by Helen Harper
He held out his palm and a lanky Fey jumped forward and gave him a brick. ‘All I need you to do, Madrona, is to drop this little beauty. It’s bound to hit someone on the head.’ His expression gleamed. ‘There will be a lot of blood. There always is.’
I clapped my hands. ‘I love blood!’
I reached over, snatched the brick from him and dropped it over the parapet. Rubus’s jaw dropped open and both of us leaned over to watch its descent. It narrowly avoided hitting three young women, crashing just to the left of them instead and cracking the pavement. Several pedestrians’ heads swivelled up to see where it had come from. Both Rubus and I pulled back out of sight to avoid being spotted.
I pouted. ‘I missed.’
Rubus watched me, his expression inscrutable. I couldn’t even begin to guess what he was thinking. ‘So you did,’ he murmured.
‘Morgan told me I was an evil bitch,’ I confided. ‘I thought I’d try and live up to his expectations. It didn’t take long to realise how much fun it is being bad to the bone.’ I dropped my voice into a conspiratorial whisper. ‘I think I might be a bit of a psychopath.’
‘A bit of a psychopath?’
‘I have discovered,’ I said airily, ‘that I’m also known as the Madhatter. I believe it rather fits.’ I added a maniacal grin for extra effect.
Rubus didn’t appear particularly impressed. ‘Morganus gave you that nickname. You keep forgetting that I know you were with him when I found you.’ His left eyelid twitched almost imperceptibly. ‘It looked to me as if you were very concerned about his welfare.’
‘Dude!’ I thumped his arm. ‘Of course I was concerned! He was all upset that I’d left him for you. I made a bet with myself that I could still get him to unzip his tight jeans for me. He’s a sexy arsebadger.’ I gave Rubus a critical look. ‘You look quite alike, you know.’
Rubus was astonishingly put out. Honestly, he was like a child. ‘You like him more than you like me.’
‘Well,’ I said, ‘he might have called me an evil bitch but he was also quite nice to me and helped with those stalkers and with the nux. You all but abducted me.’
Rubus glared. ‘I helped stop those stalkers more than he did. And I can be very nice too.’ He leaned forward. ‘If you’ll let me. I’m working hard to get all us faeries back home to Mag Mell. Morganus is doing nothing more than pulling a few pints and walking around the city pouting.’
I smirked. ‘He probably likes his steak well-done too.’ I waggled my finger at Rubus. ‘But it doesn’t change the fact that I have no reason to be impressed by you, despite all your fine words. You put a damned giant spider on me!’
‘It was a Truth Spider. I had to learn the truth from you. I had to know I could trust you,’ he growled. His eyelid was twitching even more furiously.
‘But,’ I said softly, ‘how am I supposed to know whether I can trust you?’
Rubus didn’t answer. His eyes remained fixed on mine until suddenly he turned round and addressed the waiting group of patient minions. ‘We are leaving,’ he said. ‘You lot go search for the bogle. The others can prepare for Plan B.’
Plan B? Wariness ran through me. I opened my mouth to ask Rubus about it but he jerked his thumb at his patiently waiting minions and indicated the time for chat was over. ‘Bring her.’
I exhaled. Despite what else might be going on, I thought I’d done rather a neat job of flipping the conversation. I might not remember anything specific about Rubus but I had no doubt that he was both dangerous and crazy. If I could keep him focused on what he had to do for me, rather than the other way around, then I might just find a way out of this mess.
I didn’t want to have to throw any more bricks at the soft skulls of human beings. It had been remarkably difficult to time the toss to avoid hitting anyone directly. Even then I’d been nervous that I’d got the trajectory wrong. It was just as well it wasn’t a breezy day. Gasbudlikins. Maybe I was evil. I had no desire to be indiscriminately evil, though; that would be a complete waste of energy.
***
We took the lift down to the lobby. I was flanked by two Fey arsebadgers all the way down. Maybe they were expecting me to fling myself upon Rubus and attack him, or make a run for it while in the tiny enclosed space by throwing myself at the doors and shrieking. Considering how nasty Rubus’s aftershave was, that was quite a tempting move. It really was unpleasantly overpowering.
When we finally reached the bottom and exited the lift – and I was able breathe through my nose again – I spotted a woman wearing a T-shirt and jeans heading towards the ladies’ toilets. A cartoon picture of a snail was emblazoned across her chest and her eyes, which she quickly cast to the ground when I glanced at her, were bright green.
‘I need to pee,’ I announced loudly.
‘Cross your legs,’ growled the nearest Fey.
I did as he suggested, bowing slightly at my waist and hobbling forward. ‘It’s not helping,’ I complained. ‘Do you have a bottle or something? Maybe I can squat here in front of you. Will that suit you?’
Rubus sighed. ‘Bring the car round to the front. I’ll wait for her there. You two stay with her till she’s done.’
I beamed. ‘Thank you. I don’t want to leave a smelly wet patch on your car’s upholstery.’
Rubus walked out of the front building while I – and my two minders – dashed to the toilet. I banged open the door, assuming they were following, and darted into the nearest cubicle.
‘You’d think,’ I called out, as I settled onto the loo seat, ‘that the amnesia I’m suffering from wouldn’t affect my bodily functions. After all, it’s a problem with my mind, not my body. But I have to pee so much! And clearly my stomach is disturbed because I’ve got constipation too. It’s hard work straining your bowels all the time. I don’t suppose you’ve got any laxatives on you? I could do with releasing some of that stinky brown stuff so—’
‘We’re going to wait outside,’ one of the Fey snapped, interrupting me in mid-flow. ‘Don’t be long.’ A moment later I heard the door open and close behind them.
I breathed out, jumped to my feet and cocked my head. One of the many things I’d discovered about myself was that I possessed incredible hearing. Having already latched onto both Fey’s heartbeats, I could tell that they’d positioned themselves directly outside the restroom door. Of course, they also had the same excellent hearing. I would have be careful.
I unlatched the cubicle door at the same time as the snail woman did. She flashed me a crooked grin and walked to the basins, turning on every tap. I reached for the automatic hand dryer, set it off and kept my hand in place so that its sound also filled the room. When I glanced back, the woman had gone. In her place was a heart-breakingly familiar face.
‘I wasn’t sure you’d get the reference,’ Morgan murmured. ‘But I had to be subtle enough to avoid detection.’
As if I’d forget that he was Snail Boy. He was named after a sea snail and I’d thoroughly enjoyed laughing at him for it. I grabbed him, yanking him towards me so I could hug him. It was awkward with one hand out of action under the dryer but I pressed him tightly against me.
His hands wrapped round my back and his lips found my ear. ‘We still have to be careful. I couldn’t hold the glamour for much longer and if we’re overheard before…’
‘I know,’ I whispered. ‘I’m just glad you’re okay.’ I pulled back slightly and looked into his eyes. ‘I didn’t want to go with Rubus. There wasn’t any choice though. I promise. I—’
‘Shhh,’ he said. ‘I know. I was drifting in and out of consciousness when he showed up and took you but I heard enough of what he said.’ He paused. ‘And did. I’ve had people out looking for him. When you were spotted coming into this building, I got here as quickly as I could.’
‘I’m really glad you did.’ Unexpected tears pricked at my eyelids. Well, that was a surprise. I pulled back so I could look at Morgan’s face. ‘Jinn?’ I asked, even though I already knew the answer.
‘And the sphere?’ I asked in a low, urgent voice.
‘It’s safe. Rubus won’t find it. Not now.’
I passed a hand over my face in relief. At least that was something.
Morgan’s eyes searched mine. ‘Are you okay?’ he asked gruffly. ‘Has he hurt you?’
‘No. Lots of bluster and threats but I’m fine.’ I gazed at him. ‘More to the point, how are you? You could have died back there.’
‘It’ll take more than a few vampire-crazy humans to finish me. You should know that by that now. I have a sore head and my insides feel like a bullet has bounced around them – probably because it did. I’ll live, thanks to what you did to bring down that sniper.’
He squeezed my arm and the gesture squeezed at my heart. I reckoned the pair of us needed a good shag before I melted into a puddle by his feet. It felt damned amazing to be thought of as Morgan’s saviour; surely I deserved some decent sex in return.
Unfortunately, he had other plans. ‘Now, listen. I’ve rounded up the troops. There are a dozen Fey loyal to me outside. As soon as we leave here, those two hefting lumps will see me and make a move. They can’t actually hurt either of us although I’ll be expecting a lot of noise. We can cope with that. You’ll be back at the Metropolitan Bar within the hour, Maddy.’
Suddenly I took a step back. ‘I can’t do that. I have to stay with Rubus.’
Morgan stilled. ‘Why?’ His voice was completely flat and the warmth in his eyes vanished immediately.
I twisted my hands. ‘Because he’s dangerous! You told me what he was like morally but you failed to mention that he’s completely crazy as well. He’s desperate to get his hands on the sphere. Goodness knows what will happen when he fails. He said something about a Plan B. We need to know what that is. We need someone on the inside. I think that’s what I was doing all along when I was drug dealing for him. It’s not that I’m a superhero or a supervillain.’ I grinned at Morgan. ‘I’m a super spy.’
He raised his eyes briefly to the heavens. ‘And you think that Rubus is crazy,’ he muttered. His expression remained cool. ‘You want him.’
Good grief. He was as daft as his brother. ‘Sometimes I wonder who ties your shoes for you in the morning, Morgan. I don’t want Rubus. I want to stop Rubus.’
Morgan folded his arms across his broad chest. ‘He has been stopped. The sphere has been taken care of. There’s nothing to worry about any longer.’
‘He’s been stopped temporarily,’ I argued. ‘He’s not going to give up. He’s determined to save all the Fey and return us to Mag Mell, regardless of the consequences. Remember what Artemesia, your apothecary friend said? Forces unseen will lead me to places and people who are related to my memory loss. I was led to Rubus so I have to stay with him now.’
‘He found you,’ he snapped. ‘Not the other way around.’
‘Does it matter? He won’t stop at anything to become our glorious saviour. If he can’t locate the dragon sphere, he’ll find another way. He was prepared to flood this entire demesne with magic and effectively destroy it to achieve his goal. What if he finds another way that’s equally destructive? I would much rather toddle off without a backward glance in his direction but we can’t let him continue with whatever else he’s planning! If I stay with him, I can get him to trust me again. I know I can. With me on the inside, we’ll know his every move.’
‘And what,’ Morgan enquired, ‘will you do to get him to trust you?’
‘Whatever I can!’ I said, the words out of my mouth before I thought about them. When Morgan’s gaze shuttered, I realised what he thought I was referring to. ‘I don’t mean sex! I’m not going to open my legs for him.’
‘What if he demands it?’
I glowered. ‘I can look after myself.’
‘Apparently so.’
Our argument had been conducted in annoyed whispers but we obviously weren’t doing a good enough job, even with the noise from the running taps and the hand dryer masking us. There was a sudden thump on the door. ‘What’s going on?’ one of the Fey arsebadgers called.
I shoved Morgan into the nearest cubicle just in time. The Fey opened the door and looked inside. ‘Who were you talking to?’ he demanded.
‘Myself,’ I answered back. At his narrow-eyed look, I shrugged. ‘I’m the Madhatter.’
‘You’re Madrona. We’re not allowed to call you the Madhatter.’
I twirled round, flapping my arms. I needed the Fey to be distracted enough to focus on me – and not listen closely enough to realise there was another heartbeat only a metre away. ‘Madhatter!’ I sang out. ‘I’m the Maaaaaadhattter!’
‘Get out of there,’ he snapped. ‘Rubus is waiting.’
‘I love how you state the obvious with such a sense of discovery,’ I told him. The Fey growled at me. I patted him on the back and followed him out. ‘Were we friends before I got amnesia?’ I enquired.
‘No.’
‘Were we lovers?’
‘No.’
‘Nothing more than work colleagues?’ I asked. ‘That’s a bit dull.’
He glared at me but at least his partner snickered. Then they took their positions at either side of me and escorted me out to the waiting car.
I resisted the urge to look back. It was just as well killing glances weren’t a faery skill or I reckoned the skin would have been stripped off my back by now. Morgan was not a happy Fey bunny. And despite my relief that he was still up and breathing, I had to admit that neither was I.
Chapter Two
Once Rubus’s driver had set off, I buckled up my seatbelt and sniffed my fingers. Rubus glanced at me. ‘I was just checking,’ I said. ‘I can’t remember if I washed my hands or not.’
He grimaced in disgust. ‘You were gone for long enough to manage that.’ He reached into the door pocket and passed me a hand sanitizer. ‘Please.’
I shrugged and took some. ‘You’re not a fan of germs?’ I enquired.
Rubus didn’t bother to answer. Maybe, I thought hopefully, I could introduce salmonella. Or legionnaire’s disease. If I did it accidentally on purpose, surely that wouldn’t break the truce? I pursed my lips. Hmmmm.
‘What?’
I frowned at him. ‘Eh?’
Rubus rolled his eyes. ‘You’ve obviously thought of something. What is it?’
‘I was wondering about the truce,’ I said. ‘And how it works.’
‘It’s magic,’ he answered tersely.
‘Well, I got that part. Duh.’
Rubus growled. I shrugged then I raised a hand and attempted to strike him. My hand froze in mid-air and a flash of pain overtook me. ‘Ouchy!’ I yelled.
For the first time, Rubus bestowed me with a genuine smile. ‘That’s how it works.’
I stared at my hand. Straining, I tried to fling it forward in another bid to punch him. More pain coursed through my system and my damned hand wouldn’t budge. Beads of sweat popped out on my forehead with the effort. Eventually, I dropped my hand and gave up. ‘Damn,’ I whispered.
‘The truce has its uses,’ Rubus said, obviously still amused.
‘Explain it to me.’
He raised an eyebrow. ‘Is that an order?’
I dismissed his curt enquiry. ‘A request.’
He ran a hand through his hair, in a gesture that was achingly familiar of Morgan. ‘When we realised the border to Mag Mell was closed, there was a meeting,’ he said. ‘All the Fey in this demesne were present. Even you.’
I sniffed. ‘Well, I’m Fey, aren’t I?’
He ignored me. ‘It was decided that there was considerable danger to other life forms if things continued as they were. We Fey don’t always … see eye to eye. Not that it should be a problem for anyone if there’s the odd argument. We’re obviously superior to humans –
we’re the top of the food chain. Who cares if any of them get hurt?’
‘Indeed,’ I murmured. ‘Do we cook them before we eat them?’
Rubus recoiled. ‘Eat humans? Are you insane?’
‘You said we’re at the top at the food chain.’
‘I mean figuratively speaking. Good grief, Madrona. We’re not monsters.’
I begged to differ but I nodded wisely. ‘Morgan said something similar. About the truce – not the eating people part. We all signed it so there’d be no fighting between us.’
Rubus’s lip curled. ‘It was a stupid idea from the start. I had no choice but to agree. A strand of magic was taken from each of us and they were woven together to form the truce. It means we’re all bound by it.’
‘And it can’t be broken?’
He raised his shoulders in a heavy shrug. ‘Perhaps if we could see the magic that ties us all, we could find a way to break it. But you can’t break that which is invisible to sight, sound or touch. It is what it is.’
Even without his tales of trying to poke out his brother’s eyes, I’d have recognised that Rubus had already put considerable effort into finding ways to destroy the truce so he could work his wicked ways around the world. Rather than dwell on his failures, which I doubted would improve his mood, I took a different tack. ‘Why weren’t Redcaps and dragons and bogles included in the terms of the truce?’
Rubus laughed humourlessly. ‘We didn’t know about the dragons until recently. And the others weren’t considered important enough – or powerful enough – to bother about. That’s why they’re so useful to me now, despite their lack of powerful magic.’ His expression darkened. ‘They’re useful when they’re loyal. Both the Redcaps and the bogle have betrayed me and I can’t help thinking that you are involved with both. It can’t be a coincidence that Charrie, the bogle who worked for me, disappeared at the same time as you lost your memory.’
‘Honestly,’ I said, ‘you could well be right. But I can’t remember either way. All I have to go on is what other people tell me.’