With a final shove, Edwyr finally managed to create a gap big enough for him to squeeze through, which he with some difficulty proceeded to do. Breathing in and out a few times, fresh air filling his lungs, he shook his head at how difficult this had been. This door was clearly not used often.
As he looked around his dark surroundings, he was surprised it was so late already, but he supposed he shouldn’t have been. He and Wyn had been talking for a very long time, and it was simply difficult to tell time within the halls of that…temple? Edwyr had forgotten to ask what he should call the place.
He was now standing among the ruins, with a stone wall behind him. He went to somehow pull the door closed, but when he saw how seamless the rough, rocky surface blended with the door itself, as if it had been cut directly from the same stone, he decided against it. It was only a little open, after all, and he didn’t want to risk not being able to find it again.
Besides, he doubted this conversation would take long, and he didn’t want it to take long, either. It already hurt to just think about it, and the more he imagined what was about to happen, the less he wanted to do it. But he was sure that telling his friends goodbye, at least for a while, would be more painful for him than for them, at least, and that did make this a little easier.
Trying not to think about this further, he began walking among the ruined, stone buildings, looking around and squinting into the distance in hopes of seeing a campfire that would show him where Lanna and Arbane were. He could only see silhouettes of the dark structures, and even though he knew he’d seen at least some of these ruins before, he had no actual idea where he was.
Still, he walked in the direction he hoped the main road was located without stopping to try to figure this out, afraid that if he did he might change his mind. But thankfully it didn’t take him long to notice a light towards the end of the ruins, relatively far away from the main road. He could only see the walls of broken buildings illuminated with a yellow, flickering light, but it was so dark it stood out like a beacon.
Sighing, Edwyr began to walk faster, wishing that he had Tempest with him. Even though it would be completely unnecessary to bring her with him, she would carry him to the fire much faster. And he had always found her presence calming.
As he slowly but surely approached the fire, he realized how loud his footsteps seemed in the eerie silence as he tried to pick up on any conversation the two humans, and possibly Feyrith, might be having. But there was nothing, except for a deathly silence.
Finally, as he walked around one of the ruined buildings, he spotted both Lanna and Arbane, sitting by the fire and roasting something over it. It looked like a large lizard of some kind, skewered on a stick. Edwyr felt his stomach turn. They both looked so sad and worried.
He hated that he’d caused that. It was too late now, but it could have been easily avoided if Wyn hadn’t insisted on being so secretive. For all Lanna and Arbane knew, Edwyr had disappeared or had been killed, and he knew they cared about him, so of course this would bother them.
Suddenly angry with himself for not thinking of coming here sooner, he did his best to not look too awkward as he approached, clearing his throat.
Lanna and Arbane both flinched, immediately jumping to their feet and raising their arms, prepared to defend themselves, only for their expression to turn to absolute shock.
“Edwyr?” Lanna breathed. Before the elf could even react, she was hugging him tightly, with Arbane replacing her as soon as she pulled away.
“Where the hell have you been, man? We’ve been looking for you for hours!” Arbane said much too loudly, making Edwyr cringe. He sounded relieved, even happy, but that made Edwyr feel all the worse.
“I…met with some people,” he replied, not sure how much he was willing to reveal.
Both of the humans’ relieved expressions quickly turned confused and suspicious. As Edwyr had assumed would happen. “Wait, what? What people?”
“Elves. There are other elves here,” Edwyr replied, looking away as it became too uncomfortable to look into either of his friends’ eyes.
“Yeah, we know. One sent that mist on us. And someone attacked Feyrith!” Arbane exclaimed, his eyes wide as he gestured wildly.
Edwyr wasn’t exactly sure what to think of that, but just the mention of Feyrith put him in an even worse mood. It was ridiculous to get annoyed over them mentioning the other elf so soon after seeing Edwyr again, but it annoyed him anyway.
“That mist was there so I could leave without you following.”
While Lanna blinked at him, Arbane frowned. “Follow you where? And why not tell us?”
Arbane was starting to a little irritated at this point, while Lanna still seemed to be trying to give Edwyr the benefit of the doubt, even though he did deserve them being angry with him for not talking to them sooner.
“Yeah, you know you can trust us, right?” There was hurt in Lanna’s eyes, and it was awful to behold.
“Yes, of course.” Edwyr sighed, rubbing the bridge of his nose. “It wasn’t my decision to leave you in the dark.”
The two humans exchanged a look, now concerned again. But Edwyr didn’t let them ask whatever they had been about to ask.
“Listen.” Edwyr sighed again. Why was this so hard to say? “They told me they can give me magic.”
Both of his friends gaped at him then, shocked into silence. As they should be. It was still hard to believe if he was completely honest with himself. He would get magic. It was beyond anything he’d ever dreamed because he’d never thought it would actually happen. He’d thought it was impossible, but not anymore.
“What?!” came a belated reaction from them both at the same time. It had always been remarkable how they managed to mirror each other so much.
“Magic?” Arbane repeated, his mouth still open in shock. “Like…you’ll be able to do spells?”
“Yes, exactly.”
Lanna was now grinning, which made Edwyr’s stomach flip. But Arbane didn’t seem to share this enthusiasm, judging by his scowl.
“You said that’s not possible,” Arbane argued. Edwyr had expected them to be a bit doubtful of Wyn’s offer. After all, he was still a little doubtful himself. But he hadn’t thought it would be so fast.
“Yes, I thought so. But I was wrong,” Edwyr replied, cursing himself for the defensive tone he’d used. He hadn’t meant to come across that way. Lanna and Arbane exchanged another look before Lanna spoke in the usual soothing tone she used whenever she wanted to defuse tension.
“Look, Edwyr, we’re sorry for being suspicious, but you gotta admit, this is all very sudden. First, you disappear, then Feyrith does, and now you’re telling us that—”
“Wait, Feyrith disappeared?” Edwyr had thought the elf was simply somewhere else, perhaps off exploring the ruins for the source of magical energies, which now that Edwyr thought about it was probably the Infuser. But he hadn’t thought Feyrith had disappeared.
“Yeah, shortly after you did. We separated to find you and….” Lanna sighed, worry filling her eyes. “We just found his squawker, all drowsy.”
She looked over at Feyrith’s squawker as she said this. The beast sleeping on the ground between Stomper and Aggra, who were pressed up against its sides protectively. A drowsy squawker wasn’t something Edwyr had ever seen before.
“Did he run into some bandits again?” Edwyr couldn’t help but dismiss the issue, though he probably shouldn’t be joking about Feyrith’s disappearance like this. But even realizing that, he hadn’t expected his friends to glare at him for it as fiercely as they did.
“That’s not funny, Edwyr,” Lanna snapped, sighing immediately after as she rubbed her eyes. “Look, if whoever summoned that mist did something to Feyrith—”
“Impossible. I was with him until now.” Edwyr had thought that him telling his friends about getting magic—something they knew was and always had been his biggest wish—would have more of an impact on the conversation, but it seemed as though th
ey were more concerned about an elf they met a few days ago, who for all they knew had simply gotten lost. This didn’t have to mean anything, especially given how incompetent Feyrith was when it came to survival skills.
“Well, you said there was more than one elf here, right?” Arbane continued, keeping his tone forcefully calm and slow. “So what if someone else attacked Fey?”
Edwyr tried not to grit his teeth at both the nickname and the implication Arbane was trying to get across. “Are you trying to suggest that this is a trick?”
Lanna grimaced, clearly realizing that the direction the conversation was going was making Edwyr angry, but if anything, Arbane just glared harder. “Yeah! I mean, don’t you find it a bit suspicious that—”
“No! No, I don’t,” Edwyr snapped back at him. He pointed his index finger at his friend, his teeth gritted so hard it almost hurt. “Do you not understand how important this is to me? Why are you trying to ruin it?”
“Ruin it?!” Arbane repeated, sounding almost outraged. “We’re trying to keep you safe, you….” He huffed, cutting himself off before he could likely call Edwyr a colorful insult of some kind. “You can’t tell me you trust these elves. When something sounds too good to be true, it probably is. You said the Council—”
“They’re not with the Council. And besides, you can’t understand this.”
The hurt, angry glare Lanna shot him then made Edwyr’s heart clench, but he stood his ground. “Why? Because we’re human?”
Edwyr sighed, feeling some of his anger turn into tiredness. “Yes. Because you are human.”
“That never mattered before,” Arbane argued, now also looking more hurt than angry.
“It has always mattered,” Edwyr replied, keeping his voice soft and emotionless. Perhaps it had only ever mattered to him. He wouldn’t be surprised. After all, Arbane and Lanna had plenty of other humans to be around—they wouldn’t understand how it felt to be separated from their people the way Edwyr had been, and therefore wouldn’t have much of a reason to feel the way he did. And he hadn’t done much to remind them of his differences, either, since he wore the same clothes as them and had cut his hair short.
He didn’t regret doing it. It had brought him a tangible kind of separation from the Council at the time, but now there was a pang of sadness in his heart when he thought about it.
“I didn’t come here to argue with you,” Edwyr said, grateful that the two had left him enough space to continue. “I came to say goodbye.”
As their eyes widened, Edwyr raised his hand to stop them from asking the obvious question. Of course, they didn’t know what he was talking about. Edwyr only hoped he would be able to explain it well enough for them to understand. “The other elves. They made me an offer. One that I will accept. But it means I won’t be coming back with you.”
For a second, Lanna and Arbane stared at him in shock, not saying anything. Edwyr wished he could explain it more clearly to them—to make them understand why this was so important to him—but he couldn’t. Wyn wanted all of this to remain a secret, and Edwyr wanted to respect that.
“I might come to Sunwood eventually. But not now.”
“So you’re just leaving us? To join some elves you met a few hours ago?” Arbane said, shaking his head in disbelief. “Who’s gonna help us protect Sunwood, then?”
“Any other human capable of combat,” Edwyr replied, sounding exhausted even to himself. So far this had been a whirlwind of emotion. “You never needed me specifically to protect Sunwood. And like this, you will be with your own kind, and I with mine.”
“Since when does anyone care about that?” Though she looked angry, tears were gathering in Lanna’s eyes. She didn’t let them fall, blinking rapidly, but it still made Edwyr’s heart clench.
“I always cared. And now I finally get a chance at a life worthy of an elf.” The moment the words left his lips Edwyr realized how this must have sounded to his friends, and that they would take an offense at this, but the damage had already been done.
“Are you saying protecting human lives is beneath you?” Arbane asked, his tone sharp and dangerous. Edwyr sighed again. Arbane was twisting his words, and yet he couldn’t help but agree with it to an extent. Protecting humans was a worthy cause, but not in the incredibly inefficient way he’d been forced to do it.
“No, of course not. But the way we have been doing it is.” The humans’ glares barely lessened, but Edwyr wasn’t going to back down. “Just imagine how much more I could do with magic at my disposal.”
“Yeah, or this could be a trap!” Arbane practically yelled at him.
“Go home,” Edwyr told them instead of continuing this argument. They wouldn’t reach any kind of understand anyway—that much was clear by now. Though he hated how hurt they looked by what he’d just said. “I’m grateful you decided to come with me here, but it’s time you went back. Sunwood needs you.”
Lanna scoffed, avoiding Edwyr’s gaze, but she said nothing. Arbane, though, was staring right into Edwyr’s eyes.
“Fine. If you don’t want to come back, I’ll respect that. But we won’t leave until we find Feyrith. We agreed to help him get here and back, and we’ll keep that promise.”
Edwyr resisted the urge to say any of the things that came to mind and just gave a nod, trying not to show how he felt about this idea. “Very well.”
A moment of silence followed, which stretched on for long enough for Edwyr’s anger to leave his heart and give way to a wave of sorrow and regret. He hadn’t wanted to end things like this, but he supposed he should have known it would go badly. He hadn’t imagined there would be yelling, but he couldn’t say he was surprised either.
As the silence became stifling, he spoke again, despite his better judgment. He simply felt a need to explain himself, despite knowing that the two weren’t likely to listen. “I appreciate the time we spent together. But my destiny lies elsewhere. It always has.”
“Sure,” Arbane replied, brushing him off. He was now pointedly looking away, clearly trying to imply that he was done with this conversation. And Edwyr supposed so was he. Especially once Lanna looked up at him again, her eyes dull and resigned.
And then she spoke, her voice so flat that Edwyr couldn’t tell if she was being sarcastic or sincere. “I hope you find whatever it is you’re looking for.”
He couldn’t help but feel like he was being mocked, but he wouldn’t let Arbane and Lanna’s dismissals and suspicions change his mind. They had been often right in the past, but not this time.
“I did.”
22
It took Feyrith a moment to remember what had happened once he woke up. He was too busy panicking about his current situation of being bound, gagged, and…had he been blinded? No, he wasn’t blind—there was something tied around his eyes.
Feyrith swallowed thickly, biting down on the cloth in his mouth and pulling on the cuffs binding his arms to what felt like the arms of a chair. He couldn’t tell since he couldn’t see, but it felt that way. He was sitting down, and his ankles seemed to be tied down to something as well.
But knowing his situation hardly helped him feel calmer. If anything, now he was even more scared. He knew they should have left immediately after that mist had cleared. Now he was at the mercy of a deranged elf and with no idea what she might want from him.
His only solace was that at least there was no shame in being captured this time. He’d had no chance. Even without a staff of her own, the other elf had been much more powerful, especially with combat magic. She’d used spells Feyrith had never even heard of. There was no way he could have won, and he’d had very low chances of successfully running away from her as well.
Reminding himself of this didn’t help him feel better either.
“Oh, he’s awake. Good, I was getting tired of waiting,” came the irritated voice of the elf who had attacked him, making Feyrith flinch. He hadn’t been aware she was present at all. Everything had been so quiet. Or perhaps he was simply havi
ng a difficult time listening to anything other than his heart beating hard in his ears.
“Genrith, please,” said a deeper, irritated voice, clearly belonging to a man. Was this another elf? Of course, it didn’t have to be the case, but it was possible. So how many were there, actually? Feyrith fought against his bindings again as his heart beat even faster. The shackles cut into his skin, but he didn’t let that stop him. “I am very sorry about this. This has to be done while you are conscious, and in touch with your magic. But you must understand this is for the good of all elf kind.”
Feyrith stopped struggling as he realized the man was talking to him directly. The man—clearly truly an elf, judging by what he’d just said, and the way he was speaking—sounded regretful almost. If anything, that made Feyrith even more frightened. What were they going to do with him? He assumed it would be something concerning his magic if he needed to be in touch with it, but that didn’t narrow the possibilities down much.
“Are you going to have this little monologue every time we do this?” the female elf asked, her tone dark and annoyed, to which the other elf scoffed.
“Yes, it is the least I can do, considering.”
“He won’t remember this. You only do it to ease your guilty conscience. Now let’s be done with it.”
He wouldn’t remember what? Were they going to take away Feyrith’s memories? The clear implication here was that this, whatever was going to be done to him, had been done to other elves before him, and yet no one had ever reported anything about meeting rogue elves as far as Feyrith knew. Was that why? Because they didn’t remember afterward?
But surely they would have come back to Aendor, even without remembering. So how much were these elves going to erase?
Feyrith swallowed down a scared whimper when he heard the male elf sigh tiredly. “I…I am very sorry.” Feyrith tried to use all his remaining strength to break free as he felt fingers brush over his wrists. And then he yelped as something pricked at them. It didn’t hurt much, but immediately a terrible cold started to seep into him as if flowing into his very veins.
The Circles of Magic Page 24