by Linda Ford
She loved church. Loved singing with the others. Loved hearing God’s word. But as Jake’s deep voice joined hers, she knew enjoyment she’d never felt before. They shared the same hymnal. She didn’t look at him. Didn’t need to in order to sense he shared the same pleasure in singing songs of the faith.
The preacher opened his Bible. “Our scripture for today is First Samuel chapter seven verse twelve. ‘Then Samuel took a stone and set it between Mizpeth and Shen and called the name of it Ebenezer, saying Hitherto hath the Lord helped me.’” He spoke of God’s faithfulness to His people in the past and the assurance of His continued help and guidance in both the present and the future.
Peace filled Hannah’s heart. She was here because God had given her the gift of a hotel, a way to leave the confines of her home with a new stepfather and a chance to become all that God intended.
She rose after the benediction, renewed by the message, and smiled at Jake. “I expect you’ll have much to do today.”
“Not really. Mother and the boys have been invited to friends for the afternoon.”
“The cows?”
“All taken care of.”
They exited the church and stood in the warm sun. “A quiet day for you then?”
“Would you care to have lunch with me?”
“But nothing is open.”
He glanced after his mother. “I suppose we could go with Mother and the boys.”
She laughed. “You sound excited about that.”
“I’m not. Too much noise.”
She hesitated. A whole Sunday afternoon alone held no appeal, but another day with Jake… Her emotions were already in enough turmoil. But telling herself she felt sorry for him, she said, “I could put together a few things and we could have a little picnic.”
“Excellent.”
He accompanied her back to the hotel and stood outside as she gathered up a few simple things for a lunch. “If I’d a known you were coming I’d a baked a cake,” she sang softly so he wouldn’t hear. No cake. Three-day-old cookies would have to do. And cheese sandwiches. An afternoon in the sun would surely make up for any lack in the food.
She wondered if they would go toward the river again, but he headed in the other direction, past the church to a grove of trees. The sound of muted voices informed her it was a popular spot. They wouldn’t be alone. Good, she told herself, stifling her sense of disappointment.
He spread the blanket she’d brought and she passed him a sandwich.
“Did you enjoy the service?” she asked.
“I did, though I miss our little church out at the ranch.”
“You have a church out there?”
He chuckled at her surprise. “We’re actually quite civilized.”
“I didn’t mean it like that. I just never thought…. Well, I guess I thought it was isolated and … I don’t know. I’ve never been to a ranch, so I’m not sure what it would be like.”
“We’ll have to remedy that, won’t we?”
At the soft tone of his voice, she darted a look at him, intending to only steal a glance, but their eyes collided and she couldn’t pull away from his bottomless brown gaze. Did he mean his words as an invitation? Would she welcome it if he did? Wasn’t it best to forget this unlikely attraction between them? “I’ve always lived in town,” she murmured as if expecting him to see how far apart their worlds were.
“I guess you’d never be able to live on a ranch.”
His doubts as to her adaptability forced her to say, “I could do just about anything I made up my mind to do.”
He searched her gaze as if trying to determine exactly what she meant. She wondered herself. She couldn’t define what she thought, how she felt, other than it gave her a sensation like swinging too high, her breath catching on the upward arc, holding there after she’d begun the downward flight, catching up with her body just in time for it to repeat. She sucked in air, heavy with the scent of leaves getting ready for autumn, and pulled her thoughts together. “Tell me about your church.”
He chuckled again and turned his gaze away to pick a cookie from the tin. “It isn’t my church even though it’s on my land. Father built it as soon as he finished the house. Said they needed a place to worship. He wanted his outfit to have the option without traipsing off to town.”
“What does it look like?”
“It’s small. Constructed of logs like the house. Father made sure there was lots of light. The windows are clear so you look out on trees on one side and rolling hills on the other. I’d sooner worship outside, but the church isn’t half bad either.”
“It sounds beautiful. What about a preacher?”
“Pastor Rawson, the preacher you heard earlier this morning comes out in the afternoon.”
Hannah fiddled with a leaf that had fallen at her knee. “Tell me about how you became a Christian.”
Jake took two more cookies and leaned back against the nearest tree. “I can’t remember not knowing God loved me. One Sunday when I was about seven, a warm spring day I recall, I simply decided I wanted to join God’s family, and I went to the church and knelt at the front.”
Hannah’s throat tightened with emotion as she pictured a young Jake making his choice all alone. Seems from an early age he stood alone and strong. “It sounds very special.”
“It was. Still feels special.”
Again they looked deep into each other’s eyes. Hannah felt a connection beyond ordinary interest. This man had deep spiritual roots to accompany his strength of character. A person could safely lean on him. She sighed. His mother and sister were fortunate to have him.
“How about you?” he asked.
For a moment she thought he asked if she wanted to lean on him too. But he didn’t know she’d been thinking it. “Me?”
“How and when did you become part of God’s family?”
Her breath gusted out. “I, too, always knew God loved me. But I had more of a struggle. I didn’t want to give up my independence to belong to Him.”
Jake laughed hard and earned himself a frown. He stopped laughing and looked suitably serious, though his eyes danced and the corners of his mouth twitched. “I can see that might be a problem. How did you resolve it?”
She grinned. “I didn’t. God did. I’d been taught to read my Bible every day. I read some verses that made me willing to give up my way because I knew I could trust God to do what was best for me. They’re in Romans chapter eight. ‘And we know that all things work together for good to them that love God, to them who are the called according to His purpose.’ And ‘He that spared not His own Son, but delivered Him up for us all, how shall He not with Him also freely give us all things?’” She smiled from the depths of her heart. “He loved me enough to give His Son to die for me. I guess He wouldn’t do anything that wasn’t for my good.”
Jake took her hand. “Amen.”
Hannah knew that more than their hands connected. They’d shared from their faith experience, and a bond of deeper understanding had been forged.
A zephyr blew through the treetops, rustling the leaves, sending a shower of them to the ground. Hannah shook her head to get them out of her hair.
“Hold still,” Jake said, leaning close. “One’s stuck.” He touched his fingers to her head, gently easing the leaf from its perch. “It’s like a golden crown.” His voice seemed thick.
She felt his fingers working the leaf loose. Felt a thousand sensations race from her scalp to her heart. He released the leaf and tossed it to the ground. She didn’t look up. Couldn’t free herself from the longing in her heart—a longing to be held and cherished.
“Some gold dust left behind,” he whispered, flicking his fingers through her hair.
She closed her eyes and thought of letting herself love this man.
She sucked her breath in and sat up straighter. “Thanks.” She didn’t belong in Jake’s world where he dominated, controlled, took care of—gently touched her hair. No. No. He didn’t belong in her world,
where she expected to be cherished but also given freedom to make her own choices. She turned to put the lid on the cookie tin. She knew one subject that would pull them both back to reality.
“I’ve got four rooms ready to open in the hotel, plus the suite will be available when you and your mother and the boys leave tomorrow.”
He dropped his hand, picked up a twig, broke it into inch long pieces and tossed them aside. “What about the dining room?”
“I’ll get Mort to board it off tomorrow.”
“Seems you’ll have to fix it sooner or later.”
“It will have to be later. I think I’ll be ready to put an open sign out by Tuesday.”
“That’s great.” He stood, waited for her to put the picnic things in the bag, and fold up the blanket.
She felt him pulling away from her. She’d ruined the afternoon. But she had no choice. They both needed to stick to reality. Yet she regretted it ever so slightly. About as much as one would regret denying themselves Christmas.
They returned to the hotel, and he handed her the blanket. “Thanks for the picnic. I have to check on the cows.” He strode away without a backward glance.
She went inside, stared at the hole in the dining room floor, and wondered what it would be like to live on a ranch. She shook her head. She had no time for dreams of romance, especially with a man like Jake. She had a hotel to fix and run. It was her dream come true.
*
The last animal jostled into the boxcar and Shorty pushed the door shut.
Jake shook hands with Mr. Arnold. “Nice doing business with you.”
“Sorry about the misunderstanding,” the man said.
Martin and Riggs stood at Jake’s side. He heard Martin’s grunt, but thankfully, the man kept his opinion silent and avoided alienating the man they hoped to do business with again.
They shook hands all around. Jake told the cowboys to head back to the ranch and he swung to the back of his horse. At the livery barn he told Con to bring the wagon. Once the supplies were loaded he could be on his way home. He couldn’t wait.
He paused outside the hotel door. He didn’t look forward to saying goodbye to Hannah, though in effect they’d said it yesterday. He didn’t want to leave her here on her own, yet she’d made it clear as the sky above that she wanted nothing more from him. There wasn’t room in her life or heart for a cowboy like him.
Saying goodbye today would simply be a matter of paying the bill, shaking hands and parting ways.
He pushed the door open and strode in. Mother sat in the lobby, the bags packed and ready. Looking after the boys a few days had meant this stay in town turned out to be less of a holiday for her than he’d planned. She should have told Audrey to take her children with her, but Mother never could say no to Audrey. And in order to keep from upsetting his mother, he usually gave in too.
Mother glanced past him. “What did you do with the boys?”
He checked the room. Saw no boys. “What do you mean?”
Mother grew pale. “I told them they could wait for you outside. Made them promise not to go past the corner.”
“I didn’t see them. The little rascals must have hidden.” He threw the door open and bellowed, “Luke, Sammy where are you?”
Mrs. Johnson, sweeping the steps in front of the store, paused to look at him.
“Have you seen the boys?” he asked.
“Not since earlier this morning when your mother took them out for breakfast.”
“Thanks.” He called them again. Nothing. Returned inside. “They’re not out there. Maybe they’re with Hannah.” He strode into the dining room, noticed she’d removed the damaged tables and chairs and pulled the rest to one corner. The hole gaped like a cave, and he got down on his knees to look inside. No boys. “Hannah,” he called again as she wasn’t in the room.
He found her outside, stacking the chairs and tables for Mort to burn. “Are the boys with you?”
She jerked around to face him. “Haven’t seen them since they came back from breakfast with your mother. Aren’t they with her?”
“No.” He wanted to brush the soot from her cheek and finger the strand of hair curling around her ear.
She looked toward the back door. “Are they playing a game?”
“I expect so.” He hurried to the lobby, Hannah hard on his heels.
“I’ll check the kitchen,” she said.
“I’ll look outside.”
Mother sat up. “I’ll—”
Jake held up his hand. “Wait here in case they come back. Then don’t let them out of your sight.”
He and Hannah returned in a few minutes. At the shake of her head and the worry in her eyes, he knew she’d had no more success in finding the pair than he had.
The three of them turned toward the stairs. Jake took them in three bounds and searched their suite thoroughly. He didn’t find two boys. Hannah stepped into the hall as he considered where to look next.
“They aren’t in any of the rooms up here,” she said.
“They have to be hiding outside. I have to widen my search.”
Hannah reached the bottom of the steps as quickly as he. “I’ll help you look,” she said. Her hard tone made it plain she wouldn’t take no for an answer.
He chuckled. “Don’t think you’ll stop me from giving them a good bawling out.”
She grinned, then jerked her gaze away and together they headed for the door.
They searched and called. An hour later, Jake’s frustration had given way to anger that dissolved into worry. “Where could they be?” He envisioned them sneaking into some little outbuilding and the door shutting on them, trapping them inside. But they’d gone up and down the alleys calling and listening and searched every conceivable hiding place.
“Maybe they’re staying one step ahead of us,” Hannah suggested. “If we split up we might catch them.”
“We’ll outsmart them. You go that way, I’ll go this, and we’ll meet back at the hotel.”
But another hour later, back at the hotel there were no little boys. And Hannah hadn’t returned.
He strode from one corner of the hotel to the other. He went outside again, jumped into the middle of the street, and glanced up and down the length. He started toward the railway tracks, stopped and retraced his steps. He had no idea of where to look for Hannah or the boys. But he couldn’t simply wait.
He headed back down the street. He stopped in every store opening and asked if anyone had seen Hannah or the boys. He even stepped into the lawyer’s office and asked. He knew Hannah wouldn’t play games. But where was she? Why hadn’t she come back? Was she hurt? Or worse? His stomach clenched into a twisted knot. How could the three of them disappear? How could he let this happen?
*
Hannah searched every store, checked behind each counter. She knew how mischievous the boys could be. No doubt they thought this was a fine game. But it was no longer fun. She thought of all the things that might have happened to them. Maybe a runaway horse had struck them. But the whole community would have heard about it. Maybe they had fallen somewhere and been hurt. But unless they were both unconscious they could yell loud enough to bring help from the far corners of this little town. It was almost impossible for them to get lost.
So where were they?
She stood in front of the General Store and tried to figure out what they would have done. A dray wagon rumbled to the store, stopped. The driver jumped down and went inside.
It was another wagon headed west. She’d heard one earlier in the day. A big shipment must have come in on the last train.
Wagons. West. Caves. She remembered how anxious Luke had been to see the caves. Could the boys have—
She raced into the store where the wagon driver purchased a handful of candy. “Mister. Can I get a ride with you?” She tried not to think how big the man was.
“Ride to where, Ma’am?”
“You’re headed west, aren’t you?” At his nod, she asked, “Are there c
aves out there?”
“Heard there was. Never seen ‘em though. I’m headed to Fall River. Little settlement.”
“That will do. Do you mind a passenger?”
He studied her hard, openly. But thankfully, didn’t leer. “You running away?”
“No sir. But I think two little boys might have stolen a ride on the last wagon that left from here. I have to find them.”
“Sure thing. You come along with me. We’ll find Frank and ask him if he’s seen the lads.” He held out a hand as big as a mitt. “I’m Jud.”
She gave her name, let him take her hand, and then quickly pulled away before he could squeeze the life out of it. “I need to write a note to Jake.” The storekeeper slid a piece of paper and pencil toward her. She quickly wrote a note telling her plans. “Can you see that he gets it?” She handed it back to the man behind the counter who nodded.
“I’ll take care of it.”
*
The wagon proved rough and slow enough to make Hannah grind her teeth. And Jud was talkative. She soon discovered he pretty much carried the conversation on his own, which left her to her thoughts.
She prayed she wasn’t on a foolish chase. She prayed the boys were safe. She prayed Jake would find her. If he didn’t come, she and the boys—if she found them—would be stranded in Fall River.
“How long will this trip take?” she asked Jud.
“Two hours on a good day.”
Hannah gasped. Two hours of rattling around on this hard wooden seat? Would the boys have stayed on the wagon that long? She couldn’t imagine they would. Had they even hitched a ride on the other wagon? Somehow convinced they had, she strained to see any sign of little boot tracks in the trail. She scanned the surrounding landscape. Please God, if they’re out here somewhere, help me find them.
She thought of how frightened they must be by now. If they were here and not back at the hotel, laughing at the joke they’d played on everyone. In which case, she was on a silly chase. But either way, Jake would come and get her. She could count on his sense of responsibility. As soon as the storeowner delivered the note, she knew Jake would set out.