“Won’t they know this is all a lie?”
“Not if they want to believe that I’ve had a change of heart. They’ll think I’ve come to my senses.”
“Clark, can’t we just go back to what we had? You’ve been with him and gotten it out of your system. Come back to my world.”
“I’m sorry. I could never do that.”
“Well, when did you want to start this?” she asked, taking a deep breath, seemingly resigned to her new role in my life.
“Next week is fine.”
“We’ll go to the tavern right after practice, next Tuesday. Hang out with the team, play some pool, and then leave together, okay?” she asked.
“Okay.” I was already anticipating what was to come, knowing I’d hate every minute of it.
“Nik?”
“Yes?” She said it with this air of expectation, hoping that I’d had an epiphany of some sort.
“Thank you for doing this.”
“You’re welcome,” she said softly.
“WHY the fuck don’t you tell the cops who attacked you?” Lil asked in exasperation. “You know damn well who instigated this.”
“I don’t want them to find out about Clark.”
“Jody, I swear, if you weren’t hurt so bad, I’d smack you upside the head.”
Lil shook from a combination of fear, anger, and disgust over this hateful crime they’d committed against his best friend. What made everything worse was Jody’s stubborn need to keep Clark in the dark. Seeing his best friend lying on the gurney was the worst thing Lil had ever experienced. He didn’t want to go through that again, but Jody was determined to say as little as possible to the officers who’d shown up to investigate. Lil wanted him to tell the truth, or at the very least, let Clark know what was going on, but Jody had made him swear not to do anything.
“They’ll want to know why anyone would want to harm me. Once they find out about my car, and now this, they’ll know that it’s not just a random thing. It’ll open up a can of worms, and I’m not going to do it!”
“Oh, my God, Jody! You are the most intractable man I know!”
“So sue me.”
“Jody, sweetie, I know how much you love him, but don’t you think he’d want you safe? If anything were to happen to you because we didn’t tell him about this incident, he’d never forgive us.”
“Lil, if Clark finds out about this, he’ll do one of two things; drive to Folsom and kill someone, or push me out of his life just to make sure this doesn’t happen again. I’d rather risk another attack than lose him. I also don’t want him going to his parents and flying off the handle. They already hate my guts. Our relationship has caused a huge rift, and I’m not going to risk another blowup. Besides,” Jody said, grabbing Lil’s hand and squeezing it, “nothing else will happen now that I know what to expect.”
“But don’t you think his parents will be expecting Clark to confront them since they were the ones who had you bashed?”
“I don’t know that for sure. It could have been one or the other parent or Nikki or Zach. The possibilities are endless.”
“And how do you propose to keep yourself away from these homophobic pricks?”
“I’ll learn how to protect myself and maybe carry a gun.”
“Oh, holy fucking Christ! You did not just say that!”
“Shut up, Lil. I need time to figure this out.”
“Jody, please, you’re not being smart. Hire a bodyguard, if you must, but don’t try and do this yourself.”
“And how am I going to explain a bodyguard to Clark?”
“I don’t know! Tell him he’s my new boyfriend.”
“We’re dealing with too many lies already. I’m not adding one more.”
Lil erupted into tears, his nerves finally giving out. “You’re going to give me a nervous breakdown.” He sniffled, wiping his eyes with a tissue that he pulled from the box near Jody’s bed.
“Lil, relax, okay? I won’t let anything else happen to me, I promise.”
“How can you say that? You have no idea what kind of people you’re dealing with.”
“Oh, yes I do! My attacker made it very clear.”
“And what exactly do they want?”
“They want me to leave Clark. They want to make sure he’s not spotted or outed or compromised in any way. In essence, I’m to stay away from him.”
“That’s like telling a rat to stay away from cheese.”
“Thank you so much for comparing me to a rat! First, I’m a dog. Now I’m a rat.”
“Huh?”
“Oh. Never mind, Lil. I need to get the hell out of here.”
“How do you plan on explaining your broken rib and the tape around your chest?”
“I have no fucking idea, but I’ll think of something.”
“I’m sure you will. You always do.”
Chapter 25
“STAY a little longer,” Nikki said, pulling Clark back down in his chair.
“No! He’s waiting for me.”
“Right,” Nikki groaned, rolling her eyes and adding a grimace. “We mustn’t keep the good doctor waiting.”
I shot her a disapproving look, and shook my head in disgust. This whole plan was for shit! She was getting territorial again, I was bored out of my skull, and Jody was vibrating in place whenever I’d come home from “date” night. It had been several months since we’d started this charade, and so far, we had everyone fooled. Even my fucking father called to tell me that he was glad I’d come to my senses and dropped the idea of being a pansy.
What a joke! Not only was I a pansy but I loved being a bottom, much to Jody’s surprise. My entire family would roll over in a collective faint if they knew how really gay I was. However, that didn’t take away from the fact that we’d embarked on this mission to get everyone off our backs. By everyone, I meant my parents, my two older brothers, and the entire football world. Our lives had changed drastically since spring training, and now with summer almost over and the season about to start, things would only get worse.
Jody was passing the time with extra trips to the gym, increasing his workouts to four days instead of his normal two. He’d started doing it a few weeks after the big emergency at the hospital, which turned out to be his own emergency. A burnt-out druggie, who’d wandered into the ER with a knife wound, had attacked him and another doctor, bruising him badly enough so that he had to wear tape around his ribs for several weeks. He decided then that he was going to learn to defend himself, to buff up and not let something like that happen again. His efforts hardly went unnoticed as his arms, shoulders, and pecs expanded in direct proportion to his diligence.
“You better stop this or I’ll start to get jealous,” I teased, running both hands down his shoulders and past arms that bulged nicely.
“Jealous of whom?” he asked.
“Of your personal trainer or anyone else who looks twice.”
“I thought I was the only one who did jealous?” Jody asked, bemused.
“That’s because you’ve never given me a reason before.”
“So now that I’m pumping iron, you think I’ve turned into some kind of slut?”
“God, I hope not.” I pressed my mouth to his and softly lapped at his lips like the kitten he’d named me after.
“You have nothing to worry about, Kit.”
“When do I get to meet your trainer?”
“Why do you want to meet him?”
“To make sure he’s old and ugly.”
Jody laughed, the sound so refreshing after months of anxiety. Even though we tried to act like nothing unusual was going on in our lives, we both understood the risks of being found out, and so the tension always hovered above; it just moved in and out like the fog over San Francisco. Jody would come over late at night and leave at the crack of dawn in time to make it to the gym by six o’clock. On the weekends, I’d sneak over to his place and hole up there, never leaving until late Sunday night. It was a horrible way to live,
but we endured it because we had to.
“As it so happens,” Jody continued with a wicked gleam in his eyes, “my trainer’s name is Alec, as in Baldwin, and he sort of looks like him, furry chest and all.”
“Fuck!”
“The good news is that he’s a breeder with four kids!”
“Better,” I said, waiting for more details. “Any other hot men I should start worrying about?”
“Nah,” Jody said. “Lucky for you, I’m a one-man kind of guy.”
“Despite the fact that I’ve turned you into a virtual recluse?”
“I still see daylight coming and going from work,” Jody said, playing along with me. “And the only person I’d want to go out with is either on the football field or in my bed. How can I complain?”
“You’re a pretty lucky guy.”
“The luckiest,” Jody chuckled, pressing up to me.
SATURDAY night, Jody paced his living room, waiting for Lil. They were going to watch Clark’s first game of the season. Clark had given Jody a crash course in the finer points of football just so he’d know when to cheer and when to boo. Jody just wanted to sit high in the bleachers and watch Clark through his newly purchased binoculars. Seeing that tight ass in the sexy uniform would be worth the price of admission. He couldn’t care less about the sport, only the man playing it.
Finally Jody heard Lil’s car, and he grabbed his stadium chair and blanket and met Lil out front. Lil was dressed in a California Golden Bear sweatshirt and black jeans, looking every bit the loyal fan.
“How come you don’t have a Cal shirt?” Lil asked, perturbed.
“I never bought one.”
“What kind of supportive husband are you?”
“The kind that’s living a secret life for the man he loves.”
Lil paused and looked at his best friend. “He has no idea how much you love him, does he?”
“Oh, he knows. I show him every second, of every hour, of every day we’re together.”
“Do tell?”
“Not.”
“You’re no fun at all! What good does it do me to know you’re fucking the hottest guy out there when I have no details to fantasize over?”
“Stop.”
“You’re so protective of him.”
“Why? ’Cause I won’t tell you anything about our sex life?”
“Yes. What’s the fun in being gay if we can’t talk about cock size?”
“I already told you about his cock.”
“All you said was ‘it’s huge!’” Lil mimicked perfectly.
“What other word should I have used?”
“Well, inches for one thing? Nine, ten? What is it? Is he a grower or a shower? Does he scream when he comes or does he moan like an old dog? Has he rimmed you yet? How well does he suck? When did he first bottom, or does he?”
“Jesus Christ, Lil! You’re acting like a fucking teenager.”
“I can’t help it,” Lil squealed. “He’s gorgeous!”
“He is.” Jody’s voice turned dreamy. “Inside and out.”
“Oh, please! Spare me the romantic drivel. I want raunchy details, not vanilla-coated stories.”
“Watch porn.”
“It’s not the same. Okay, enough already. You’re absolutely no fun at all.”
“Sorry to disappoint, old friend.”
“Tell me how you’re doing, sweetie? Obviously working out,” Lil observed, squeezing one of Jody’s biceps. “You’ll start to look like the Arnold pretty soon.”
“Yeah, it’s going well. I’m even learning kickboxing. I just haven’t told Clark about it.”
“I’m assuming that we’ve had no more incidents, correct?”
“Right. Everyone seems to have called off the dogs since Clark and Nikki started going out again.”
“Indeed. And how’s the little cunt doing?”
“She’s still waving it at him every chance she gets. I would so love to see her turned into road kill.”
“Why, Dr. Williams, you’re channeling Joan Crawford. Next we’ll be feeding her dead canaries.”
Jody burst into laughter, happy to be with Lil after many weeks of not seeing him. They’d both been so caught up with life and living; there didn’t seem to be time for much else. Tonight was the first time in a long time that they were together just for the fun of it.
They parked the car and made their way into the stadium. The place was packed, the air rife with excitement as football fans crowded toward their seats. Jody and Lil sat high up in the bleachers, trying to remain as unobtrusive as possible. Jody fully expected Clark’s family to be here en masse, and the last thing he wanted to do was bump into any of them, so even though Lil would have preferred to sit closer, he’d won the argument.
Clark was having a great night with multiple receptions and rushing for two of the three touchdowns. At halftime, Cal was ahead by nine, and everyone was going wild.
“I’m going to get something to eat,” Lil said. “You want to come?”
“Hell yes! I’d rather not sit here and watch the cheerleaders shake their booty, especially one cheerleader in particular.”
“I hear you, brother. Come on.” Lil pulled Jody up from his seat, and they made their way down the steps and over to the snack bar. The lines were long, but it was to be expected, and they waited patiently for their turn. Lil ordered the nacho special while Jody settled for some hotdogs. Once they were handed their order they balanced their food, along with the two drinks, and made their way through the crowd slowly. Jody was too concerned about spilling his drinks to notice the group ahead, but unfortunately, they noticed him. The Stevens clan glared as Lil and Jody approached.
They were almost all there, Mary and Jim with three of their five sons.
“Well, look who’s here,” Zach threw out, staring at Jody as if he were dirt. “It’s Dr. Fruitcake.”
“Zach!” Jason admonished.
“What are you doing here?” Jim asked, addressing Jody.
“Last time I looked, this was a free country. I can be anywhere I want to be,” Jody replied.
“Anywhere but here.”
“Look, I just want to watch the game. I’m not here to cause any trouble.”
“I thought we had an understanding?”
“We did?” Jody asked, curious, until he realized what Jim was implying. “Oh, yes… your message.”
“Wasn’t it clear enough?”
“Loud and clear,” Jody replied.
“Good!” Jim said, the hatred written all over his face. “But it’s hardly relevant anymore, is it?”
“Excuse me?”
“Now that Clark’s announced his engagement,” Jim threw out triumphantly.
“Engagement?” Jody heard the word, but was having trouble processing the meaning.
“Yeah, didn’t you hear? Clark and Nikki are going to get married as soon as they graduate in June!” Zach smiled maliciously, obviously enjoying the look of shock on Jody’s face. “Did you honestly think he was like you? You were a momentary aberration!”
Lil pulled Jody back before he could hit Zach. The food fell all around them as Jody dropped his tray in anger. He would have given his next paycheck to kick Zach in the mouth and try out his newfound kickboxing skills; however, now was neither the time, nor place.
“Come on, Lil,” he said quietly, turning abruptly and heading for the parking lot.
“Jody, what about our blankets and stuff?”
“Forget about them!”
Jody picked up the pace, striding toward his car with only one thought in mind: escape. Lil struggled to keep up, urging him to slow down, but Jody only walked faster, intent on leaving the stadium and the pain behind. He had no idea he was crying until he felt a tug on his arm. It was Jason, one of Clark’s saner brothers.
“Jody. Hey, buddy, I’m sorry about what just happened.”
“It’s not your fault.”
“No. But you’re upset, and I want to explain.”
&nb
sp; Jody backhanded the tears, ashamed to be seen in such a vulnerable state but too distraught to pretend he was unaffected by Jim’s shocking pronouncement. “Clark needs to explain, not you.”
“I’m sure he will as soon as he sees you.”
Lil put his arms around Jody and handed him a paper napkin that he’d tucked into his pocket earlier. “Here you go, sweetie.”
Jody ignored him. “I gotta go.”
“Do you want me to give Clark a message?”
“Yeah! Tell him that I send him all my best for a bright future.”
He turned and walked away from Jason, wanting to distance himself from the blond who reminded him too much of his brother.
Jody was mute on their way home, replaying the scene with the Stevens clan over and over in his head.
“I wonder what happened to make him do something so drastic,” Lil mused. “I would tone down the hysteria until you speak to him.”
“I’m not so sure I want to.”
“Jody, you know you don’t mean that.”
“I’ve done everything he’s asked, Lil. I’ve been in the closet with him, shielded him from everything that’s happened to me, but I will not put up with an engagement, real or otherwise!”
“I’m sure there’s a logical explanation for his decision.”
“It wouldn’t be good enough,” Jody snapped. “And God help him if I find out he’s been sleeping with her all along.”
“I just don’t see that happening, sweetie.”
“Bullshit! I wouldn’t put it past her to try and seduce him. She’s probably knocked up!”
“Jody, you’re spiraling. You need to fucking calm down.”
“Why would he do this? He made it very clear from the beginning that it was all an act. Maybe he’s had a change of heart and decided he’d rather live in the straight world?” Jody’s tears had started again, pouring down his face in a torrent of pain.
Lil pulled into the driveway, killed the engine, and grabbed his best friend to hold him tightly against his body. He rocked him gently as he listened to the weeping that soon turned to a keening that broke his heart. Lil cried, easily affected by Jody’s heartbreak.
“Shh, Jody, please, sweetie. It’s going to be okay.”
Horizons Page 19