by Robin Huber
Gabe pushes himself off me and gets to his feet.
I sit up and look down at my wet shirt that’s now clinging to me, and I’m reminded that I’m not wearing a bra. I casually cover my chest with my arm and stand up. “I, uh...I might need to borrow a dry shirt.”
“Yeah. A shirt. Um.” He clears his throat and shakes his head. “Yes, you can borrow a shirt.”
“Thanks.”
We head inside and he gives me a shirt to change into.
“I should probably get going. My mom wanted to make dinner for me and my dad tonight, so...” I smile softly.
“I’ll take you home.”
I grab my bag and follow him to his truck.
Things got entirely too carried away with the hose. I would have kissed him. If Gabe had kissed me, I would have kissed him back without hesitation. I would have poured every ounce of my body, heart, and soul back into him. And I think it would have meant something completely different to him.
I can’t let that happen again. I can’t risk losing him. Today was one of the best days I’ve had in years, aside from the jellyfish sting. But even that was tolerable because Gabe was there with me. He and Brandon were the two halves that made me whole, and I was reminded of that today. Gabe makes me feel like me. The me I’ve been trying to find since I left for Raleigh. I’d rather have him in my life as a friend than not have him in my life at all.
“Gabe?” My voice breaks the silence that has accompanied us on the ride back to my parents’ house.
He looks over at me and I can tell I’ve pulled him out of a deep thought. His face is smooth and unreadable, a disappointing divergence from the playfulness I finally saw in him today, after all this time. I’m not sure which is more unsettling. That his mood shifted so quickly, or that I expected anything different.
“I start work at the diner tomorrow and I know you have to work too, so I guess we won’t see each other for a little while.” I don’t know what my point is. I just can’t take the silence anymore.
He nods his head. “Yeah, I guess so.”
I feel sharply disappointed.
“Maybe you could come by the diner,” I say, smiling over the anxious feeling brewing in my stomach.
He pulls his eyebrows together, creating the little crease above the bridge of his nose that appears whenever he’s upset about something. “Maybe.”
I inhale a quiet breath and blow it out slowly. “I had fun today.”
The corners of his mouth turn up only slightly. “Yeah. Me too.”
I return a weak smile and look out of my window.
We ride in silence until we get to my parents’ house, where I give him a quick hug, collect my bag off the seat, and head inside.
Chapter 12
Liv
I finish my first shift at Lou’s with an old saying in mind. I wanted a career and I got a job. But it’s a job that pays. I made great tips today and it was actually kind of fun. It helped that Audrey was working the same shift. She showed me around and introduced me to everyone. The other employees were very welcoming.
I kept my eyes peeled for Gabe, hoping he might show up for lunch. I would be lying if I said I wasn’t disappointed when he didn’t. I would also be lying if I didn’t admit that I checked my phone every hour on the hour, hoping to see a missed call or text from him.
No calls.
No texts.
I’m trying not to take it personally, but I’m jonesin’ for a Gabe fix. I realize how screwed up that is, but he’s in my chemistry, in my DNA. I need him. I need his friendship. I need to feel that bond that was cemented into my soul so long ago. There’s a Gabe-shaped hole in my heart that only he can fill. It’s the same one that burned inside my chest the entire time I was in Raleigh. The one that I patched up with duct tape and ignored when I was with Travis, that ripped wide open the second he proposed.
“Liv,” Audrey calls across the parking lot as I make my way to my car. She jogs over to me. “Hey, wait up,” she says when she reaches me, and we walk across the gravel lot together. “So, what did you think about your first day? Ready to throw in the apron?” She smirks.
“No, it was...fun, actually.” I shake my head, still surprised that I enjoyed it as much as I did.
“Okay, I was going to ask you to hang out, but your idea of fun and mine might be a tad different,” she says, pinching her fingers together, making me laugh.
“I guess it was just nice to have something to occupy my mind for a few hours. Something other than—”
“Gabe?”
I exhale a surprised breath that comes out as an awkward laugh. “I was going to say my current situation, but I guess if you want to narrow it down to just one thing...” I say hesitantly.
“What is your current situation?” she asks, just as boldly as before. But when I don’t immediately answer, she squeezes her eyes shut and says, “Sorry. I’m so sorry. I don’t know what’s wrong with me. It’s none of my business.” She puts her hands on her hips and squints at me through the afternoon sun. “I just really hope you stay. It’s nice to have a friend here again.”
I laugh and admit, “I really hope I do too. I want to. Things are just complicated right now, that’s all.”
“Want to talk about it?”
I smile softly and sigh. “I don’t even know where to start, Audrey. It’s been complicated for a while.” I give her a telling look and she nods with understanding.
“Want to start with Brandon?” she asks carefully.
I fight the tight feeling in my chest and shake my head. “Not yet.”
She bobs her head. “Okay. Well, why did you leave Raleigh? You didn’t like it?”
“That is a much longer story than this walk.”
“All right, well we’ll save that one for drinks.”
“I’d really like that.”
“Okay”—she spins around and leans against the back of her car—“that just leaves Gabe.”
I laugh softly, trying to think of what to say, but as I do my smile wanes. “He takes beer to the cemetery and drinks it with Brandon. Did you know that?”
Compassion washes over her face. “No.”
“Yeah.” I chew my bottom lip. “And he thinks everyone blames him for what happened.”
“Do you?” she asks with genuine curiosity.
“No. Never.”
“Sorry. I just never really knew what happened between you two. There was talk, but I kept to myself after the accident.”
I shrug and smile over the hurt it still brings me. “I don’t really know. One day you love someone...one day you don’t.”
“Him or you?”
I press my lips together and admit, “Him.”
“I’m sorry, Liv.”
“Well, we’re friends now, so it worked out...I guess.”
“Do you still love him?”
“Oh, I, um...” I smile apprehensively. “It’s complicated.”
“Right.” She gives me a small, sympathetic smile.
Talking to Audrey is surprisingly comfortable. Maybe because she knew me and Gabe before the accident. Maybe because she knew Brandon. Maybe because she was a part of that fateful night. We share a piece of each other’s history.
“Well, you can see how that might cause a slight predicament for me.”
“You know, I’ve seen Gabe in the diner. He doesn’t talk much, he doesn’t smile, he doesn’t laugh like he used to. I’ve heard what people say, that it’s a side effect from his head injury. You know how people talk.” She shakes her head reproachfully.
“Yeah. I know.”
“I’m a little embarrassed to say it, but I actually avoided talking to him, because I was never sure what to say, or how he would react. But then he came in with you and he was different. I watched him with you. He talked and smiled and laughed with you. I don’t care what anyone says, he was the Gabe I remember. The boy with the gorgeous smile and a twinkle in his eye for Olivia Dalton. His eyes were glued to you the whole time.”
I
can’t help the way my heart is swimming inside my chest, but I know better than to get my hopes up. Gabe and I share a deep history. We grew up together. We lost a brother together. We’ll always be bound by that. And he will always love me in some way, I’m sure. The same way he loved Brandon.
But I do find deep satisfaction in knowing that I’m helping bring Gabe out of the state he’s been in for so long—the one I tried like hell to get him out of after the accident. The one everyone chalks up to his injury. Even if we’re never anything more than friends, I’ll be so damn happy to finally see that through.
“I think I just need a little time to navigate this new chapter of my life. My head has been kind of a mess since I left Raleigh.”
“Speaking of Raleigh,” she says curiously, “how about we go grab that drink now and you can tell me about it? I know a little inn not too far from here that does a great cocktail hour right about now.” She glances at her wrist, though she’s not wearing a watch, and gives me a slanted grin.
I smile over a quiet laugh. “Oh, okay, why not?”
“Que sera,” she says, throwing her hand into the air, “follow me.”
Audrey gets in her car and I follow her to her parents’ inn, which is hidden at the end of a long driveway that winds beneath a canopy of moss-covered live oaks. When I pull into the circular drive behind her, I’m captivated by the beauty of the white colonial-style home that sprawls across the property and stands three stories high against a backdrop of golden marshes. “Wow,” I whisper as I unbuckle.
I’ve always known about the White Magnolia Inn. Everyone on the Island does. It’s a historic landmark that’s been in Audrey’s family for generations. But I haven’t seen it since I was little, and I don’t remember it being so grand.
“Audrey,” I say, getting out of my car, “I forgot how beautiful this place is.”
“Thanks. We’ve done a lot of work on it. There’s still some to do, but we’re getting there.”
I follow her up the sprawling staircase to the second-story porch that spans the length of the house. It’s adorned with black rocking chairs, cushioned hanging swings, and slow-spinning fans that give off a subtle breeze. Large potted palms flank the large windows to the left and right of the screened double doors, and two robust ferns sit atop antique-looking pedestals on either side of them.
Audrey pulls one of the doors open and I follow her inside.
“Hi, Ms. Landry,” she says to an older woman who’s carrying a slice of what looks like key lime pie on a delicate china plate. She’s wearing a perfectly pressed, mint green dress that falls to her knees, a French manicure, and a short salt-and-pepper hairdo that’s undoubtedly held in place by a can of Aqua Net.
“Hey, darlin’,” the woman says warmly, “I was just taking this to your momma. It’s her second slice, but don’t tell her I told you.” She laughs and so does Audrey.
“Your secret’s safe with me. And really, can you blame her? You make the best key lime pie on the Island.”
“Well, be sure to get a slice then, before it’s all gone.”
“I will.”
Ms. Landry grins and looks at me. “Are you girls going to join us for bridge this afternoon?”
“Ms. Landry, you remember Liv Dalton, don’t you?”
Ms. Landry inhales a shallow breath and says softly, “Olivia Dalton. Oh, yes. You’re Maggie and Duke’s daughter, aren’t you?”
“Yes, ma’am,” the well-trained southern child inside me answers, “I am.”
She smiles, but I see the pity in her eyes when she looks at me, as if Brandon only just died. “I haven’t seen you in years, not since...well, it’s been a long time.”
“Yes,” I say, remembering her vaguely from Brandon’s funeral now. Of course, the whole town was there, filling the pews of our small, historic Episcopal church.
“It was such a beautiful service.”
“Yes, ma’am”—I smile politely over the unexpected feelings she stirs up inside me—“it was.”
“Well...you are just as pretty as a picture.” She smiles again and it crinkles her brown eyes this time. “Just like Maggie. Oh, how she used to drive the boys wild, including my son.” She laughs softly. “Jackson lives in Spartanburg now with his wife, and his kids are all grown up, but boy did he have a soft spot for your momma when he was a young man.”
“Really?” I say curiously, having never heard of Jackson Landry before.
“It wasn’t long after she married your father that Jackson joined the Navy. He wanted to see the world, or so he said.” She winks and it spikes my curiosity, but my questions will have to wait. “Come in and say hello to everyone,” she says, waving us toward the glass doors to our left.
“Maybe for just a minute,” Audrey says, giving me an apologetic look.
I follow her and Ms. Landry into a room full of women who are chattering around white-linen-covered tables that are adorned with china plates and coffee cups, delicate-looking desserts, and small bouquets of fresh flowers.
The women lower their cards and look up at us.
“Look who came to say hello,” Ms. Landry says, placing the piece of pie in front of Audrey’s mother.
She glances up at Audrey as her fork glides into the pie. “You want to play, Audrey?”
“No, I just wanted to come say hi. You remember Liv, don’t you, Momma?”
She looks at me and I see the same fleeting sadness in her eyes that I saw in Ms. Landry’s. “Olivia”—she puts her fork down, gets up from the table, and pulls me into a soft hug—“how are you?” She tightens her arms around me. “I haven’t seen you in years.”
“I’m good, thank you. It’s so good to see you.”
She releases me and smiles, but I can still see the sympathy in her eyes when she asks, “How’s your family?”
“They’re doing fine.”
We’re all fine, I want to say, but I know that our personal tragedy affected our entire community. It’s not something people just forget about.
“Sit down and play awhile,” an elderly woman says, bringing her floral-painted coffee cup to her mouth. I can’t help but notice the bottle of Baileys Irish Cream parked right in front of her when she lowers the cup and carefully places it on the matching saucer.
“Not today, Grandma,” Audrey says. “Liv just moved back to town and we have a lot of catching up to do. Maybe next time.”
“It’s a shame what happened to your brother,” her grandma says to me. “He was a sweet boy.”
“Grandma,” Audrey reproaches. “I’m sure Liv doesn’t want to talk about that right now.”
“It’s fine,” I say, smiling over conflicting feelings of surprise and relief. It’s kind of nice to hear it straight out like that. “He was. I miss him very much.”
“And the North boy. How’s he doing?”
I try to ignore the way all the eyes in the room have carefully drifted away from me, as if that could disguise their attentive ears. “He’s doing well,” I say, cautiously awaiting further questioning about Gabe.
Another elderly woman sitting next to Audrey’s grandma looks up at me and says, “Same thing happened to my uncle Finn when I was a youngster. Fell off the back of an old flatbed pickup truck that was hauling lumber. Knocked his head so hard, he never was right again.”
“Aunt Mary Joe,” Audrey says, shaking her head, and I feel her tense beside me.
“Was a looker too, just like the North boy. He never got married either. He died in his twenties. Complications.” She sighs and reaches for the Baileys. “Such a shame.”
I swallow hard and say, “Gabe’s okay. Really. He’s doing much better.”
“He is,” Audrey reaffirms. “I saw him just the other day and he was full of smiles.” She gives me a knowing glance, but I see the doubtful looks on the faces around the room. “Well, um, Liv and I have a lot of catching up to do, so...”
“Go on,” her mother says, giving a small, hurried smile. “I’ll see you at dinner.”
“Okay. Bye, everyone.” She pulls me out of the room, quickly shutting the door behind us, and I follow her through the house until we’re standing on the black-and-white parquet floor that spans the kitchen. “I am so sorry.” She spins around and puts her hands on her cheeks. “I forgot they were playing bridge here today. I would have warned you.”
I laugh softly. “It’s fine.”
“Really?”
I bob my head and exhale a quiet breath. “Does everyone think Gabe is permanently...ruined or something?”
“No.” She scrunches her nose and shrugs. “I don’t know. But who cares? It doesn’t matter what people think. Especially not the bridge club of Glynn County.”
“No. But it matters what Gabe thinks. He told me people still look at him differently, and I shrugged it off. I was sure things would be different now, after all this time. But, he’s right.” My weighted heart sinks inside my chest.
How can they not see everything he’s overcome?
“Audrey?”
“Yeah?”
“I’m ready for that drink.”
* * *
Audrey and I sit in white wicker chairs on the veranda of the White Magnolia, overlooking the oak-covered lawn and surrounding marshes that glisten under the late afternoon sun. We watch guests come and go from the inn to the long wooden dock that stretches out over the marsh. Some pose for pictures in front of the breathtaking coastal backdrop, while others just gaze out at it and sip their drinks.
I tell Audrey about Raleigh, and Travis, and why I decided to come back to St. Simons.
She listens carefully until I’m through. “Travis sounds like a nice enough guy, but maybe not the right guy.”
I nod my head in agreement. “I heard Brandon’s voice. When Travis proposed.” I let out a soft, incredulous laugh. “I guess he didn’t approve.”
“He cared so much about you, Liv. That was always so obvious.”
I tip my glass up and sip my minty drink, which burns a little when I swallow it down. “Can I ask you something, Audrey?”
“Of course.”
“You really liked my brother, didn’t you?”
Her expression changes behind the rim of her etched crystal glass, but she smiles as she lowers it. “Yeah. I really did. I thought...”