by Schulte, Liz
“You’re a bird?” She lifted a doubtful eyebrow in a very Holden-like expression.
I laughed. “Kind of. Not really. No feathers.” I rubbed a hand over my face. “I live forever, but I don’t live one life. I have been born and died countless times.”
“How?”
“When I die, I am reborn from the ashes then dropped off with someone. I don’t get to choose who or where I go.”
“But how do you change your appearance?”
“I can shift into anything I want. I don’t know where they are going to leave me. I could be raised by humans, elves, pixies, vampires, caliban, or whatever. I have to be able to blend.”
She looked thoughtful. “Why don’t you just shift right back into you and then live your life as you would have?”
“I can’t. I have to age. I cannot hold a shift for any appreciable length of time until I am eighteen years old. When I am a baby matching my adoptive parents, it isn’t so much a shift as a metamorphosis.”
Her eyes were so bright and curious when she looked at me. “That’s why you know so much about the other races.” I nodded. “But why didn’t you recognize that I was an angel? And why were you able to keep the angel from attacking when we were out together?”
“First off, angels aren’t as common as you seem to think. I have never in any of my lives met an angel. Fact is, I never thought I would. I don’t get to die. Heaven isn’t something I ever thought I could experience. You might be the only glimpse I will ever get.” She took my hand, sadness filling her eyes. “The angel part of you knows what I am. Just like chol, angels are mostly immortal. She recognizes my essence in a way most can’t.”
“She trusts you?”
“I have no idea. When you went Heavenly warrior on those jinn, she wasn’t looking at me with love. I think she tolerates me. She listens to Holden. Whether or not she trusts any of us, I cannot say.”
“That’s because of me.”
I nodded. “She’s only here because of you. Maybe it’s time you let her have a voice.”
Olivia chewed on the side of her fingernail. “Why haven’t we talked about this stuff before now, Baker?”
I smiled. “It never seemed like the right time.”
She leaned her head back again. She didn’t close her eyes this time. Instead, she stared at the ceiling. “If something happens to me, I want our deal to stand. Take care of Holden.”
“Angel, if something happens to you, he’s going to follow close behind and there’s nothing I can do about that. I wouldn’t want to be the person to make him live without you.”
She blew out a breath, releasing her light and staring into nothing. Her faced morphed into the angel then back to her. Then it went back to the angel. They seemed to be trying each other on, but not blending. Still neither was willing to give up any part of herself so they could be one whole person. This was going to take time. Time we didn’t have. I obviously didn’t know Marge as well as Olivia or Holden, but she was a cool lady. I’d spent some time with her while pretending to be Holden and I didn’t want to see harm come to Olivia’s last anchor to her human life. None of us did. Holden and I had both been there at one point or another—I had been there on more than one occasion. Losing someone you love was never easy.
“You know what? You know her better than anyone else. Go to St. Louis and look for her,” I told her when it was clear this wasn’t going to work. Maybe sending her away by herself with the single purpose of finding her mom would open her mind.
Olivia nodded. “What are you going to do?”
“I will keep an eye on Femi. Everything here will be fine until you get back. Take care of your family first.”
She kissed my forehead. “You are a genuinely decent guy, Baker. I am glad you found Maggie.”
I smiled, but I knew I had made a mistake with Maggie. It was hard to be around Olivia and Holden all the time and not want to get caught up in a little of what they had. I liked Maggie a lot. I might have even loved her a bit. But it wasn’t going to work with us. She couldn’t be a part of this world and I didn’t want to not be a part of this world. It was good that we’d told her, but—I shook my head. It was a mistake to date a human. The fact that leaving her wasn’t the worst thing I could think of was a pretty strong sign that the type of love Olivia and Holden had just wasn’t for me.
“Who kicked your puppy?” Femi’s voice was threaded, but at least she was talking. Her color was better too.
“Reality.”
“Ain’t she a bitch?” Femi pushed herself up and swung her legs down to the floor. “You figured out you couldn’t keep the girl, huh?”
“I’ve been wearing blinders, kitten.”
“Love is in the air, Baker. There is nothing wrong with wanting a sip of that Kool-Aid. Just make sure choose the right glass.”
“You mean a non-human glass.”
She licked her lips. “I mean pick someone who can defend herself and not hold you back. You want someone who can be your partner, not someone you need babysit.” She grinned and plopped her feet up on my knee. “See. You should have come to me earlier. I give the best advice.”
I unzipped one of her lethal boots then the other. No way those shoes were comfortable. She watched me, though her expression wasn’t as guarded as it normally would have been. “You gotta stay alive to give me advice, kitten.”
She didn’t bother to correct my nickname. I used my thumbs to work up the length of her instep. Her sigh was nearly a purr as closed her eyes. “I should almost die more often if it comes with foot rubs.”
“I’ll make a deal with you,” I said.
A slow, confident smile spread over her face. “Now is the time to ask. Everything about me feels amazing right now. All tingly and new.”
“Probably a side effect of getting your lives back.”
One eye peeled open. “Say that again.”
“When Uriel healed you, he healed all of you—even the lives you have lost.”
“No shit?”
I smiled. “You wanna hear my deal?”
“Champ, you can talk about anything you want so long as you keep rubbing my feet.”
I laughed. “You can have a foot rub any time you want, so long as you keep breathing.”
She chuckled, a throat sound. “Damn, Baker, I have nine lives now. I am going to outlive you.”
I smiled though I didn’t feel it. No one outlived me. “You better.”
She nudged me with the foot I wasn’t massaging. “I thought you were going to try to get in my pants.”
I raised an eyebrow. “If I still have a chance, I’ll try again.” She winked and I put her feet back down on the floor and stood up. I kissed her on the forehead. “I’m glad you didn’t lose another life.”
“Don’t go soft on me, Baker,” she said, tilting her chin slightly up.
It would be so easy to kiss her—something I had thought about on more than one occasion—but it wouldn’t be fair to Maggie. “Wouldn’t dream of it, kitten.” I walked away, rolling my shoulders. Too much energy and nowhere to direct it.
“How bad is my car?” I made a face and she shook her head. “Son of a bitch.” She stood up and wiggled until she was satisfied she wasn’t hurt. “Damn, I liked this shirt.” She tugged at her sleeveless gray shirt decorated with two zippers, but the entire left side was tattered and red with blood.
“You want to go St. Louis?”
She shrugged. “Sure. What’s in St. Louis?” I brought Femi up to speed. “Let’s go. Do you have a car or are we ‘borrowing’ one?”
I picked up Holden’s keys from the small bowl on a table by the door. “Do you think Holden will mind?”
“Nah.” Femi swung the door open. “Shit.” Her fist darted out, connecting with something as she slammed the door shut again and locked it before I could twitch.
I reached for the gun Holden kept on the bookshelf. “Gonna catch me up?” I asked as my fingers brushed against the metal.
The door dented as they hit it, but it didn’t buckle. “Four suits. My guess? Demons.” She flipped on the locks on the door then backed into the kitchen, ripping open the drawers.
“You know how to kill a demon?” I asked, hoping she had a better idea than me.
“Call Olivia. That’s what I would do.”
I didn’t want to delay her in finding her mother, but I wasn’t sure we had much of a choice. The whole wall shook with their hits. Were they using a sledge hammer? “Find a marker,” I told her. I cleared an area around the door.
“They don’t have one,” Femi said.
“Are you sure?”
“Baker, they don’t have food. Why would you assume they have markers?”
“Don’t yell at me. I’m trying to think.” I stared at the wood floors. “A knife. They have knives, right?” One zipped toward me and landed in front of me with the thrumpt. I pulled it out and set to carving the trap into the wood.
“So we aren’t calling Olivia?” Femi asked, looking over my shoulder and at the door as they continued to hit it. “Is that really the best plan?”
“Olivia has other things to do. Try Holden.”
The banging stopped. My hand paused. Were they leaving? A few seconds later, the wall shook.
“Hey, Holden. We could use an assist back at the apartment,” Femi said as books started to fall off of the shelf.
MAGGIE WAS FINE. She had no business in this world, and she was a little too excited about the Abyss. Not to mention she was completely useless, but nice—like that mattered at all. She stared at me with wide eyes, neither of us speaking. I couldn’t really see Thomas in her at all. How did I get stuck babysitting the human?
My phone rang. I had never been happier to get out of a confectionery shop in my entire life. It was pink and frilly, filled with elaborate desserts in every possible flavor. I walked outside to take Femi’s call. As soon as she asked, I transported back, figuring Maggie would be fine. Symbols were carved into my wood floors, the kitchen was trashed, the door was bent, and something was coming through the wall. “Where’s Liv?”
“St. Louis. Looking for Marge.” Baker tossed me my gun.
“How many demons?”
“Four,” Femi said.
We didn’t have a choice. I could fight one—maybe. I didn’t even know if Baker and Femi could do that. We needed a weapon. Olivia appeared in the room as the first demon came through the wall, knocking the bookshelf out of the way. She launched herself at it in a ball of light. The other three came through, avoiding the light. I shot one in the head, knocking it back. The second knocked the gun out of my hand with speed I couldn’t match, and Baker and Femi headed off the third with knives. I hit the one closest to me in the throat and kneecapped him, but it barely slowed him down.
Demons possessing people were hindered by the frailness of the human bodies they possessed but pain wasn’t really a deterrent for them. He grabbed me by the throat, lifting me from the ground. I transported, taking him with me to the warehouse. While he tried to pull himself back together, I pushed him into the cell, locking the door behind me. I retrieved a UV light I’d bought for just such an occasion. The demon still wasn’t back together. I shined it on the partially separated demon. He sizzled and ribbons of smoke arose from the mass. I moved the light off of him and waited while he tried to collect himself before doing it again, enjoying the sound it made as it roasted.
“Having fun?” Olivia asked from behind me. I didn’t have to turn around to know it was the angel. It was always the angel when demons were around.
“More fun than I had eating cupcakes.”
Her mouth twitched toward a smile. “She wouldn’t approve.”
“But you do?”
“I do not care what you choose to do with demons.” She walked around the perimeter of the room. “Do you want me to take care of him?”
“You came, not Olivia.”
“She is emotional.”
I didn’t respond.
She nodded. “Your friends need a weapon to use against demons in case we cannot always be here.”
“Don’t I know it.”
She pulled a knife out her back pocket. “The succubus used this on us. I modified the script.” She handed it to me. “I think you will find this to be an effective interrogator.”
I took the knife. “Are Baker and Femi okay?”
Her head tilted to the side. “They were when I left. They were headed this way.”
“Thank you.” I was grateful but I didn’t want the angel to get the wrong idea. “You know, Olivia being emotional isn’t always a bad thing. Olivia and I have balance because she can think with her heart. It has saved our lives more than once.”
“You need my help,” the angel said.
“I need help from both of you. Lucifer is an enemy we cannot prepare for.”
She nodded. “We have more enemies than that.”
I raised an eyebrow.
“Death has been whispering in Olivia’s ear. She thinks she can trust him.”
It took me a second to follow. “The voice?”
The angel nodded. “He is like us, but that makes him like Lucifer too.”
“What does that mean?”
“The angel of death has a job to do that is independent of Heaven or Hell. He can do what he wants but shouldn’t be trusted. He will choose what benefits him, nothing more. Uriel suspects who the voice is but didn’t tell Olivia.”
“Why?”
She sighed. “He is in a complicated position. I left the protection of Heaven. I am fallen. They have no allegiance to me anymore, but they cannot allow me to upset the balance either. That’s what Lucifer wants. No one knows what death wants, but be aware he has her ear.” She glanced at the demon. “Lift the light if you ever want him to talk.”
I glanced over, having forgotten all about him. The parts of his jaw and throat that had formed were nearly burned away.
“You need to stop wasting time, Holden. Figure out what they want the two of you for. If it was just about making a point, they would kill you. The dream proves they don’t want that. They have other goals.”
“What about Marge? Do you know where she is?”
She closed her eyes, eyebrows pulling together. “Something is blocking her.”
“Blocking her or she isn’t there?”
She opened her eyes. “Blocking. I will keep looking.”
Baker stuck his head in the room and Olivia blinked. “How did I get back here?”
“We needed help. The angel must have been monitoring us. Four demons attacked the apartment.”
“How’s Femi?” Olivia asked.
“Femi is better than ever and that’s saying something,” she called from outside.
“Is your plan to bore me to death with your mindless chatter?” the demon asked.
I flashed the light on him and his skin sizzled like bacon. “Maybe.”
Olivia took a step toward him and he took a step back. “Who sent you?”
He looked at her, grimacing while he inched closer to her. “Who doesn’t matter nearly as much as why.”
Olivia narrowed her eyes and took a step within touching distance. “Then why?”
He leaned in close. “To distract you.”
Her head snapped back to me at the same time the demon took a swing at her. Her face twisted in pain and poured from her shoulder. Anger filled her eyes and the angel flickered there. One of them, either Olivia or the angel, grabbed him, and a moment later, he was dust. Olivia held her arm as she turned back to me. “My mom. They have her.”
Light seeped between her fingers.
“Take care of your arm and then we will find her.”
“How?” Her eyes were liquid.
I gritted my teeth. “I think it is time for a counterattack.”
Olivia nodded. She took a deep breath and the wound on her arm knitted itself back together. Outside of the cell, Femi paced around on the catwalk on high alert. I nodded for h
er to come down and she jumped, nimbly landing next to Baker. I tossed the knife to Baker, who caught it without question.
“What’s that?” Femi asked.
“The knife from the dream,” Olivia said.
I nodded. “The angel made some adjustments for demons. Olivia and I have our methods. If we are going to counterattack, you guys need a way to fight.”
“Can you make another one?” Femi asked.
Olivia looked at the design and nodded slowly. “I don’t see why not.” She held it in one hand and a ball of light collected in her other hand until an identical knife appeared in it. She gave them back. “Now what?”
“When you and Baker followed the demon back to the church, what exactly happened?” I asked. Olivia rehashed the story. “So the voice pointed it out?”
She nodded. “Why?”
“They aren’t hiding from us. I think they wanted you to find them, Liv.”
“Why?” Femi asked.
“Because they want Olivia and me for something. They have a reason why they haven’t killed us and why they took all four of us into that dream. Then the voice showing up right at the same time as all of this started, well… It doesn’t look good.”
“But the voice has helped me.”
“Has it? Or did it lead you to believe it was helping you while still getting you to do exactly what they want. Do you know who the voice is?”
“You know I don’t.”
“The angel does. She says it’s death.”
Olivia stared at me.
Baker rubbed his temple. “So what are you suggesting, boss? We do nothing?”
“No. I think Olivia’s mom is in that church. I think they are holding her exactly where Olivia can find her. She is a bargaining chip. They want something from Olivia and they are going to see what price she is willing to pay to not give it to them.”