by S. Moose
“I see,” he smirks and shakes his head. “Poor sex life?”
“I guess you can say that. With Shawn, it wasn’t like before. We were more like friends than dating. Our sex life was nonexistent and when he brought up a future with me, I panicked. I didn’t know what I wanted, got scared, and left.”
“How could your sex life be nonexistent?”
“Is that all you got from my story?”
“You said sex. That’s an important word. When a man hears the word sex, everything else goes out the window.”
I roll my eyes. “Shawn got busy and sex wasn’t as important to him. He didn’t need it, and I thought he was cheating on me.”
“What man says sex isn’t important? Hell, if I don’t have sex on a regular basis I get sexgry.”
“Sexgry?”
He laughs. “Like hangry. Sexgry.” He wrinkles his nose and kinks his brow. “You know, that word is awesome.”
“Whatever.” I don’t agree with him. “So yeah. I loved him, but I wasn’t in love with him.” I can’t tell him the truth. Not yet. We need to build our friendship first and make that foundation solid.
“Oh, okay. I mean, I guess that makes sense.” He pauses for a moment as if he’s tossing around a conflict in his head. His body is tense and he has an unreadable expression. “I have a lot going on with work. You can’t stay here. Will has a house too, so staying with him is better.”
“Now? You’re kicking me out?”
“No,” he says. Turning around he pushes himself up from the pool and I follow him. He faces me again and I’m waiting to hear his explanation. “You can stay here a little longer, but you need to go to Will’s today.”
“Wait, why?” I stammer, not understanding his quick change. “Are you mad at me? Did I do something wrong?”
He kinks his brow. The way he’s looking at me is making it hard to breathe. I love how his eyes see me, and the feelings are erupting inside. No matter how much time has passed, he’s still the one who makes me weak and the one I want. All the memories we shared, even though years have passed, nothing will take away how I felt, and how I still feel to this day, at this very moment. I want to feel his lips against mine and forget the entire world.
“Talk to me, please. I’d like to be friends again and I know we can never have what we had before. When you look at me I feel like you don’t see me. I feel like you see past me and I don’t matter.”
“You were always more. You are always more.”
Instead of responding, I smile and he smiles back. Hearing him tell me I’m more means so much to me. It’s a start and I’d rather take that than hearing his hate for me.
“I don’t want you to hate me . . .”
Troy immediately stops me. “I don’t hate you. Even if I tried, I can never and will never hate you.”
My heart feels like it’s going to beat out of my chest. Hearing this from him is making me experience his words and feelings. Needing to feel his arms around me again, I stand up close to him. He smells so good, like mint and fancy cologne. Not the type of cologne you can spray on like deodorant. This smell is very GQ-posh, alpha, and sexy. All man. The heat between our bodies radiates and I feel weak in my knees. I want to collapse in his arms, look him in his beautiful brown eyes, and hear him say he doesn’t hate me again. Troy stares deeply into my eyes and it’s not the angry glare from before. It’s mysterious and full of wonder. He leans in closer to me and I take a deep breath, hoping he’s going to do what I want him to do. Fluttering my eyes closed, I feel his hands on me and soon. . . .
I’m thrown backwards in the pool.
“Troy,” I scream, spitting out water, and wiping my face. “Game on, asstwat! Game freaking on!”
Chapter 7
Troy
“You will be relieved to know I haven’t texted Will.”
“And why will that make me feel relieved?”
“Because,” she sits down on the couch next to me and tucks her legs under her ass. “This gives us a chance to really talk.”
I wipe my hand down my face. I don’t think I can stand another talk. I’m not ready to bring up the feelings I’ve buried. I need to plan what I want to say to her and not allow her to touch me or make me forget the broken promise and the lost years.
Coming home from the doctor’s office, I expected her to be gone. When I walked inside she was dancing in my living room. I stood quietly and watched her shake her ass and sing along to Confident by Demi Lovato. It was quite a show and I had to laugh when she let the music take over her body. She belted each word beautifully and performed as if there was an audience. When she saw me watching, she winked and kept singing and dancing.
Unable to stop myself from touching her hair, I twirl a strand between my fingers I lean in closer to her. “You’re right, I should be relieved you’re still here. As much as it’s fucking with my head to have you here, I admit I’m relieved.” Leaning in closer, feeling her breath near my lips, I whisper, “I’m not the same man, sweet Charlotte. I’m cold and dark. Keep your distance from me. Having you here in my home is driving me crazy. Last night, thinking about you in the next room made me hard and, God, I wanted you so bad.”
“We can have that,” she whispers and cups my face with her soft hands. “We can start over. I’m back, Troy. I’m back and I’m not leaving you.”
“Stop. I can’t,” I grit out and quickly get up to head upstairs. When I’m safe in my room I look outside my window and hang my head. I can’t deny how happy I am to have her here. And I can’t deny the hurt and regret I feel. I’m not mad at her for making the choice she did. I get it. She’ll do anything and everything for her brother. They only have each other left and they depend on one another. Maybe that’s why it was easy for me to let her go. Part of me doesn’t want to stand in the way between her and Will, and the other part doesn’t give a shit.
Fuck.
Being close to her and almost feeling her lips on mine makes my chest tight. If I have one taste of her, I know I’ll be fucked.
It’s still early and I’m not going to be holed up in my room the whole night. Taking out my phone, I text Carter and tell him to meet me at MacGregor’s for beer and pool.
“Troy,” Will calls out from the pool table in the corner of the bar. He gives me a manly one-arm hug and I shake hands with Sal and Carter, two of our other friends. I look at Carter and he gives me a questioning look. Fuck. I’m out with Will while his sister’s relaxing at my house and I don’t have the balls to tell him, because for one, I need my balls.
Heading my way over to Carter, I look at Will and see him taking shots with Sal. “Charlotte’s at my house,” I mutter.
We met Carter and Sal at a fitness convention after a few months of living in Rochester. The two brothers helped us get clients from their gym set up with meal plans, and we’ve been working together ever since. I trust Carter more than Sal. One drunken night I told him all about Charlotte and how much I missed her. His wife, Jane, told me to chase her and do anything to get her back. I couldn’t. I didn’t have the strength to get hurt again.
“Oh, shit,” he says. “Here? In Rochester? At your house?” I nod. “You need a shot, my man.”
“That I do.” Carter hands me a shot and I take it. “I’m fucked, man.”
“Yeah,” he slaps my shoulder. “Yeah, dude, you really are. On another note, Avery’s getting cuter and misses her Godfather.” He shows me a picture of my princess and I smile. Even though I don’t want kids and can’t image being called Dad, Avery is the closest to a daughter I’ll have.
“How’s Jane?”
“Good,” he smiles. “You know she asked about you the other day. Do you think you can give us a good deal with your workouts? She’s feeling depressed and can’t get rid of the last ten pounds. I tell her she’s beautiful the way she is, but she doesn’t listen to me.”
“No problem. Have her email me.” I don’t tell Carter I’ll do it for free. He doesn’t like anything given to
him so I’ll make a deal with Jane. She’ll make me her famous chili once a week and I’ll help her out. To me, that’s a fair deal.
“Ladies, if you’re done chatting, we have a game to play,” Will calls out.
“So listen here,” Sal tells us. “I had this fine-ass honey last night. My damn, she did things to me I didn’t even know we could do. Three rounds my friends.” Sal puts up three fingers with a smirk on his face. “And she’s coming over tonight with another fine-ass honey. I’m in heaven.” He kisses his fingers and raises his hand in the air. “I’ve been taking this herb that’ll help me last all night.”
“A pill?” Will laughs.
“No,” Sal counters. “Not a pill, it’s a powder, you fucker. You mix it with hot tea and it’s supposed to help your endurance.”
Carter’s settled and has a great family, while Sal is Rochester’s biggest manwhore, and I make a mental note to keep Charlotte out of his hands. He has no shame and will sleep with anyone with a pussy.
I nod and order a few rounds of shots. I’m going to need vodka to get through tonight.
“How’s everything with Andrea,” Will asks.
“Broke up with her this morning.”
“Damn, so she’s free,” Sal shouts, raising his arms in the air, sporting the biggest grin on his face. “I know we’re best friends, but man . . . please let me tap that.”
“If you want chlamydia, be my guest.”
“What?” The guys start shouting out questions and I explain what happened and hear them groaning and holding their balls.
“Damn, that’s a shame,” Sal shakes his head.
“Fucking whore,” Will states. “You guys were always together. When the hell did she have time to cheat on you?”
“I didn’t go with her to the city during her last few shoots,” I shrug. “It doesn’t matter. I don’t give a shit and I’ve moved on. No point wondering about it.”
“Good man,” Carter tells me. “Plus you have other things to worry about.”
I quickly turn my face to his and have to calm myself down before I knock him out.
“What things,” Will asks.
“Nothing. Carter doesn’t know what he’s talking about.”
“Oh. Okay. Whatever. Let’s drink and play.”
After a few hours at the bar, I head out and get in my car needing to get home. When I walk in, I lock the door and head upstairs to my room. The smell of Charlotte hits my nose and I instantly think of her and immediately force her out.
She’s not mine and will never be mine.
Chapter 8
Charlotte
The next morning, Troy and I have breakfast outside as he fills me in more about his business. I love listening to him talk and see his light shine when he talks about his clients.
“I’m so proud of you, Troy.” Reaching out to touch his hand I see a brief smile on his face and then he retreats to the Troy I don’t like.
“Call Will.”
“I need a job as soon as possible,” I blurt out. “I’m avoiding Will because he gave up his life for me and made sure I got a good education and landed a good job,” I lower my voice. “Telling him I left Michigan, and my job, won’t make him happy. Sure, I left with good reasons, but he won’t see it that way. I can’t disappoint him.”
“I may be able to help you out with that,” Troy says and guides me inside his house. “My friend is looking for a spa manager and you majored in business with communications, right?” I nod, surprised he still remembered my major. “I’ll call him now and get you in to see him.”
“I know I can handle the spa world. It shouldn’t be too hard. I was a manager back in Michigan and I’m a faster learner too.”
“Will told me about your job so this should be a simple move for you.”
“You kept up with what was going on with me?”
I see him shrug and he doesn’t answer. “I think you’re going to rock the shit out of this position and he’s going to love having you.”
“Okay,” I blush. “Thank you.” Our faces are so close together. I want to feel his lips on mine. Not wanting to think, I lean in and kiss the corner of his mouth. Better than nothing. “Thank you again.” Slipping out of his embrace, I head upstairs and decide to take a nap, and well, relieve myself.
When I wake up from my nap it’s almost three in the afternoon. Slipping out of bed I make sure everything is packed in my suitcase and look around the bedroom. Part of me wants to beg Troy to let me stay with him. Part of me wants to show him how great we’d be together and I can help him around the house. If I live with him, it’ll give us a better chance to reconcile our differences and move on from the past. I hate knowing Troy doesn’t want me in his house. It doesn’t make sense. When we were younger he’d do anything for me. Now, it’s a complete twist.
A knock on the bedroom door grabs my attention. Troy walks in and hot damn. He’s wearing faded fitted jeans and a blue polo. The outfit suits him and hugs every delectable muscle. How can a simple outfit be this sexy?
As I study him with my eyes, I realize how much he’s changed. Before, he was sweet, tender, and never made me feel little. Now, it’s a different story. His body changed since I last saw him. His bulging muscles aren’t overly big, but enough that I want to lick his arms and fall asleep on him. I wonder how easily he’d be able to pick me up and fuck me against the wall.
Shit. I can’t think this! The man just broke up with his girlfriend and I just broke up with Shawn. I need to give this time. I need to make sure Will won’t kill me for leaving Michigan and focus on work. I will not be a rebound. If he wants me, he’ll have to tell me. Even though I want him, that doesn’t mean I’ll go for it. Part of me is scared he’ll reject me.
From looking at him, I see the intensity in his body and eyes. The way he’s looking at me with lust and desire, that doubt quickly goes away. I want to peel back his layers, and get to the center of who Troy Harding is and what he loves most. I used to know him, but things change. People change.
“Jason’s at the spa now. He said it’s cool if we stop in so you can meet him and fill out paperwork. We can get lunch after your meeting, and you need to see Will. I can’t let you hide from him.”
“Yes, sir.” His eyes darken, and shit, the ache and wetness come back in full force. He’s intimidating and controlling. I think I like this about him.
“Come, Charlotte.”
Oh, how I want to.
We get in his sleek silver BMW and head to Pittsford. The road we’re on is so busy right now and the traffic is ridiculous.
“I’m loving this weather!” I smile as the window rolls down. Turning off the AC, he looks at me and follows what I’m doing.
“Aren’t you scared the wind will mess up your hair?”
“It won’t be hard to fix my hair before we go into the spa. I love driving with the windows down,” I laugh and shake my head. “Wait, was Andrea a little high maintenance?”
He groans. “She’s the definition.”
I burst out laughing. Tears are coming down from my eyes. “Well . . . even though I can be girly, I still like the wind blowing through my hair.”
He doesn’t respond and focuses on driving. I look around and notice there are restaurants all over and quite a few businesses.
“What’s that?” I point at a plaza.
“Pittsford plaza. There’s a grocery store with a lot of other businesses.” Troy explains some of the places in the plaza and how big Wegmans is here in Rochester. “You’ll like Trader Joe’s too. All natural foods. On Sundays I shop at both places.”
“Oh, wow. Can’t wait.”
Troy makes a left hand turn into another plaza and I notice the sign of the spa. “We’re here. You ready?” Checking my hair in the mirror, I fluff it a little so I don’t look like a hot mess.
“How do I look?”
“Good,” he clears his throat. “Ready?” I nod and we walk out of the car and into the spa.
Walking in
, two girls at the front desk stand up with smiles. The soft, classical music is soothing and I love the environment.
“Hi, how can I help you?” I look at her nametag.
“Hi, Megan. I’m here to see Jason. My name’s Charlotte.”
“Oh! It’s so good to meet you. He told us about you.” I watch her look at me and discreetly look at Troy. Both girls are blushing and I have to roll my eyes.
The door swings open and in walks a sexy guy with shoulder-length hair with broad shoulders, a little scruff on his face, and really nice brown eyes I’ve ever seen. His towering six-foot frame comes towards us and I have to swallow my tongue. Sweet lord, this is my boss.
“Hey, man,” he says to Troy and they shake hands. Turing his head to me, he gives me his panty-dropping smile. “Hey, I’m Jason.”
“Charlotte. Nice to meet you.”
“You too. Why don’t you guys come to the office and I’ll get you all set.”
We follow him into the office and Troy closes the door. I look around and see various awards. The spa was named in the ‘top one hundred best places to work’ and has reached one million dollars in sales back in 2013.
“Troy filled me in with your background and history. I trust him and as long as you’re okay with the position, we’ll talk more about the responsibilities and get the paperwork done.”
“No questions on my end right now. I’m sure I’ll have a few after you’re done explaining the position.”
“Well, just let me know. I have to go over this shit with you for HR. But I’m one of the owners. The other three you won’t see as much, so you’re going to mostly be working with me, unless we have our weekly meetings.”
“Sounds good.”
“As a manager I’ll need you to work every day and you’ll have Sunday off. Since you are salary, if you need to flex your time, that’s fine. The days I really need you here are Monday and Friday for meetings.” I nod my head and wait for him to explain more about the position. “The spa needs to stay at or around twenty-five percent with closing sales and retail. We exclusively sell certain products and you’ll learn all of this as you work. I can start you at forty-five thousand a year. Does that sound good?”