by T. S. Joyce
Sora was selling her pictures, too. The moment Annamora signed the first print with her lioness in it, she found acceptance in herself. These people were okay with her animal. They were okay with all of Annamora.
“Look how many people you’re making happy with your art,” Orion murmured in her ear as the next lady in line took her time choosing a sketch.
She leaned her cheek against his, reveling in the scratch of his short beard, and took stock of the moment. It was like a little make-shift party in this tent with a bunch of strangers who weren’t really strangers anymore. They were all just people—laughing, joking, chatting, drinking, learning…just enjoying life instead of hurling insults.
Orion had been right. This was a great way to start forming a bond with Telluride.
“Smart man,” she murmured and kissed him quick on the cheek before she gave her attention back to the dark-haired woman still deciding between a picture of Ronin’s lion sitting between two trees and one of Talon peeking out from behind a cabin.
“There’s not too many left to choose from, huh?” Annamora asked. “Slim pickins. If you want, I can mail you a different picture. Just let me know the lion you want.”
“Oh, no, it’s not that.” The woman looked down at her little boy, his hand squeezing hers. He was maybe five, up on his tiptoes staring at the pictures. Then he’d look at Orion and then the pictures again, back and forth.
“I’m a single mom,” the woman said. “Sherry.” When she held her hand out, it was trembling. “Sorry, my hands are sweating. I’m nervous.”
“It’s okay,” Annamora said, shaking it. “I’m Anna. Nice to meet you. And who’s this?”
“I’m Drake,” the little boy said.
“That’s a very good name,” Orion said. “A strong name for a strong boy.”
“Which one is the strongest?” Drake asked, looking between the pictures.
Orion leaned down and smiled. “Definitely this one.” He pointed to Ronin’s picture. “He’s the king of the Pride.”
“I want to be like him.”
His mother laughed nervously. “Sorry, he really likes the shifters.”
“That’s awesome,” Annamora said. “We really like him. Hey, Drake, do you want me to paint your face like a lion? And then for today, you can be Drake the Lion?”
“Yes! I want that!”
“H-how much for the picture and the face paint?”
Annamora waved her off. “No charge. It’s fun just hanging out with you two. Your cub is pretty cool. I’ll be right back. Just let me grab the face paint out of the truck.”
Orion hung at the table, talking to the little boy, and Annamora kept looking back at them as she made her way to his truck where her supplies were. She couldn’t help it. Orion was so cute talking to the kid, and Drake’s eyes just lit up like the sun when he had Orion’s attention.
With a happy sigh, Annamora opened the passenger door and began riffling through the packs in there, looking for the face paint. Orion had put them somewhere this morning, but she couldn’t remember where. Not in the blue backpack. She pulled a duffle bag from his seat and unzipped it, then froze.
Inside were neatly folded jeans, T-shirts, socks, and underwear. There was a toothbrush and toothpaste in the mesh side pocket along with deodorant, shampoo, and Orion’s cologne.
Annamora dropped the duffle bag onto the seat like it had burned her hands, and really, it felt like it had. She stumbled back two quick steps and stared at the bag.
He was leaving.
Really leaving.
When she dragged her gaze away from the duffle bag to Orion, he was staring back at her with the saddest look in his crystal blue eyes.
Her chest hurt with an ache she’d never felt before.
“The paints are in the front pocket of the blue backpack,” Orion said.
“Okay.” She found them along with some sticks of charcoal, a few colored pencils, and a small drawing pad. She scribbled a note as fast as she could, just poured her heart out, and then ripped the paper form the notepad, folded it, and tucked it into his duffle bag.
She would keep it together and not make this harder for him.
But if he was really going to leave, the second he got to wherever he was going, she wanted him to know he was still cared about.
Annamora needed him to remember her.
Chapter Fourteen
Annamora grunted as she hoisted the cooler into the back of Orion’s truck. It was late, and the first stars were twinkling up in the sky. They’d stayed all day and met so many people, but down to her bones, she was exhausted.
Orion came up behind her and gripped the tailgate on either side of her hips, leaned against her, and brushed his lips against her ear. “I’m sorry.”
“That you have to go?”
He kissed her neck. “You know I don’t want to.”
“I know.”
He set his phone on the tailgate between her hands, the glowing screen looking straight up at her. It was the group thread with his Pride. His Pride.
“Just so you understand.” He kissed her neck and eased away from her.
She turned and hopped up onto the tailgate, the metal cold against the backs of her legs. She dangled her feet as she read.
Orion: You’re gonna come to Tarian Territory and challenge me, Hunter, you stupid fuck? What was your plan? Force me back by pissing me off? Roden, YOU HURT HER.
Roden: I didn’t mean to hurt her, man! I was just trying to keep her out of the Alpha Challenge. She went kitty claw claw on me!
Orion: I’m gonna fucking murder you. Where are you?
Cale: They released us earlier than you. No property damage. and no one was pressing charges. We didn’t have meds to sleep off. They couldn’t keep us.
Orion: Where. The fuck. Are you?
Hunter: I had every fucking right to pull an Alpha Challenge. You aren’t here. We lost everything. Our entire way of life and those goddamn Bloodrunners are sniffing around our territory like we’re steaks. We’re sitting ducks in Maggie’s Valley, and that’s on you. Fighting against your own damn Pride. You’re a piece of shit. Hey, good job on winning the Alpha Challenge, though. Now we can stay in purgatory while you sit up in Ronin’s mountains and get your dick wet.
Orion: I’m a traitor? I protected Sora.
Hunter: From your own dad?
Orion: Yeah, from my fucking dad. And you assholes, too. If you would’ve engaged during that Tarian/Deadlies war, I would’ve killed you, too. You came after my friends.
Cale: We were your friends!
Orion: Who sanctioned the sale of my sister! I watched you assholes stand up in that vote. Who fought me when I tried to free Sora from that contract? You three. Some friends. If you knew the disgusting shit she suffered because of you, and because of my father, you’d go straight to Hell where you belong. Sit on your flame and shut the fuck up. Ask me if I regret turning traitor on the Deadlies. Ask me if I’m sad that your bonds are broken. Hurt Anna. Are you fucking kidding me? You’ll throw Sora to the wolves and then lift your claws on Anna and want me to rule you? I WAS ALREADY COMING BACK!
Roden: Look man, Hunter wanted to challenge. It’s a Pride of three right now, and we have the wolves sniffing at the door. We’re right in the middle of vamp territory, on the edge of Harper’s Mountains, and we’ve got one scary-ass grizzly in our woods. You left us unprotected. At least Hunter was trying to fix us.
Orion: How?
Roden: He was trying to take Alpha. At least then we could make decisions for ourselves, and you could go on living your happy little life.
Hunter: I’ve already started making decisions.
There was a link titled Deadlies Pride applications. Annamora clicked the link. The introduction went a little something like, Abandoned by our asshole twatsniffing pansyboy Alpha, looking for new Pride members, interviews start on May 2. 41010 Donner Way, Maggie’s Valley, NC. If you come to start some shit, we will bring some shit. Serious inquires on
ly.
Roden: So that happened, and Hunter’s dumb ass didn’t specify LIONS ONLY
Orion: So?
Cale: So we’ve had exactly zero lions apply, but we’ve got a handful of vamps, bears, one coyote, a raccoon shifter, which I didn’t even fucking know raccoon shifters existed, and some asshole lunatic who is claiming to be a dragon. Oh, and four male humans and a bunch of single bitches trying to secure contract pairings. With us. So Hunter’s about to turn us into a fucking CREW instead of a PRIDE because he can’t ask us to edit his goddamn application form before he posts it.
Hunter: Fuck you all. I lost the password, so I don’t know how to edit the form. I tried my usual ones. Orionsucks, IhateOrion, Orionisaballsack, and my most used one, Orionisapussyboy, but none of them are working.
Orion: you’re all just as stupid as I remember
Cale: we weren’t trying to ruin your life or go after your girl, Orion. Hunter was just trying to take over the Pride. Way to win yet another Alpha Challenge for a Pride you don’t even want.
Hunter: you mean Crew. Crew he doesn’t even want.
Roden: seriously Hunter, I hate you so much right now.
Cale: Orion, you’re it, man. Help. I’ve never asked anyone for help, but I’m fucking begging you. Just come get us on our feet. We’re hurting, we’ve lost family and friends. Lost leadership. And now we have a whole bunch of desperate shifter rejects headed to our unguarded territory in a week. We don’t know what to fuckin’ do. Just…help.
That was the end of the messages so Annamora turned off his phone screen and watched him help Kannon dump the ice out of the back of the truck.
She felt sick. Orion was pulled in so many directions. He had so many people to make happy, and she didn’t know how he shouldered pressure like that so quietly. But she did know one thing: she hated to see him sad.
So when she caught his glance, she smiled at him. He closed the tailgate to Kannon’s truck and straightened, gripping the metal edge.
“Everything will be okay,” she said, knowing his shifter senses would pick up her words just fine.
“Swear?”
She nodded and tried to infuse more confidence than she felt into her words as she lifted her pinky in the air. “I pinky swear.”
He dropped his head and shook it before he meandered over to her and sat on the tailgate next to her. I’m flying out with the boys. Plane leaves in four hours.”
“Okay. Then for the next fifteen minutes or so, we can still pretend we have a hundred more days like today ahead of us.
“You had a good day?” he asked.
Annamora nodded and leaned against his shoulder. “Honestly? It was the best day of my life. You kissed me fourteen times today. I counted. And you did it in front of people, like you were proud to have me on your arm. And I’m not saying weird stuff around you anymore or hating my awkwardness. I feel better about myself and my artwork, and I have so much cool stuff to decorate my cabin with. I’ll always think of you when I look at it.”
Orion sighed and scooted back, then rested his legs on either side of hers and wrapped his arms around her shoulders. “Take a picture of us like this, so you remember me on your best day.”
Annamora giggled and held up her camera phone. “Say I’ll miss Annamora’s hoohah.”
Orion cracked up, and she took the picture just like that. Both of their eyes half closed, open mouths laughing as he snuggled her cheek against his. Affectionate man.
“Will you drink lots of orange soda?” she asked.
“It’s all I’ll drink.”
“And will you write me letters back?”
“Yes,” he promised.
“Will you ask for help when you’re hurt?” she asked seriously.
Orion let off a soft growl.
“Who’s going to be your life cheerleader when I’m not around?” she asked sadly. “Who will tell you when you’re doing an amazing job as Alpha?”
Orion went quiet and just shook his head.
“Who will make you sack lunches and write you sweet notes in them, only for you to forget your lunch at your job and get into a fight with a Pride and never get to read the life-changing letter that I spent a whole thirty seconds writing?”
He kissed her neck. “Who will remind you of how cute you are when you say weird cuss words?”
“Probably Kannon. But instead of the word ‘cute,’ he will use the word ‘disastrous,’ and it will make me miss you.”
Orion snorted. “In your head, just learn to replace all his insults with nice words.”
“Who will leave you presents on your porch?” she asked.
“Who will leave you presents on yours?”
“We were pretty great for a few days, weren’t we?”
“I think we had more in that few days than some people have in their whole life,” he said in a scratchy voice.
And for as long as she lived, she would never forget those words. Maybe she was the lucky one. At least she’d found it. Some people never found it. Never knew how great it could be.
Love. She knew without a shadow of a doubt she’d found the real kind of love. The selfless kind that could wait while she let a man go fulfill his destiny.
She’d held it in her hands for a few beautiful days, like a cut flower before it wilted. She’d known beauty, the real kind. The kind that reached a heart, the kind that reached a soul.
Oh, she broke down when he got in his truck and drove away, but that wasn’t the important part. Sure, she fell to her knees in the dirt the second his taillights faded from view and let off her first sob since she’d fought her way to freedom from the Old Tarians. And, yeah, she cried because the emptiness in her chest was so big it swallowed her up whole. And, yeah, she leaned back against Sora and the rest of the New Tarians as they wrapped their arms around her and kept all her pieces from breaking apart.
But that wasn’t the important part of this night.
The important part was his words and the knowledge that, after all the damage, a girl like her could still be complete enough and happy enough with herself to fall in love with a good man.
And despite the heartache…that was a victory.
Chapter Fifteen
Orion sat on his old bed, the mattress springs creaking under him as he looked around. Nothing and everything had changed at once. His room looked the same. Simple and clean. Same brown bedding… Brown. The opposite of Annamora. Same clean, beige walls, same TV up on the simple five-drawer dresser, same brown dirty-clothes hamper, same desk in the corner, same cushion-less chair in front of it, same curtains, same window, same room.
But it felt different. It felt unfamiliar, like someone else had lived here and he’d only heard secondhand stories about this place. Like they weren’t his memories because they were too blurry. The only thing in focus was Annamora.
He wondered how her new decorations looked in her cabin.
He was unpacking his duffle bag and paused when he came to the letter in the bottom. A part of him didn’t want to read it because he was already having such a hard time. She’d looked so sad when he’d driven away. He’d taken her smiles away.
He sat there holding the little paper treasure for a few seconds before he unfolded it.
Orion,
First letter, here we go. It’ll have to be quick because you are distracting a very cute little kid named Drake. You’re leaving. Just writing that makes it real. Whenever you get where you’re going, I want you to know it’s okay. You’re gonna be a great Alpha. It doesn’t matter how many miles separate us. I’m still here. You won’t ever be alone because you can just call me, text me, or write me, and then we won’t feel so far away. I’m gonna be good at this, you’ll see. I miss you already. And just so you know, you are deeply loved. I mean, you’re loved by a plain, strange, bottom-of-the-pride, awkward gutter-lion who eats too many potato chips and has some really questionable handwriting right now, but it’s still the L-word. It counts.
You are important
.
Yours always,
Anna
He read it four times and would’ve read it a fifth if his phone hadn’t vibrated.
He pulled it out of his back pocket and exhaled a relieved breath when he read the name on the text. There she was.
Anna had sent him four pictures. One of the front entryway with the bench and coat rack, one of the iron decoration in the bedroom, and one of the table with the new vase and wooden coasters. The cabin looked so damn cute. And colorful, like her. The final picture was a half-eaten tub of chocolate chip cookie dough ice cream, a bottle of wine, a box of tissues, and the television in the background, paused on a romantic comedy he’d never been tempted to watch. The girls were in her living room, all talking.
Anna: Goodnight, Orion the Tough Lion.
He smiled as he typed out You girls enjoy movie night. Anna, Come Sit on My Banana. Send.
Anna: Very poetic.
Whatever, go drink that bottle of wine, ya lush. Send nudes. Send.
She sent a picture of a naked mole rat.
Orion laughed for the first time since yesterday. Felt good. Are you okay tonight? Send.
Anna: Sad. Otherwise I’m okay. You?
Same. Send. Thank you for the letter. I just read it. Send.
Anna: I’m glad you found it. Sleep good, okay?
Just so you know…you are loved too… Send.
Anna: I love you too.
Anna: What?
Anna: I mean you already said that. I love you.
Anna: Oh God.
Anna: Love y
Anna: Go to sleep.
Anna: None of this happened.
Anna: Just pretend I was smooth when you said the L-word.