ROSE He won’t be long.
MR KIDD No, of course not. Shouldn’t take him long.
ROSE No.
MR KIDD Well then, I’ll pop off. Have a good run, Mr Hudd. Mind how you go. It’ll be dark soon too. But not for a good while yet. Arrivederci.
He exits.
ROSE I don’t believe he had a sister, ever.
She takes the plate and cup to the sink. BERT pushes his chair back and rises.
All right. Wait a minute. Where’s your jersey?
She brings the jersey from the bed.
Here you are. Take your coat off. Get into it.
She helps him into his jersey.
Right. Where’s your muffler?
She brings a muffler from the bed.
Here you are. Wrap it round. That’s it. Don’t go too fast, Bert, will you? I’ll have some cocoa on when you get back. You won’t be long. Wait a minute. Where’s your overcoat? You’d better put on your overcoat.
He fixes his muffler, goes to the door and exits. She stands, watching the door, then turns slowly to the table, picks up the magazine, and puts it down. She stands and listens, goes to the fire, bends, lights the fire and warms her hands. She stands and looks about the room. She looks at the window and listens, goes quickly to the window, stops and straightens the curtain. She comes to the centre of the room, and looks towards the door. She goes to the bed, puts on a shawl, goes to the sink, takes a bin from under the sink, goes to the door and opens it.
ROSE Oh!
MR and MRS SANDS are disclosed on the landing.
MRS SANDS So sorry. We didn’t mean to be standing here, like. Didn’t mean to give you a fright. We’ve just come up the stairs.
ROSE That’s all right.
MRS SANDS This is Mr Sands. I’m Mrs Sands.
ROSE How do you do?
MR SANDS grunts acknowledgement.
MRS SANDS We were just going up the stairs. But you can’t see a thing in this place. Can you, Toddy?
MR SANDS Not a thing.
ROSE What were you looking for?
MRS SANDS The man who runs the house.
MR SANDS The landlord. We’re trying to get hold of the landlord.
MRS SANDS What’s his name, Toddy?
ROSE His name’s Mr Kidd.
MRS SANDS Kidd, Was that the name, Toddy?
MR SANDS Kidd? No, that’s not it.
ROSE Mr Kidd. That’s his name.
MR SANDS Well, that’s not the bloke we’re looking for.
ROSE Well, you must be looking for someone else.
Pause.
MR SANDS I suppose we must be.
ROSE You look cold.
MRS SANDS It’s murder out. Have you been out?
ROSE No.
MRS SANDS We’ve not long come in.
ROSE Well, come inside, if you like, and have a warm.
They come into the centre of the room.
(Bringing the chair from the table to the fire.) Sit down here. You can get a good warn.
MRS SANDS Thanks. (She sits.)
ROSE Come over by the fire, Mr. Sands.
MR SANDS No, it’s all right. I’ll just stretch my legs.
MRS SANDS Why? You haven’t been sitting down.
MR SANDS What about it?
MRS SANDS Well, why don’t you sit down?
MR SANDS Why should I?
MRS SANDS You must be cold.
MR SANDS I’m not.
MRS SANDS You must be. Bring over a chair and sit down.
MR SANDS I’m all right standing up, thanks.
MRS SANDS You don’t look one thing or the other standing up.
MR SANDS I’m quite all right, Clarissa.
ROSE Clarissa? What a pretty name.
MRS SANDS Yes, it is nice, isn’t it? My father and mother gave it to me.
Pause.
You know, this is a room you can sit down and feel cosy in.
MR SANDS (looking at the room) It’s a fair size, all right.
MRS SANDS Why don’t you sit down, Mrs –
ROSE Hudd. No thanks.
MR SANDS What did you say?
ROSE When?
MR SANDS What did you say the name was?
ROSE Hudd.
MR SANDS That’s it. You’re the wife of the bloke you mentioned then?
MRS SANDS No, she isn’t. That was Mr Kidd.
MR SANDS Was it? I thought it was Hudd.
MRS SANDS No, it was Kidd. Wasn’t it, Mrs Hudd?
ROSE That’s right. The landlord.
MRS SANDS No, not the landlord. The other man.
ROSE Well, that’s his name. He’s the landlord.
MR SANDS Who?
ROSE Mr Kidd.
Pause.
MR SANDS Is he?
MRS SANDS Maybe there are two landlords.
Pause.
MR SANDS That’ll be the day.
MRS SANDS What did you say?
MR SANDS I said that’ll be the day.
Pause.
ROSE What’s it like out?
MRS SANDS It’s very dark out.
MR SANDS No darker than in.
MRS SANDS He’s right there.
MR SANDS It’s darker in than out, for my money.
MRS SANDS There’s not much light in this place, is there, Mrs Hudd? Do you know, this is the first bit of light we’ve seen since we came in?
MR SANDS The first crack.
ROSE I never go out at night. We stay in.
MRS SANDS Now I come to think of it, I saw a star.
MR SANDS You saw what?
MRS SANDS Well, I think I did.
MR SANDS You think you saw what?
MRS SANDS A star.
MR SANDS Where?
MRS SANDS In the sky.
MR SANDS When?
MRS SANDS As we were coming along.
MR SANDS Go home.
MRS SANDS What do you mean?
MR SANDS You didn’t see a star.
MRS SANDS Why not?
MR SANDS Because I’m telling you. I’m telling you you didn’t see a star.
Pause.
ROSE I hope it’s not too dark out. I hope it’s not too icy. My husband’s in his van. He doesn’t drive slow either. He never drives slow.
MR SANDS (guffawing) Well, he’s taking a big chance tonight then.
ROSE What?
MR SANDS No – I mean, it’d be a bit dodgy driving tonight.
ROSE He’s a very good driver.
Pause.
How long have you been here?
MRS SANDS I don’t know. How long have we been here, Toddy?
MR SANDS About half an hour.
MRS SANDS Longer than that, much longer.
MR SANDS About thirty-five minutes.
ROSE Well, I think you’ll find Mr Kidd about somewhere. He’s not long gone to make his tea.
MR SANDS He lives here, does he?
ROSE Of course he lives here.
MR SANDS And you say he’s the landlord, is he?
ROSE Of course he is.
MR SANDS Well, say I wanted to get hold of him, where would I find him?
ROSE Well – I’m not sure.
MR SANDS He lives here, does he?
ROSE Yes, but I don’t know –
MR SANDS You don’t know exactly where he hangs out?
ROSE No, not exactly.
MR SANDS But he does live here, doesn’t he?
Pause.
MRS SANDS This is a very big house, Toddy.
MR SANDS Yes, I know it is. But Mrs Hudd seems to know Mr Kidd very well.
ROSE No, I wouldn’t say that. As a matter of fact, I don’t know him at all. We’re very quiet. We keep ourselves to ourselves. I never interfere. I mean, why should I? We’ve got our room. We don’t bother anyone else. That’s the way it should be.
MRS SANDS It’s a nice house, isn’t it? Roomy.
ROSE I don’t know about the house. We’re all right, but I wouldn’t mind betting there’s a lot
wrong with this house.
She sits in the rocking-chair.
I think there’s a lot of damp.
MRS SANDS Yes, I felt a bit of damp when we were in the basement just now.
ROSE You were in the basement?
MRS SANDS Yes, we went down there when we came in.
ROSE Why?
MRS SANDS We were looking for the landlord.
ROSE What was it like down there?
MR SANDS Couldn’t see a thing.
ROSE Why not?
MR SANDS There wasn’t any light.
ROSE But what was – you said it was damp?
MRS SANDS I felt a bit, didn’t you, Tod?
MR SANDS Why? Haven’t you ever been down there, Mrs Hudd?
ROSE Oh yes, once, a long time ago.
MR SANDS Well, you know what it’s like then, don’t you?
ROSE It was a long time ago
MR SANDS You haven’t been here all that long, have you?
ROSE I was just wondering whether anyone was living down there now.
MRS SANDS Yes. A man.
ROSE A man?
MRS SANDS Yes.
ROSE One man?
MR SANDS Yes, there was a bloke down there, all right.
He perches on the table.
MRS SANDS You’re sitting down!
MR SANDS (jumping up) Who is?
MRS SANDS You were.
MR SANDS Don’t be silly. I perched.
MRS SANDS I saw you sit down.
MR SANDS You did not see me sit down because I did not sit bloody well down. I perched!
MRS SANDS Do you think I can’t perceive when someone’s sitting down?
MR SANDS Perceive! That’s all you do. Perceive.
MRS SANDS You could do with a bit more of that instead of all that tripe you get up to.
MR SANDS You don’t mind some of that tripe!
MRS SANDS You take after your uncle, that’s who you take after!
MR SANDS And who do you take after?
MRS SANDS (rising) I didn’t bring you into the world.
MR SANDS You didn’t what?
MRS SANDS I said, I didn’t bring you into the world.
MR SANDS Well, who did then? That’s what I want to know. Who did? Who did bring me into the world?
She sits, muttering. He stands, muttering.
ROSE You say you saw a man downstairs, in the basement?
MRS SANDS Yes, Mrs Hudd, you see, the thing is, Mrs Hudd, we’d heard they’d got a room to let here, so we thought we’d come along and have a look. Because we’re looking for a place, you see, somewhere quiet, and we knew this district was quiet, and we passed the house a few months ago and we thought it looked very nice, but we thought we’d call of an evening, to catch the landlord, so we came along this evening. Well, when we got here we walked in the front door and it was very dark in the hall and there wasn’t anyone about. So we went down to the basement. Well, we got down there only due to Toddy having such good eyesight really. Between you and me, I didn’t like the look of it much, I mean the feel, we couldn’t make much out, it smelt damp to me. Anyway, we went through a kind of partition, then there was another partition, and we couldn’t see where we were going, well, it seemed to me it got darker the more we went, the further we went in, I thought we must have come to the wrong house. So I stopped. And Toddy stopped. And then this voice said, this voice came – it said – well, it gave me a bit of a fright, I don’t know about Tod, but someone asked if he could do anything for us. So Tod said we were looking for the land lord and this man said the landlord would be upstairs. Then Tod asked was there a room vacant. And this man, this voice really, I think he was behind the partition, said yes there was a room vacant. He was very polite, I thought, but we never saw him, I don’t know why they never put a light on. Any way, we got out then and we came up and we went to the top of the house. I don’t know whether it was the top. There was a door locked on the stairs, so there might have been another floor, but we didn’t see anyone, and it was dark, and we were just coming down again when you opened your door.
ROSE YOU said you were going up.
MRS SANDS What?
ROSE YOU said you were going up before.
MRS SANDS No, we were coming down.
ROSE YOU didn’t say that before.
MRS SANDS We’d been up.
MR SANDS We’d been up. We were coming down.
Pause.
ROSE This man, what was he like, was he old?
MRS SANDS We didn’t see him.
ROSE Was he old?
Pause.
MR SANDS Well, we’d better try to get hold of this landlord, if he’s about.
ROSE You won’t find any rooms vacant in this house.
MR SANDS Why not?
ROSE Mr Kidd told me. He told me.
MR SANDS Mr Kidd?
ROSE He told me he was full up.
MR SANDS The man in the basement said there was one. One room. Number seven he said.
Pause.
ROSE That’s this room.
MR SANDS We’d better go and get hold of the landlord.
MRS SANDS (rising) Well, thank you for the warm-up, Mrs Hudd. I feel better now.
ROSE This room is occupied.
MR SANDS Come on.
MRS SANDS Goodnight, Mrs Hudd. I hope your husband won’t be too long. Must be lonely for you, being all alone here.
MR SANDS Come on.
They go out. ROSE watches the door close, starts towards it, and stops. She takes the chair back to the table, picks up the magazine, looks at it, and puts it down. She goes to the rocking-chair, sits, rocks, stops, and sits still. There is a sharp knock at the door, which opens. Enter MR KIDD.
MR KIDD I came straight in.
ROSE Mr Kidd! I was just going to find you. I’ve got to speak to you.
MR KIDD Look here, Mrs Hudd, I’ve got to speak to you. I came up specially.
ROSE There were two people in here just now. They said this room was going vacant. What were they talking about?
MR KIDD As soon as I heard the van go I got ready to come and see you. I’m knocked out.
ROSE What was it all about? Did you see those people? How can this room be going? It’s occupied. Did they get hold of you, Mr Kidd?
MR KIDD Get hold of me? Who?
ROSE I told you. Two people. They were looking for the landlord.
MR KIDD I’m just telling you. I’ve been getting ready to come and see you, as soon as I heard the van go.
ROSE Well then, who were they?
MR KIDD That’s why I came up before. But he hadn’t gone yet. I’ve been waiting for him to go the whole weekend.
ROSE Mr Kidd, what did they mean about this room?
MR KIDD What room?
ROSE Is this room vacant?
MR KIDD Vacant?
ROSE They were looking for the landlord.
MR KIDD Who were?
ROSE Listen, Mr Kidd, you are the landlord, aren’t you? There isn’t any other landlord?
MR KIDD What? What’s that got to do with it? I don’t know what you’re talking about. I’ve got to tell you, that’s all. I’ve got to tell you. I’ve had a terrible weekend. You’ll have to see him. I can’t take it any more. You’ve got to see him.
Pause.
ROSE Who?
MR KIDD The man. He’s been waiting to see you. He wants to see you. I can’t get rid of him. I’m not a young man, Mrs Hudd, that’s apparent. It’s apparent. You’ve got to see him.
ROSE See who?
MR KIDD The man. He’s downstairs now. He’s been there the whole weekend. He said that when Mr Hudd went out I was to tell him. That’s why I came up before. But he hadn’t gone yet. So I told him. I said he hasn’t gone yet. I said, well when he goes, I said, you can go up, go up, have done with it. No, he says, you must ask her if she’ll see me. So I came up again, to ask you if you’ll see him.
ROSE Who is he?
MR KIDD How do I know who he is?
All I know is he won’t say a word, he won’t indulge in any conversation, just – has he gone? That and nothing else. He wouldn’t even play a game of chess. All right, I said, the other night, while we’re waiting I’ll play you a game of chess. You play chess, don’t you? I tell you, Mrs Hudd, I don’t know if he even heard what I was saying. He just lies there. It’s not good for me. He just lies there, that’s all, waiting.
ROSE He lies there, in the basement?
MR KIDD Shall I tell him it’s all right, Mrs Hudd?
ROSE But it’s damp down there.
MR KIDD Shall I tell him it’s all right?
ROSE That what’s all right?
MR KIDD That you’ll see him.
ROSE See him? I beg your pardon, Mr Kidd. I don’t know him. Why should I see him?
MR KIDD You won’t see him?
ROSE Do you expect me to see someone I don’t know? With my husband not here too?
MR KIDD But he knows you, Mrs Hudd, he knows you.
ROSE How could he, Mr Kidd, when I don’t know him?
MR KIDD You must know him.
ROSE But I don’t know anybody. We’re quiet here. We’ve just moved into this district.
MR KIDD But he doesn’t come from this district. Perhaps you knew him in another district.
ROSE Mr Kidd, do you think I go around knowing men in one district after another? What do you think I am?
MR KIDD I don’t know what I think.
He sits.
I think I’m going off my squiff.
ROSE You need rest. An old man like you. What you need is rest.
MR KIDD He hasn’t given me any rest. Just lying there. In the black dark. Hour after hour. Why don’t you leave me be, both of you? Mrs Hudd, have a bit of pity. Please see him. Why don’t you see him?
ROSE I don’t know him.
MR KIDD You can never tell. You might know him.
ROSE I don’t know him.
MR KIDD (rising) I don’t know what’ll happen if you don’t see him.
ROSE I’ve told you I don’t know this man!
MR KIDD I know what he’ll do. I know what he’ll do. If you don’t see him now, there’ll be nothing else for it, he’ll come up on his own bat, when your husband’s here, that’s what he’ll do. He’ll come up when Mr Hudd’s here, when your husband’s here.
The Short Plays of Harold Pinter Page 2