Meet Me Halfway

by Xyla Turner

  My hand reached under the bed and grabbed the other glossy pictures and one of them pinged my heart. It was a young Knox with a picture of the red-haired women in his arms as he kissed the top of her head.

  "What the fuck are you doing with those?" I heard the steely voice above me.

  "Gathering my panties." I picked up my purple lace underwear and slid the pictures back under the bed. "Just need to use the ladies room and I'll be ready."

  Standing up, I threw the panties in my open suitcase on the bed and made my way to the bathroom. When I returned, Knox was still in the same position with his head down.

  "Ready?" I asked as I zipped the small carryon.

  When my eyes looked at his form, it looked like he was containing himself. Then he uttered, "You had no right!"

  "Uh, no." My head shook. "I was looking for my panties and that's how I found your precious stash. I wasn't snooping."

  Knox lifted his head and those blazing eyes burned through me.

  "You had no fucking right!" he growled.

  "Look, let's go because I'm telling you I wasn't going out of my way trying to find anything. It's just some pictures." I shrugged and quickly pulled my bag off the bed. "Come on."

  I made my way to the door of his room but he was still standing there.

  "Okay then, don't come." I shrugged, pulled out my phone and tapped on the taxi app.

  What I wasn't going to do was miss my plane because he wanted to be angry. Ten minutes later, he came downstairs and said, "Let's go."

  "A taxi is coming, no worries. You don't have to take me," I chimed in.

  His head snapped to me, when he hissed, "Get your shit and come on."

  The asshole was out to play, so I briefly considered my options. I was currently in a town where a taxi service was thirty minutes away. Knox had already proven he'd leave me to fend for myself, or I could take my chances and be stuck in Libby until I could get another flight which would definitely be the next day.

  Slowly, I rose to my feet, gathered my things, and walked out of his house. For good this time, because nothing could ever make me come back to deal with his brooding ass. Honestly, the way I felt at that moment, nothing could make me deal with him ever again.

  We arrived at the airport and I let him do his thing; get my bags, walk me to the front.

  "Thank you for the weekend and the ride, Knox," I said with a forced smile.

  "Nina, wait." He took a step towards me but I shook my head.

  "No, it's fine. It really is...we said we'd work it till it didn't work no more and clearly, that's where we're at, right?" I offered.

  He said nothing, which said everything.

  "Well, good luck to you." I nodded and went through the double doors at a quicker speed than I anticipated.

  Yeah, nothing would bring me back here ever again.

  Chapter Eight

  Knox:

  We were fuck buddies and that was all, right? Fuck what J.D. had to say about traveling or even meeting my family. She'd already met them before, so it didn't count. There was nothing to us and there would never be anything with as fucked up as I was.

  I had dealt with my lot in life a long time ago, so being a heartless son of a bitch was fine with me. I even embraced the title. The problem was that I wasn't when it came to Nina. She made me soft and that scared me because the last time I was soft, I nearly broke in two.

  That couldn't happen again and I needed to make sure of that.

  It was two months before I even found the courage to reach out to Nina. There were no drunk texts, messages or anything. As a matter of fact, the woman had sent my shit back to me. iPad, my Stetson that I left there for her, and one of my shirts with my company's logo on the front.

  She was done with me, I had no doubts.

  I deserved it.

  Despite this reality, what they were doing to the residents was atrocious, so I decided to work directly with the County Commissioner ’s office. The man seemed more than glad to work with me because some New Yorker with a local family was giving him a run for his money and he was just looking out for to the fiduciary responsibility for the county. The County Commissioner claimed the county needed a stop between the main city and downtown. Therefore, Evans was the spot. However, if they could do it in a way that the homes weren't being torn down, he was down for that.

  Therefore, me and my associates provided a way for that to happen, that cost less money for the county and put most of the investment back where it belonged. The deal with The Wellman Group was dead and now we were in business.

  After Pops laid me out for the umpteenth time, I hadn't seen him for another two months, which this time brought my other brother to my place of business. It wasn't too long ago, I was at J.D.'s job trying to get him to get his shit together. So, I knew the deal.

  Very well.

  "Man, you sure know how to piss Pops off." Mills sat his uninvited ass down in my small makeshift of an office.

  "Not looking to piss nobody off." I kept drawing out the schematics of the addition.

  My guys and I were at a site that would take us a couple of months to reconstruct and add on the addition that was needed for the business to expand.

  "Yet, you always manage to do just that," he remarked.

  My head tilted towards him.

  "Something you want?" I asked, wanting him to get to the chase.

  "Yeah, need some brotherly advice." Mills removed his Stetson and said, "Rebecca and I are no longer working and it's time for something different. I feel like I'm a squirrel just trying to get a nut by going up the same tree that has very few nuts. She’s alright and everything but we’re not working out."

  Well, that shit grabbed my attention. He and Rebecca had been together since high school, if I wasn’t mistaken. She was okay but nothing to write home about.

  "What do you mean, trying to get a nut?" I stopped drawing so I could pay close attention.

  He shook his head and said, "I mean, I’m looking for more than what we have. She’s nice and all but I we’re not on the same page. She says little shit that makes me so fucking mad. Like our family thinks we’re better than everyone else or I’m so smart and she doesn’t measure up. I never look at shit like that but it bothers her. That don’t bother me. What bothers me is her lack of ambition. She don’t know what she want to do so, she don’t do nothing. That shit is irritating."

  Yeah, I had heard a comment or two over the years that didn’t sit right with me. Some shit about all of us having our own businesses and having a Libby monopoly. It was mentioned as a joke but there was something else under that.

  "What’s changed?" I asked my younger brother.

  "Exposure?" He shook his head. "Understanding about what I want in life. The type of partner I want, someone who shares some of the same interest. She’s caring and loving. Sassy and challenging. Sexy as hell."

  I looked up because if I didn’t know better I’d think he already met this partner he was referring to.

  “I see,” I said with a side eye.

  "What made you... uh, go for Nina?"

  "Wait, what are we talking about? Your girlfriend or your interest in another woman?"

  Mills shifted again and said, "Well, both."

  Shit.

  "Fuck, Mills." I stood and sat next to my brother. "Let's deal with the first thing. Are you and Rebecca a thing or not?" I asked.

  "We took a break but I’m going to break her off completely," he answered.

  "You seem to be pretty set?" I acknowledged.

  "Yeah." He nodded with certainty.

  Holy shit.

  "You talk to J.D. about this?" I asked. "I ain't the one to give no advice about no fucking relationships. I'm not in one, not looking for one, can't keep one even if I wanted to."

  "Yeah but it's not even about you being in one, you were open to one," Mills clarified.

  "Who says?" My face had to be turned up in a confused ball.

  "Man, Nina has been around
at least twice and you look just like J.D. does when Tess is around. Possessive and eyes only for her. You haven't looked like that since..."

  I cut him off.

  "Shut the fuck up. You know the rule," I snapped and stood up to stretch my legs. "Off limits."

  "Even amongst family?" Mills stood up too. "We can't even talk about Lily amongst the family, Knox. What the fuck?"

  My eyes were stinging and my heart started to race faster as the palpitations began to make themselves known. I pointed to the door but nothing escaped my mouth.

  "Fuck that, Knox. It's been almost a decade. She's gone, okay. She's not coming back. Ever. How is that a failure for you?" Mills was in my face and I snapped.

  Pulling my arm back, I hit him and hit him hard.

  We were no strangers to fighting. Hell, my father raised four boys. We fought all the time but as we got older, we’d stopped that shit.

  Well, we had.

  After his initial shock, Mills tackled me against the wall and landed a few body shots to my ribs. I elbowed him a few times to get him off me but the bastard jerked his head up, effectively head butting me. Then the stocky punk picked me up and slammed me on the desk. By the time I went to kick him, some of my guys had pulled him and I apart from each other.

  My red-faced brother jerked his shoulders, effectively removing one hand from their grasp and pushed the other guy away before he sneered, "You really are a son of a bitch. You bitch about Pops but you're just like him. Hurt once, hurt forever. Fuck everybody else, huh? You don't deserve her."

  "Fuck you, bitch." I pointed as he stomped out of the small room. "Get off me."

  They let me go and after pacing around for a few minutes in an attempt to calm my ass down, I grabbed my shit and went to the bar. Four shots later, I was singing a different tune. No longer mad but horny as hell. The problem was - Nina wasn't talking to me and none of the loose ass in here would do. In my drunken state, I purchased a ticket and aimed to go to Kentucky.

  In that moment, it seemed like a good idea. Shit, even during the early morning plane ride, I was confidant until I reached the outside of the law firm. I didn't order flowers or even call her; I had just showed up.

  "Nina Parks here?" I entered the open office area.

  "Your name, sir?" the woman closest to me asked.

  "Knox Timms," I answered.

  She picked up the phone and called someone. After a few head nods and okays, she hung up the receiver and faced me.

  "Sir, Ms. Parks is not available." She smiled.

  "Well, I suggest she become available." My stance opened as I was prepared to turn this law firm upside down on its head.

  "No, sir. She can't see you." The woman stood up this time.

  "Listen, lady. Listen carefully, I just flew out here from Iowa and I'm telling you, she's going to fucking see me." I leaned towards her.

  "Sir," she said as she started waving her hands but I was trying to remember how I got to her the last time. "Sir..."

  I started for the elevator to the right and pressed the up button. A pitter-patter of heels followed me but I patiently waited, ignoring her words of protest.

  "Sir, I'm telling you, she can't see you because she's not here." The tanned woman looked flushed as she breathed deeply.

  My head swiveled towards her as I asked, "What do you mean, she's not here? When will she be back?"

  Her head moved from side-to-side, then as she opened her mouth to speak, the elevator opened. This action caused both of us to turn and see that dude who I took issue with before.

  "Ah, Mr. Timms, seems like you missed Nina." He smirked because it damn sure wasn't a smile.

  "Where is she?" I snarled for the simple fact that I did not like that motherfucker.

  "She's gone," he shrugged. "I'm assuming back to where she's from but ever since the dispute was settled and the County Commissioner renegotiated with another company, the county is again at rest. They've already started to do the work."

  My mind was moving at the speed of light. He didn't know where she was, the crisis had been averted and the county was safe. All of that and I simply wanted to know where she was.

  My hands grabbed my hair as I thought of all the times I had fucked up with this woman and even a drunken decision to come down here would not have brought her back. Mills' words came back to haunt me. I don't deserve her and didn't really deserve Lily. I had vowed to not think of her because she was dead to me. She didn't exist in my world anymore. I tried not to know about her and her life. The fact that she was living in California and was married to some ex-football player. Their kids, which should have been mine, were big and beautiful. She should have been mine, the married life, all of it, should have been mine.

  But no.

  She got up and left me just like Mom left Pops. No conversation, no discussion, just got the fuck out. I'd never hit, abused, mistreated or even threatened her. I thought we were in love and love would conquer all.

  It didn't.

  It wouldn't.

  It couldn't.

  My eyes blinked twice as the smirk from the man across from me faded. My shell must have dropped and he saw me for the broken man that I was and not the asshole who'd wipe the floor with him if he even acted like he wanted to tangle.

  Yes, it was evident because his next words floored me. "I'm almost positive, she's back in New York. However, she was thinking of moving permanently. I'm not sure where but she seems like a hard one to pin down."

  I took a step back, trying to gather my thoughts, grasp onto anything that I could come up with. What to do, how to do it, and when?

  "Fuck," I whispered.

  "Sir, are you alright?" The woman that stopped me at the front asked.

  "No. I'm fucked up." I looked at her, turned on my heels and left.

  Completely fucked up.

  Chapter Nine

  Nina:

  "What do you mean, you're leaving?" Tess plopped down on my office sofa. "I mean, you just got back here."

  She didn't know about the entire ordeal with Knox and I knew I should have told her but it was a little embarrassing. I mean, who does that?

  The man clearly had some fucked-up shit going on with him and I went ahead and meddled into his affairs. Not on purpose, but still. I did not want to deal with the emotions or even the aftermath of what had happened.

  "I guess what I'm looking for isn't here?" Was the only answer I felt like giving at that time.

  "Nina, is something wrong, honey? You don't seem like yourself." Tess' eyes squinted. "What's wrong with you? Are you pregnant?"

  That caused my head to tip back. "Really? Hell no, I'm not pregnant."

  She gave me the side eye but I kept my thoughts to myself.

  "You know, Nina." She sat back. "When I was having my issues with J.D., you were not only there but the voice of reason. You helped me to see what I couldn't, so I'm going to say this. You're not in this alone. You don't have to fight these battles by yourself. That goes for if you are with or without a man. You're private but I know you've been hurt badly. So, you have this laissez faire attitude about men. You take no one seriously and I get it. Believe me, I do. However, I want the best for you and if it's a man, so be it. If it's for you to live out your years as an old maid, then, so be it. What I want is for you to be happy." She paused. "The question you'll have to ask yourself is, if you are leaving because it will make you hapy or just don't want to deal with what you're running from. Answer that. Not to me but to yourself. Then make an informed decision."

  My friend stood up and left my office. Oh, she could be such a bitch sometimes by turning the tables on me. No, I was not fucking happy and yes, I was running.

  From what?

  From who?

  And more importantly, to where.

  If I had to be totally honest with myself, I wanted to start over. I did not want the failures of my past, including the short-lived ones to be in my face every day. I’d done well at LIT and my employer was very kind
to me. However, there was still something missing. Maybe there was always something missing but now it seemed that the hole was deeper than even I was comfortable with admitting. I was growing tired and what used to be fun, didn’t seem the same anymore.

  After arriving home and drinking two glasses of wine, my mind was whirling with all sorts of thoughts. They seemed like nightmares, which made me drink faster until I was calling Tess.

  “Come over,” I sobbed in the phone. “Please.”

  She asked no questions, just came over to my penthouse and I must have looked like hell on wheels because she pulled me into her arms and held me at the door.

  “It’s going to be okay,” she murmured. “Promise, it will.”

  I wasn’t convinced but I was glad I wasn’t alone.

  We finally made it to the couch where I just sat there staring off into space with Tess rubbing my back.

  “What’s happening?” she asked softly.

  “I just…” I couldn’t formulate my words. “I, uh…”

  “It’s me, honey. I can handle whatever you’re about to drop.” Tess encouraged me to share.

  Fuck, I knew she could but I was so fucked up. I wasn’t even ready to admit the shit to myself.

  “I saw my father with his mistress one day when I cut school. My mom was being fucked by some guy I’d never met in the kitchen one day. My parents fucking hated each other. I mean, after I graduated they literally divorced the next week and moved away. I’m almost certain they don’t talk to each other. To spend eighteen fucking years with someone you don’t even like, well that’s some fucked up shit, right?” I asked no one. “That has to be. It’s no wonder I’m so fucked up. Like, Tess. I’m the epitome of fucked up.”

  Tess held my hand tightly and after one slow exhale, she said, “I ain’t one to talk. I disowned my own father. You and I never discussed it but I’ve started to see a therapist. Now, we, J.D. and I, see one together. It’s helped us. Like, a lot.”

  Her hand kept sliding down my back despite the shit she was telling me. Tough as nails Tess and brooding ass J.D. seeing a therapist. They were the most solid couple I knew, but I guess maybe that helped them.