In the coming months, Kathy was inconsolable about the ‘baby’ she felt she had lost. She was frantic to become pregnant again with Alice’s baby. Each time she tried though, she failed. Alice was at a loss of what to do. The money it cost, and it was exorbitant with this unique situation, didn’t faze her, instead she would pay any amount of money to make Kathy happy. But this was psychological, this was chemical, and Alice could only watch as each time Kathy tried and failed to keep the baby or didn’t become pregnant at all.
“I don’t know how to get her to relax anymore, she is frantic, and she is desperate to become pregnant again,” she talked to the psychiatrist that their fertility doctor had recommended for them both. Today, Alice had gone alone, something she didn’t enjoy but she would do anything for Kathy.
“You have to get her to stop this cycle, it’s what is consuming her, and by allowing her to keep trying you aren’t giving her body a chance to recover.”
Alice looked at the psychiatrist for a moment, her strange cat-like eyes narrowing and making the woman feel strangely uncomfortable for a moment before they instantly changed back to a pretty woman’s odd yellow colored eyes. She nodded, “I know, I have to be the bad guy and tell her no more.”
The psychiatrist nodded in agreement, it was for Kathy’s own good. Having Alice’s endless supply of money had allowed her to indulge, to obsess, and to create a situation that was frying her mind and her body. She needed to stop the cycle of implantations and pregnancies that were failing due to her body and the psychiatrist suspected her mind’s fragility.
“No, no more Kathy,” Alice was in their study looking out at the ocean. She had known that this confrontation wouldn’t be easy.
“But maybe this time…” Kathy began pleadingly; it wasn’t often that Alice said no to her.
“That’s what you said the last time and the time before,” Alice turned around and fixed her with a stare that would have frightened most people but Kathy had learned to enjoy, to get excited by it, but this time it affected her as it was intended, it made her realize that Alice wasn’t going to give in. “I won’t lose you because you aren’t using the sense God gave you about it, these endless fertility treatments and implantations aren’t good for your body, you need to heal, I need to see you well, you’ve ignored Kit for months, you aren’t sleeping, you need to stop and I won’t let you do it again,” she said coldly although it was breaking her heart to do so.
“Then I’ll do it myself,” Kathy ascertained in a surprisingly strong voice.
Alice shrugged, she wasn’t worried about that, Kathy had money, they spent Alice’s and anything Kathy had earned she had saved, but one of these treatments would wipe out her savings. She didn’t want to be controlling. Her face though became colder, “With what? I refuse to allow my eggs to be used again until your body is ready.”
“It is ready,” Kathy pleaded; she knew it was, she felt it.
Alice shook her head, “No, it isn’t, you need a complete rest from this and then and only when the doctor says it is time will we do it again.”
“Alice, don’t you understand, I want this baby, I want our baby,” Kathy started to cry.
Normally Alice would have melted at the tears but losing Kathy was more important than her need to have a baby. She didn’t relish the thought of changing diapers or having the smell of a baby around but for Kathy she would have changed her life and had. But not anymore, the doctor had said if Kathy didn’t stop she might lose her life and Alice wasn’t willing to chance that. For once in her life she was happy and Kathy wasn’t going to ruin that. “I do understand but you are being unreasonable about this situation, allow your body to rest, to recover fully, you would have more of a chance for this to work.”
“You don’t understand, I want this now, I want your baby,” Kathy sounded a bit unbalanced and Alice’s eyes narrowed as she recognized the signs.
“I love you Kathy and I won’t let you do this to yourself anymore, you need to recover,” she insisted.
“You don’t love me or you’d let me have one more try,” Kathy sniffled.
Alice paused in the reply she wanted to make knowing it would cause more harm than good. Instead she tried to take Kathy in her arms but with a cry she ran from the room and upstairs, slamming their bedroom door. Alice sighed; this wasn’t going to be easy.
As they celebrated the birth of their first son a year later Alice looked down on the wrinkled little boy that had become a healthy pink and considered how much had happened in the last year. Kathy hadn’t talked to her for weeks, then her body’s natural vitality had insisted on release and she had turned to Alice for lovemaking which Alice had gladly supplied, her body had healed rapidly, her mind had healed slowly, and they returned to the loving, teasing, and wonderful couple they had been before this whole relentless cycle of treatments had begun. When the doctor had proclaimed Kathy healthy enough to try again they had hesitated and discussed it thoroughly before once again allowing the doctor to complete the procedure. Kathy had spent all the first three months of the pregnancy sitting on lounge chairs around the pool, working on her tan, and working evenings on her work. This relaxed schedule had ensured that she made it through the first trimester. After that they could relax a little more and take walks, the three of them enjoying going out to dinner again, spending time that before had been a little forced.
Kit had been relieved, her mom’s behavior had puzzled and alarmed her, if not for Alice she would have been totally ignored. She loved them both; she understood more now at nearly ten than she had at eight how much and how the two women could love each other. Alice was wonderful and she referred to her as ‘Mama Al’ which annoyed and secretly delighted Alice.
Now faced with the fact that she would have a new little brother or sister she was excited and alarmed, not sure if the attention her two mom’s lavished on her would change again. Alice took extra time out of her schedule to spend time with her, taking her out on her boat, alone without Kathy to fish and talk to her. Kit and Kathy both had been surprised that Alice knew how to fish. She even put the worm on the hook for Kit who was a bit squeamish about it. Kathy took her shopping and together they decorated the nursery. Alice enjoyed seeing the warm maternalistic glow that Kathy took on.
Seeing the little boy in Kathy’s arm, the culmination of a lot of treatments and a lot of fights that had nearly destroyed their marriage made it all worthwhile, any anger that Alice had felt about the near psychological breakdown that Kathy had had over all this was gone in an instant, any anger that Kathy had felt towards Alice and her controlling ways was forgotten in the bright blue eyes of their son.
“What should we name him?” Kathy asked as she sat up in her bed and held the little bundle.
Alice was relieved he was cleaned up now, she had refused to hold him immediately after his birth, he had been covered in gunk and Kathy had laughed weakly as they put him on her stomach. She had known Alice was thrilled at her pregnancy but not as enthused at being her birth coach.
“How about Sean,” Alice said tenderly as she looked down at the little boy. She had never seen it that a squashed up newborn would look like its parents but strangely the little boy did look a lot like Kathy and even had her darker hair. She thought she could see a hint of herself in those little cheeks but put that down as pride in her offspring that was as much hers as it was Kathy’s.
“That’s perfect,” Kathy whispered as she looked up and smiled at Alice.
So Sean Michael Weaver it became and the two women were proud to call him son. By the time he was two he had a sister by the name of Emily Renee Weaver. They were very happy in their little family.
“Can you believe these two,” Kathy came up behind Alice and put her arms around her wife who stood gazing in the nursery as Sean proudly attempted to teach his infant sister to grab a block.
Alice looked over her shoulder at her wife and took the opportunity to kiss her, “I think they are perfect, but then I think I may be a l
ittle biased.”
Kathy squeezed to let her know how much she appreciated what she had said. She thought they were perfect too. Kit adored her much younger siblings and had found that her parents attention hadn’t waned, in fact as she became a teenager they seemed to pay a lot closer attention to her than her friends parent’s which secretly delighted her and publically annoyed her. They didn’t ask her to babysit her brother and sister since they had hired a live in nanny by the name of ‘Nan’ who swore it was short for Nantucket, her parents had come over from Ireland and worked for a couple who lived on Nantucket and named their daughter after the island. Nan had fit in the family household and enjoyed living in Southern California. It had taken a little while to get used to a two mom family but the money that Alice paid her made her overlook a lot of irregularities.
“We should take a vacation,” Alice whispered as she watched their two prodigies play ever so carefully, Nan sat in a rocking chair watching the two babies’ play.
“That is a terrific idea,” Kathy whispered enthusiastically as she pulled Alice from the doorway and into the hall to push her up against the wall and kiss her enthusiastically.
It had been eight weeks since Kathy had given birth to Emily; both pregnancies had been fraught with danger to her body, from rejecting the fetuses, to swollen ankles and the usual complications of pregnancy, to Kathy’s overly healthy need for wild sex. This last pregnancy she had become so demanding that Alice, who enjoyed a healthy sex life with her wife, had feared that they would do injury to the baby. She had discussed it with Kathy’s doctor and despite her embarrassment over the subject had found it interesting that a lot of pregnant women became insatiable at this point. Now that the time had passed since she had given birth Kathy looked forward to returning to the wild and passionate sex she had enjoyed with Alice. Alice had refused time and time again and didn’t complain now as Kathy kissed her, she returned those kisses just as passionately.
They took their desire downstairs to the master bedroom where their cries of ecstasy and passion could and would be muffled by the specially designed walls of the bedroom. Alice had discovered this and been pleased when she inspected the architectural design of the house. They heard the babies and Kit and other sounds of the house through the monitors but no one heard them unless the windows were open and these too had a special design to muffle sounds.
It was a good thing too as both of them enjoyed each other and their bodies. Alice had loved seeing the changes in Kathy’s pregnant body over the months of her pregnancies; her obsessive-compulsive disorder had faded over the joy of having first Sean and now Emily. She knew that Alice loved her and her insatiable need for sex soothed her worries that Alice would fall out of love because of her bloated body. Alice had never even considered straying; she preferred being home with her wife and family, something she had never considered before in her life. She was content, she was happy, an unheard of thing in her world. That one person could bring so much into her life was something she had not realized was missing.
People who had met them through the grade school that Kit attended had been at first surprised at a two mom family but it was more acceptable than it had been at an earlier time and date. Kathy was a fully participating mom and Alice attended every recital, every play, and every sporting event, even if she had to be on her phone or laptop as she cheered on Kit. Parents knew that Alice was a little cold in comparison to Kathy, but Kathy more than made up for any deficiencies they saw in Alice. Alice had been more than generous at their fundraisers and other school functions so this quieted those that would have said things about her. They ran into the same thing at the middle school when Kit started there, especially with Kathy being pregnant but again a period of time had allowed them to fit into their social functions and let people get used to them.
There would always be people who didn’t accept gay couples, the neighbors down the street were two men raising three little girls and they were constantly harassed but they had become friends out of necessity with Alice and Kathy, their daughters while much younger than Kit adored her and looked up to her.
Kit had been teased a few times about her two ‘moms’ but had ignored as much as she could. She knew that her real mom Kathy had been incredibly happy with Alice and that her adopted mom Alice made their lives wonderful. Their beautiful home, their incredible vacations, and their life was just so much better as a team. Even the babies added a certain semblance of normalcy and Kit realized it was all due to Alice in their lives. She had gotten into a couple of fights both verbal and physical and Kathy had been concerned. Alice instead taught her to ignore as much as she could and if they threw the first punch how to fight back, not like a girl, but rather with the intent of finishing the fight then and there. Alice went to a dojo twice a week and began taking Kit who learned to defend herself and watched as Alice, their best student, practiced the art of Karate. She didn’t go to learn anymore but rather to keep in shape and to get out of the house. As much as she loved Kathy, she wouldn’t, she couldn’t stay in the house 24/7. Kathy learned to enjoy her few nights at home alone without Alice and without Kit. She herself had the school meetings and clubs to attend to. A couple of times a week Alice had business meetings but Kathy never suspected they were more than she said they were.
They had become an ‘all American’ family and both Portia and Andie were happy for their friend whenever they visited. The pregnancies had been hard on their friend but Alice had been terrific to and for her, they had never seen Kathy so happy and content. Her little rants and raves as her hormones surged had been the least of anyone’s worries.
It wasn’t until their sixth year together that doubts began to arise in Kathy’s mind about Alice. It was the ‘meetings’ she attended that began to make her suspicious. Her good friend Bonnie had wondered where Alice went periodically, sometimes leaving for most of the day but coming home showered and apparently normal. Since their girls played together Bonnie had become a fixture in Kathy’s household and Alice had accepted it and even welcomed the friendship. Had she known that Bonnie had expressed her doubts about where Alice went when she left the house she might have not been so welcoming. She however accepted Bonnie as Kathy’s good friend and didn’t think twice about her, instead going on about her life and habits that weren’t really habits so much as disciplines.
Fed with Bonnie’s suspicions though Kathy began to doubt Alice and her practices, although she did a lot of work from home these ‘meetings’ began to seem odd, they weren’t every week or the same day or days of the week so she hadn’t been suspicious before but they happened often enough that she wondered exactly what Alice did. She didn’t dress up beyond her normal fastidiousness but more often than not came back from the meeting freshly showered and this alone made Kathy wonder where she went. Alice had also kept the condo in the marina with the pier for her boat. They still went out on it often enough, Alice occasionally with Kit alone or even going out in it alone. She claimed the fresh breezes of the ocean cleared her head. Kathy began to wonder though why she needed to ‘clear her head’ and as her suspicions began to mount from other incidences pointed out by Bonnie she began to doubt Alice and became uneasy about the situation.
What she didn’t think about rationally was that Alice hadn’t changed. Her behavior was the same as it always had been. She just did what she needed to do and informed Kathy of when she was going out, whether to the dojo or on a business meeting or to the condo or boat, she kept her well informed but she didn’t tell her what she did at the business meetings and any questions about it usually got a vague answer that never completely satisfied Kathy’s mounting curiosity and uneasiness. What about these ‘meetings’ did she need a shower? She followed Alice one night on one of these ‘meetings’ and found her heading into the valley to a non-descript house which she apparently knew well as she let herself in with a key. Kathy found she stayed there several hours and left freshly showered. Kathy’s obvious conclusion was that Alice had a lover st
ashed there. It made everything they had tainted and her unease began to mount higher.
Alice, always astute to Kathy realized there was something, just a vague uneasiness between them but nothing she could quite put her finger on. It sent off signals in her highly tuned brain and she looked for what was causing a problem between them not realizing how highly strung Kathy was becoming or how highly upset deep down. Instead she had dismissed some of it as post-partum depression, something the doctor had warned about and they had experienced both times with the children, she had thought Kathy was almost past it but the doctor told her it could last years. Seeing her down about apparently nothing it was a natural conclusion that Kathy was just hormonal and she intended to mention it at the next checkup.
After six months of this behavior and seeing it increase in some ways Alice was determined to have it out and clear the air of what was bothering Kathy. She was relieved when Kathy assured her it was ‘nothing’ and that she had just been busy with the children. She knew Kathy was lying though when she said some of it was Alice’s imagination.
Seeing a romantic letter typed out and waiting for her one day when she returned from one of her ‘meetings’ she hastily packed a picnic basket and a bottle of wine and headed down to the marina intending to have a romantic dinner with her wife on the boat as the letter suggested. Kathy’s note had indicated the children were taken care of by Nan and that they would have a nice evening together…
Alice let herself into the condo, Kathy had her own set of keys but she was surprised that the alarm was chirping oddly. As she turned on the lights to walk through the condo she stopped and stared in horror at the scene before her on the floor of the living room.
“NO NO NO NO NOOOOOOOO,” she cried animal like as she dropped the basket and headed to the prone body on the floor. Gently she felt for a pulse in Kathy’s throat that had apparently been slashed. Used to seeing death she wasn’t used to seeing it in someone she loved and the shock of it froze her normally active mind from making any move, from reacting, she checked and re-checked getting blood over herself as she frantically searched for a pulse of her wife’s prone body…
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