“That was my question. You’re a long way from Tennessee, or Arkansas for that matter.”
“We’re just in town doing a charity gig, then we’re heading home again. I think Ren’s planning to do … oh hey, I’m sorry.”
“No bother Jed. I’m really fine and I am glad to see you. We’re at the Sorrento, know where that is?”
“I should, we’re staying there,” he said as he swung out into traffic.
Oh no. No, no, no, no, no. What were the chances? What were the odds? I started to hyperventilate and Marlene put her hand on my shoulder from the back seat.
Jed sensed my discomfort and put a hand on my knee to reassure me. “It’s all right Rachel, I just dropped them off at the venue for a sound check. He won’t be back to the hotel until after the concert.”
“Great. Okay. Can you do me a favor?”
“Don’t tell him I saw you?”
“Yeah, that would be great.”
“He’s really missed you, girl. I’ll tell you that.”
“I noticed that what with all the emails, texts, letters and presents arriving every day.”
“I won’t tell him but if he finds out and finds out I knew I won’t get to sleep under the bus anymore. It’s a lot to ask.” We both laughed but I felt a wave of relief. We would go to the play and pop back into our room long before the concert ended. And if I knew The Taylor Brothers there was some local dive of a bar they would all hang out at for hours after. Playing darts, shooting pool, flirting with girls.
The last thought stung me like a wasp. I was so sure I was completely over him, how could I feel so bereft just at the thought of him flirting with a girl? Because I’m full of shit and I was not remotely over him. I had tried not to fall in love with him but trying isn’t doing and the heart doesn’t slow down due to inconvenience or age differences. I was in love with him and probably always would be.
In a futile effort to move past him I had gone on several ‘dates’ through Plenty of Fish. All had been fine men, my age, ready to have a partner for the rest of their lives. They just did nothing for me. Marlene and Caroline said I was too picky, that not all my dates would be internationally famous musicians with bodies so sick they needed emergency treatment. (Apparently having a ‘sick’ body means it’s awesome according to Caroline. Kids these days.)
I tried, I really did but I finally pulled my profile after realizing that once you’ve gone Renny you never go back.
I wondered if Ren had tried to date. I had purposely not gone on any entertainment web sites, TV shows or news outlets. I didn’t want to know. But I did and the temptation to ask Jed was almost too much for me. Luckily we arrived at the hotel before I could do further damage to my heart strings.
The rest of the night was a blur. I wore my best outfit (no Spanx!) to the play, enjoyed it immensely and we opted for room service after just to make sure we didn’t bump into any random Taylor Brothers. I was grateful to Marlene for going along with me but this was her vacation too and we had two more days here. We couldn’t hide in our room forever, it wasn’t fair to her.
One of my ex-lovers lives in Seattle and he took control of us early the next day. Rob and I had put our doomed love affair to rest many moons ago and we were great friends. The fact that he was openly gay now and had a terrific partner made the whole thing a lot of fun. Marlene and he had met so the four of us went out to Issaquah for a little retail therapy and the promise of some hot tubing.
I sighed with relief as I sped through the lobby and into Rob’s waiting car and slouched down as we left the drive. Issaquah was far enough away from Seattle that I felt I had dodged the bullet. Jed had said they were heading home today so I was sure we would have Seattle to ourselves for our last day in town tomorrow. Good. I was glad. So there, Renny Taylor.
Again, the bullshit factor was pretty strong.
I arrived home two days later to a lengthy email and a Fedex overnight package from Amanda. Let the re-writes begin. I needed a shower first so I took a lengthy hot one, wrapped myself in my best flannel jammies, poured a glass of wine and sat down to look at Amanda’s notes.
I was deep into Chapter Three when the doorbell rang. Without thinking I went to open it, manuscript in hand, hair scraggly and wet, not a lick of make-up on and shrouded in bulky flannels with moose on them.
There stood Renny. He was not scraggly, wet or bulky. He was lithe, handsome and on my doorstep.
“Can I come in?”
“Now?” I asked.
“That’s what I was thinking,” he said, half his mouth rising in the way I thought I was totally over.
“I look like shit,” I blurted without thinking.
“I don’t care Rachel. It’s taken all my courage to ring this bell, either let me in or slam the door.”
What was I going to do, slam the door? I couldn’t and to be honest I didn’t even want to. Feelings I’d thought subdued played havoc with my knees and I found it hard to even step back to let him in. To be honest, I thought I might faint. Just like some fan girl. That would be just awesome, Drake.
I managed to stay upright as he loitered in the hallway. I’d never seen Renny uncertain, about anything, but he was definitely at a loss for what to do next.
“Why are you here? Bus break down?”
“No. I’m here because, well, I’m not quite sure.”
“You came to Portland, all the way from Seattle and you have no idea why?”
He laughed and some of the tension dissipated. “Actually I’ve been hiding at the Benson getting my courage up and trying to figure out what to say. I couldn’t so I figured I’d wing it.”
No, you figured I’d fling my arms around you and beg you to take me in the hallway. Ain’t happening buddy.
“So let’s start with some wine and then you can try winging it.”
We both moved into the kitchen but Ren stopped right where we had slaked our lust for each other (as they say in romance novels) a few months ago. We both looked down. We both turned red. We both turned away, me to the cabinets to get another wine glass and Renny to the couch, where he folded up his frame into a sitting position.
I handed him the wine which he set down on the side table without taking a sip. He was fiddling with his fingers and pulling on his shirt. I liked this nervous side of him, it made me feel calmer somehow. Obviously what he had come to say was hard for him. Good. Handsome bastard.
“I’ve had a lot of time to think, Rachel,” he started in a fairly cliché way. “First of all, I was so pissed that you took off in the middle of the night. That was just mean.”
“I’m sorry but there was nothing left to say. I didn’t relish an awkward, protracted good-bye. I wanted to spare both of us.”
“Yeah, I know but man, it was like getting punched in the gut. I thought we had more to hash out.”
“We didn’t. Obviously.”
“No, we did, I just needed to do some hashing on my own. What you said that night, about not having children, it hit me really hard. I hadn’t even considered that angle. I was so overwhelmed with my feelings for you that I hadn’t stopped to think.”
“Neither had I Ren. If Reade hadn’t brought it up who knows, but he did and I’m glad he did. We were living in a fog. I’m sure you can see that now.”
“It was a great fog. It had you with me and that’s all I really wanted.”
“But now you’ve had time to clear the air, so to speak.”
“Sort of. I do want a family, maybe, someday. I can’t deny that.”
My stomach fell through the floor. What had I expected he was going to say? I don’t want anything but you? Ridiculous.
“But I also want you, and not someday, today and every day.”
“You can’t have both Renny. I’m sorry. If I could change it I would.”
“No, I know. I’m not sure I’d change anything about you, truly. You are who you are because of the years you’ve lived. I can’t change either.”
“So where does th
at leave us?”
“I don’t know. I thought you might.’
He tried to take my hand but I grabbed it back, angry all of a sudden.
“Why did you come here then? Why couldn’t you just leave it alone? I’ve moved on Renny. I’ve written my book. It’s going to be published. I’m me again. I can’t go back to being that love-sick woman chasing a man she has no future with.”
“It isn’t the future Rachel, it’s now. And right now I want to be with you and no one else. Look, neither of us have any idea of what the future holds.”
“We know what it doesn’t hold.”
“You assume we’re going to live another 20 years, that the choice will come up. Hell, you have no idea what might happen. I might die in a plane crash tomorrow,” he yelled.
“Well, we can only hope.”
“What?”
Everything stopped. I was on the edge and I knew it. Everything he was saying made sense. Yes, all we do have is now. Yes, either of us could die or change our minds or… The future is always a big unknown we had no control over and I hated it.
I had to say something, he looked so dejected and hurt. The truth was that I already loved him and nothing was going to change that. I would love him until I died and maybe beyond if several religions are correct. I wanted him too, no matter what it cost.
“That came out wrong. I’m sorry, I say stupid things when I’m scared.”
His shoulders relaxed, the smile was back. He came over to me and took both my hands, bending down to look me in the eyes.
“I know you’re scared, Rachel. Everyone is scared when they’re falling in love.”
“Is that what we’re doing?”
“I think so.”
“Well, can you let me know when you’re sure?”
“You… you are a very difficult woman Rachel Drake.”
“You don’t know the half of it, I’m on good behavior right now.”
“Thanks for the warning. So?”
“So. Okay.”
“Okay? You’re saying what is okay exactly?”
“We’ll see what happens.”
“You’re sure?”
“I think so,” I said, repeating Ren’s words.
“You better not be playing with my emotions Rachel Drake, you know how sensitive I am.”
“I do. I will never play with your emotions, I promise.”
“Good.”
He pulled me to him and kissed me lightly before putting his hand on my hair and increasing the intensity. Ooo, I was so gone, so in trouble, so happy.
When we finally parted, I grabbed his remarkable ass.
“So, if I can’t play with your emotions, can I at least play with your body?”
“You want to play with my body? Now? After all that?”
“I do. And I am sure about it.”
“Well, I guess, if you’re sure about it.”
I was. And I did. And all I will say is that Renny Taylor’s body is a hell of a playground.
__________________________________________________________________________
I have always loved the sound of rain on the roof. To me it is the most peaceful sound in the world and has always made me feel safe.
Renny and I spooned in my small double bed, happy and calm, letting the rain lull us to sleep. I knew he had to leave in the morning and that our life together would be a succession of hellos and goodbyes, but it was all worth it for moments like this.
Because Renny is always too warm he had his leg outside the covers wrapped around me. The strength flowing through his arms covered me and his silky curtain of hair covered my face. He took up most of the bed but I didn’t care, I’d sleep in the tour bus bunk beds with this man. Hell, I’d slept in tents with scorpions all around and bombs going off too close for comfort. A sexy, younger man was much, much better.
I fell asleep easily, drained of all my misery and satiated with happiness. I woke to Renny moving beside me. I cracked open my eyes but there was no light showing so I knew it wasn’t time for him to leave. I still had my back to him and was so sleepy that what happened next took me by surprise and felt like a dream all at the same time.
His hands slowly caressed my breasts and then moved to my belly and below. We were both naked so there was no coyness about his touch. I stretched like a cat basking in the sun as he stroked me. He nibbled on the back of my neck and covered my shoulders with tiny kisses. I tried to turn over to face him but he stopped me without a word being spoken. I could hear his breathing become shallower and faster as mine caught up to match him. Just as I felt I could no longer stay silent he moved my top leg back behind me and over his leg as he slipped his hard and ready cock into my swollen, slippery vagina. He moved with grace and assurance but neither of us spoke. The only sound in the room was our in tandem breathing gradually rising to meet each other in sublime passion.
I arched my back as we both shuddered at the same time. For those few precious seconds we were truly one body, moving in a primordial dance of love.
As easily as he had entered he slipped away. I always hated the moment his body released mine and I felt it even stronger at this moment than ever before. I would wear him inside me like a talisman against aloneness if I could.
We both settled back into sleep. Maybe it was just a dream. If so, I vowed to stay asleep forever.
Unfortunately, the earth does indeed revolve around the sun. The rain had stopped and a bright morning awaited us. I didn’t want to get up and I didn’t really have to. Renny had rented a car to take him to the airport so there was no reason for me to ever leave this cozy little lust haven.
Renny rose, made coffee and brought cups of steaming Joe and bagels into the bedroom. There are times when the universe is in complete synchronicity and this was one of them. How had I ever thought I could live without this man? How had I done it for 58 years already?
I slid back under the covers and must have drifted for a moment because the next thing I knew Ren was sitting on the side of the bed, freshly showered and dressed. I grabbed his hand, “No,” I said like a petulant child.
“I’ll call tonight and we’ll make plans for you to come to Tennessee for the reunion next month, all right?”
“Are you sure? Meeting the family seems a little premature.”
“I want you to see the Taylor compound.”
“That sounds ominous. I’m not being recruited into a cult, am I? I’ll still go but it would be nice to know.”
“No cult baby girl, just some Southern cooking, lazing by the river and hanging with family, all 105 of them.”
I shot up in bed. “105?”
“If you count the Arkansas tribe which we do or don’t depending on the year. Right now, they are in, so yeah, we hit 105 when Claudia was born.”
“They won’t all be there, will they? I’m not very good with names.”
He laughed, throwing his shaggy mane back. “Just call ‘em all Bubba, no one will know the difference.”
He leaned down to kiss me before whispering, “I gotta go. See you soon.”
Then he was out the door, through the yard and into his rental car. It roared into life taking my love away from me. Sometimes I hate how easily we can move from place to place. Right at the moment a covered wagon seemed like the perfect pace.
I couldn’t linger in bed all day. I had corrections to start on my book, Marlene to update and water to start drinking by the gallon.
I threw on my glamorous chenille robe and slipped into the kitchen. There, in the center of the counter was a folded note with my name on it.
I recognized the writing.
I opened it and tears of pure joy sprang from my eyes. It contained only two words. Short and sweet.
‘I’m sure.’
Me too, Renny, me too.
THE END – FOR NOW …..
Don’t miss Book 2 of Renny and Rachel’s story
The Reunion: His and Hers Jealousy
Coming to Kindle June 1st!
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Thank you!!
Her Younger Man (A Country Music Romance): a Renny and Rachel Romance Page 9