The Witch Within
Page 14
And then I managed to free Geira from the dark vault that he locked her in and we ran away together. I eventually learned how to fight and promised myself that I would never forgive and never forget the let-down of our men.”
The story makes me feel sick and no matter how hard I try to shake it off, the bitter aftertaste keeps crawling back. Although my body and soul utterly disagree with Edana and her loathsome plans, I understand why she is so bitter and hateful. I can’t find a way to reason with her, her past has no weak spots, it holds only grief and pain.
“God knows that we have suffered too much, but we still have our army of slaves and will finally get our sweet revenge.”
Since Edana pronounced those lines, we have remained quiet. Neither of us dares to disturb the tense silence that keeps spreading around with each and every step we make. Too long, far too long is the road into the dark.
*
I stand at the threshold of the forest, facing the murky valley of the yellow green marshes, the long gone battle fields. I notice that the two beeches nearby are intertwined and resemble the letter Thurisaz. I know what it means. I recall it precisely. It's time.
I sense creeping steps approaching me from behind and turn to see something invisible in the dark, something that is slowly manifesting into form and light. I feed the vision with my fear and therefore I'm aware that it's becoming real. I wince when I sense someone’s cold sweaty fingers climbing up my spine, but then they clutch me tight and freeze me to the ground. Edana festively opens her arms, as if calling upon some distant realms:
“We have to stop the danger that marches towards our sacred mount! We have to stop them all. Their minds must become possessed by the spirits of these restless warriors and cause them to become their own murderers! Then all others will follow. Awake our warrior slaves, sister. Open the curse!”
She turns to me, flames in her eyes; she has become completely mad now. For a while she just silently gapes at me, but then a creepy bliss takes over her face and she whispers:
“She is here.”
I want to object, but am muted. Another voice starts speaking through me without my consent and the piercing sharp voice grows louder with each word it says:
“Come, my warrior slaves, your time has come!
March out of the shadows, let me hear you hum.”
Every part of me resists the power that has banished me from my own body. The dark force rapidly takes over me. I perceive that the hands that clutched my shoulders now forcefully spread my arms. I gaze at the bleak landscape as a dark cloud spreads over my mind hastily. Through the haze I detect grinning faces coming at me from all the directions. Their glaring eyes seek a path in the mist. I've seen them before. They guided me to these lands, when all my hopes failed, and now again, the undead/unliving warriors march forward at the end of the day, humming in a familiar way:
“Why, dear child, why have you opened our realm?
We have been waiting, waiting here to die.”
I gaze at the faces, speechless, horrified. What have I done? Grandmother! Please don’t let me pass on to the dark side! Let there be guidance, let there be light! As soon as my mind utters the desperate plea, I start sensing that Algíz is near. She breaks through the mist, her face aghast. I urge her to help me, but the dark force draws its sharp nails into my arms. My limbs become heavy, like the first time I entered Edana’s cave. I'm not my own any more. I'm helpless in her freezing cold hands.
Algíz screams at me mutely, I can’t hear, my mind has been dazed.
She points her hand toward me and I notice the old scar that reads the symbol carved above our cave. I look at my own palm as it rises and behold that the same symbol, but pointing down, has appeared on it, faded, yet revived. In my inner mind, the two symbols merge into one and become the six-pointed star.
It dawns on me finally. The lines I've heard over and over again, being spoken in the common or the secret alphabet, finally reach my heart.
We are the same. We are one!
The realisation seems to have elevated my spirit, for I suddenly recall the dream I had during the first bonfire night—Algíz, her face aghast, emanating regret and despair. And so with all the verve I have left, I speak into the spreading mists:
“You are me and I am you
Come to me, I welcome you!”
Bliss veils Algíz’s previously abashed face. She disappears, or to say, she finally truly appears. Another force takes over me. Something that is familiar yet completely new to me. My arms are now lead by another invisible force, but it seems rather natural, as if it were my own power that has willed it. I spread my arms open once more, my body now resembling the symbol carved above our cave and into my hand, and with a graceful motion I reveal the dim clouds which precede the upcoming dusk. I'm stunned as I behold…
The giant female faces gazing down, each of them seeking someone on the ground. Their eyes spark as they lock with the eyes of the unliving/undead warriors, their long-lost men. And I know now, I'm aware, that they have saved each other in the end.
I start to pronounce words and lines, unfamiliar yet familiar at last. The words flow through me, deep and precise, ending with the word Thurisaz. Once all the sacred letters have been pronounced and my body has been filled with light, the faces below and above are swallowed up by the heavens. And with the spreading haze, it begins to rain. The gates have been locked and concealed, and the rain starts washing away my fear. It's finally over.
Now it's only me and Edana who stay behind. I feel at peace, whereas Edana is forlorn. She obviously cannot fully grasp what has just happened.
“What have you done, sister?”
I feel too weak to speak and so I leave her in her confusion and set off to walk among the ancient trees. I feel no remorse, no pain, only a profound relief. But Edana has not set me free. She runs me down, clutches her hands around my neck and starts to choke me. Her strength is way beyond me, I can’t shake her off, no matter how hard I try and her eyes won’t listen to me. Her hatred holds me tightly, dumping me in the mist of misery. I can think of nothing else but the fear of dying now, dying at dusk, before the soothing night welcomes the new dawn. I see the void. The void I had feared before. Dark and ceaseless as it opens up and shows that I'm not ready to die, that I must fight once more! And in this horrid moment, something emerges through the dim wall of trees. Another beast that has been waiting on me. The young wolf. His teeth glisten in the dark and his eyes focus entirely on mine. Edana spots him and lets go of me in shock. I fall to the ground and inhale the soothing air, trying to breathe properly again, hoping that I still know how to. The wolf does not hesitate any longer and at an incredible speed he jumps towards us and cuts his teeth into Edana’s neck.
The short, loud shriek breaks the intense quiet. I cover my ears and close my eyes, trying to outlive the dry storm of my mind. And then only one thought enters my mind: Run!
*
I'm running, remembering to breathe, struggling not to stop at any cost before I reach the peak. I yearn to forget, but keep recalling the shrieks, the fear, the wolf’s sharp teeth, the blood and my speeding feet. I realise I have been running the whole night, hitting into branches, struggling through the bushes and overcoming the inner fright.
I keep promising myself that I shall never abandon Algíz again, hungrily seeking the light of the new day and then…
I fall into someone’s arms. I recognise the face. Nathaniel. My enemy, my destiny, my man. I can’t believe he would betray me now; he must have been honest when he promised to rescue me. He holds me tight for a while and then he grabs my hand. We speed toward the dawn of the new day that hovers beneath the ground, waiting to finally rise. We reach his horse and get up with no further delay. I feel an extreme need to disappear from these lands, before light fills all the dark nooks. I can smell the scent of danger in the air, but I’m afraid to ask and afraid to tell, I only know that I need to get away.
*<
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We’ve been storming through the woods for a long time, but now the horse has finally slowed down. I ease my hands that have been clutched to Nathaniel’s waist and rest my head on his shoulder. Never in my life have I felt so safe, though I can’t comprehend why. Could it really be that my enemy becomes my saviour at last?
“Where are we going?”
I ask him, unsure whether I can really let go of all my fears. He replies with a calm soothing voice.
“Somewhere safe.”
I ponder whether I should navigate him to my cave, but then again, it might not be wise. Danger looms above these lands now and will probably keep spreading. I dare ask him the question I’ve been dreading to express, because I have a strong inkling that I already know the answer.
“How have you managed to escape?”
“The men sneaked into the camp the same day you left. They murdered the three sisters, but luckily the rest of the women and I managed to escape. Since I got on my horse and started riding away, only one thought has been hovering over my mind.”
He turns to me, yet remains cautious about the way ahead.
“The thought of you, trapped in the ancient battle fields.”
He then leans closer to my face and his eyes find mine.
“You know that this is not just about my guilt, Talitha, don’t you?”
I can’t bring myself to answer. Warm sensation spreads over my chest and in a while I can hear his heartbeat aligning with mine. We drum an identical song and finally allow it to chime.
As we pass the blueberry wall that surrounds my ancestral cave, I notice my deer standing along our path. His wise eyes meet mine and I can tell that he’s encouraging me on my new journey, but in a way also saying goodbye.
*
I have not abandoned Algíz since
For I was her and she was me
I do not fear looking into the dark
For I have become a sorceress of light
The End