“Get off me,” she grumbled. “I can’t breathe.” She coughed, an exceptionally bad imitation. “You’re so into Christmas; I wanted to do something you’d remember.”
I grabbed her arm and dragged her back to the sidewalk. “And look—lights.” I pointed to the strands running vertically behind Santa.
“You’re giving me a headache.”
“We need pictures,” I said, full of excitement. “Lots and lots of pictures.” I reached out to hug her again.
She held her hands out to ward me off. “Control yourself or I’ll take it back.”
“I can’t wait to see it lit up at night.”
“You want me to get you a beach chair so you can sit out here?”
“Get four. All of us can sit out here and wave to the neighbors.”
She laughed, giving me a look that said it would never happen.
“Best present ever.” I beamed at her and finally followed her into the house.
It wasn’t until we were standing in the entry that I remembered seeing the guys’ cars parked across the street. Didier was in the kitchen, head in the refrigerator, offering a nice view of his muscular backside.
I kicked off my shoes and turned into the kitchen. “Did you see Santa?”
“He’s hard to miss.” Didier chuckled. “Your light guy had a small air compressor in the back of his van, which meant we didn’t have to unpack him at the gas station and then figure out how to get him back here.” He winked at Fab, then dragged her to his side, planting a kiss on her head.
I grabbed a bottle of water from the refrigerator and held it out to Fab. She nodded, and I handed it off, grabbing another one. “Why are the French doors closed?” I peered into the living room. The cats were asleep on the daybed, instead of their favorite place just inside the doors to the patio.
“You are not to go out there,” Didier ordered in a no-nonsense tone.
Fab stepped in front of me, blocking me from heading in that direction.
“Another surprise?” I flashed Fab a huge smile.
She shrugged. “Not in on this one. Neither Didier nor Creole would tell me what they’re up too.”
The patio door opened, and Creole poked his head inside. “What’s taking so long?” He looked at me and Fab. “You two…” he said.
Creole and Didier exchanged a look.
I needed a class in guy code—they weren’t as easy to read as Fab.
“I told them,” Didier said.
Creole crossed the room and dropped a kiss on my lips. “You promise not to come out until we say?” I nodded. “You,” he said to Fab. “Promise Didier.”
I almost laughed at her look of frustration.
Creole motioned for Didier to join him. “Since you two are in the kitchen, why don’t you rustle us up some dinner?” The guys laughed as they headed back to the patio.
The look Fab shot Creole should’ve at least singed his eyebrows.
I took up the challenge. “Dinner at six, and we’re eating outside.”
When the door closed, Fab asked, arms crossed, “Why did you offer to cook?”
“Who said the word cook?” I looked around. “Not me.” I pulled my phone out of my pocket. “I’m ordering from Jake’s and having it delivered. Cook’s testing some new items I haven’t had a chance to sample.”
~ ~ ~
The guys came back in the house before the deadline.
“Ready for you,” Didier announced.
Creole took a scarf from his back pocket and twirled it around before tying it around my eyes. “I’ve got you,” he said, gripping my arm and leading me forward.
The first thing I heard after crossing the threshold was the sound of Christmas music coming through the speakers. We continued for several feet across the patio before coming to a halt.
“Surprise!” Fab yelled from behind me, which made me jump and then laugh.
Creole untied the scarf.
“So beautiful.” I clapped my hands to my cheeks, staring up at the tallest Christmas tree I’d ever seen. “You grinches, it was all an act.” I kissed Creole and whispered, “You wait until later.” I ran over to Didier and hugged him and kissed his cheek.
“How tall is it?” Fab asked as she snapped pictures.
“Twelve feet,” Creole told her. “With any luck, we can get it back in the box and use it next year.”
“Looks real.” I ran my hand over the branches. “Good choice. Just the right amount of lights. And decorations. You two were busy.” I walked around the tree. “Great place to hide if we get an intruder.”
Creole shook his head. “Let’s hope that doesn’t happen. No clue how many ornaments we’d need—came out on the short side.”
“It’s perfect,” I said. “If we want more, we’ll make it a tradition to add new ones every year.”
“Doorbell?” Didier headed inside.
“It’s the dinner I cooked,” I said to his retreating back.
“Where do you want the food?” Creole asked.
“Bring it out here. Fab and I can set the table, and we can enjoy the newest addition.”
He nodded and followed Didier inside.
“They did a good job,” Fab said.
“Yes, they did, and so did you.” I hugged her again.
“Enough already. You need to set the table. I’ll do my part and supervise.”
I’d planted some little mini-poinsettias for centerpieces, and so far, they had remained in hearty shape. Opening a nearby cupboard, I pulled out some red dishes and silverware, hurriedly setting the table.
~ ~ ~
When dinner was over, I refilled the red enamelware bucket with ice and added more beers. I picked up the pitcher of what was left of my margaritas and set both the bucket and pitcher on the table just as Fab said something nice to Creole. That had my antenna on high alert, as he hadn’t done anything specific and she typically didn’t hand out compliments.
Sitting next to Creole, I finished off what was left of my drink. Creole reached for the pitcher and refilled my glass.
“You said if I ever needed backup for a job that you’d help out,” Fab said to Creole.
“This is about Brick’s job, isn’t it?” I glared at her over the rim of my glass, then set it down, not quite a slam but close enough. “Forget it.” I pounded my fist on the table. “In case I’m not being clear—” I leaned in her direction. “—Creole’s not going. And neither is Didier.”
“They’re grown men and can decide for themselves,” Fab fumed.
“I’m well aware of what they are,” I said. “Having learned a lot from their bossy ways, I’m ripping a page from their book. Not. Going. Don’t think you’re going to sneak one of them out behind my back either. That will force me to track you down and shoot you in the butt, and maybe nick them just because they didn’t pay attention and decided to ignore me.”
“When have I ever nicked you?” Creole asked in mock outrage, amusement lighting up his eyes.
“It’s fortunate for our relationship that you haven’t resorted to such tactics.” I smiled sweetly.
Fab glared at Didier, who stared down at the label on his beer bottle, shoulders shaking.
“Calm down. I’ve got a Plan B,” Fab said in exasperation.
Testing the waters? I bet Fab didn’t think her biggest hurdle would be me.
“Why don’t you run it by all of us?” I suggested sarcastically. “We’ll take a group vote, and in the spirit of putting all the cards on the table, my vote counts double the guys’. Ready? This should be fun.”
If looks could kill, I’d have been toes up.
Didier raised his hand. “Sounds good to me.”
Creole nodded. “Whatever the boss says.”
“I’m sure the guys are wondering what the heck you’re talking about,” I said to Fab. “So I’ll start with the short version, and you fill in the details. This is that Brick case—sports car that didn’t get returned—and let’s not forget the phony relative sto
ry,” I added in disgust.
Fab relayed the particulars, barely adding to what I’d already said. “Plan B—and since contracting out my jobs was your idea, I’m sure you’ll approve—” The smile she gave me lacked sincerity. “—I thought this would be a good job to hand off to one of my associates and see how it goes.”
“That should’ve been Plan A.” I finished off the rest of my second, or maybe third, margarita, half-stood, and glared down at her. “You’re lucky I don’t pull your hair out.”
Fab downed the last of her martini and put her dukes in the air.
Creole grabbed the back of my skirt, pulling me back into my chair.
“Ladies, as much fun as… well, never mind.” Didier laughed. “This isn’t WWF fight night.”
Palms on the table, I said, “You better point out all of the pitfalls to the unsuspecting schlub.”
“Got it.” Fab saluted.
“Another drink, anyone?” I asked, sticking my glass in the air.
Fab raised her martini glass, hanging it upside down.
Creole pushed my hand down.
“You two have been cut off.” Didier laughed.
Chapter Six
Fab rocketed into the parking lot of the Tropical Slumber Funeral Home. The lot was empty—even the hearse had been put away. She parked practically on the lawn. “Why are we the only ones here?” she asked.
The decorations had been found. Well, sort of. The husband-and-wife thieves had been caught in the act of stealing from another neighbor. Their excuse was they needed the items to decorate their own yard. Several of the inflatables matched the pictures that Dickie and Raul had taken, but another couple was also making a claim, which would make it impossible for the police to determine the rightful owner.
When Raul had called yesterday with the news that they wouldn’t be decorating this year, his disappointment rang through the phone. He’d tried to hire a service, because he and Raul couldn’t do it by themselves, but they were all booked.
I’d thrown out the idea of getting as many people as we could to bring one decoration apiece and stay to help get the front lawn back into shape. My thought was, with enough people, it could be done in a few hours. Today had turned out to be the best choice since no funerals were scheduled. It was Dickie’s idea to offer food and drinks.
“I called everyone I know, laid on the guilt and arm-twisted to get people here to help the guys out. I was annoyed with the lackluster response I got. And you?” I asked.
Fab and I had just come from Junker’s, and the back of the SUV was loaded with a hodge-podge of outside decorations.
“I told Didier, and he laughed at me. I’m not sure he believed me.”
“The guys snuck off this morning, like we wouldn’t notice. If that was their way of saying they don’t want to help, I’ll have plenty to say about that later. It’s hard to believe that they’d be a no-show. Even though they both commented that this place creeps them out.” I went around and opened the back door, dragging out a cardboard box of reindeer inflatables and a sleigh that Junker had hidden in the corner and nearly forgotten about. He’d been about to jack up the price in his typical style, but his seldom-seen wife insisted we just take them, since they couldn’t guarantee the condition.
Originally, Fab and I had decided to purchase a snowman family as our contribution, but when we went to pick it up, Fab had added Santa on a motorcycle and I’d tossed in Mickey and Minnie Mouse.
A sheriff’s car pulled in and parked next to the SUV. Kevin got out. “Who died?”
“You’re not funny,” I said. He flashed a pouty face. “We could use some help carrying this stuff.”
“You should’ve driven up on the lawn.” Kevin looked over his shoulder. “Besides, I’m here on official business.”
“Dead body in the trunk?” Fab asked, enjoying his look of annoyance.
“I’m coming,” Dickie yelled from the garage area. He started running, pushing an out-of-control hand truck.
“He’s going to fall down.” I shuddered and held my breath until he skidded to a stop in front of us.
“Officer,” Dickie said, out of breath.
“I’ve got an update on your theft case,” Kevin said.
“Let me go get Raul.” Dickie raced off.
“Energetic fellow.”
“Since when does law enforcement make house calls of this type?” I asked.
“Apparently, there is something that you’re the last to know. Those two—” He nodded at the two men crossing the parking lot. “—are good friends with the sheriff. Like this.” He crossed his fingers. “I was curious what they had in common but figured there was no good way to ask without coming off as a dick.”
Before the two men rejoined us, Fab and I had moved all the boxes out of the back of the SUV and onto middle of the lawn with Kevin’s help.
“You don’t look very happy—more bad news?” Raul asked.
“Kevin’s always a grouch,” Fab mumbled, but we all heard.
“You want to take this inside?” Kevin asked.
“We have nothing to hide from Fab and Madison.” Raul smiled at Fab.
“The Mathis couple did steal your inflatables. I found your markings on the bottoms, just where you said they’d be. That gives us a good case against them. According to the wife, her husband went on a drunken tear and… well… he vandalized a few of them beyond repair.” Kevin shifted uncomfortably.
“Mathis?” I asked, trying to recall where I’d heard the name. After a moment, I remembered. “Isn’t that the seventeen-year-old who married the forty-year-old woman?”
“That’s them.” Kevin grimaced. “I checked it out, and turns out, he got a note from his mom, so it was legal. I’m certain it was true love. When I showed up the second time, the wife threw her husband under the bus with lightning speed, claiming he was the brains of the operation.”
“She skated?” I asked.
“Oh no, she got hauled in and released on bail. Lover boy tried to escape custody by running, hands cuffed behind his back. I waited for him to fall, which he did after a couple of steps, and then hauled him in for booking. He also got bail, but apparently they only had enough assets for one of them to be released.”
“Why don’t you stick around and help with the redecoration?” Fab asked in a challenging tone.
“The goal is to have it decorated by the end of the day,” I said.
“The four of you?” Kevin asked. “As you can see, I’m on duty.”
I shot him a dirty look.
“Thanks to these two—” Raul smiled at Fab and me. “—several boxes of decorations arrived this morning, and we got them laid out.” He pointed to the lawn. “The display will be a little smaller, but since we have a ton of lights, that will fill in any holes.”
Three pickup trucks rolled into the parking lot, the first two with men in the back, some of them familiar faces from Jake’s. The last one had me smiling—Creole and Didier had shown up, and Liam jumped out of the back, along with a… dog? A German Shepherd, in fact.
The family had adopted Liam when his mother dated my brother. Even though that relationship had ended, we still considered him an official member of the family.
“What is that? Besides the obvious,” I asked, pulling Liam into a hug. “Can you have animals at school?”
“Left school this morning and hit the gas station. While I was there, a car pulled to the side of the road, dog hopped out to do his business, and the car took off. I got the license number, but I don’t want them getting the dog back. I’ll find it a home while I’m here on winter break.” Liam was spending part of his break from the University of Miami in the Cove before jetting off to be with his mom in California for the holidays.
I turned in time to see Creole and Didier smirking at me. I could read their minds—no dogs. “We’ll find him a good home.” I smiled at Liam, then down at the dog, who sat patiently between us. “You think he’s hungry?”
“I stopped a
nd got him two double burgers and a couple of large waters.”
“Did you actually manage to sneak a big dog into Mother’s condo?”
“She was cool about it once I assured her I’d be finding him a home.”
“Does she know that you and the dog are out gallivanting around?” He lived at Mother’s when not away at school, and she watched him like a hawk and rarely let him out of her sight.
“Grandmother went to do errands before I got the call to contribute my brawn.” Liam flexed his muscles. “I left a note.”
Astro and Necco came around the back of the main building. They spotted “Dog” at the same time he spotted them, did a double take, and the three raced towards each other.
“Go be a dog wrangler and make sure nothing bad happens,” I said to Liam, who started off after them.
After a thorough sniff, a chase ensued, including barking and jumping. One of the Dobermans raced off and came back with a Frisbee that he dropped at Liam’s feet. Liam started throwing it and soon had them running in circles.
I overheard Dickie offer Kevin food, telling him he’d set up a buffet in the main room, where all the services took place. Kevin shook his head. I was certain it was because he didn’t want to go inside if he didn’t have to.
“I have to get back to work,” he said.
“I can prepare a plate, and you can take it with you,” Dickie offered.
Kevin readily agreed.
Dickie turned to go. “Kevin likes Coke,” I called. He nodded.
Kevin turned on me, I figured to complain about my sticking my nose in his business, and I scooted around him and headed straight to Creole, who was already organizing the men piling out of the trucks, one driven by Mac and the other by Doodad. Didier scooped Fab off her feet, twirling her around.
Dickie had set up a wide variety of cold sodas and bottled waters in bins filled with ice under a large tiki umbrella in the middle of the patio. Raul shepherded everyone over, and they helped themselves before going to work. Two air compressors and a generator had been unloaded off one of the trucks and were now being used to blow up the various pieces. A small assembly line formed, tying string and pounding in stakes.
Christmas in Paradise Page 4