could I run into in a bathroom?
INT. THE GUYS' ROOM – DAY
Leon sits on his bed, a concerned expression as Edwin's voice resounds from the bathroom.
EDWIN (O.S.): Okay, let's get over the plan one more time. I'll block the big guy with an excuse on the way to the elevator. You'll jump at him from behind and plug his nose and mouth until he passes out for good. Then we'll hide him under something and bring him in a safe place, where we'll have all the time to gag him and tie him up like a salami! Everything clear?
By the look on Leon's face it clearly isn't.
LEON: Even assuming we could take out an almost 7 feet man by plugging his nose, he would recognize us anyway!
EDWIN (O.S.): That's why we're disguising ourselves!
The bathroom door opens, Edwin steps out in a tight red and white track cycling Swiss uniform.
LEON: Well, I don't know exactly where Switzerland is, but I'm not sure people's going to buy this.
EDWIN: Hey, it's the only uniform I could find. And no one will notice, anyway, I'm sure Switzerland is full of people like you and me!
HEIST MUSIC kicks in over his wide grin as we CUT TO:
INT. OLYMPIC VILLAGE – DESERT HALLWAY – DAY
Abebe stands by the snack dispenser, sticks a huge slew of coins into it. He pushes a button, keeps hold of a shopper to catch a cascade of cheap snacks.
As he moves away with his dinner EDWIN pops out from around the corner, Swiss uniform and a big pair of shades. He rushes to the stairway when --
MALE VOICE (O.S.): Look at that, it's Carnival time already!
Music dies as HUANG appears across the hallway, backed by his full team as he closes in with a big grin.
HUANG: Did you join a band of lollipops or did they invite you to a retarded party?
EDWIN: Excuse me but I really have no time now, could we talk about it later?
HUANG: No, let's talk right now. Alone, with no one to bother us.
EDWIN: Listen, why don't you leave me alone? We even let you win the tournament!
HUANG: Bullshit! I would have won anyway and you know it! I spent five hours in the bathroom after the final, I can barely sit down with three cushions under my butt! (Cracks his fingers) I say it is time to square things up once and for all.
INT. OLYMPIC VILLAGE – THREE FLOORS BELOW
Leon warily walks along a corridor, squeezed like a nut into a Swiss uniform half his size. He sneaks behind a life-size David Beckham standee, sets his eyes on the far end of the hallway.
LEON: Okay, just wait for the signal and down you go.
He puts on a streamlined helmet, looks down at his watch.
INT. OLYMPIC VILLAGE – ANOTHER CORRIDOR
Silence. Then a distant, muffled sound of quick footsteps and angry shouts, suddenly exploding like a thunder as Edwin bursts out from around the corner, chased by the whole Chinese table tennis team cursing in Mandarin.
HUANG: Stop, you son of a dog!
Edwin overturns a pair of chairs to slow down his chasers.
EDWIN: Won't you leave me alone, what the hell do you want from me?
HUANG: Stop!!
He throws with all his force a Pepsi can, which misses Edwin and lands with a big smack against a door across the hallway. A beat and from behind it appears HELGA, tangled hair and bloodshot eyes.
HELGA: Enough now! I haven't slept in thirty hours because of your fracas, now you're really going to get it!
Huang turns white as she takes off in pursuit, drops one of his teammates with a clog blow on his nape.
HUANG: Holy shit!
The Chinese men forget about Edwin, fly around the corner to beat it to the outside as Helga runs amok after them.
Edwin turns for the stairway, jumps down two flights of stairs to burst into ANOTHER HALLWAY. He stops, finally catches his breath.
EDWIN: Man, I'm having a stroke!
He's about to get moving when he spots TALITA stepping out of her room and walk head down in his direction. He goes to move out of her way when he notices she's been crying.
EDWIN: Talita...
She stops, quickly turns the other way.
EDWIN: Listen, I can't find a way to tell you how I'm sorry. I'm so ashamed of myself...
She keeps sobbing without turning.
EDWIN: Believe me, I didn't want to lie to you, you're the last person on heart to deserve that.
He tries to reach for her face but she turns around again.
EDWIN: I understand how you feel and you have all the right to think I --
RASHID (O.S.): Hey, what the hell do you want from my sister?
Edwin turns to see Talita's huge brother catching up with not the best of intentions.
EDWIN: Let's keep it calm, okay? I was just trying to clear me up with --
RASHID: My sister's got nothing to clear up with you, nor with anybody else!
TALITA: (still sobbing) We were just talking, Rashid.
RASHID: Well, you shouldn't. Now get back to your room, and quick.
Edwin is taken aback, then utterly shocked as he spots the red marks on Talita's cheek.
EDWIN: Hey, wait a second!
She runs to her room as Rashid gets right in Edwin's face.
RASHID: Hey, why don't you go take a swim and just leave her alone?
EDWIN: Okay, big boy, I don't care if you're her brother, you just made the biggest mistake of your life. (Rolls up his sleeves) Probably I'll end up in jail for all the pain I will give you, but I'm sure it will be worth it!
INT. DOWNSTAIRS
Leon stands behind the Beckham standee, shoots his watch another look.
LEON: Where the hell is him?
He's breathing hard and dripping sweat when DAEVON GOLD materializes at the end of the hallway.
LEON: Oh man...
UPSTAIRS
The sound of heavy knocks resonates across the desert hallway. A beat of silence, then another burst of bonks from inside a METALLIC LOCKER.
EDWIN (O.S.): Okay, buddy, you had your chance! I gave you thirty seconds to let me out of here, now I'm going to be really upset when I get out!
Another streak of knocks and nobody around to hear.
DOWNSTAIRS
Gold whistles absently as he walks toward Leon.
LEON: Oh man...
He's on the verge of an heartache, not the faintest idea of what to do, no sign of Edwin as Gold keeps closing in.
LEON: (under his voice) Oh man!
He holds his breath, bites his lip and BURSTS OUT from behind Beckham and... Gold has already passed him by!
LEON: Sheep!
Gold turns around as he keeps going, STUMBLES on the edge of a bench and falls down. As he stands back on his feet he HITS his nape against a fire extinguisher and drops senseless to the floor. Leon drops his mouth in awe.
LEON: Holy God in the peace of heaven!
He's completely shocked, almost in a trance as he lays a big Swiss flag over Gold. Grabs one of his feet and pulls hard, without moving him of an inch.
LEON: And there you go, I'm screwed!
He heaves a deep breath, gives it another try and the red and white flag magically starts sliding down the floor!
MALE VOICE (O.S.): Almost 7 feet and 200 pounds all by yourself...
As he keeps pulling the other foot KIDAL shakes his head at Leon.
KIDAL: ...and there I thought you were a pessimist!
LEON: Kidal?! What the hell are you doing here?
KIDAL: (drops down Gold's foot) Oh, if you can do it on your own I can even get out of the way!
LEON: No, I mean, I just didn't expect to see you!
KIDAL: Well, you can even be two idiots, but you're still my idiot friends. And anyhow, I would never have the money to come and visit you in jail here in England. (A glance around) Where is Edwin, anyway?
LEON: I don't know, but I know where we're going to be if we don't get lost right away!
They grab Gold's feet and resume pulling.
KIDAL: Where are we taking him?
LEON: To the only safe place in here... (nods at the elevator) the bathroom on the fifth floor!
HEIST MUSIC resumes...
INT. FIFTH FLOOR – DAY
...dies again as the sliding doors open on the HELLISH CROWD before the bathroom.
LEON: What the hell..?
He looks around in awe when a real Swiss girl, in a real Swiss uniform, steps into the elevator.
SWISS GIRL: (in Swiss, subtitled) There's a problem with the sewer pipes, seems like that's the only working bathroom in the building.
Leon and Kidal just stare at her as the girl glimpses at the bulging flag on the floor. Smiles at them and hits a button.
SECOND FLOOR
The elevator doors slide open, the girl winks at Kidal as she walks out.
SWISS GIRL: Guten Abend.
KIDAL: Guten Abend to you.
LEON: You can talk Swiss now?
KIDAL: My friend, mine is a universal language.
They step out the elevator, pull Gold right behind them when the ground starts to tremble.
MALE VOICE (O.S.): Hey guys, what's up?
Leon and Kidal bolt around to face RICARDO, looking puzzled at Leon's uniform.
RICARDO: What's that, you moved to mountaineering or did they hire you as astronauts?!
LEON: Well, it's a, huh, a really long story, you know?
KIDAL: Yeah, we had a party with the Swiss skating team, wild stuff going on, if you know what I mean!
Ricardo nods a sympathetic yes, then starts for the flag.
RICARDO: Alright, whatever it is under there just let me lend a hand.
LEON: No!!! (Off Ricardo's look) It's too heavy, we can't let you do that!
KIDAL: Sure, you could hurt yourself, or get a cramp, you know.
The 7 ft, 300 lbs giant frowns down at them.
LEON: We can make it on our own, don't worry about it.
KIDAL: How they say where we're from, we're thin but we're horned!
Leon keeps sweating as Ricardo cracks a smile, then slowly stomps away.
LEON: Thin but horned?!
KIDAL: Come on, hurry up, he could wake up any moment!
They're about to get moving when --
MALE VOICE
The Games Plan Page 12