by Renea Porter
“A few days ago, right before your mom came.”
“Can I see him?”
She smirks. “I thought you’d never ask.”
Bea shared her vision with me. The guy was stunning with hazel eyes with flecks of blue, dark chocolate colored hair and a stubbled jaw. He’s gorgeous and resembles someone, but I don’t know who.
“So you don’t have a name or anything?” I ask.
“Nope. I wish I knew. And Riley, I’m really sorry about everything you’ve been through. What are you going to do about Nathan?”
“I don’t know, Bea. I really don’t know. I’ll just figure it out after spring break.”
***
Bea and I spent two more days at Ace’s family’s cabin and did some fun activities. I managed to get my mind off things, deciding I’d deal with it when the time came.
Today is our first day back to school and I’m feeling more nervous than ever. Professor Murphy’s class is the last class I have, and I feel like a ball of nerves as I approach his class. Stopping outside of the door, I take a deep breath and enter. I don’t make eye contact until I’m seated in the center of the front row.
Pulling my subject book out, I set it on my desk and place my bag at my feet. Looking up, I’m met by Professor Murphy’s gaze. It’s intense and I shift in my seat uncomfortably.
“Riley, can you stay after class?” he asks.
I swallow and nod my head. The clock ticks by so slowly as the anticipation sets in. Did we really have a thing, together? Did I love him? Did he love me? Did he break my heart and make the pain so unbearable? These are the questions I don’t have the answers for. My memory resonates the words he spoke that day on the cliff. I didn’t do anything stupid as he requested, and he said he loved me.
Finally, after an agonizing hour of class, the others are excused and I remain seated as the students shuffle by me to leave. Then there is me and Nathan alone. He moves around his desk and leans against the front of it, his hands griping the edge. Well, shit, he’s hot. A smile plays across his face and I smile back shyly.
“How was spring break?”
“It was fine,” I say. “How was yours?”
“Eh, not too bad I guess.”
I stand and slowly walk toward him. His eyes scan me from head to toe and back up. My skirt brushes against my thighs.
“Why don’t we skip the chit chat and you tell me why you asked me to stay after?” I say in my sultry voice.
Whatever is happening here, I’m really attracted to him. There is a strong force between us, and I just want to let go and seduce him right here, right now. But I can’t. There are too many unanswered questions that I need answers to.
“Are you free later? I’d like the chance to explain things to you,” he says.
“Um. Yes. I’m free,” I say playfully.
“Can you come over at seven?”
“I’ll be there,” I say smiling. Bending down, I retrieve my bag, put my book inside, and leave the classroom and head home.
I meet Bea in the kitchen. I didn’t see her all day.
“How’d your day go? Never mind. How’d it go with Nathan?”
“I’m heading to his place in a few short hours. I still have to deal with my mother, though,” I tell her.
“Umm, I’m not sure you want to go messing with her. She’s pretty powerful. I’d give it a day or so. Let things simmer down.”
“You’re probably right. She’s probably going to come after me. Which is all the more reason I need to meet with Nathan tonight. He has the answers. You filled me in on a lot, but I need to hear his point of view.”
“No, I get it. You are so strong, Riley, in every sense of the word. I don’t know if I could be that strong. You’ve dealt with a lot and I wasn’t here for some of it. You can hold your own, and you can own that.”
“I love you, Bea.” I move to hug her tight.
“I love you. Now you need to go get ready for your date.” She shoves me.
“It’s not a date.”
“Whatever you say.” She smiles.
Making my way upstairs, I decide to leave my skirt and my T-shirt on. I brush my hair and freshen up my makeup then I settle on my bed with a book I’ve been dying to read, until it’s time to see Nathan. I assume he plans on feeding me, or devouring me based on the look he was giving me earlier.
***
Seven P.M rolls around rather quickly and I say bye to Bea as I’m leaving. She says she won’t be waiting up, but I just shake my head at her and head across the street.
Isn’t he afraid someone will see me coming over? I am his student after all.
Pushing that thought aside, I knock on his door and he immediately answers and a wave of deja vu comes over me, but it all still seems unfamiliar territory. It’s a weird feeling.
“I hope you don’t mind having pizza.”
“No, pizza is great,” I say.
We make our way to the living room; the pizza is on the coffee table.
“It was just delivered, so it’s still fresh.” He sits on the couch and hands me a paper plate.
Taking the plate from him, I sit next to him and grab a slice and immediately take a bite. He turns and faces me.
“I’ve been doing a lot of thinking and trying to process everything. I’m guessing you have the answers,” I tell him.
He sighs. “First off, I want to say there hasn’t been a day that’s gone by that I haven’t thought about you. We had something special and I fucked up, royally.”
“Why don’t you start from the beginning, because I don’t remember anything? My mom erased any memory I had of you. I know there is something between us. I felt it earlier and I feel it right now.”
He finishes his slice of pizza and washes it down with some soda. “We did have something. Hell, it was magical in every sense of the word. After a few short weeks of being together, I broke it off because the school board doesn’t allow professors to have relationships with students, and at the time, I was worried about getting fired. I know I broke your heart into a million pieces; it fucking destroyed me, Riley, to do that to you, to us.”
His words feel sincere, and I feel it deep in my core. I believe him, because the pain in his face is almost too much to watch. I take a sip of my soda and continue to listen to him.
“The worst part about all this is that your mom let you believe I was bad and that we don’t belong together and that I just want your magic. That is not the case. I’d give you all my powers right this second to prove it to you. The truth is your mom is dark and she wants your powers for herself. I’m sorry.”
He stops momentarily to take another bite of pizza, and I can’t help myself from staring at him. Then he continues telling me about him being immortal, and how he moves around every so often because he doesn’t age. He says he has an older brother and it’s just the two of them. His name is Alex and he wants me to meet him sometime.
“Riley, if you say the word, I can bring the memories back, our memories, the ones your mom erased.”
I lean into Nathan, place my hand on his chest and touch his lips with mine. My heart skips a beat as his tongue invades my mouth and I greedily invite it in. After a few moments I pull away and my eyes flutter back open. I think I could get drunk off him.
“I just wanted to taste your lips for the first time again. Now you can bring my memories back, as long as it’s not painful.”
“It’s not painful. And it doesn’t take long. I understand if you need to step back and think about everything that I’ve said.”
“I don’t need to think. I’m tired of just thinking.”
“Okay, come here,” he says, pulling me closer to him.
We sit face to face, and he places his finger tips to my temples and I close my eyes. It’s like a movie playing in my head, as I see everything that we’ve done between talking, laughing, eating, and making love, and me teasing him on several occasions. I even see moments I wouldn’t normally see even with my eyes o
pen, like him stroking my hair as I slept next to him, or him watching me get dressed and all I see in his eyes is love. The magic we share surrounds us, as everything comes back to my memories.
Why on God’s creation would I want to forget these memories? The visual of him breaking my heart comes to my mind, playing over the heartbreak that I once felt. Even now, seeing the pain on my face stings. He did what he thought was right. I watch as I walk out his door, heartbroken and crushed for the first time in my life, and Nathan slams a glass against the wall, pained by the hurt he caused me. He got wasted that night and my heart breaks for him, as well.
I guess I wouldn’t want those memories, those are heartbreaking. But the thing about feeling pain, whether it’s heartbreak, receiving bad news, or just having a lot of bad days is you come out stronger for surviving that. And I believe I am survivor. Sometimes life is just shit, but it’s the good things that happen that make everything worth it, and I believe Nathan is worth it. What we have or had shared, it’s so worth it. I felt it in the kiss we shared moments ago.
Nathan releases his fingers from my temples.
“I saw it all. And I believe you. Thank you for not giving up on us,” I tell him.
“I’d never give up on us. I’m prepared to show you just how much I love you, how much I need you in my life, and magic has nothing to do with it.”
Chapter Seventeen
RILEY
“So if I wanted to be immortal like you, you can do that, too?”
“Yes. If you want us to have the bond we once shared, we might as well do it the official way.”
“Tell me more,” I say.
“Well, it’s a whole process that includes us visiting the most special place on earth, us saying vows, among other things.” He winks.
“So it’s kind of like getting married?”
“Exactly. Once that bond is in place, it can never be broken by us or anyone else. It’s forever. So it’s something you should think about before committing to it. If it is something that you want, then its three days we spend at the most beautiful place you’ve ever seen. It’s a process.”
“I know I am meant to be with you. Nothing can erase that. So I do want to make the bond between us permanent. I want to be with you, Nathan, that much is clear. I don’t need to think about it any further.”
A smile crept up on his face. He reaches his arms out and hugs me tightly.
“I’m so glad. I feel like the luckiest man alive. I’ll make the plans and get it set up. How soon do you want to leave?”
“As soon as possible.”
“Okay, great.”
With that, I bid Nathan goodnight.
After Nathan replaced my memories, we talked and caught up on everything we missed out on and surprisingly finished the pizza off. As much as I wanted to continue our relationship right where we left off, I know things don’t work like that. I still need to let Ace know that I appreciate his friendship, but that is all that it will ever be between us. I feel like I should at least tell him before I move on with Nathan.
It’s late when I finally get home, and Bea kept true to her word about not waiting up. Dragging myself upstairs, I take a quick shower and head to bed. Lying in bed, I go over everything Nathan told me, and it all coincides with what Bea was able to tell me. I’m willing to give us another shot; it’s all I’ve got. Not many people get second chances and we get ours. Even in my own company the memories plague through my mind.
Then there is still my mom to deal with and I know I’ll deal with her soon. I can feel her near. And I wonder what kind of crap she is putting my dad through. Maybe I don’t know as much as I thought about them.
***
Waking up early for school, I text Ace to meet me at the entrance of the main building. I settle in the kitchen to eat breakfast and Bea comes in.
“What’s the worried look about?”
“Good morning to you, too. I just text Ace. After meeting with Nathan last night, I feel like Ace should know my heart belongs with someone else.”
She comes over and rubs my shoulder. “That’s the breaks. His poor heart, though.”
“Trust me, I feel like shit. Maybe we should cast a spell so he doesn’t have to feel so protective over me. Who knows, maybe my mom set this whole thing in motion. He deserves something better than looking after me and not getting anything in return.”
“You might be on to something,” Bea confirms.
“I’ll give it a shot. Speaking of shots, Nathan and I are working things out and we are taking an extreme measure to put our bond back together. I love him, Bea. I know that with everything that I am.”
“I’m so excited for you both. So he brought your memories back?”
I smile. “He did. That’s how I know I love him and that we are meant to be. We are going away for a few days to put the bond in place, because I can’t imagine a life without him by my side. Are you up for dress shopping later?”
“Most definitely,” she says with excitement in her voice.
“Well, first I have to meet Ace.”
“Good luck.”
Grabbing my bag, I head off to meet Ace. I dread the conversation. As I walk and he comes into my view, I start casting the spell, so he no longer feels the need to be my protector. No matter what, he will always remain a dear friend to me and that will never change. The spell is much like a bond spell, but less invasive and hardly even noticeable. By the time I get to him, the spell is done and I greet him with a smile.
“Shall we sit?” I point to a bench off to the side.
“Sure.”
Setting my bag at my feet, I turn to face him. “You know, we have some sort of special bond between us.”
He nods.
“I just wanted to tell you in person…”
He interrupts me. “You are going back to him, aren’t you?”
I take his hand in mine and I look down at the ground before looking back up. “I am. I have to give him another chance. There are things that are too complicated to go into right now, but I need you to trust me. My heart belongs to him. You deserved to know in person.”
“I understand. You found the one you are supposed to be with and I am happy for you. I just hope I can be that lucky one day.”
“You will be. You have so much going for you, and there is someone out there that deserves you way more than I do.”
“Well, you know if you ever, ever need anything…”
I interrupt. “I know.” I smile and give his hand a squeeze. I do love Ace, but in a sibling type of way. I tried to feel more, but it just wasn’t there. Maybe casting the spell was wrong, but I had to do it. It felt like the right thing to do. I can’t have Ace and Nathan fighting over who is going to protect me when or if that time comes. I’m going to trust that Nathan will, like he promised.
“Let me walk you to class,” he says, standing.
I smile at him and how genuine he is. He’s selfless and he cares about me. And he is very understanding. Breaking the hold he felt over me was probably the right thing to do. A sense of peace washes over me.
***
“How’d Ace take the news?” Bea asks as I walk in the door from class.
“Pretty good, I think. I did an unprotected spell as I was walking toward him, and I think it worked. At least, we’ll see if it did.” I giggle. “So you want to grab a bite and go dress shopping?”
“I’m ready.”
Normally, Bea and I walk everywhere, but since dress shopping is in order, she is pulling her steady car out of the parking spot. We make a quick stop for food going through a drive thru of a popular food chain, and eat in the car as we make our way to a trendy dress shop called Duchess on Dutch Rd. I mean if that’s not fate, I don’t know what is.
Bea pulls into a parking spot in front of the shop and the store window is lined with all kinds of dresses. I’m on a mission for something specific and unique.
“Welcome to Duchess. What can I help you ladies with?”
> “Hi, I’m looking for something white, short, and with lace, lots of lace,” I tell her.
“Right this way,” the consultant says.
Among the sea of white in every length and all variations of white, she leads up to a rack with short dresses. She pulls a few off the rack, and we immediately get started in the dressing room while Bea patiently waits for me to model each one.
The first one I try on is a little awkward, with more length in the back and shorter in the front, and there is a deep V dip from the neck down. After showing Bea, we both agree it’s too much. I need something classic and sexy at the same time. The second dress fits so perfect like it was made for me. It’s long sleeved with nothing but lace on the sleeves with some areas that are see-through. The rest of the lace is over an all-white satin material; it hits right at mid-thigh and is simple but sexy. The front reaches up all the way up to my neck while the back of the dress dips down, showing most of my bare back. Happily, I step out of the dressing room to show Bea.
Bea gasps. “Oh my god, Riley, you look stunning in that. You will knock Nathan right out with that dress.” She claps excitedly.
I beam, knowing this is the dress and I didn’t have to spend hours looking for it. With my credit card in hand, I happily pay for the dress.
“Oh my god, you looked so beautiful, Riley,” Bea says as we walk down the sidewalk to the shoe store, because you can’t have a new dress without new shoes.
Inside the shoe store, we scan the array of shoes. “I want a little hint of color with the shoes, but nothing too bright,” I tell Bea.
Scanning the racks of shoes, nothing sparks my interest. But just as I’m about to give up, Bea holds up a pair. “How about these?”
“Oh my god, yes.” They are perfect and light yellow, a perfect pale yellow. I slip my feet inside them and they fit perfectly. They are three inch heels with a peep toe and a bow across the front.
“Those will be gorgeous with the dress,” she confirms.
After purchasing the shoes, Bea insists on splurging us with manicures and pedicures. I could use some royal treatment.