“I just…” My mind’s foggy. I should apologize. Or shut up. But like I told him, I’m not smart. “I want to have a life outside of work. I want you around.”
Do I really mean that? Is it a fever talking? Do I have a fever? I think I’m shivering. My body is too numbed up for me to know what’s going on.
“Do you? Or do you want your own personal doctor who will stitch you up in the privacy of your own home? I really shouldn’t have done this.” He stares at his bloodied gloves in his lap.
“Dean, I—”
“You’re out of it. I get it. You might not even remember this conversation—”
“Dean, I don’t want to use you. I won’t call you again. I mean I will, but it won’t be when I’m in trouble. It’ll be when I want someone to watch the game with. Or to go to the movies with. Or to maybe share my chocolate dessert. Maybe. That might be asking too much.”
“You were an only child, weren’t you?”
“Why do you ask that?” I’m confused. This conversation is weird.
“Because of your inability to share.”
“I can share,” I protest.
My mind is kinda foggy, and I’m not sure if I’m babbling. Am I? Am I oversharing? No. He just said I don’t share. It’s not like I can share this. It would blow his mind and not in a good way. In a terrible, devastating, awful way. I mean, there’s just no good way to break the news that werewolves are real. Or that vamps are. Then again, the cops know about vamps. They can handle it. But Dean’s a part of the public. The public can’t know.
But if they don’t know, they can’t defend themselves. They’ll be overwhelmed by a threat they can’t possibly defend against. Then again, we’re supposed to protect them.
On the other hand, right now, I’m not gonna be protecting anyone…
Dean is just eyeing me skeptically.
I push aside my wandering thoughts and try to focus on him and our conversation. “I can share,” I repeat. “When I want to.”
He shakes his head and removes his gloves. “I left you medicine and written instructions. Get some rest as you can. Drink plenty of fluids. Try to eat some, but if you can’t keep anything down, stick to water. You need to stay hydrated.”
“Yes, doctor.”
“I should be getting back to my place. Today was a shorter shift, but tomorrow, I’m working longer hours and—“
“You don’t need to give me your reasons. You can go. Just lock up behind you, please.”
His smile is weak, and I can tell he’s hurting. I hurt him. I never should’ve said anything, but maybe this is for the best. Maybe I should just break things off now. It would be the smart thing to do. That way vamps and wolves and whatever else can’t use anyone against me.
But I’m sick of being alone, and he does make me smile.
So we can be friends.
“Yes, we can.” He kisses my forehead.
Whoops. I didn’t realize I said that out loud.
But he agrees, and then he’s gone.
I’m alone. Always alone. Isolated. Forgotten.
If I die, the world will spin on.
I’m not okay with that.
Not yet at least.
Chapter 21
Almost two minutes later, I swear, I open my eyes. It’s actually fifteen hours later.
I groan.
“Past time for medicine it looks like.” Diego has brought over my chair from the table. He shakes a medicine bottle and takes out two pills. “Open,” he instructs.
With a grimace, I comply. The swallow of water to choke them down makes me cough. My stomach churns, but I manage to keep it down.
“Are you all right?”
I lift my eyebrows. “You’re not going to ask me what happened?”
Vaguely, I recall him asking in the car. Didn’t we agree I’d tell him later?
“How did you get in here?” I ask to change the subject.
“I’m a cop. I know how to pick locks. You really think you can keep me away?”
“I can try,” I mumble.
“What happened?” he asks gently.
It’s not fair. If I want to, I can tell Diego. He’s a cop. He’s in the same department as me. Yet I made a big deal about it with Dean.
That’s it. No more guys. They’re just friends, nothing more.
Although it causes my neck to tighten, I grin. “I fell off the Cliffs of Insanity.”
“Inconceivable. Actually, very conceivable.” The mirth in his eyes fades away, and he grows uncharacteristically serious. “You mentioned the animal attacks. I don’t understand why you’re worried about those cases especially since there might have been another vamp attack.”
“What!” I jolt up. I slept lying down flat as a board, stiff and immobile. Leaping up like this is a shock to my system, and it brings tears to my eyes.
“Whoa there. Slow down, partner.” Diego reaches for me.
“Don’t you dare come near my shoulders,” I warn.
He lowers his hands. “You aren’t up for this.”
“I have to,” I plead. “I want to see the victim. Or the crime scene. If I have to, I’ll get down on my knees.”
“You’ll never get up again.” Diego rolls his eyes and sighs in exasperation. A hint of a smile ghosts his lips, though. For some reason, it makes me really happy to see it. “I thought you’d never ask. Let’s go.”
Seriously? He’s not going to lecture me? Put me down? Act like I’m crazy?
If I could, I would fling myself into his arms.
Yeah, maybe it’s a good thing I can’t hug him. There’s no way he wouldn’t read anything into that. Teasing’s one thing. Flirting’s another. He’s the terrible flirt. Not me. He and I… we’re only friends.
None of your other cop friends would allow you to do this.
I shove the unwanted thought away.
I’m numb yet, which is wonderful, but I am careful, oh so careful, not to swing my arms. I definitely don’t use them to push up to standing.
Diego comes over to assist and wraps his arms around my waist. He easily lifts me up.
“I don’t—“
“I know you don’t,” he murmurs.
“As long as you know,” I mumble.
Getting me into the car is a complicated affair.
He goes to buckle me.
“Don’t get handsy,” I warn critically.
“Never unless you ask for it.” He cinches the seat belt, hardly touching me at all, and winks. “You will ask for it.”
“Of course.” I grin sweetly. “In your dreams.”
“You and your tongue.”
Diego shakes his head and gently ease my door shut. He struts around the front of his car and climbs in. I’m amazed he remembers to shut his door carefully. So, he can show restraint and be considerate. Who knew?
“This is crazy,” I murmur, amazed and maybe a little dismayed too. “I can’t believe you’re letting me do this.”
“I know you. You’ll leave with or without me. I’d much rather be your chauffeur. Keep an eye on you.”
“I don’t need—“
He doesn’t look at me. Just smirks and raises an eyebrow.
“Yeah, yeah,” I grumble.
“I’ll just say this. When I’ve gone up against vampires, I didn’t end up looking like that.”
“It wasn’t a vamp this time.”
“You gonna tell me what it was? A predator of some kind? A bear or—“
“A wolf,” I mumble.
“A wolf?” He’s only just now turned on the car. Instead of placing his hands on the wheel, he lowers them to his lap. “Why do I get the feeling it wasn’t just an ordinary wolf.”
“Because it wasn’t.” I exhale and wince. The numbness is leaving, the door now open for pain to flood in. Who’s crazier for allowing this venture? Me or him?
“What was it then?”
“Come on now.” I force a smile. “Take a wild stab at it.”
“No.”
“Yes.”
“That’s not possible.”
“Did you get a look at my shoulder? It looks like an animal gnawed on it because an animal did gnaw on it.”
“Yes, but… I guess it’s not that unbelievable. If vampires are real… How did you discover it? When? Why didn’t you tell me right away?”
“Just drive. Please. I don’t know if I can handle sitting here for long.” I want to fidget, but it’ll just increase my pain. My stomach churns, and it’s taking everything in me not to be sick.
Diego drives off. He takes turns slow, and he avoids all of the potholes. Just the gentle jostling of the car is enough to bring tears to my eyes.
It takes ten minutes to arrive. The crime scene is a beaten path off the road, an abandoned jogging trail that is seriously overgrown.
“I’ll never be a runner,” Diego announces. “They find too many bodies. Always struck me as suspicious.”
I snort. “Ow. Don’t make me laugh.”
He opens the car door, but I wave him off and unbuckle myself. Getting up by myself isn’t happening.
“This is humiliating,” I mutter.
“You’re the one who wanted to come here. You wanna go back?”
“No. We’re here. Let me see.”
“It’s been looked over already,” he warns. “The body removed.”
“So the person died,” I murmur.
“Yeah.” He goes to put his arm around my waist.
I shake my head. If he does that, my arms can’t hang by my sides.
Instead, he goes behind me, hands near my waist, but not before I catch a glimpse of the stricken look on his face. It takes a lot to unnerve him. I’m frightened to contemplate what the body looked like.
Thankfully, we don’t have far to walk before I spy the yellow police line tape. There’s nothing to see here. The fog is long gone. There are several footprints in the grass, but I wonder if they’re from the victims and the officers on the scene.
Officers on the scene. Should’ve been me. Well, me and Angelo and Diego and Rex.
I swallow hard. “Who all knows I’m out of commission?”
“Everyone.”
“Who found the body? When? Who examined the scene?”
“A tip called it in. Rex examined the scene himself.”
“Why didn’t you go with him?” I ask, confused.
“I was helping you,” he says simply.
While I distracted Amarok, a vamp struck. That can’t be a coincidence.
Diego bends down to examine the grass. It’s painful, so painful that I want to cry, but I bring out my cell.
“What are you doing?” Diego asks. “I’ll look it up for you.”
I hand it to him. I’ve never been one to accept help easily, but now is not the time to be macho. I need to accept my limits or else I’m a goner.
“Add the coordinates to the map,” I ask.
He does and shows me the screen.
We’re on the edge of the star, within Amarok’s range.
“Nothing to see here.” Diego runs a hand through his dark hair. His olive-skinned complexion is a little pale. If I wasn’t hurting so badly, I might be worried about him, for him. “Not sure coming here was worth it.”
“It’s all right.” I inhale and exhale a few times. The desire to collapse is so high.
“Hey,” Diego says slowly. “We aren’t that far from where you called me.”
“No. Let’s head over.”
It’s a slow painstaking process, but we head to the park. It’s seriously crowded now. The second glances I get don’t bother me. I’m wearing a sleeveless shirt. My bandages are on full display. It’s cold out, but I think I’m shivering for a different reason. No way can I handle wearing a coat. The idea of sleeves makes me cringe.
Diego does most of the looking for me, but it’s evident to me that Amarok is gone.
Wonderful. I’m back to square one where the killer vamp zombie wolf is concerned. That a vamp is back and on a killing spree is icing on the cake.
“Bring me home please,” I whisper.
Diego steps in front of me, his face uncharacteristically serious. “I should never have brought you out here.”
“You said so yourself that I would’ve found a way out here anyhow.”
“I should’ve forced you to stay home,” he says stubbornly, critically. “Locked you in.”
“Because that would’ve gone over well.”
“Clarissa, you’re ready to drop.”
Case in point, I sway on my feet. It really isn’t easy to walk right now. My vision grows dark, and that’s all I know.
Chapter 22
When I wake up, I’m back on the couch. The front door is locked. Diego isn’t around. I’m all alone. Isolated. Abandoned.
When I sit up, I’m sick. Luckily, Diego left the bucket for me beside the couch. Even better? My aim is true. Oh, man. I am really in a bad way. I feel just awful.
Rolf. He came after me. Because Amarok bit me? I’m not going to turn into a werewolf, am I? Why would Rolf want to prevent that? Then again, turning into a wolf might explain why I’m so sick.
I can’t lift my arms, but they aren’t completely worthless. My elbows and wrists give the only extent of movement I can utilize. My shoulders give me so much pain. I’m one giant ball of hurt. Thankfully, there are a few cups already filled with water on the coffee table. Even better, each cup has a straw in it. I can’t reach to turn on the faucet, and a straw means I won’t have to tilt it.
I take my pills. My food options are limited, but that might not be a bad thing considering my weak stomach. I opt for a banana and an apple.
Having eaten, I relax back on the couch. I should probably call a few people, like Samantha, Dean, Rex or the lieutenant. Too late. My eyes are already beginning to close.
Knocking at the door has me groaning. It’s locked, so I can’t tell the person to come in.
“Go away,” I call.
“Open up.”
The voice is muffled, and although it sounds familiar, I can’t place the owner.
“No one’s home,” I grumble.
“I can bust down this door.”
The growl is unmistakable.
“Rolf,” I say through gritted teeth. “I will cut you down. I will shoot you dead if you break in. Leave now if you value your life!”
“I do value my life.” He pauses. “And I value yours, too.”
“Really? Because you must have turned over a new leaf. You tried to kill me, or did you forget?” I’m fuming. The only good thing about being livid is that it keeps my mind from the pain.
“If you value your own life, you’ll open the door.”
“Not happening,” I ground out critically. Just because my body is less than powerful doesn’t mean the spark of anger and resentment isn’t full force.
“Clarissa, seriously.”
Something in his tone surprises me. He sounds remorseful and urgent.
But he had been pretty urgent when he tried to kill me…
“Let’s continue talking like this,” I suggest distantly, “through the door.”
“Are you kidding me?” His exasperation makes me crack a smile. “This is not a conversation for others to hear!”
“Yeah, well, I kinda want to stay alive.”
“I will help with that,” he says quietly.
“Forgive me if I don’t believe you.”
“You’ve lived this long after being bitten. That’s… It should be impossible. You… You’re…”
“What? I’m what?”
I catch my breath. I’m dying with curiosity. Is this why the vamps won’t kill me? The one had been willing to bite me, but the others had been so reluctant. I always suspected there was a reason behind it.
“Open up.”
“Give me a sec. I’m not moving fast.”
I shift and slide to a standing position. Instead of heading straight for the door, I grab my gun. It feels so natural in
my hand. A cop and her or his gun is an extension, a part of you.
“You coming?” he calls impatiently.
“Hold your horses.” I remove the blood bullet and pocket it. Only now do I go over and open the door.
His gaze takes in my appearance, my bandages, and, lastly, the gun. “You can trust me.”
“I thought I could, but then you wanted to finish Amarok’s job.”
“You don’t understand,” he says. Desperation bleeds in his tone. The wild fear in his eyes churns my stomach.
“Come in.” I leave him to open the door wider and return to my perch on the couch.
He closes and locks the door without my having to prompt him. “You’re really in a bad way.”
“Ya think?” I ask sarcastically.
“You shouldn’t be alive,” he says promptly.
“A bite from Amarok leads to death?”
“Amarok doesn’t allow anyone to live once he sets his sight on them.” Rolf crosses over and examines my pill bottles.
“Leave those alone, nosy,” I snap.
“That’s not what you need to get better.”
“Really? So you’re a doctor now?”
“No. Nothing like that. I just know what you’re up against.”
“There’s more you aren’t telling me.” My mind’s a little foggy from the pain. I might be dehydrated, too. “If you don’t tell me why you tried to kill me…”
I bring up the gun and level it with his gut. It might or might not kill him, depending on what I hit. Too bad I’m not willing to lift my arms high enough to aim at his head. I just can’t do it.
“Put that down,” he snaps.
“I’m sick and tired of your tone,” I snap right back. Fury and frustration are making me cranky. “Start talking or leave.”
“Fine. There have been rumors that a few of the people that Amarok bites don’t die. They change.”
“Into what? Werewolves? Is that how the werewolves first came about?”
“No. The ones bitten go mad. They drink blood. They eat flesh. They don’t change appearance at all, but they’re changed. They have to be put down.”
When Wolves Howl: A Mayhem of Magic World Story (Bedlam in Bethlehem Book 2) Page 14