Ben stood up, a slight smirk on his handsome face. ‘Yeah. I’m not really in the mood for this.’
Luca stared him out through narrowed eyes, laughing quietly. ‘Shit. And I thought you were gonna be fun.’
‘I don’t need this.’ Ben tossed his cigarette onto the ground, leaving it to smoulder.
Luca watched as he walked away, climbed onto his bike and sped off. ‘Something I said?’ he mumbled under his breath, turning to walk back towards the clubhouse.
‘Everything all right there?’
Luca looked up as Kip fell into step beside him. ‘Everything’s fine.’
‘Any idea where he’s off to?’ Kip asked, jerking his head in the direction of a departing Ben.
‘He wasn’t really in the mood for conversation. Why you so interested anyway?’
‘Just wondered if Coby’s plan had kicked into action yet, that’s all. Thought he might be heading off to see his father.’
Luca stopped walking, looking over at the clubhouse. Mia and Lexi were sitting outside, deep in conversation. ‘Do they know anything yet? About what’s going on?’
Kip shrugged. ‘No idea. Not sure what Coby’s told them. He probably thinks it’s best to keep them in the dark for as long as we can, given that we’re dealing with Shane, and that Ben’s the one trying to help flush him out.’
Luca eyed Kip with a wary expression. ‘You still don’t trust him much, do you? Ben, I mean.’
‘Something just doesn’t feel right, Luc. And after everything Mia’s been through…’
‘You sure this isn’t all because you’ve still got feelings for her? I know she’s your sister and all, but you’re still getting used to that bombshell, aren’t you?’
‘It’s not that.’ Kip watched as Lexi said something to Mia, which caused both of them to laugh out loud.
‘You sure?’
‘I’m not in love with my fucking sister, Luc.’ But only because the law told him he couldn’t be; because he had no other choice.
Luca followed Kip’s gaze. ‘You’re not gonna do anything stupid, are you?’
‘Like what?’ He was finding it hard to keep the agitation out of his voice now.
‘I dunno.’ Luca shrugged. ‘But if I were you, I’d be throwing all my attention in Cat’s direction instead of worrying about Mia. She can look after herself. She doesn’t need a babysitter. You coming inside?’
‘Yeah. In a minute.’
Luca’s expression carried more than a hint of warning, but he offered up no comment before disappearing inside the clubhouse.
Kip leaned back against the wall, his head down, the sound of Mia’s laughter still ringing out around the yard. She’d be better off without a man like Ben Salter – a man who, right now, was probably in more danger than he realized.
A smile spread slowly across Kip’s face.
He didn’t feel one ounce of guilt about that.
Nine
Ben pulled up outside the house he hadn’t been anywhere near in over five years. And he felt nothing – no regret, no guilt; no fear. He’d done a good job closing down every emotion it would be dangerous to feel right now.
Climbing off his bike he leaned back against it, folding his arms, taking another look at the house. It still looked the same, but his father never had been the house proud type. After his mother had left, Hector had spent most of his time at the Dark Angels’ clubhouse leaving Ben and his brother and sister in the care of various “aunts”. It hadn’t been the most conventional of upbringings, so it was only natural they’d all gravitated towards the club and that sometimes twisted sense of family it could give you – another reason why his mother had never returned; never come back to “save” her kids from that life she’d hated so much. And that was something that had never really left Ben; something that had always stayed with him. Something that had fuelled the hate? Stoked the anger he’d directed at the world back then?
Running both hands over his head he took a deep breath before making his way up the path to the front door. Another deep breath. He needed one more second, just a second to get his head exactly where he needed it to be. Then one sharp rap on the dirty white door.
He heard footsteps from inside, the sound of several dogs barking coming from the back yard. But all he felt was an overwhelming strength. So when the door flew open, and his father stood there in front of him, all jet-black hair and unkempt goatee beard, a cigarette hanging from the corner of his mouth, Ben was ready. For whatever this turned out to be.
Hector said nothing; he just stood aside to allow Ben through, closing the door behind them.
‘You came.’ When he did finally speak, his voice was, as usual, devoid of emotion, his eyes empty.
Ben stared at his father, looking him slowly up and down from his old, battered boots to his well-worn cut, his hair pulled back into a long ponytail. ‘Not because you summoned me. I’d like to get that straight.’
Hector chuckled quietly, blowing smoke into the air. The living room smelt of stale cigarettes and alcohol with just a hint of dog. It almost made Ben gag. Was this really the way his father lived now? ‘I have a cleaner,’ Hector said, not missing Ben’s reaction to the state of the house. ‘She comes twice a week. Tomorrow’s one of her days. Not sure how I’d manage without her.’
Ben looked around him, taking in the old couch he remembered, although there were two new chairs now at either end of the living room. The TV was new, too, a way-too-large-for-the-size-of-the-room flat-screen on the wall opposite the couch. It was playing a football game, the sound muted. And the carpet had been ripped up since Ben had last been here, leaving exposed wooden floorboards that had yet to be treated.
‘There are things we need to talk about, Benjamin.’
Ben’s head shot back around to face his father, their eyes locking.
‘We need to deal with this – “situation” that’s been hanging over our heads for too long now.’
Ben’s eyes narrowed. He felt numb, but that’s how he needed to feel. He had a job to do, and no matter how much it pained him to do this, it made sense, in a warped kind of way. Keep your enemies closer, isn’t that what they said?
‘You know that coming back here – you know that was a mistake, don’t you?’
‘It wasn’t the only mistake.’ Ben kept his eyes locked firmly on his father’s, silently battering down the wave of nausea that had suddenly overcome him.
Hector raised an eyebrow, waiting for Ben to enlighten him.
‘Joining the Lone Riders… that was a mistake.’
Hector laughed, a deep, quiet chuckle that, somehow, only served to fuel Ben’s anger at this man who’d fucked up his life in every way possible. ‘What is this, Benjamin? You come running to me because you’ve suddenly seen the error of your ways?’
‘I fell in love…’
‘Ah, the beautiful Mia Rose. Yes. I can see why you may have been swayed into making such rash decisions as the ones you’ve made recently.’
Ben’s eyes narrowed further, that anger building, and it was taking energy he knew he needed to preserve to keep it down. ‘You leave Mia out of this, you hear me?’
‘Oh, come on, Benjamin. I wouldn’t do anything as crass as using a woman to get back at you.’
‘All this shit between us… it needs to end. Now.’ Ben’s voice was low, his words measured.
‘And I’m not going to disagree with you. This does indeed need to end. But how we do that… well. That needs to be discussed.’
‘I made a mistake. I should never have become one of them. The second I pulled on that cut I knew I didn’t belong… I knew I was betraying you. Betraying the Dark Angels.’
‘You’d already betrayed us, son.’
‘You can honestly stand there and still believe that’s true? Huh? Or have you lived with the lie for so long now that you actually do believe the shit you spin?’
‘You need to show some respect, Benjamin. Or this conversation is going to take a very diffe
rent turn.’
Ben held his hands up, a slow smirk spreading across his face. ‘Hey. Take your best shot. Come on. You think I’m afraid to die?’ Even as he said the words, he knew he needed to pull back from this. For now, he had to pull back from this. The time would come for him to deal with his father. He just had to be patient.
Hector let out another chuckle, his eyes never leaving Ben’s. ‘I brought you up well, my son. But did you honestly think it was going to be that easy?’
Ben lowered his arms, but stood his ground. ‘I know too much. I know everything. I know things you don’t ever want Sol to find out, because if he did…’ He stopped talking, breaking the stare, briefly lowering his gaze before raising his head to once more meet his father’s eyes. ‘You know what he’d do… Look, I don’t want to dig it all up again. That’s not why I’m here. I don’t want any trouble between us, I really don’t. I just want my family back.’ Saying those words made him feel sick. All of a sudden shutting down his emotions was becoming a much tougher job than he’d anticipated. ‘I’ve had a lot of time to think and… I made a mess of everything, Dad, and I just want a chance to prove my loyalty. To prove I can finally be the son you want me to be.’
‘And what about Sol?’
Ben said nothing for a second or two, a weary resignation sweeping over him. ‘I guess I have to make him believe that the remorse I’m feeling is real. It’s just hard to feel remorse for something you didn’t do.’
Hector was still wary, Ben could tell. The old man’s eyes had not one flicker of any emotion that Ben could read, and he really had no idea which way this was going to go.
‘It was bad enough you working for them,’ Hector began, moving a little closer. ‘Even that was a dig we should never have ignored. But becoming one of them? That made everything so much worse.’
Ben’s eyes searched his father’s old and tired face, every line and scar hiding the secrets he never wanted exposing.
‘And you coming here, telling me this, I wasn’t expecting that. Does it change anything?’ Hector cocked his head slightly, a slow, sideways smile twisting up the corner of his mouth. ‘I don’t know, Benjamin. I really don’t know.’
Ten
‘Am I disturbing you?’
Coby looked up, aiming a genuinely warm smile at Mia, something which automatically put her on the back foot. She wasn’t used to seeing him this way, all friendly smiles and warm eyes. ‘No, darlin’, you’re not disturbing me.’
She sat down on the stool next to him, nodding at Red as he held out a beer.
‘Had a good day?’ Coby asked, downing his whisky in one mouthful.
Mia shrugged, ripping the top off her beer and taking a long swig.
Coby just raised an eyebrow. He had his answer. ‘Time to kick back, huh?’ He looked around the packed clubhouse. This hadn’t been an organized get-together, but it would appear that a party had started from out of nowhere, and who was he to turn a night of drinking down? It was everything he needed to forget the shit Lexi was putting on him. The guilt he didn’t need to feel.
‘You seen Ben?’ Mia asked, her eyes darting around the clubhouse.
‘Not recently. You need him for something?’
‘No. Not really.’ She took another swig of beer before sliding down from the stool. ‘I’ll go see if he’s outside.’
‘Mia?’
She turned back around. ‘Yeah?’
‘Everything OK, darlin’?’
She threw him a smile, hoping it was sincere enough to stop him asking any more questions she wasn’t in the mood to answer. Mainly because she didn’t think she’d know how to. ‘Everything’s fine.’
She quickly headed out of the clubhouse before Coby had a chance to prolong the conversation. It was a little quieter out there. Not many people had congregated in the yard, even though a huge barrel fire was taking the edge off the slightly chilly evening temperature.
Making her way over to the bikes parked outside she checked to see if Ben’s was there. It was. So he was around here somewhere. But she was absolutely positive he wasn’t inside.
Turning back around she headed over to the office next to the garage. There was a light on, and she could hear voices so she stood back, keeping her eyes on the door. It was a few minutes before anybody came out, and she squinted slightly to see who it was, just making out Sheriff Bailey as he made for his car, driving off quickly and quietly.
Frowning, she continued to walk towards the office, standing still again as another figure came out, pulling the door closed behind him. Ben. But, for some reason, her feet wouldn’t seem to move. She was rooted to the spot as she watched him walk away, his head down, his hands in his pockets.
‘Ben?’ Her voice was little more than a whisper as he headed towards her, so she was surprised when he lifted his head, his eyes meeting hers.
‘How long have you been there?’
‘What was Michael doing here?’
‘Michael?’
‘I saw him leave. Just now.’
Ben took her by the wrist, pulling her around the corner, into the shadows. ‘You spying on me?’ His voice carried an almost sinister edge that sent a cold shiver up Mia’s spine.
‘Of course I’m not spying on you. Jesus, Ben, cut out the paranoia, OK? What the hell is wrong with you lately?’
He pushed her back against the wall, moving in closer, close enough for her to feel his breath on her face. ‘Nothing is wrong, Mia, I keep telling you that.’
‘And I still think you’re lying to me.’
‘What did I ask you to do, huh? I asked you to trust me, to know that I’m dealing with it. And yet, you’re still hassling me, still bitching about it, and I really don’t need your shit. Not on top of everything else.’
‘I hate not knowing what’s going on, Ben. I hate not knowing if you’re gonna be safe, if you’re even gonna get out of whatever this is alive…’
His mouth was on hers before she had a chance to take another breath, pressing down hard, his lips practically bruising hers with the force of the kiss. But then, almost as if something or someone else had taken the reins, the kiss became slower, gentler, his hands on her hips pulling her closer until their bodies touched.
‘I don’t need any more crap today, Mia. Do you understand? What I need is for you to quit with the whining, cut out the nagging, and let me do what I need to do without worrying about you. Are you listening to me here, sweetheart?’
‘Fuck you!’ she hissed, pulling his hands away from her and stepping out of his grasp, but he was too fast for her; too strong. And in one swift movement she didn’t have time to see coming he’d pinned her back against the wall, his face once more right up in hers.
‘I need you to back off, Mia. I really need you to do that, do you hear me?’
Her eyes bored deep into his, the strangest of sensations taking over, filling her with an almost warped excitement mixed with just a hint of fear.
‘Do you understand what I’m saying, baby?’
She didn’t. Not really. But it was like someone else was working her, like invisible strings had somehow been attached and every movement she was making now, they were all involuntary. So even though she was nodding, she couldn’t get her head around any of this. Where was the man she’d fallen in love with just a few weeks ago? When had everything changed; when had he changed?
‘Good.’ He smiled, gently stroking her cheek with his fingertips, his eyes still locked with hers. ‘That’s good.’
‘Ben…’
‘Ssh…’ he whispered, still stroking her cheek, his fingers lowering to skim over her collarbone, and it was a few seconds more before she realized his other hand was slowly pulling her panties down. Why wasn’t she stopping him? Because she wasn’t altogether sure that she wanted this. ‘It’s all gonna be OK, Mia, I promised you that, didn’t I?’ His mouth rested against hers as he continued to push her panties down over her thighs. ‘I promised you it was all gonna be OK…’
&nb
sp; ‘And like I said, Ben…’ Finding that inner strength she’d had to dig up every time she’d needed it with Lennie, she took hold of his hand and yanked it away, pulling her panties back up. ‘Fuck you!’
‘Jesus, Mia…!’
She didn’t look back, she didn’t want to. She didn’t even know who he was anymore, just that he wasn’t the man she loved. That wasn’t him.
‘Hey! Slow down, darlin’.’
She felt someone grab her arm, looking up to see Coby. And only then did she realize she must have been running. From Ben. She’d been running from Ben.
‘I’m gonna ask you this again, Mia. Is everything OK?’
She wrenched her arm free of his grip. ‘I need a drink.’
‘Aye.’ He glanced behind him. ‘Me too, darlin’. Me too.’ It was still quiet out in the yard, although the noise from inside the clubhouse seemed to be getting louder – music blaring, voices shouting; raucous laughter. ‘I’m guessing you don’t feel much like going back in there?’ Coby raised a questioning eyebrow.
Mia wrapped her arms around herself as a light breeze washed over her, causing her exposed skin to break out in goose bumps. ‘You guess right.’
‘Come on. I’ve got a bottle of twelve year old Scotch I keep in one of the tool draws over in the garage.’
She couldn’t help smiling. ‘Whatever gets you through the day, huh?’
‘Something like that,’ he laughed, jerking his head towards the garage. ‘Come on.’
Mia looked over to where she’d just left Ben, but he seemed to have disappeared. She guessed he must’ve gone inside, because she hadn’t heard anyone leave the compound.
Following Coby into the garage she pulled herself up onto the workbench, watching as he retrieved the bottle of Scotch, twisting off the cap and offering the bottle to her.
‘Sorry, sweetheart, I don’t do glasses in here.’
She took the bottle from him, taking a small swig, swallowing it down way too fast which caused her to cough as the warm liquid burned her throat.
Resurrection (The Lone Riders MC Series Book 3) Page 6