Storm wiped off her hands, then handed Li a heart-shaped cake pan. "Now speak to me, Li. Tell me what ails you."
Li dutifully stuck her hands into the tin of shortening. Somehow it seemed she was always called upon to grease the cake pans though it was her least-favorite job in the kitchen.
"Nothing ails me, stepmother." She shrugged, suddenly uncomfortable talking about the troublesome thoughts that had been racing around her mind for almost a season. She'd never been close to her stepmother. Storm was a distant woman who'd always put her children first, even at the sake of her stepdaughter. Even though their relationship was cordial for the most part, Li knew there was no way she could make Storm understand what was really going on inside of her.
"I don't know how to put it into words," Li said.
"Just try."
"Tomorrow I turn twenty-two and I'm well past the age of joining by at least four seasons," Li spoke in a rush. "In all that time not a single he-elf has even looked in my direction. I know it's because I'm half-human. My wings are too small, and when I've gone out to the market, I've heard others make comments about them behind my back."
Li twisted around so that Storm could see the small, gauzy wings centered between her shoulders. They were barely the size of those found on a toddler. In another season Jaxs's would be bigger than hers.
It was humiliating.
"You're young--" Storm began.
Li shook her head and continued greasing the pan. "I'm of age. Mara of Green Oak was married last full moon, and she was born a full season after I. Gola from River's Edge is now betrothed, as is her younger sister Fanwy, and they're both much younger than I."
Tears clouded her vision and her voice grew husky. It wasn't fair. She had as much love to give as those other women but her cursed mixed blood would prevent her from ever finding a mate among her own people. The inhabitants of Lygas were set in their ways, and to them, humans and elves should never mingle, let alone have children.
Storm removed the cake pan from Li's shaking hands, then handed her a towel. "I do understand your plight, Li. There are many here in Lygas who will only look at a full-elf as a potential wife, but we haven't yet begun to exhaust the possibilities for your future. Your father and I have discussed it and we think Carousel might be the best option for you."
"No." Li shuddered. "That's not even a possibility."
Carousel was for old maids and other unwanted women. Many times, the participants of Carousel were passed from household to household until someone kept them on by marrying them or they were hired as household help. It was a degrading practice and Li wanted no part of it.
"Many happy, contented women have received their marriages through Carousel--"
"I'd rather be dead." Li's voice was flat.
"Don't say that, child," Storm said. "There are far worse fates for a woman than to be a second wife."
"Yeah, she can be half-elfkind and half-mortal--that is a fate worse than death in the eyes of the village." Li slapped the towel down. "As long as I stay here no elf will marry me." Her gaze clashed with Storm's. "It's better that I leave Lygas to live in the mortal world. At least there I can have a chance at experiencing happiness even if it is only for a few years."
Her stepmother averted her gaze to busy herself with the cake batter. "No, I cannot allow it, and your father won't--"
"Storm." Li placed her hand on her stepmother's arm. "You are the only mother I've ever known. Not many elves would have taken a halfling into their home the way you did. I've never asked you for anything, but I'm going to today. Please, just listen to me with your heart." Li dropped her hand. "I believe my only chance of true happiness is living in the mortal world with a human husband. No elf in the village will consider me for marriage, and I will consider nothing less."
Her stepmother almost dropped the mixing bowl and Li was forced to take it away from her. Setting it on the table, she took her stepmother's cold hands into her own.
"It breaks my heart to think that I'll have to leave my family, but I cannot stay here and become a burden--a topic of pity among your friends." Li rubbed the back of Storm's hands with her thumbs. "I need to follow my own path, and this is right, I feel it in my heart."
Storm raised her blue eyes, so much like her three daughters' that Li's heart almost broke.
"I haven't always treated you well, I know that, and I'm ashamed of my past behavior. I was so jealous of your mother. Even though your father faced banishment for taking her as a wife, he loved her enough to take that chance. To this day, I am jealous of the depth of his love for her." Storm gave a watery laugh. "She was so beautiful and I was deeply in love with your father, even when he was married to Selen.
"When I was joined with him, I tried to love you, but you looked so much like your mother that it was hard to be reminded every day that Selen was his first love." She gave a noisy sniff. "All of that is in the past now. We will speak to your father when he returns home. What do you think he will say?"
Li squeezed Storm's hands even as her stomach twisted. Her father loved her--she knew without a doubt in her mind. Since the death of her mother, he'd become a hard man who saw only black and white in any situation.
She straightened her shoulders and released her stepmother. Surely he would accept her decision without a fight when he realized it was her future happiness that was at stake?
"He will understand." She spoke with more confidence then she felt. "He has to."
* * *
Li was more miserable than she'd ever thought possible. Her back hurt so badly she couldn't stand straight, and she was forced to stumble through the dark woods bent at the waist.
Pausing beneath the sanctuary of a massive tree, she grit her teeth against the pain when she straightened her spine. The woods were shrouded in a heavy blanket of rain, throwing her surroundings into shadow. Rain ran into her eyes and she blinked away the bothersome drops.
She was deep in the woods of Lothlorn, several miles south of her home. In her entire life, she'd never been this far from her family.
She was well and truly alone.
Weary, she leaned against the tree, grateful for the sturdy support. Rain had been falling for the past few hours, leaving her chilled and soaked to the skin. With a shaky hand, Li pushed her wet hair out of her eyes.
How could she have been so wrong about her father?
Her head dropped forward and she allowed her eyes to close. As long as she lived she'd never forget the nightmare of the past few hours. After he'd returned from the forge, Li and Storm had given him a few hours to relax before attempting to speak with him about Li's situation.
At first her father had thought they were joking and he'd enjoyed a hearty laugh. It was only after Li continued to speak that he realized she was serious about leaving her family to live with the humans. It was then his laughter turned to anger.
At first he'd raged, waving his meaty fists in her face in an attempt to intimidate her. While Li had never seen him so angry, she knew in her heart of hearts that her father would never strike her though there'd been times when she'd been genuinely uneasy in the face of his terrible rage.
Hours of arguing and threats of locking her away had followed, but Li remained steadfast in her decision. Finally, he'd dragged his protesting daughter, with the rest of the family in tow, to the town square. Once there he'd rung the meeting bell, alerting the townspeople to an emergency. After hundreds of Lygasians had gathered, her father had told them of her plans and requested she be banished from the village and their clan.
If that weren't bad enough, her father had held her down as Binli, the holy man, had torn away her wings. The pain had been more excruciating than she'd ever dreamed. Lying on the ground, staring at the delicate gauzy wings in the mud, she'd felt as if a piece of her soul had been destroyed. Until that moment, she hadn't realized how much of her being, her identity, had resided in those fragile silvery appendages.
When the deed was done, her father had relea
sed her and turned away, presenting her with his back. Slowly, the villagers had followed suit.
On the edge of the crowd she'd glimpsed Storm with her arms around her sobbing daughters. Ro held Jaxs, and when the toddler had seen Li raise her head, he'd held his arms out toward her as he'd cried out her name over and over again. Her heart was well and truly broken.
Li was now dead to her family and her village.
She'd been dealt the ultimate blow when her family betrayed her. She stifled a sob and forced her eyes open before stepping away from the tree. Never again would she let someone close to her heart. Never again would she let someone have the power to hurt her.
Blinded by tears, she began to walk south. Even without support from her family she would make her place in the world. She'd go her own way and find people who would accept her for who she was rather than despise her for her mixed parentage.
* * *
CHAPTER ONE
The Evil Ones were waiting for her.
Li hurried down the hall, the damp hem of her gray woolen cloak slapping her ankles. She'd just returned from the Harvest Festival in the village. Unfortunately, a little too much ale had caused her to lose track of time and now she was late, very late, in getting her work done. If she hurried she could get this distasteful job completed and be tucked into her cosy bed within an hour, maybe a little less if she took a few shortcuts.
She wasn't sure what she'd done to get stuck with this particular chore. Old Sari--the woman who'd held the job for many, many years--had left the household only a few months before, leaving the care of the stony beasts to Li.
She shook her head. It was probably because she didn't complain too loudly. If she were more of a whiner like Gerta or Hen, the kitchen maids, she too could have a job like theirs, surrounded by good food and warm fires.
Not that she needed more food, as her butt was big enough--or so Junal had just informed her a few hours ago. She rolled her eyes. What a fool. Granted, at the time he'd been angry she'd rejected his sexual advances for the third time. As Junal was the leader of the peacekeepers--the men who enforced the laws of the realm--she'd always been a little intimidated by him. For the past season he'd made no attempt to hide his interest in her, though she'd taken great pains to ensure she'd done nothing to encourage his behavior.
There was something very unsettling about Junal and she'd never felt comfortable around him. Maybe it was the fact he looked at her as if he were a starving man and she were a plate of cheese. Or it could be the fact he had one silver tooth in the front of his mouth. She shuddered. The man had a nice home and a secure future as a peacekeeper, but he didn't arouse any emotion in her other than mild distaste.
Li shoved the hood off her head. She was looking for a man who set her heart on fire and made her pulse pound when he looked at her. Wasn't that what romance was about? Loyalty? Passion? Devotion? According to the cheap novels she devoured every week, a woman's knees should go weak when the right man kissed her--and she was determined to settle for no less.
It wasn't as if she needed a man to survive. Her position within the house of Graystone more than provided her with a place to live, food to eat, and enough coin to buy whatever else she might need. In the past few years she'd even managed to collect a tidy little pile of coins for herself.
The fact that she could take care of herself was a matter of great pride. She'd survived her banishment--nay, thrived in spite of it--and she was determined to not settle for the first man who would have her. While she couldn't promise to give a lover her heart, she wanted the rest of the package: the devotion, commitment, stability, and affection that an equitable relationship would bring. That much she could guarantee.
Cookie thought she was being too particular, that with her standards, no mere man would ever measure up. But Li was determined to have no less than her heart's desire. If that meant being alone for the rest of her life, then that was the way it would be.
She hurried past a row of windows just as lightning flashed in the distance. Unease snaked down her spine when the memory of clammy wet clothing and persistent rain assailed her. Thanks to her banishment and the consequent nightmarish trip through the elements she hated storms with a passion. Rather than being lulled to sleep by the soft patter of rain on the roof, she was suffocated with the memories of cold water against her skin.
When she'd first arrived on the doorstep of Graystone within several mooncycles of leaving her family, working in a house as grand as this was a dream come true for an ignorant such as she. Li couldn't read nor write the language of the humans though she'd caught on quickly enough. Her speech had been improved by her time in the household though she'd struggled to lose her slight accent to no avail. Even now, several seasons later she'd catch someone rolling his or her eyes when she misspoke.
She didn't care, not anymore. Most of the members of the household were friendly with her though some regarded her with suspicion after she'd accepted her position with the Evil Ones. As far as she was concerned, she'd made friends, secured a place to live and forged a life from the ashes of the old one. The mistress of Graystone was very pleased with her work, and Li had learned early on to fade into the background. She said very little and accomplished her assigned tasks with a minimum of fuss. Though if there were one duty to fuss about, this would be the one.
She hurried through a tall archway, her gaze fixed on the double doors leading into the solarium. It was where they were kept. Her palms grew moist and with each step her unease grew. It didn't matter how many times she had to walk through those doors and deal with the Evil Ones, she dreaded it each and every time.
She reached into her pocket to pull out a large brass key. The metal was cold in her hand and her grip tightened until the ornate handle bit into her palm. Taking a deep breath, she inserted the key into the lock. The well-oiled mechanism turned with barely a sound and she pushed the door open.
A rush of icy air escaped. She shuddered as the cold draft caressed her face. It felt as if something inside were reaching out to her.
The room was as dark as night and as cold as a grave. Only the faintest embers glowed in the fireplace. She swallowed hard and tried to ignore her pounding heart when she walked into the freezing room. Pocketing the key, she reached for a large brass knob on the wall near the fireplace. A soft golden glow leapt to life when she turned it. The oil lamps fixed to the walls pushed back the darkness and Li released a sigh of relief when the room was bright with artificial light. She opened the fireplace screen then reached for the poker.
One of the most important aspects of her job was to keep the fire burning when it grew dark or if the weather was cool or damp. Since she'd been in the village for most of the afternoon, the fire had been allowed to burn down leaving the Evil Ones in the darkness. In her opinion that was exactly where they belonged.
She stirred the embers until they glowed then added some fresh kindling. As she worked to rebuild the fire, rain began to fall on the stained glass ceiling overhead.
The sound was disconcerting and it only added to her unease of being alone in the solarium during a storm. A chill ran down her spine when thunder rolled overhead.
She reached for a small log. All she needed to do was get the fire going then finish some quick dusting before she could make her escape. She added the logs and when Li was satisfied that the fire would soon warm the room, she rose and shut the fire screen.
The inhabitants of the house never visited the solarium and the servants were instructed to keep the door locked at all times. Li was the only person who came into the room with any regularity. During warm weather she'd be permitted to open the multiple sets of doors leading to the terrace to admit the fresh air. The ceiling and one exterior wall was glass and it enabled the sunlight to flood the room, though the Evil Ones paid no attention to the glorious rays.
She turned toward them. The interior walls were lined from floor to ceiling with shelves, each laden with dozens of carved stone gargoyles. Every creature
was unique, and she should know as she'd dusted each of them dozens of times.
Some crouched on the edges of the shelves as if they were preparing to leap onto the shelf below. Others stood straight and tall while quite a few were reclining along the gleaming mahogany shelves, their faces frozen in dark, unpleasant leers.
Here were the Evil Ones--the silent sentinels watching the passage of time.
* * *
CHAPTER TWO
Li knew old Sari had spent most of her day in the solarium reading to the beasts or playing the harp for them. She shook her head. There was no way she was going to do that for these creatures. She wanted nothing more to do with them than what she absolutely had to do. Every time she entered the room, she could swear she felt their beady eyes following her as she completed her chores. She did her work and left as soon as possible, not returning until she knew the fire would need attention.
The Evil Ones scared her.
There was one--one gargoyle that set her nerves on edge more than all the others combined. Her gaze moved toward the figures perched on the mantel. Thunder rumbled in the distance.
Roughly twelve inches high, his hideous face was contorted into a snarl and his hands were twisted into claws. He was dressed in a curious fashion that reminded her of the Elven dress she'd seen on the older men of her village. His cape was unadorned and his clothing was trimmed in some sort of embroidered symbols she couldn't decipher due to the roughness of the stone. At his side he carried a sword and had several knives tucked into his belt. Strapped to his broad back was a quiver of arrows, and his bow was slung over his shoulder.
If she weren't mistaken, the weaponry was Elven in origin as the style of the bow was unmistakable. She scowled at the creature.
But an Elven gargoyle? Impossible.
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