by Helen Harper
‘We don’t trust you either,’ Morgan said levelly. ‘Tailing Madrona around the city? Tracking us here? Spying? We have no reason to believe you have pure intentions.’
‘Indeed.’ Mendax appraised him silently for a moment. ‘Perhaps we can come up with a solution. Something which will enable us all to trust each other.’
‘What do you suggest?’
The old dragon tapped his mouth as if in thought but it was all for show. He clearly already knew exactly what he was going to say. ‘You were the one who initiated a bit of quid pro quo and it’s worked well so far. Let’s take it to the next stage. I will give you what exists of the oath breaker, as well as the video file proving Madrona’s culpability. I won’t make any copies of it. In return, you will give me an object belonging to Rubus. I haven’t seen him in person but I’ve seen photos – human technology does have its place. He wears a ring on his pinky finger, doesn’t he? Bring me that ring and I will be more inclined to trust you.’
Morgan’s jaw was clenched. ‘He never removes the ring and he would never willingly give it up. It belonged to our father.’
Mendax smiled. ‘Then when you bring it to me, I will know for certain that you are not in his pocket.’ He sighed happily. ‘Once the exchange has occurred, perhaps we can build on our mutual trust and re-engage in negotiations over the sphere.’
‘We don’t have the sphere,’ Morgan said.
‘Sure.’ Mendax nodded, his expression almost as sarcastic as his voice. ‘You don’t have it now. But perhaps you can be persuaded to get hold of it so that I can destroy it.’
Finn bristled. ‘It seems that we are putting ourselves at greater risk than you are to achieve this trust-exchange bullshit. All you have to do is open a safe. We have to risk our lives.’
I snorted. If we agreed to this, it was obviously me who’d be doing all the risking.
Mendax shrugged. ‘Do you really think that I would enjoy the fallout if the truce were destroyed? The faeries were sensible to establish it in the first place. You can’t go anywhere in this city without feeling their frustration at being trapped here. Frustration leads to conflict – and that’s the sort of conflict I would prefer not to happen in my own home.’ He looked at Finn. ‘You’re a Redcap. You must understand that as well as I do. Although,’ he added, ‘as far as you’re concerned, if you lose the truce, you’ll gain the Fey back-up you require to avenge your brother’s death.’
Finn’s face turned a bright shade of red, caused by fury at the mention of Jinn’s demise rather than embarrassment. Sooner or later he’d take a swing at Rubus whether he had support from faeries like Morgan and myself or not. He’d never win and, much as I hated to admit it, I didn’t want to see the Redcap die needlessly.
Morgan got to his feet. ‘How do we contact you?’
‘Are you agreeing to my proposal?’ Mendax enquired, without moving from his own chair.
‘We will consider it. That’s as far as I am prepared to go for now.’
Mendax pursed his lips. ‘Then that will do. For now.’ He thought for a moment then pulled a small card from his pocket and passed it over. ‘I have a PO box that I use for deliveries. My lair, unlike Chen’s, is sacrosanct. I don’t permit anyone to visit it, so the PO box comes in handy. Leave a message there with a time, date and,’ he paused, ‘a neutral meeting place and I’ll endeavour to see you there. If you obtain Rubus’s ring, tell me and I will bring the oath breaker when I meet you. If you decide not to go ahead with this exchange then our business is concluded.’ His face tightened. ‘And know that if you do have the sphere, despite your denials, I shall do everything in my power to take it from you. It was not meant for your kind.’
‘You and whose army?’ Finn sneered. ‘Try anything and I’ll rip your intestines out of your throat, wrap them round my dick and have sexual relations with your skull.’
Nobody said a word. Well, that was one way to kill a conversation dead. I wasn’t sure I could even look at Finn after that. And I was the villainous murdering bitch amongst us.
‘Well,’ Mendax murmured. ‘Whatever floats your boat.’ He got to his feet in a surprisingly lithe movement for such an old man. ‘I’ll leave first. Don’t do anything foolish like try and follow me.’
He headed for the door then turned to look at us. ‘Make sure you wipe the video evidence of this little chat this time,’ he smirked at me.
A moment later we were alone again.
Chapter Ten
A considerable amount of time went by before anyone spoke. I drank more water. Finn drummed his fingers against the leather arm of his chair. Morgan didn’t move a muscle. It wasn’t until I’d had so much to drink that my bladder was on the point of exploding that I finally tossed the cup into the nearby bin and stalked to the middle of the floor.
‘I’m a killer,’ I said loudly. Too loudly. My voice echoed around the empty clubhouse, my words reverberating back at me just in case I still wasn’t sure. ‘But I think we need to look upon my unveiling as a good thing.’
Morgan still didn’t move. Finn quirked a bushy eyebrow; given his misshapen head, the overall effect was rather startling, like a lumpy hunk of clay with random hair added. I didn’t have the time to comment, however.
‘How so?’ he enquired.
‘I have the stomach for getting the job done,’ I answered simply. ‘Whatever that job may be. Probably not pulling out someone’s guts through their throat and wrapping them round my cock because firstly I don’t have a cock and secondly even I’m not that much of a cock. But,’ I continued, in a more sombre vein, ‘I can do what needs to be done, whether that’s getting rid of Mendax because he’s an untrustworthy arsebadger who’s planning to slit all our throats the first chance he gets, or getting rid of Rubus if this oath-breaker thing actually works.’
Finn looked me up and down critically. ‘Without wanting to disparage you, Madhatter, I’m not sure you’d have the bodily strength to succeed over either of them.’
I ignored the slight to my muscles; I’d insulted them enough myself already. ‘There’s more than one way to flay a feline. I have faery magic. I’ve only used it to deliberately harm someone once before, when I took out that sniper who was after Julie. But the ability is certainly there.’ My voice was quiet. I’d never discovered if what I’d done that day had killed the sniper that had been targeting her; I’d always assumed I’d just winded him or something. Now, of course, I was no longer so sure.
I was expecting Finn to make some sort of snide remark about my black-hearted willingness to end another life. He’d probably include his brother Winn in it as I could certainly be held at least partially – if not wholly responsible – for his death, accidental or otherwise. Instead he surprised me. ‘It’s good that you’re in this with us then,’ he said.
I blinked at him and waited for him to finish the sentence with a cutting insult but he didn’t seem to have anything else to say. Then a thought occurred to me. I tilted my head and I put my hands on my hips. ‘Hang on one dastardly second,’ I said. ‘Do you feel sorry for me? Is this pity because I’ve finally been forced to confront the truth about myself?’ I glared at him. ‘Don’t you dare feel that for me!’
Finn’s mouth twitched. ‘You know,’ he drawled, ‘the best way to kill a cat isn’t to skin it. It’s to choke it with cream.’
I saw what he was doing. I’d tried to manipulate him in a similar fashion only a few hours ago. I glowered at him accusingly. ‘You think you can kill me with kindness? Because I wouldn’t kill a cat like that. I’d take it by its tail and—’
‘Quiet,’ Morgan said. ‘I really don’t think this is an appropriate conversation topic.’ He looked faintly green.
‘Are you a cat lady, Morgan?’ I asked. ‘Are you sickened by our discussion of how to murder a moggy?’
‘Let’s focus on more important things, shall we?’
Finn and I exchanged knowing looks then I noticed the way Morgan was studiously avoiding meeting my eyes an
d my short-lived amusement vanished. He’d despised me when I’d met him ten days ago and he despised me again now. My shoulders sagged and I swallowed down the pussy joke that had been on my lips. I sat down again but not next to Morgan; I didn’t want to watch him recoil from me.
‘I don’t get a good feeling about Mendax,’ I said, returning to business. ‘I don’t think we can trust him.’
‘I agree,’ Finn said, surprising me yet again. ‘Let’s not forget that the man’s a dragon. There’s never been a more self-centred species. All they care about is hoarding stuff and looking after themselves. The only reason a dragon would be bothered by an impending apocalypse is if it drove up gold prices and destroyed their treasure chests in the process.’
‘Perhaps that’s exactly why we can trust him,’ Morgan said. ‘His motives might be selfish but at least that sort of selfishness can be equated with honesty.’
‘We don’t need him,’ I pointed out. ‘The sphere is safe with you. Nothing else matters.’
‘I don’t believe he was bluffing about using the CCTV footage against you.’ Morgan’s jaw tightened. ‘He’d hand it over to the police for no other reason than to be spiteful.’
I cast down my eyes. ‘Maybe it should be handed over. Maybe I deserve to be punished.’
‘Sorry? I didn’t quite catch that.’
I looked up and raised my voice. ‘I can find out where Mendax lives,’ I said. ‘I can stake out his PO box, follow him home, slit his bony throat and take back the video. I’ll find this oath-breaker thing at the same time. The whole operation won’t take more than a day or two.’
Morgan finally met my gaze and a ghost of a smile crossed his mouth. I couldn’t tell whether it was because he was laughing at me or he thought I was just being cute.
‘Except,’ Finn interjected, ‘his point about the sphere was valid. I’m homesick. I feel the ache for my own demesne although I know it’s not as physical or as acute as what you Fey feel. It’s been ten years since the borders were closed and it’s got worse. It wakes me up at night and it haunts my dreams. What happens in another ten years? Or another ten after that?’
Morgan nodded grimly. ‘It could get so bad that any of us will be desperate enough to use the sphere and bring on the magic that will destroy this world. It’s certainly not beyond the realms of possibility.’
‘I feel the ache,’ I argued. ‘But it’s not that bad. I can live with it.’
Morgan’s mouth twisted. ‘I think the reason you don’t feel it as keenly as the rest of us is because you don’t remember anything about Mag Mell. It’s as if the amnesia you suffered reset your cravings back to zero.’
I shrugged. ‘It’s a fait accompli then, isn’t it? Give every faery amnesia!’
‘Except,’ Morgan pointed out, ‘we don’t know what caused yours. And I doubt that every faery in the land will queue up to forget everything about themselves.’
‘Lots of faeries queued up for pixie dust. It soothed away the ache, right? I know it’s addictive. I know it can be misused. But surely a small group of addicts is a small price to pay for saving the world?’
‘Dust doesn’t work on Redcaps,’ Finn said. ‘And that idea is not really a solution.’
I didn’t see why not. It would even keep Rubus happy.
‘You can’t force people to take drugs, Maddy.’
‘Well,’ I answered, ‘you can. You just don’t want to.’
Morgan raked a hand through his hair and got to his feet. He walked over to one of the windows and gazed out at the shadowed, night-filled golf course. ‘The easiest answer to all of this is to do what Mendax says. We learn to trust him, he learns to trust us, and together we destroy the sphere once and for all.’
‘You could take the sphere and hide it,’ I said. ‘No one but you has to know where it is.’
Morgan didn’t turn around. ‘I can withstand most Truth Draws,’ he said, ‘even when they’re conducted by very experienced Fey. I don’t know that I have the strength to withstand one of Rubus’s Truth Spiders. I don’t know that anyone has that kind of capability. All he’d need to do is get hold of me and use one of those creatures to bring out the truth.’
‘So put the sphere somewhere where no one can get hold of it even if they do know where it is! You could…’ I searched around, trying to think of a way ‘…you could send it into space.’
Finn looked at me. ‘You know many astronauts, do you?’
‘All I’m saying is that we’ve not exhausted every possibility yet!’ I threw up my hands in frustration. Saving the world really shouldn’t be this damned difficult.
‘Mendax was talking sense, Maddy. Nothing is ever lost forever. The sphere needs to be destroyed. We need to know without a shadow of a doubt that it’s out of reach. The only way to do that is to get rid of it completely.’
I cursed loudly, even though I knew deep down he was right. I hated that he was right. ‘So do we do this, then? Do we deal with Mendax?’
His answer was quiet. ‘Is there any choice?’ He turned and looked at me, meeting my eyes. Almost. ‘Can you do it? Can you steal Rubus’s ring?’
‘Of course!’ I snapped, though I had no earthly idea how I’d manage it.
‘Then we take the first step towards the deal. We can still walk away at a later date. If there’s the faintest hint that we can’t trust Mendax fully, we keep the sphere to ourselves. If he keeps to his side of the bargain then, if nothing else, we might be able to break the truce so that we can remove Rubus from the equation. That’ll buy us time, if nothing else.’
‘You say that like we have nothing to lose.’
Morgan put his hands into his pockets. His eyes were half-closed so his expression was shuttered. ‘It will be incredibly dangerous. You don’t have to do it, Maddy. We can get the ring from Rubus without you risking yourself.’
His tone of voice told me that he knew his words were a lie. ‘I don’t think we can,’ I said quietly. I sighed. ‘I’ll do my best.’ I squared my shoulders. ‘I’ll do better than my best. I’ll get the damned ring. You keep thinking of ways to destroy the stupid sphere or hide it away for the rest of eternity. I’ll call you when I have the ring.’
‘Thank you.’ Then, almost inaudibly, he added, ‘You’re a much better person than you give yourself credit for.’
‘I’m a murderer, Morgan. I’m exactly the evil bitch you believed me to be.’
I couldn’t stay there any longer. I couldn’t stand there knowing that he could barely look at me. And the growing sympathy in Finn’s expression was becoming almost too much to cope with. Along with Morgan, I’d killed his brother, Winn, and I’d not been able to stop Rubus killing his other brother. I had no right to Finn’s pity.
‘Can you deal with clearing up here?’ I asked. The pair of them nodded. ‘Good.’ I sniffed. ‘I’m off. I’m dressed up to the nines and it’s about time I found a suitable club to dance away the rest of the night. I’ll speak to you both soon.’
I paused for a moment, waiting for Morgan to ask me to stay because I’d already promised to spend the night with him. I’d refuse, of course, but it would be nice to be asked. All he did, however, was turn away and head for the security room.
Finn actually looked concerned. I looked away. Yeah. Time to go.
***
I’d been lying about the dancing part, obviously, but I did require several stiff drinks if I was going to get any sleep. I trudged back down the hill to the main road where I could hopefully grab a taxi back to the city before finding a pub with late opening hours.
I muttered to myself all the time. Why had Charrie come to this place? Why had I killed him? Was it because the bogle had the sphere and I’d wanted to stop him from either using it himself or handing it over to Rubus to use? Or was it that I’d simply wanted to kill him for kicks? Were there others whose lives I’d snuffed out?
A mental image of Rubus casually thrusting a knife into Jinn’s throat flashed into my mind. Despite my obvious shor
tcomings, there had been nothing about that act which had titillated me. Quite the opposite. But if I’d been pure evil before the amnesia then I had to be pure evil now; a bump on the head and a bout of forgetfulness wouldn’t change my personality.
I kicked irritably at a fallen branch. Unfortunately, the ground underneath was muddier and more slippery than I’d realised and I skidded, arms flailing and legs flying out from underneath me, before landing flat on my back in true slapstick fashion.
I lay where I was for a moment, even though I could feel the damp, squelchy mud plastering the bare skin at my neck and snaking its way down the back of my corset like it had a mind of its own. Then I spread-eagled my body and moved my arms and legs. Mud angel. Maybe I could no longer believe any part of me was a superhero but I could well believe I was a dirty angel. A dirty angel with blood on her hands.
I sighed and stopped what I was doing. I could internalise my problems and fret all I wanted but I couldn’t change the past, whatever it was. Charrie would still be dead and I’d still have killed him. I could only focus on the future and the way forward.
With that thought in mind, I pushed myself up to a sitting position, hoping for a low-lying tree branch that I could use to heave myself up. That was when I spotted the small chest lying against the pile of rocks only a few metres away. Huh.
I was no longer naïve enough to believe this was a coincidence. Artemesia had surmised that the magic bound into my amnesia was causing my subconscious self to seek ways to reassert my memory and rebalance the scales. My previous experiences had certainly borne that out. But I was no longer so sure that I wanted my memory back. I was looking to the future, I reminded myself. Not the past.