. He’s been through a lot.”
Ella looks excited. “Of course,” she says with an enthusiastic nod.
I enter the room first, making sure I get the spot nearest the bed. I have this weird sense of protectiveness and ownership towards Adami.
The light from the bedside table is on and a yellow glow spills out of the doorway and into the hall. “I was beginning to feel like an exile up here while you all were downstairs, having a good time.”
I smile and hand him a glass of water. He struggles a bit to sit up and takes it from me.
“You look remarkably well, considering your journey and everything you've been through,” Ella says, patting his knee.
“Well, I've been taken really good care of since I got here, so I guess it's no surprise. Even got a shave and haircut.” He gives me a warm smile and I duck my head a little. He chuckles and runs his hands through his shorn locks.
“Mind if I check you out? Take some vitals?”
“Not at all.”
“My bag is over in the corner from earlier,” Eta says.
“Karis was in charge of looking after him,” Papa says. “Feeding and cleaning him up as best we could.”
“Well done, Karis,” Ella says. “He looks to be in great condition.” She sits on the edge of the bed with Eta's medical bag and starts a routine of checking vitals.
When she’s finished, Papa says. “It's late, and I now you’d like to talk to him, but I think we should let him get some rest. I'd offer you a room here, Ella, but there's not a bed for you.”
“She can stay with me,” Eta says. “Now that Ethan's gone, I have a spare room again.” She says it so casually. As if it's an everyday matter. My heart tightens just a little
“Ella,” I say as she heads out the door.
She turns around. “Yes, dear?”
“How did you find your way through Neech and not get lost?” Our city is a maze of slums and streets, alleys and hodgepodge buildings. If you haven’t grown up here, it’s easy to get lost. Everything looks the same to an outsider. “You've never been to the Outer City before, have you?”
“No, I haven't. But Ethan had told me what to look for when I got here, so it wasn't that hard.”
“Ethan told you?” I pinch my brows together.
I skim though my mind and think of when Ethan would have had the opportunity to tell Ella how to find us. He didn't know, himself, until we were escaping from Dahn; and as far as I know, he never made it back into the Inner City.
The answer pushes up through my mind like a spring plant pushing through the soil, slow, but strong. He had to have known where I lived before he came back here with me. This means, he knew me before I ever met him the night of Ajna’s Jatis. I try to rationalize it by thinking that maybe, in his rounds of delivering the newsletter, he found me. But I quickly discard that. The odds of that are slim. He did his deliveries before I ever was out on the street for work.
Why was he watching me? And how could I never have noticed? Another unsettling thought grows next to the first one—was it really by accident that I saw him at the Jatis? That I ran into him on my first day in Dahn? That he’s here with me, now? My defenses rise.
&n
bsp; “How did Ethan get you that information?” I ask. “He never got back into Dahn after we left, it was too dangerous.”
Ella’s smile tightens ever so subtly and her warm brown eyes hold a bit of worry to them. There's a struggle playing out across her features, I can read her like a book. She's debating on how much to tell me. “It sounds like you two haven't had time to talk about things.”
“What sort of things?”
“Things he told me he wanted to talk to you about. Important things.”
“No, he hasn't. We haven't. It's been busy; it must have slipped his mind. But you're here now, you can fill me in.” It’s worth a try.
She shifts her weight on the couch. “I can't. I really wish you two would have had time to talk.” She slips out of the room.
Ethan
We’ve been walking for a day, resting only a few times, but it feels like we’ve been walking for weeks. I feel Dhevan looking at me from the corner of his eye. I try to ignore him for as long as I can, focusing on everything but him. Like the way Raj sort of stoops forward and drags his left foot a little when he walks. Or how small clouds of dust rise up with each step we take. I practice putting a bit more pressure into each footfall, seeing how big I can make my dust clouds. They could easily swallow Dhevan’s, I think.
“What are you doing here, Ethan?” I can tell from the tone of his voice that he knows I’m trying to avoid him.
“Um, trudging through the Further with two people who aren’t my favorites.”
“No, I mean, in Neech. You're from Dahn. What are you doing here, with us? With Karis?”
It's somewhat of an offensive question. Even for Dhevan. “I want to help you. I want to stop my father, the Corporation. And I love Karis.”
Raj snorts. I flash him a look making it clear he’d better keep his mouth shut.
“Karis might as well be my sister.”
That’s it. That’s all he says. I mentally role my eyes. Dhevan’s a good guy. I like him well enough, but…well…he’s Dhevan.
“Okay…?” I say.
“And Journey may look sweet as a ripe peach and as innocent as a daisy, but she has got a protective side to her that’s as fierce as any momma dog guarding her pups.”
Oh. Now I see where this is going. I stand a little taller, not focusing so much on the clouds of dust at my feet. I settle in for what I've been preparing myself for. The father-daughter talk.
“Although I appreciate your use of color with the description of your Pair in this drab and desolate wasteland we’re currently trudging across, I need you to bottom line it.”
“What are your intentions with Karis?”
“My intentions?” Is this guy for real? “I intend to spend as much time as possible with her when we get back. I intend to be Paired with her. I intend to grow old with her.”
“Are you sure about that?” Raj says.
“Do you have something substantial to say?” I bite out, hands fisted around the straps of my pack. “Because if you do, make sure you weigh heavily what it is; we don’t need you out here as much as you’d like to think we do.”
As soon as I say the words, I realize it’s true. I have the map. We could get rid of him and all the problems he brings with him, once and for all. But is that really who I am? The sort of person who will do anything in order to keep a secret? No, that’s who Akin is.
Raj smiles with a satisfied look in his eye and keeps walking.
Dhevan continues as if Raj hadn’t said anything. He’s doing a better job than I am of ignoring the unwanted guest. “And Karis feels the same way?”
I humor him because Karis is so close to him and I know all he’s trying to do is protect her. If I’d had a sister, I’d be doing the exact same thing. Except I’d be better at it. But, I can’t hold it against him that he thinks himself more than he is. “Yes, Dhevan. She does. We talked about it at length when we came back from Dahn.”
“Kavin was a great guy, you know.”
“So I keep hearing.”
“Like a brother.”
I shift my weight a little. I wasn't expecting this angle.
“He was a good guy, the best—loyal and funny and kind and selfless and honorable. He was my best friend. We all grew up together, Karis, Kavin, Journey, and me. We know each other as well as we know ourselves. We were a family. And most importantly, Kavin loved Karis more than anything in this world. He would have done anything for her. You didn't grow up with us. You don't know Karis the way that Kavin did.”
“Look, I get it,” I say. And I really do. “Kavin meant a lot to you. And so does Karis. In your mind, no one can be as good for Karis as Kavin was, no one could love her as much or as well as he did. But I promise you, I love her with every ounce of my being. And I promise to love her to the best of my ability for the rest of my life. But the only one I have to prove that to, is Karis.”
“But will that be good enough?”
“What's your deal? Why don't you like me? I've done nothing but try to help you and the people of Neech for pretty much my entire life.”
“You're an outsider and you don't belong here. You're not made for the Outer City.”
And there it is. My inner most fears voiced by someone I thought could be a potential ally.
“I know I grew up in the Inner City, but I don't know how else I can convince you that that's not who I am. That I'm doing everything in my power to—”
“It really did a number on Karis when Kavin was Released.”
“So I have a high bar set before me, is that it?” This conversation is all over the place.
“Yes. And no. What I’m trying to get at is that you need to respect the fact that he was here and a big part of all of our lives. A big part of Karis’ life. Just because he’s gone doesn’t mean he’s not still here. Don’t try to take his place or make Karis forget him. You’re not Kavin. Never can be.”
“That’s not what I’m—”
“Do you really believe his lies?” Raj says, spinning on us, disgust dripping from his face.
“Shut it, Raj. We had a deal.”
“That was back in Neech, we’re out in the Further now. It doesn’t matter if I break the deal or not. You can’t do anything to me, I’m your only option out here.”
I grind my teeth and continue to keep the map to myself. I’ll let him know I have it, that he has no power, when the time is right.
“You two need to grow up and stop fighting. I’m not going to put up with this for the entire trip.” Dhevan’s square build is about ten paces in front of us. A fast one. He doesn’t want to slow down unless he has to.
“You think I’m the only one that the Corporation sent into Neech to find a certain person? I’m not.”
Dhevan walks taller. “What’s that supposed to mean?”
I really dislike Raj.
“Ask Ethan. Although, he may not be as happy answering the question as I would be.”
“What's he talking about, Ethan?” Dhevan turns around and grabs my shoulders, stopping me with a jerk.
“Get your hands off me.” I roll my shoulders and knock his hands down. “Raj likes to run his mouth, or haven't you been paying attention? He likes to see how much trouble he can stir up.”
“He wouldn't have said it unless there was something to it.”
“The Farmer’s right, you know,” Raj says in a lilting voice.
That man had not plan on closing his eyes at any time during this trip, because I'll be there when he does, waiting. “The Corporation didn't send me out into the Further. I made this extremely dumb decision myself. Including coming with you two.” I walk away. This is wasting time.
“They may not have sent you to the Further, but they sent you into Neech.”
“I knew you were no good! Son of a—” Dhevan spins around again and grabs my shoulders.
“Look, Dhevan—”
A meaty fist stops my words. Pain explodes across my face. He has a wicked right cross that surprises the hell ou
t of me. I drop to the ground, Raj's laugh in the background. “What the hell was that for?” I jump up, my hand pressed to my already swelling cheek. “And you, shut up!” I direct at Raj.
Dhevan comes towards me again. I back up and go to the side to avoid him. I will not fight him, if I can help it. “I knew there was another reason for you coming to Neech!”
“I came because I care about Neech, and Karis!” I say.
“But what prompted those feelings?” Raj says.
“Shut it, Raj! He’s trying to cause division. Can't you see that, Dhevan?”
“I don't care about his motives, I care about the truth of what he's saying.” He swings at me again, but I duck and use the swing of his balance to strike. I rush forward and slam my shoulder into his stomach, knocking the air out of him. He stumbles back and runs into Raj. I let go and give an extra shove, both of them hitting the ground hard. “I'll tell you the truth, but you have got to stop taking swings at me!”
“Get off! Get off!” Raj yells from beneath Dhevan's massive form.
Dhevan rises to his feet, glaring at me with a level of hatred I've never seen before. “Start talking. Raj, tell me if he leaves anything out.”
७
Where does one even start with this sort of confession?
I take a breath. “I want you to know I love Karis. Regardless of what initially led me to Neech, I am on your side and I would die for her.”
“Just talk,” Dhevan says.
“I came across some papers in my father's office one day. I was used to seeing reports on Neech and about particular citizens, but this day was different. I came across an entire file dedicated to one person. To Karis.”
“Your father has a file on Karis?” Dhevan sounds dangerous. “What's in it?”
“Everything you can think of. Her family, her Caste, that her mom wasn't in the picture, where Karis lived, who her friends were. But then things got weird. There were medical records. Blood work ups, DNA analyses, personality profiles. It's like they were trying to get into the most finite part of her, trying to find out what made her tick.”