by H. P. Munro
“Okay, bye, sorry I woke you.”
“No you’re not, have a lovely day sweetie.”
October 2012
Dan was packing away equipment following a shoot when his phone rang. Removing it from his pocket he waved at his assistant to keep going.
“Hey Jordan, what’s…Jordan?” he frowned when all he could hear were sobs and heavy breathing. “Jordan, where are you?”
“Home.”
“Stay there I’m on my way.” Dan shouted at his assistant as he grabbed his jacket from on top of a box, “You keep packing, I’ve got a family emergency.”
Screeching into Jordan’s drive Dan slammed the door shut on his car and leapt up the stairs two and at time before bursting into Jordan’s house, “Sweetie, where are you?”
Jordan came running out of the kitchen and straight into Dan’s arms, he pulled her close, “What’s wrong? Speak to me.”
Looking up Jordan gulped in air, a momentary look of confusion passed over her face as she stared at Dan, “What the hell did you do to your hair?”
“I bleached it.”
“On purpose?”
Dan scowled at her, “One crisis at a time. What’s wrong?” He allowed himself to be pulled towards Jordan’s kitchen a stunned expression soon on his face as he took in the sight in front of him. The kitchen was filled with boxes of oranges.
“What the hell? Do you have a Vitamin C deficiency or something?”
“I ordered my groceries online and I thought I was ordering weight but it turns out I was ordering quantity,” Jordan sobbed. “And now I have oranges.”
Dan looked bewildered at the reaction that the citrus fruit was generating from his friend, “You called me, at work, in tears, ’cause you have two hundred oranges in your kitchen.”
Jordan nodded, fresh tears starting to fall. “Oranges were our fruit,” she wailed.
Realization dawned on Dan as he rolled his eyes and sighed, taking Jordan into a hug, “So I guess for the rest of today we’re making orange juice and marmalade.”
“I was doing so well,” she sobbed, wiping her cheeks furiously to remove the tears that were falling freely. “It feels like for every step I take forward, I take another back.”
“Oh sweetie,” Dan sighed as he started to rock Jordan forward and back. “That just means that you can cha cha cha,” he grinned as he plunged her backwards into a dip, then kissed her forehead and brought her back onto her feet.
Jordan clung to his T-shirt and gave a small nod. Pulling back she looked up into Dan’s gentle eyes, “Thank you.” Her eyes narrowed slightly, “Seriously though what’s the deal with the hair?”
November 2012
Freya woke up, her head thumping. She could feel heat radiating from the body beside her and she closed her eyes willing her stomach not to decide to purge itself. As she lay concentrating on breathing in time with the pulse in her brain, she tried to piece together the remnants of the previous evening. She remembered coming out of the stage door and signing some autographs. Jackson had been waiting for her as had become his habit of making sure that she got home okay. Apparently Jackson took his promise to Dan to look after her seriously. But instead of going home she had decided that they should go out. To be honest, she had simply wanted to forget. Earlier in the day she’d seen some gossip site speak about Jordan dating someone and she wanted to forget…everything. So she’d drank like a woman on a mission.
Feeling like she was about to lose the battle with her stomach she moved the arm that was loosely draped over her stomach and heaved herself out of bed towards the bathroom. After she had lost the contents of her stomach and what she was pretty sure was one of her lungs, she sat beside the toilet resting her head against the wall tiles enjoying their coolness. A glass of water was placed in front of her. She heard the bath taps turn and water start to fill the tub, hands swept her hair from her face. She looked up gratefully, “Thanks.”
Jackson gave her a sad smile, “You’re welcome.”
“You stayed over,” Freya said appreciatively.
“Had to make sure you were okay,” Jackson said watching the tub fill. “You snore by the way. Do you want to talk about it?” he asked gently.
Freya shook her head, “Not right now.”
Jackson leaned down and kissed her on the crown of her head, “I’ll go put some coffee on.”
As he entered the kitchen, he dialed Dan’s number.
“Hey gorgeous,” Dan smiled shouting down the phone, one finger in his ear to block out the noise from behind him.
“Hey yourself. Where the hell are you?” Jackson asked raising his voice.
Dan moved to where it was a bit quieter, “Las Vegas.”
Jackson moved around the kitchen collecting things to make coffee, “What are you doing in Vegas?”
“My one decided that we needed a girly weekend in Vegas,” Dan shouted rolling his eyes as he took a mouthful of beer.
Laughing Jackson stuck the phone under his chin as he opened a new pack of filters, “And what happens in Vegas?”
Dan looked over to where Jordan was dancing on a table, the skirt of her black dress in one hand as she swished it in time to the music, her other hand running through her now shorter hair.
“Hopefully stays in Vegas. What are you doing up at…” Dan checked his watch. “Half seven on a Sunday morning?”
“My one decided to drink herself into oblivion and is now puking her guts up,” Jackson replied switching the coffee maker on.
Dan sighed and shook his head, keeping an eye on his tipsy friend who was still strutting her stuff.
“She saw something online about Jordan dating.”
“She’s not dating anyone Jackson. I mean she’s tried but the last one lasted about an hour. Turns out none of them are Freya. Who knew!”
Dan shook his head as he watched bouncers start to make their way towards where Jordan was dancing, “Bugger, gotta go save my one’s arse.”
Jackson shouted, “Wait Dan, what about you?”
Dan hesitated and smiled, “I’m not dating either Jackson, must dash.”
December 2012
Walking out of the stage door, Freya smiled at those that had waited. She chatted amicably with them, signed autographs and smiled for photos. When she was done she walked over towards the figure waiting for her.
“So what’s the plan tonight twinkle star?” Jackson asked putting his arm protectively around her shoulders.
“It’s Tuesday,” Freya said by explanation.
Understanding immediately, Jackson nodded. “I know. I have prepared for you,” he smiled giving her shoulder a quick squeeze.
They entered Freya’s apartment and she shrugged off her jacket. Jackson pulled her towards the sofa and sat her down. “I have a present for you,” he reached behind a chair and pulled out a wrapped parcel. Freya looked at it in surprise.
“It’s not Christmas yet,” she said confused.
Jackson smiled, “No but it’s Front Line night. So you’re going to open that, I’m going to go get you hot honey and we’re both going to watch together and while you ogle your ex-girlfriend. I’m going to do the same with the hunky soldier doctors!”
Jackson left her with her parcel which she started to open while smiling at the noise of her drink being made.
“You got me a slanket,” she yelled holding the material up.
Re-entering the room Jackson put her mug of hot honey on the table before helping her into her slanket, “Just please don’t tell Dan I got you this and don’t ever combine it with your godawful onesie.”
Freya pulled her hands free from the cloth grumbling as she leaned forward to grab her mug, “No one likes the onesie.”
She leaned back and snuggled against Jackson as he pressed play and started her recording of Front Line.
“She looks amazing,” Freya sighed as Jordan came on screen.
“Would you do it differently?” Jackson asked. “If you had a second chance I mean.�
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Looking up at him Freya could see that there was something else going through Jackson’s mind she pushed herself up and hit the pause button. She narrowed her eyes and titled her head, “Okay buddy spill.”
“I love him. Dan, I mean, I love him,” Jackson sighed. “But he’s there and I’m here.”
Freya nodded, she leaned forward and put her mug onto the table and shifted in her seat so she was facing Jackson.
“If I learned anything in the past twelve months it’s that if you have love then you hold onto it and you move mountains for it. ’cause it’s precious and wonderful and when you don’t have it anymore,” she choked back willing herself not to cry anymore self-pitying tears, “you’re left with this void that will probably take a lifetime of other experiences to fill.” She took Jackson’s hands in her own, “So if you love him, you go to him. Now!”
January 2013
Jordan was clanking pots around looking for her wok which she knew was somewhere in the pot drawer. She stopped as the sound of her piano being played in the next room reached her ears. The music was shortly joined by melodious baritone voice singing ‘Somewhere’ from West Side Story.
Stopping what she was doing, Jordan found herself drawn towards the music. In all the time that she’d known Dan she didn’t know that he could sing, never mind play the piano. She stood unnoticed by him as he continued to play and sing.
Unable to stop herself Jordan drifted forward towards Dan, her voice joining his as the music reached a crescendo.
Smiling Dan turned his head, “On your own.”
Jordan laughed and placed her hand on his shoulder as she let the music take over.
Joining Jordan for a final chorus Dan closed his eyes and let his head fall back, singing out with all that he had.
When he stopped playing, his fingers slipped from the piano keys to his lap, “Jackson’s moving to LA.”
Jordan looped her arms around Dan’s neck placing her head beside his, “That, is the best news I’ve heard for months.” She pecked Dan’s cheek and straightened up, her eyes lingering over Dan’s photograph of Freya that sat as always on top of her piano, “Let’s go out to celebrate.”
February 2013
Pulling her rucksack handle up over her shoulder Freya entered the theatre and started to wind her way towards her dressing room. En-route she smiled and greeted the crew who were moving around back stage.
“Oh Freya,” one of the stagehands called. “There’s someone in your dressing room. She said she was a friend.”
Freya raised her eyebrows. “Just in case it’s my grandmother again or some stalker who is here to steal a kidney or something, can you come knock on the door in five?” she asked looking towards her dressing room wondering who was waiting on her.
“Sure,” he replied.
She placed a hesitant hand on the door handle her heart rate increasing as a huge part of her wished that sitting in her dressing room was Jordan. She swallowed, took a deep breath and opened the door. Her eyebrows shot up in surprise as the woman turned from the dressing table at the noise of the door opening,
“Eleanor?”
March 2013
Gripping the steering wheel Freya sat debating with herself whether to get out of the car and knock on the door. Each time her hand reached the door handle she hesitated and brought it back to the wheel. She looked out of the window of her hire car towards the bungalow that she had been sitting across the street from for twenty minutes. She glanced at the clock on the dashboard wondering again whether five a.m. was too early to go and knock on the love of your life’s door. She squeezed the wheel in frustration, closed her eyes and hit her head off the head rest.
“What’s the worst that can happen? She slams the door in your face!” Freya mused speaking both sides of her argument. “You’ve flown two and half thousand miles across the country and now you’re sitting forty feet away from her home. Suck it up, Easter.”
Freya tensed her body giving herself a shake and opened her eyes.
“This could be it, your one and only chance….wait, that’s not helping.” Freya shook her head, “Way to build the pressure on yourself and you do realize that you’re talking, out loud, to yourself.” Freya put her hands to her face cursing the nerves that had frozen her to the spot, “and answering.” She took a deep breath, “Now Freya!”
She pressed the release catch on the seat belt and moved her hand to the door handle pausing as her eye caught movement in Jordan’s home. The curtains opened and a man stood bare-chested looking out across the front of Jordan’s home. Freya felt her chest constrict as Jordan came into view. Wrapped in a robe she smiled, handed the man a mug and pecked his cheek, before disappearing out of view.
Biting on her lips Freya reached down and turned the ignition key. She put the car in drive and pulled away.
***
Entering Dan’s beach house, Freya slipped her bag from her shoulder and pushed her shoes from her feet. She padded silently through to Dan’s bedroom, stopping in the doorway to smile at the vision of Dan and Jackson spooning in their bed. Despite the fact that her heart felt like a hollowed-out husk from what she had seen at Jordan’s, seeing how it had worked out for Dan and Jackson sparked a little warmth back in.
“You do know that’s really freaky right?” Dan murmured without opening his eyes or moving from his comfortable position in Jackson’s arms.
Freya laughed and launched herself towards the bed, laying on top of them both and planting loud kisses on their faces, “I know!”
Jackson shuffled over creating a space between him and Dan to allow Freya to fall between them. “How was your flight?” he asked. “We expected you here a couple of hours ago.”
“I…” Freya hesitated not wanting to admit where she had been. “I got held up getting the rental car,” she lied. “So what plans do you have for me for Spring break?” she asked brightly.
***
“So when my mother visited for Christmas, she didn’t know I was gay…she thought that Roger and I were flatmates. You remember Roger, Freya, eyes too far apart. So anyway,” Dan continued. “We moved all of my things into the guest room so it looked as if I stayed there and when she came to stay I slept on the sofa, magnanimously giving up my bed like the true gent I am,” Dan paused to take a sip of wine. “Anyway two weeks after and Roger couldn’t find the remote control for the TV anywhere and the stupid tosser thought my sweet dear mother might’ve half-inched it when she visited.”
Jackson and Freya grinned at each other listening to Dan hold court as they sat on the decking area of the beach house.
“So when I saw her next I asked her in passing whether she’d happened to remember seeing the remote control. Well the sneaky old madam replied that it was underneath the pillow on the guest bed and perhaps if I actually slept in that bed then I would have noticed it and did I honestly think that she gave two hoots where I stuck my willie. I was her son and if I ever lied to her again she’d turn my balls into earrings. Swears like a sailor my mother,” Dan finished his story with a flourish, draining the dregs of wine from his glass.
Freya hooted with laughter as she ran her fingers through her hair and looked across Dan’s deck towards the ocean. She sipped her wine and smiled over towards Dan and Jackson who were cuddling on the love seat.
“I’ve missed this about LA. The space,” she smiled gazing out across the beach, listening to the reassuring sound of the waves crashing against the sand.
“Is that all you’ve missed about LA?” Dan asked cautiously.
Freya looked over at him and gave a small laugh, “No definitely not all.”
Jackson reached forward for the bottle of wine to top up their glasses, “Are you going to see her while you’re here?”
Taking a deep breath Freya gave a sad smile, “I saw her this morning, that’s why I was late.”
She noticed the quick glance between Dan and Jackson.
“You never told me she’s dating.”
“Tania,” Freya corrected, “and nothing happened there.”
“Whatever,” Dan waved a hand. “It’s been seven months Egg, and you’re both finally starting to date. So I just thought that I’d let you move on without me playing the lesbian peace-keeping force in between. I have hung up my blue helmet.”
Freya was thankful for her sunglasses as she surreptitiously swiped away the tear that fell from her face.
***
Jordan stood at her piano, her fingers following their familiar route towards the black and white photo sitting on top of the jet-black instrument. “Hey you,” she whispered as she allowed the fingertip to follow the line of Freya’s spine. She felt two arms wrap around her from behind.
“Dan’s a fantastic photographer,” Mike said kissing Jordan’s shoulder looking at the image she was admiring.
“Yes he is,” she smiled taking a deep breath and pulling herself from Mike’s grasp. “So I’ll see you later once you’ve done the parent thing,” she said forcing herself to be cheerful.
Mike grinned, “You sure you don’t want to meet them?”
“Oooooh no,” Jordan grinned pushing Mike towards the door. “Certain.”
She stood on her tiptoes and pecked him lightly on the lips. Jordan stood in the doorway and waved Mike goodbye. When his car had pulled out from the drive she closed the door and picked up the small puppy that was her birthday present from Dan. The dog pawed her arm to get the attention it craved, turning its head into the gentle rubs she was placing behind its ear.
She and Mike had been dating for just over a month. Mike was funny, handsome, kind and gentle.
And in Los Angeles.
Everything she should want.
But Jordan’s heart wasn’t in it. She knew that for sure last night when Mike had stayed over, probably thinking that he was going to get lucky. However Jordan had chickened out and he’d had to make do with a snuggle. She had tried and for a week or two she had even fooled herself into thinking that she could be happy with someone else and then she heard a rumor about Eleanor’s new show.