I reached across the counter and touched her hand. What the fuck are you doing? “No, Violet. You were sticking up for yourself. I respect that.”
She swallowed hard. “Wow, I didn’t expect that.”
“Keep going.”
“Davis finally told me I had to make a choice. I was dumb enough to accept that. Putting my virginity on the line to keep him happy? I was going to do it, too. I was going to just give in and let it happen. Then I found out he went to visit our college and had sex with someone.”
“Fuck,” I said.
“Yeah. Fuck.”
“That’s dirty.”
“Very,” she said. “I switched colleges. I met Victoria. And the rest is history.”
“Except you searching for him online.”
She looked away. “I blamed myself. He blamed me. That’s sort of how it all ended.”
“He blamed you?”
“Was he wrong?” she asked. “I mean, truthfully. Maybe I was stringing him along. Maybe I was just afraid. I don’t know.”
“That wasn’t the first time you looked him up.”
“No. But it was the first time I saw him engaged.”
“And that hurts you.”
“He settled for someone,” she said. “Just not me.”
Now that was some real shit right there. Really real shit. Deeper than I was used to being involved with.
I took my hand from hers, not wanting to send the wrong message. I slowly reached for my keys. I needed to make my exit.
I started to back away, unsure of what the fuck I was actually feeling at that moment.
If Violet was smart she would have let me go.
Instead, she ran around the counter after me.
“Mason, what are you doing?”
“I’m not that guy.”
“What guy?”
“I’m not a replacement,” I said.
“Who said…”
I had one hand on the doorknob. I looked back at her. “I’m not him. I won’t be him. If you need me to take that sting away, then I’m your man. I’ll fuck you until you can’t remember who you are. Until you can’t remember who he is. Anything after that… not a chance.”
Her mouth fell open, in shock.
But then something really fucked up happened.
She closed her mouth. She looked me dead in the eyes. “I know why you care.”
“Oh yeah, babe? Why’s that?”
“Because the same thing happened to you.”
Just like that… she fucking figured everything out about me.
16
Cherry on Top
(Violet)
I hadn’t seen Mason in days. Again. The entire process felt like it was getting old. Something would happen between us and then he’d disappear. Or I’d disappear. If it was physical, I took off. If it was serious, he took off. Like we both knew what we wanted, but did everything we could to fight it off. That was the groundwork for a great relationship, wasn’t it?
Relationship?
That word did come to my mind a few times, but it was far from it. I told Mason the truth and he connected the dots with ease. Had I used him to take away the pain of Davis? Probably. I’d never used a man before, and considering Mason was the hottest guy I’d ever met, it didn’t feel that there was a chance that I could have possibly used him. It was more the other way around. Mason using me.
My last comment to him played through my mind as I sat with Victoria, in her apartment (my old apartment), going over some final designs and ideas.
“… so I think if we can find our core audience first…”
I wanted to know more about Mason. Who hurt him and why. He didn’t look the type to fall in love and definitely not the type to get hurt by it. I hated that he became more and more intriguing by the day to me.
“Do you agree?”
I looked at the papers our investor sent over. “Um… yeah.”
“Yeah? Did you hear a word I said?”
I looked at Victoria. “I heard parts.”
“Where’s your mind?”
“This stuff… you design the clothes. I make it so they can be matched up to people through the app. From there… it’s all foreign to me. That’s why we did this investment thing, right?”
“Yeah, right.”
“So whatever they suggest, I’m fine with. It’s their money.”
“It’s our future.”
“Agreed,” I said.
“You still thinking about moving?” Victoria asked, sliding the papers to the side.
“I’m not sure. That one place was nice. But… do I really just want to move again? I mean, my parents haven’t even seen my place.”
“They only saw this place once,” she said. “They still think you’re going to come home.”
“I know. I know.”
“Is it your neighbor?”
“Honestly, right now, I don’t know what anything is. I just want our app to launch and see what happens.”
“What happens is that we get really rich,” Victoria said with her eyes gleaming.
I laughed. “Oh, that would be amazing.”
“Believe it,” she said. “We’re close. Sure there’s nothing else you want to tell me here?”
“No,” I said.
“So the marketing plan works for us?”
“Works for me,” I said. “I like to stick to what I know.”
“Me too. I have another line of stuff I’m working on. I know I’m not a business expert, but I’d like to stay ahead of things. Seasonal and stuff, you know?”
I nodded. “You keep doing that and I’ll keep coding everything. We’ll make sure it works.”
“Just please promise you’ll be focused,” Victoria said.
“I’m always focused. Nothing can distract me from this.”
I stood up. I had been sitting for an hour. We had been talking business for that entire hour. My head was done with business.
I watched as Victoria flirted with some guy through her phone. She smiled, laughed, bit her lip. Basically setting up a date right there on the spot. And you know what she told me? She needed it. She needed to get out of the apartment and let it all off her shoulders for a night.
I needed the same thing.
The thought struck me and I had to get out of there.
“I’ll talk to you later or tomorrow,” I said to Victoria. “Enjoy your night. Stay out of trouble.”
“You stay out of… no. Go get into trouble.” Victoria grinned at me. “Please do so. Take a break. Breathe. Look at what we’ve done so far. It’s only going to get crazier.”
“I’ll take that under advisement,” I said.
I knew she was right. And maybe I did want a little trouble. My version of trouble lived right next door. But he was avoiding me because he couldn’t face his own demons.
So maybe it was time to find something else.
I believed that until I got home and saw a present waiting for me at my door.
It was a small box right outside my door. If there were any packages to be delivered the mailman would either, leave them right at the mailbox downstairs, or write a note to make arrangements to have a pickup. There was a few giant mailboxes out front too that had keys the mailman could use.
In other words, whatever was at my door was not mailed to me.
I crouched down and grabbed the box. I opened my apartment door and swung my bag around, hanging it up. I did the same with my keys. But I stood halfway in the hallway.
Something smelled very good.
I broke the little seal on the box and then lifted it open.
It was a cupcake. A vanilla cupcake with white icing. And a cherry on top.
I was confused for a few seconds until I heard a sound next to me. That’s when I saw Mason coming out of his apartment.
He stood in the hallway with a cocky grin on his face. “Hungry?”
“You left this here?”
“Yeah, I did.”
“Why? You don’t talk to me for days and then leave me a cupcake?”
Mason stepped toward me. Every single time he did that, my body was mixed with a sense of fear and a sense of need. He scared me. I hated him. Yet I demanded him from the deepest part of my core.
“You say that like it’s wrong?”
“What the hell is this, Mason?” I asked.
“A message.”
“A cupcake is a message?”
He reached forward and plucked the cherry off the top of the cupcake. I watched as he moved the cherry over his mouth as he tilted his head back. He dropped it down, closed it mouth, and pulled.
He chewed the juicy cherry without blinking and held the stem between his fingers.
“A clear message, Violet,” he said, licking his lips. “You know what I want.”
My cherry.
I squinted my eyes, wanting to hit him.
“I can’t stand you, Mason,” I said. “I opened up to you the other day, okay? You wanted to know so badly. So I told you. And then you can’t even give me something? You just storm away and then stop talking to me once I call you out on something. Now you give me a cupcake with a cherry. Because you want to fuck me. Good for you. It’s never going to happen, Mason.”
“We can start just like we did last time,” he whispered. “I’ll go nice and slow. Warm you up. I know you haven’t come since my fingers were touching your clit. I know you have to be burning and aching. I can feel it from here.”
“Fuck yourself.”
“See, that’s the thing, Violet,” Mason said. “I haven’t been with anyone since you. That’s not like me. So the cupcake isn’t a message, but maybe a little peace offering.”
“Oh, you can play nice and get into my pants?”
“Yeah. Exactly.”
“What the hell are you really doing here?”
“I just told you. I figure we can start by you climbing up on my face. I’ll eat your sweet cupcake while you eat the one I brought you.”
Oh, it was tempting. It was really tempting. I liked the no strings attached part that came with Mason. But I couldn’t stand Mason at all.
“This is a peace offering?” I asked, waving the box in my hand.
“Yeah.”
“Good. Because this is my response…”
I slammed the box and the cupcake into Mason’s chest, right at his damn heart. He barely moved, but my hand squished the box and cupcake all over him. The box fell to the floor and there were globs of cupcake and icing all over his shirt.
“This is war,” I said in a low voice.
I started to move, but Mason grabbed my arm. He pulled me right against him, squishing my chest against the cupcake on his shirt. His hand was around my back. He stared down at me.
“Fuck, babe, that was sexy,” he whispered. “You always amaze me.”
“Not going to work on me. I’m not some drunk chick at a bar.”
“And that makes you even more beautiful.”
Beautiful? Me?
I promised myself not to swoon. To show some damn restraint.
But staring into Mason’s eyes was making that impossible. There was so much more to him than what was on the outside. Like the date tattooed on his chest. What did that mean?
My lips started to quiver as he closed in on me.
Next thing I knew, he was kissing me again.
His tongue quickly exploring my mouth. My body was brought back to life, the warmth spreading from between my legs down to my toes and up through my brain. Like a blanket had been put on me, comforting me. The worst part of it all was that I tasted the cherry he ate. The cherry that represented me. What he wanted from me.
Mason stepped at me, guiding me into my apartment. My body was screaming YES while my mind screamed NO, and my heart whispered JUST MAYBE…
I couldn’t do it, though.
Even though he tasted delicious. Even though he looked delicious. Even though I wanted him. Even though I needed him.
I shut my eyes and put my hands to his rock hard perfectly defined chest and pushed him away. The kiss broke with a sexy wet sound, making me think of the wet kisses he had given me between my legs.
“Violet…”
“Go away, Mason,” I whispered. “Before we both do something we regret.”
“No, Violet, what I’m thinking I won’t regret. I don’t live in regret. I live in the fucking moment.”
“And all you want is to take me to bed. That’s your moment.”
Mason touched my face, stroking my cheek. “That’s where the moment would begin, babe.”
“Go,” I said. “I’ll call the cops if you don’t.”
Mason grinned. “You keep fighting it. I’ll be right next door if you need me.”
“I don’t need you,” I said, lying. “I don’t even want you.” A bigger lie. “Stay out of my apartment.”
“I guess I should go home and clean myself up,” Mason said. He stepped away from me. “Or better yet…”
Without hesitation, he grabbed his shirt with one hand and ripped it off his beautiful body. He rolled it up and stood there, his bare shoulders, chest, abs, and arms all staring at me.
He threw the shirt right at me, hitting me in the face. I caught it, but my eyes refused to look away from him.
“I won’t wait forever,” he whispered and then puckered up and blew me a kiss.
Mason shut the door on his way out.
I threw the t-shirt at the door.
I was shaking. Literally shaking.
Anger… lust… hate…
Mason was unlocking things in me I didn’t know were there.
I looked down at my shirt, seeing some of the cupcake smushed against me.
I used my middle finger and touched the icing. I brought it my mouth and tasted it. The sugary sweetness didn’t make me think of a cupcake. It made me think of Mason’s mouth.
And all the things he did with his mouth. All the things I wanted him to do.
I groaned and hurried to grab for my phone.
I had an idea.
To end all of this.
I opened my messages and found Victoria’s name.
I bit my lips as I sent her a message.
Don’t say a word… but find me a boyfriend. ASAP
17
A Bad Fucking Day
(Mason)
I was left to jerk off in the shower before I had to go to the shop. I didn’t do that kind of shit. A woman should have been in the shower with me. I needed to fix that situation as soon as possible. I owed Violet nothing. I didn’t need to save myself for her just like she didn’t need to save herself for me. If anything, a little old fashioned jealousy might wake her ass up a little. If not, then it was back to square one. Women screaming my name, pounding against the wall, driving Violet crazy.
That was fun.
She made it serious.
Yeah, I shouldn’t have pushed at her about her ex. That information… whatever. And asking questions about me? My past? My heart? That was a vault that would remain shut. Nothing could change that.
I rode my motorcycle to the shop to find a nice mess waiting.
Andy and Thorn were standing with a motorcycle. There was a big guy standing at the motorcycle, a black SUV parked right behind him. I saw Hunter coming out of the main office with a pissed off scowl on his face. He was followed by Dicky, who looked ready to throw a punch.
“Ah, fuck,” I whispered as I walked my motorcycle backward into its parking spot.
I climbed off and prepped myself for whatever waited.
It was rare for us to have a pissed off client. And even if there was a problem, I usually settled it in my office or at a bar.
When the big guy turned and looked at me, I recognized who he was.
A guy named Leo that we had worked with last month. He had been a pain in the ass, right to the point of holding the motorcycle hostage while he gave us a hard time when it came time to pay his bill.
“What do we h
ave here?” I asked.
“You,” Leo bellowed. “Where have you been?”
“I don’t answer to you,” I said. “I don’t answer to anyone.”
“Like hell you do. I want my money back.”
“For what?”
“For this cheap work.”
“We don’t do cheap work,” Andy said. “Come on, Leo, let’s go sit…”
“Fuck off, pencil neck,” Leo growled.
“Hey,” Hunter snapped. “I have the damn contract right here. What you wanted. What you signed for. And what you paid for.”
“Fuck what I paid for,” Leo said. “I was bullied by you all.”
“Excuse me?” I asked. “What is the actual problem here, Leo?”
“The ride,” he said and pointed. “I don’t like it.”
I looked at the motorcycle. “Seems fine to me.”
“I hate it.”
“It runs?” Hunter asked.
“I fucking rode it here,” Leo said.
“The design you wanted is there,” Dicky said.
“It’s shit work,” Leo said.
I saw Dicky step forward. I put a hand out to stop things from escalating.
“Okay,” I said. “First off, Dicky does top notch work. He’s been with me since day one. Nobody calls his work shit. Ever. You sat with him, Hunter, myself. You told us what you wanted. We drafted some designs. You said you liked them. You saw the ride, you paid for it…”
“I didn’t want to pay for it,” Leo said.
“Granted, you did.”
“You strong armed me.”
“How?”
“You stole my ride.”
I laughed. “Leo. I have better things to do in my life than deal with this. We both can agree on that.”
“Look at this mess…” he pointed to the seat.
Leo walked to the custom leather seat. He wanted a skull smoking a cigar. I had to have the seat custom made from someone I knew in Southern Cali. Took me two weeks to get it all worked out. Custom leather with custom stitching even. I ended up eating a little money on it because when I give a quote to a client I kept to it.
HATE ME: a bad boy romance novel Page 11