by kj lewis
We finish eating. Smith and Stefanie leave to spend the last leg of the flight together before getting back to reality. Graham and I chill and enjoy another bottle of wine before having sex on a few of the surfaces that we missed on the flight over.
When we finally arrive home, I can’t believe how good it feels. Graham and I make a beeline for Olivia’s room to see it in person. It’s beautiful, not too frilly or girly. Just the right amount of Olivia and the right amount of us. Her room at the beach house is more relaxed and fitting for living by the ocean. These are her city digs.
“When did you have them do this?” Graham asks, walking over to a group of pictures on the wall.
“I love this one. You were so caught up in Olivia you didn’t even know I was there.”
“They’re really great.”
It’s just past midnight in New York. We try to make ourselves go to sleep to help the impending jet lag, but neither of us is sleepy. It’s November and the cool air has turned cold. We dive into the heated pool and swim under the watchful eye of the buildings around us before making love in our bed for the first time in three weeks. Just before dawn, sleep finally claims us.
The next day Jules calls while Graham and I are heading out. She wants to talk about some of her latest designs.
“How was your trip?” Jules asks.
“Wonderful. I can’t wait to tell you about it and show you the pictures.”
“I can’t wait to hear about it. What do you have going on today?”
“Graham and I are trying to get back into the swing of things. He’s not going to the office since it’s the weekend. I think we are going to spend the day doing some shopping for Olivia.”
“That sounds like a plan. I do have some new designs I’d like you to see, but it can wait.”
“You were busy while I was gone. Graham and I can swing by on our way. A few minutes won’t through off our plans.” I look to Graham and he nods telling Biggie Smalls to stop by Adam’s.
“Are you sure? I hate to distract you, but I’m stuck on one design and would love to work on it today if you could help point me in the right direction.”
“No problem. I’m pulling up now.”
“I’ll probably be about fifteen minutes,” I tell Graham outside of Jules and Adam’s place. “Want to wait here or come up?” Graham opts to come up. He wants to talk to Adam about an email he’s unhappy with.
“Surprise!” our family and friends yell when we enter the apartment. They have pulled together a beautiful baby shower for us. One look at Graham and I know that they have surprised him too, which is something that’s hard to do.
“Are you sure it’s a good idea to take a baby to a wedding?” Graham asks. Again.
“I’m not leaving her, so it’s that or we don’t go.” I tell him. It’s been two weeks since we’ve returned from our honeymoon and one week since we were given Olivia.
“I think you would be missed since you are the best man. Can I just say I’ve never been so attracted to someone in a tux.” He is referring to the custom-made Tom Ford pencil pant tux I’m wearing. “Jackson really does know what he’s doing. Your ass in those pants.” He bites his lower lip when he looks down at my body.
“Stop. We’re going to be late as it is.” I swat at him. “You look beautiful in your tux as always.” I kiss him and then pinch Olivia’s toes. He’s holding her with her back against his chest. She, too, is in a bespoke outfit. Jackson had Armani make a dress for her with a beautiful red flower for her hair, which she has tons of already.
“She’s very smart,” Graham says smiling. He’s teasing me because I decided we should not tell her that she’s pretty all the time and argued that we shouldn’t start too early focusing on little girls’ looks. I don’t think it’s healthy, so we have substituted the word “smart” in place of “pretty.” The word “beautiful” still comes out often though. We learned her birth mother was Italian, so she has a lovely olive complexion. She’s really a striking baby.
“Sir,” Smith says looking at his watch.
“I’m ready,” I tell Smith as I head to the elevator. The wedding is in Bryant Park. There are 150 guests expected and I know without a doubt that I made the right decision only having a handful of people at ours.
I escort Jackson down the aisle first before Patrick and his sister, who is his best man, come in. Each is wearing a tux too. Jackson’s is black with a patterned pocket square. Patrick’s is black and navy blue with a flower. The sun is just setting when they both arrive at the front of the aisle. While they exchange their vows, I can’t help but to remember mine and Graham’s wedding day. I can feel his eyes on me, and I give a slight wiggle that I know only he would catch. I look over my shoulder at him, winking. He looks positively smoldering in his tux holding our daughter.
The reception is beautiful. Harry and Eloise convince me to let them take Olivia back to the apartment while Graham and I enjoy dancing and dinner. I finally agree knowing this night is about Jackson and not my daughter.
She’s asleep by the time we get home, so we sit and eat some wedding cake I brought home with me. Harry and Eloise fill us in on stories from Olivia’s bath and reading time.
“I read her the book you made about Terrance and Reggie.”
“That’s her favorite.” Graham says.
“I swear she is the prettiest little girl.” Harry places his hand over his heart and shakes his head like she is just too much for him.
“Harry,” Graham and Eloise smirk.
“Right, sorry. She is the smartest little girl,” he says, repeating the same gesture.
“Thanksgiving at Ben and Ruth’s right?” I ask, ignoring them. “And you are staying with us that weekend right?”
“I mean, we can, but it seems silly. We do have our own house in the Hampton’s,” Harry says.
“I know. But it’s our first Thanksgiving together as well as our first one with Olivia and us being married.”
“That’s a lot of firsts,” Graham mumbles.
“I’ll make my grandmother’s dressing. It’s a cornbread recipe from the south so you should like it,” Eloise says.
“Emelia…Emelia?” Graham says again with a little more force. “What’s wrong?” he asks, moving toward me. It’s only then I realize he’s been saying my name and I’ve been unresponsive.
“Addie!” I reach for Graham’s phone. It starts to ring as I pick it up.
“Kyle? I’m on my way,” I say into the phone without saying hello and before he’s had a chance to say anything.
“Something’s wrong with Addie,” I tell Harry, who’s already moving towards me.
Graham calls down to Smith who is upstairs in less than a minute. Stefanie is with him and offers to stay with Olivia.
“Thank you. My parents will be here shortly,” Graham tells her while texting on his phone.
It takes us almost thirty minutes to get to the hospital, and I’m doing my best to run in the five inch heels I wore to the wedding.
“Emelia, you’re going to break your neck.” Graham picks up his pace to catch up with me.
“Kyle.” He’s waiting for us as we come down the hall.
“She’s starting to shut down. I don’t know why. I won’t be able to stop it without drastic measures, and you and Harry have a DNR.”
“How drastic? Maybe we could try—”
I place my hand on his arm. “Harry. She’s ready.”
Tears well up in his eyes and he nods at me. Two months ago I wouldn’t have fully understood, but now, after Olivia, I do.
“Can we donate her organs if we do it now?” I ask Kyle.
“If you decide within the next hour, it’s doable. Past that and there’s no guarantee they would be viable. She’s shutting down. Fast. I’ve never seen anything like it.”
We enter her room and I take her hand. “I knew when I was here earlier today with Olivia. I could feel it. I think she’s been waiting for me to be okay. Today I told her I was. It’
s your turn,” I tell Addie, running the back of my hand down her cheek. “You can go,” I assure her. “You have to tell her, Harry. She needs to know you’ll be okay too.” I step back pulling Graham into the hall with me.
After a few minutes, Kyle follows us back in and I stand on the other side of Addie across from Harry. He nods and I look at Kyle. “Take her organs,” I tell him. Harry lays his head down and cries.
Thanksgiving
“Happy Thanksgiving,” Ben barely says to me before taking Olivia from my arms. She’s happy to see him and laughs when he makes silly faces at her.
“Happy Thanksgiving, Emme,” Ruth says kissing my cheek. She touches my forehead looking concerned.
“I’m beginning to wonder if anyone sees me anymore. All anyone sees when I walk in is Olivia,” I tease.
“I see you,” Graham whispers in my ear.
“Olivia!” Lucy shouts before extracting her from a disgruntled grandpa.
“Are you feeling okay dear?” Ruth stops and gives me all of her attention.
“Graham asked me the same thing this morning. Why? Do I look bad?”
“You look beautiful as always, but you looked like you did when you were getting the flu. You know you’re more susceptible once you’ve had it. It can take weeks for the symptoms to totally leave your body, and you’ve had a lot of stress since then.” She feels my neck. I catch Graham’s concern as he watches from across the room.
“I’m okay. Just tired.”
“Olivia hasn’t slept very well the last few nights,” Graham says. “Add to it losing Addie and the funeral. I think Emelia needs some rest.”
“I’m fine.” I kiss him before helping in the kitchen. A little while later Harry and Eloise show along with Holt and his family. I’m not sure how Lucy finagled that one, but she did. I didn’t realize that they don’t really have any family, so it’s usually just the three of them.
“Jean. Would you like to give Olivia her bottle?” I ask, trying to share the joy.
“It’s funny you think anyone else was going to,” Richard smiles. “Ouch!” he says when Jean pinches him before she takes Olivia from Jules.
“How many pies did you make Mom?” Adam asks, looking at the ones on the side cabinet.
“We have a lot of people, so there are five pies, two cakes, and a tiramisu.”
“Oh my goodness, Ruth.” I pat my hips. “I haven’t felt like running, so I can’t eat anything I want like I use to.”
“I love it,” Graham says, walking by me, patting my hips and grabbing the plates to set the table.
“You say that till we have to buy new clothes. A few more pounds and I won’t be able to fit in mine anymore. You saw that skirt yesterday.”
“So did every other male in the eating area who almost dropped their trays.”
Everyone is laughing and enjoying themselves, as I watch from the corner of the room.
“What are you thinking about?” Graham asks, pulling me into his arms.
“This. How good it feels to be a family. To celebrate Thanksgiving together. Do you think Harry is okay?” I ask him before he plants a soft kiss to my lips.
“No. But he will be. Are you okay?”
“I will be.”
“I’ll put Olivia down for her nap. She should be good and tired after all this.”
“Let me do it, son,” Ben says, walking past us to boos and random threats as he takes her from the group.
I help move the food to the table, and we all take our seats when Ben comes out with the baby monitor in tow.
“Sweetheart, we have so much to be thankful for. Will you say the blessing?” Ruth looks at Ben and reaches for the hand next to her. Like dominos, we all follow her lead. Adam holds my left hand while Graham holds my right. Ben says a lovely blessing, and we all give thanks.
As we eat, we share stories from previous Thanksgivings and talk about our favorite memories as well as our newest ones, and about how much things have changed in such a short amount of time.
After too much dessert, we all pitch in to clean the mess. “I’ll do this,” Graham says taking the sponge out of my hand. “Go rest while she’s still resting. You’ve been up with her every night.”
I leave him, Adam, and Holt to cleanup duty while I curl up with Jules on the loveseat, resting my head in her lap. Lucy, Eloise, and Harry have started what looks like a serious game of Scrabble.
“How do y’all do Christmas?” I ask Ruth.
“Usually we do it at Graham’s in the city, but we can do something different if you want it to be the three of you,” she offers.
Lucy looks up to see my response and breathes a sigh of relief when I say, “Don’t change a thing.”
“You’re going to be sore.” Graham wakes me some time later, moving the hair off my face. I’m sleeping with my knees almost under my chin while Jules is still running her fingers through my hair.
“They’re about to start a movie. Why don’t we head back to the house? We can feed Olivia before giving her a bath and putting her down. Plus you can get some proper rest. ”
“I think we’ll come with you,” Harry says.
We walked over earlier, but it’s colder and dark now so we ride with Harry and Eloise over to the house.
Graham turns on the fireplace, and we sit and enjoy watching Harry feed Olivia.
“I think she can skip a bath tonight.” I take her, letting everyone say their goodnights.
“Why don’t you let me read to her and put her down with you?” Harry stands and follows me. He makes the animal noises in the fun book, then reads soothingly to her from the second. She’s sound asleep by the time he gets to the last page.
“Emme, you sleep tonight. I’ll get up with her,” Eloise says.
“Mom, I’m fine. I can take care of her.”
“You know, I never thought I would get to be a mom, much less a grandmother. I always thought it would be something I would have to listen to my friends talk about, and now I’m living the dream too. I want to get up with my granddaughter to rock and love on her.”
“If you’re sure, Noni.” I call her by the name she has chosen. It’s what she called her grandmother as a child, and I think it suits her and plays nicely with Harry’s “Poppa.”
It’s still early, only nine, but Graham and I take the opportunity afforded to us and head to our bedroom. Even though I have been getting up with Olivia this week, Graham has had to work to make up for our time out of the office, so I know he’s tired too. He still wakes up whenever I do.
“Look at my ass.” I say over my shoulder looking at my butt in the mirror. The lace underwear cut high over each cheek.
“Unless you want to get fucked tonight, I suggest you cover that up.”
“Seriously. I love my body and I don’t mind having curves, but I think my ass has grown this week.”
“Emelia. That’s it!” he says gruffly, picking me up and laying me face down on the bed. He rips my underwear off of me and tosses it across the room. “Let me see if this is true.” He runs his hand over my ass before his lips trace the crevice where each cheek meets the back of my legs. He kisses his way from my clit to the crack of my ass where his tongue fucks me while his fingers move in and out of my sex. As always, his tongue in my most vulnerable place sets me off into a mind-blowing orgasm.
“I warned you to stop,” he says in my ear, having moved up my body. I can feel his erection, and despite the exhaustion I feel, he’s like an igniter to my sex. We haven’t had sex this week, and for us that is unheard of.
“I’m tired,” I tease, knowing there is no way I could stop now even if I wanted to.
“Baby, I’m so juiced up from your ass, all you have to do is lay there. I’ll do the rest.” His tongue loops my ear.
“That’s sexy,” I laugh, reaching behind me to grab him.
He rolls me on my back before sliding his sleep pants down. Pushing my knees to my chest he slowly runs his tongue down the length of my sex, bringing me
off the bed.
“God, I love you,” he says, sliding into me while his hands rest on my knees. I love this position; it’s deep and I can watch him move in and out of me. It turns me on, and he knows it. He pulls out to his tip then locks his eyes on me as he slowly eases his way back in me. Taking his time. When he’s almost in, he pushes on my knees rocking my hips upwards allowing him to push even deeper, and holds himself in place for a long minute.
“Fuck,” he says on an exhale when I tighten my Kegel muscles around him. I do it again and he starts to really move. I reach my hand down and tug on his balls. “Shit! Emelia!” And for the first time in our relationship he comes before I do. Watching his orgasm is enough to set me off, and my walls spasm around him, drawing his experience out.
“Holy fuck!” He collapses on top of me trying to catch his breath. I wrap my legs around him while he’s still inside of me. We lay together as our breathing slows, and without realizing it, we fall asleep literally connected to one another.
Graham is the first to stir and as he pulls out of me, it nudges me awake. “Sorry, baby,” he says massaging my legs. “We fell asleep.”
“You can sleep with me like that anytime.” I kiss him languorously before he rolls me on my side and pulls me against him.
Week before Christmas has me even more harried and tired than I was at Thanksgiving. Ruth has been on me to see her, so I have finally made an appointment with her at the clinic.
“I’m sure it’s nothing Ruth,” I tell her. “We’re adapting to having a new baby in the house.”
“Still. With your mom’s history, we can never be too careful,” she says, checking the lymph nodes in my neck before laying me back on the exam table. “I think you should have genetic testing done that way you would know one way or the other. Is that something you would want to do?”
“Yes, I would do that. It would alleviate everyone worrying every time I get worn out or sick.” I wince when she presses on my breast and she notices.
“Tender there?”
“A little.”